Remember how two days ago, I mentioned how horrible I felt? Well, I now understand that crying yourself to sleep can do a number on you.
But it feels even worse to wake up to the sound of arguing voices.
I hate arguments! Only when I'm not in them, of course.
At first, I found sleep more important and clutched the pillow tightly to my ear.
But on realizing how shady Trish was becoming, my priorities changed.
There was one thing most people don't know about Trish. She can't keep a secret well. But, her years of professional training may have changed that about her.
But, then again, how much can a person change? She always had the tendency to shout out a secret when angry or anxious. And arguments are the prime medium to anger Trish, right? Especially if it's with Dez or Alex.
And about Alex? He could hold a secret to his grave. He's that good! I still remember how he never revealed his phone password back in our teens; I still don't know!
Back then, we were close. Around the time, I was fifteen, I guess we drifted apart; when he was taken for addiction recovery.
And when after a year he came back, I remember how distant we felt.
Right now, I only feel a brotherly bond, one that is based on respect. And I vowed to rebuild the relation we used to have.
Slowly dropping the pillow and holding my ear to the door, I tried to listen.
"And that's how we're here," Trish concluded.
"Yes, but couldn't you have at least informed us that she was alive?" a voice bellowed.
"You changed your number, doof. You vanished, just like Aus, but we had some idea about where you were," Trish reasoned
"Oh, wait - how come Austin didn't tell you where he is? And what about you-know-who?" with his anger dissipating, Ace asked.
"Dez literally tracked the whole of the US to find him. But no sign of Aus! He sold their flat. He disabled his old number. And the last photo in his Tweeter profile was on Ally's birthday, years ago," she answered.
"Man, why would he do that? And didn't you guys attend his last concert?" he asked.
"Guilt does things to you. And about the last concert, we weren't there! We couldn't bear to watch him so broken, while standing on his favourite place on Earth- the stage!" Trish exclaimed, at the verge of an outburst.
I could hear him sigh, "So, we have to keep our guards high, in front of her? I feel bad for her. She is my sister after all, can't I tell her anything?" He sounded slightly sympathetic.
"The medical reports suggest that she may never recall the two years, before her accident. But, there is still hope," she whispered, "You can tell her about her past, like highschool things, but not about you-know-what and you-know-who, clear?"
The statement 'she may never recall the two years before her accident' seemed stuck in my head. Why! Why me, God? I asked in my mind, while leaning onto the door. Their conversations continued, but I blocked them out.
Once I heard their footsteps move away, I decided that it was time to 'get up'.
Rearranging the scowl on my face into one of a sleepy frown, I got ready and walked down to the hall.
"Noon Sleeping Beauty," Ace teased.
"Morning Thumb-sucker, it's only 11:55 am," I fired back. It was one nickname I used for him, since I caught him doing so, back when we were children.
At the sound of laughter, behind him, he turned slightly red, "You were never a morning person, Feisty," he grumbled.
"Sorry, what was that?" I asked cupping my ear towards him, "Couldn't hear you over the sound of your incompetence," I teased childishly.
What? Mornings bring out the child in me, especially when I'm sleep-ridden! And I was never an early bird. NEVER!
I still remember, Austin used to wake me up for college, living together and all.
"Ha ha," he deadpanned, before walking away.
Again, laughter was heard. I turned my head to see Siena, preparing breakfast in the kitchen.
"Hey Si!" I greeted, "What's cooking?" I asked, while walking towards the wonderful smell coming from the kitchen. I grabbed a sandwich from the kitchen counter and gulped it down.
She smiled, "Hey Lee, I mean Ally-" she stuttered.
"No, no, keep it as Lee," I replied, "We are going to get along great, I can feel it, so might as well have you call me something special."
She smiled again, but in a more welcoming manner, "So, Lee, I'm cooking ratatouille. I don't know if you like it though."
"Hey! Don't diss a good old ratatouille," I laughed, "I would love to have a home cooked country meal, especially after three agonizing years."
She looked surprised at how easily I brought up the accident.
"You seem easy to talk to," she simply stated.
I shook my head humorously, "What, did Ace tell you that I bite?" I asked, obviously joking.
But seeing her smile sheepishly, my laughter died down, "He did, didn't he? That jerk!"
She laughed, "You guys are so cute!"
I beamed before setting the plates on the table.
"We weren't always like this," I said sadly.
She placed her hand on my shoulder, "I know, he told me. You know, just yesterday, he was telling me how much he missed you and how much he regretted pushing you away."
I was grateful to hear that I wasn't the only one who felt that way, "Thanks."
"Don't worry about it," she said, while placing the newly cooked dish on the table.
After a beat of silence, I asked,"So what's your story? Tell me how you guys met and all of that."
She smiled fondly, "Well, I am Siena Rodgers, originally from Miami. Thirty year old girl, who worked as Ronnie Ramone's manager. My family is similar to yours, you know, single mom and a younger sister, it's kinda how we bonded, your brother and I."
I nodded in understanding.
"Wait, is your sister named Ridley, by any chance?" I asked, curious.
Thinking intently, she replied, "Yes, oh I think you were classmates, she used to tell me about a girl named Ally, who she admired."
"Ya, how is she?" I asked, trying to dodge the unwanted compliment.
I could tell she noticed it, but she continued anyway, "Ridley is actually really happy. She's now a singer working for Starr Records; married to Trent Jackson and even has a kid."
The fact that she had achieved her dream of being a singer, left me proud. Back then, we worked together for me to get over my fear of what others thought about me and for her to overcome her stagefright and shyness.
"Awww! I was the one who introduced them!" I cooed.
"Ya, they are very cute and their girl is a handful, a very naughty fella," she replied.
I nodded, smiling fondly, imagining what their happy family looked like.
"OK, back to you guys," I pried.
"So, we met each other five years ago at the workplace, obviously, we collaborated to schedule Ronnie's life. For about a year, we were good friends. We actually knew about each other's family and told each other pretty much everything. We even went on a few dates together," she paused,
"You know, your accident was like a blow to his head. Lexy was so vulnerable, he cried and cried like hell, when he got the phone call from your friend. He immediately flew to NYC to be there for you, along with Lester. At that time, I had promised to do his part of the job as well. So, he returned about a year later saying that you wouldn't survive and that he wished he could be more of a brother to you. Lester passed away a few days later of a cardiac arrest and Lexy was a wreck. It was at that time that I decided to bring him here, to get away from everything. We stayed here for about two months and he had calmed down. It was here, right in this house, where he told me he loved me. After we returned, he sold Sonic Boom to a guy called Ethan and a few months later, proposed to me. And now, here we are," she finished, breathlessly.
"Oh my god! You are a rambler just like me!" I laughed.
But my laughter soon died down as I pulled her in for a hug.
"Thank you," I whispered, "I hate how I caused so many people such pain and..and I'm glad he had someone like you to rely on… and.. I..I couldn't ask for a better sister!" my voice cracked, as I felt wetness on my cheeks. I was so grateful to this wonderful blonde in front of me. She is such a sweetheart.
"It's okay, girl, I've got you," she comforted, "Anytime you need to talk, I'll be here," she said while running her fingers through my hair, almost mothering me.
After a while, I pulled away, wiping away the tears on my sweater sleeve.
"So, tell me about your Romeo," she asked in a teasing tone.
I laughed and replied, "He poofed."
"I know about that, but I meant how you guys met and all," she smiled fondly.
"Our story is very cliché. He was my bully, I gave him my song, we became best friends, I told him I loved him, he reciprocated, he proposed, we married, I got into an accident, he cried and now, he disappeared," I explained tonelessly.
"Wow!" she said sarcastically, "So much emotion. Did you just tell me your love story or gave me directions to your house?"
"OK, I'll go again," I sighed, "He was my bully," I contorted my face into a scared expression, " I gave him my song," I smiled and nodded, "We became best friends, I told him I loved him, he reciprocated, he proposed, we married, I got into an accident, he cried and now, he disappeared. So magical!" I repeated.
She only laughed, "Your brother was right about you."
"What? That I bite?"
"No, he said not to mess with you, you get sarcastic and you're a writer, so you use huge words in arguments."
I simply laughed, then sighed, "I miss Austin, so bad."
She held my hand, "Lee, people who matter most are the ones that have to leave us. It's a given that you miss him. But, I know that you love him enough to find him, pull him out by the ear and argue with him for being stupid."
"Thanks again, Si," I grinned.
We then spent a while sorting out the dishes and set the lunch table.
Yes, lunch, since I woke up late and missed breakfast.
"Hey Si, where are Alex and Trish?" I asked.
"Trish went to get the groceries while Alex...I don't know what he's doing, probably something to waste time, like all men do."
I laughed at her sense of humour. It's amazing how much she made me feel welcome. To me, she was already family and I would do literally anything to keep her safe.
Suddenly I asked, "What is it like to be a mother?"
She looked at me, confused, "What do you mean? Shouldn't you-"
She was cut off by my brother, "Hey Si, is lunch ready? I'm kinda hungry," he expressed, dramatically.
"And Ally, would you wake Milan up? Second door on the left?" he asked.
I nodded and walked towards the direction he pointed to, but, I swear I heard him grumble, "Just in time."
Walking into the room he instructed, I saw the little one sleeping soundly in his cradle. It's weird how this one was sleeping. He is one year old, but most kids his age cry their lungs out and wake up earlier.
I swear, this one is a Dawson for sure!
I observed the peaceful little boy, wrapped in a blue blanket with his eyes closed; he was a carbon copy of his dad with Si's nose, of course. I would have just sat and stared at the bundle of joy with his cute button nose and big chubby cheeks, but I had to wake him up.
Shifting the blanket slightly, I tickled under his little feet.
A secret: All Dawson's are ticklish under their feet.
I smiled when I heard a slight giggle escape those cute pink lips.
It felt like deja vu. Maybe I have had an experience with kids before, being a novelist and all, I remember visiting orphanages and hospitals for reading sessions.
"Hey Milly, time to wake up!" I cooed.
Once he opened his eyes, I lifted him in my arms and carried him to the kitchen, handing him over to Si.
By this time, Trish was back, she lay on the couch, sipping her coffee.
The rest of the afternoon, we spent talking and laughing, having lunch like a family and for a brief second, I felt peaceful.
Alex had some work in his lodge, so he left. He left after I argued with him on how stupid it was to name his lodge, 'THE LODGE' , when he had a writer sister who had a book full of names for hotels!
After that, I was either talking with Si, asking Trish things or playing with Milan.
And my phone? Well, let's just say that after my emotional outburst, two days ago, Trish permanently banned me from using the internet to search about Austin or me or anything.
Me, being the goody-two-shoes I am, complied…
Alex returned around eight for dinner and we had the best meal ever, special courtesy to Siena.
"Oh! I married her for the food," Alex had joked, receiving him a slap on his chest.
I laughed at this, "Hey Si, give him one from my side as well."
"Me as well," Trish added.
"I'm happy to," she agreed, giving him another shove.
"Hey! You girls can't gang up on me. I'm the only guy here and I'm losing my manliness, geez!" he dramatized.
That's how dinner went, so full of laughter, so full of life.
Once dinner was done, I recalled the poem in my book and vowed to ask Alex the next day about it.
That's how I felt asleep, with a smile on my face. For the first time…