OK... this time you get a second chap you needy buggers, lucky that you are so damned cute xxxx
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7
Toshiko found Ianto in the back room of the store, hiding. He had a cat in his lap, an unopened book beside him and he was in a huge beanbag chair staring into space morosely.
"Hey. Where did you get to last night?" she asked as she sank into another chair and looked at him with genuine interest "It got boring after you left."
"I went outside for air, a woman came along and tried to rent me and when I told her to stuff off she arrested me for soliciting by tasering me… I slammed my head and they dragged my unconscious self to jail where they threw me in the cells overnight. I went before the judge this morning who knows me and was as pissed off as me. I went to Grandy but got no sympathy because Jack went early to complain what a shit date I am… really Toshi… my life is never boring, but that does not mean its any fun either."
Toshiko gaped at him "What?"
"Yeah. My life sucks and sometimes I wonder what the hell I bother for. I mean… I am only here for Grandy and he is going soon… what the hell am I gonna do when he's gone? There will be no one. I will be alone. I could have died, they left me in that cell without medical attention and a concussion. Crazy. I mean… who would care. Please tell me someone remembered my jacket on the chair at least!" Ianto lifted the cat for a better cuddle position.
"Yeah, Jack did."
"Oh… it didn't work out with the big titted one at the bar? Pity… he looked quite keen the way he was staring at her tits" Ianto rose from the bean bag and then froze, then staggered a bit and swore, still cuddling the cat as he made his way to the fridge in the corner of his office "Soda?"
Toshiko was no longer watching him, pulling out her little tablet that she started to tap on and she soon had CCTV footage of the arrest as well as inside the pub at the bar where she watched Jack not only talking intimately to this woman Ianto had mentioned but then he had leaned over and whispered in her ear as she laughed…. Jesus Christ. It did look like flirting.
"Ianto… that is Gwen. She works with Jack… like… another caregiver" Toshiko said as she watched Ianto place her soda beside her, taking take his own to clumsily flop down. The cat no longer to be seen as the crunching of little teeth told her it was getting t a treat behind the desk.
"Caregiver… right. You know I watched for about eight minutes before I decided to get some air for a sec. I was coming back ya know… how long before he noticed me gone?"
Toshiko struggled and then shrugged "Ten… twelve?"
"Hmmmm. You know, it's not his fault. He does not know I am needy, broken and damaged goods… not really. You see… people think we are all just people, not these sacks of pain and scars and regrets. Sorrow and mistrust. I don't know if there is even a real heart in here. Just remnants… a ghost in the machine right? Thought maybe there was, thought maybe this time… he made something stir deep down and … silly really. Just lust after all … clearly one sided." Ianto popped the tab on his soda can and took a swig "I need to stay in my lane."
"Don't" she sighed "Ianto please don't' give up. Let him have a moment to explain and be contrite. No one is perfect, you just said so yourself. And Jack... well... he's different, you have to admit that. Come on surely he is worth the chance of an apology? Please?"
"Why are you so invested?" Ianto asked.
"Because I love you, ya twerp. Don't let this stop you... you know you always turn away … stop it. Break the cycle… take a second chance. Come on" she asked "Let him explain, apologize. Please, it does not make you less of a man."
"Whatever. Jack does not care about me. Going to Grandy early this morning to whinge really set me on edge. What a pussy move" Ianto took another swig then pointed "Can you pass that bottle of pills? I am supposed to take them until the ringing in my ears subsides."
"Has Owen checked you over?"
"Nope. Don't want him pawing at me, you know I hate being touched by anyone" Ianto rose like he could not settle, pacing now as he clutched the soda can "I just… I just… I don't know Tosh. It is worth it? I mean… you've seen Jack. He's so damned handsome. It will only be a matter of time before he sees that I am too much work, not enough pay off. Someone prettier will come along and he will be off. Another Titty Big Gap."
"He is not your parents. He will not turn from you.. Ianto… you are not giving him the chance to prove it. You are doing what you always do… striking first. Not everyone is out to hurt you."
"No… I guess you are right. I am too busy hurting myself" Ianto dropped the can in the rubbish bin and looked down with a defeated air "I just need to stop trying. I will be a happy old spinster with my eighty cats and comfortable slippers."
Toshiko started to laugh and he smiled wanly as he caught his silly statement.
As if he would grow old. With Grandy gone… he would have nothing left to live for.