You woke up to feel a comforting warmth under you and a careful hand in your hair. You snuggled into a pair of strong thighs before suddenly remembering the situation from the night before, you jerked up and turned to face the silver-haired man, blinking at him you asked.
"What? What happened? What time is it?" You said looking around the room for your clock. "You don't remember? You had a panic attack last night, it went on for about twenty minutes but I'm pretty sure you blacked out," Kakashi explained, he reached his arms up and forced you to face him, with his hands caressing your cheeks, he asked, "are you feeling better?"
You blinked at him some more, your face heating. god, I went so long without him seeing me like that.
"I'm sorry," you mumbled, refusing to meet his gaze, "I thought I had that under control."
"Don't." Kakashi said, dropping his hands from your face, "I should be the one apologizing." You looked up at him now, this time Kakashi avoided your gaze for a moment, he took a deep breath and faced you.
"I left, I left you alone. You had no one, I abandoned you. You had to deal with all of this by yourself when you didn't have to, I could've helped you, I should have helped you but I... I got so caught up in my own problems I completely ignored you. You were trying so hard to reach out to me and I..." Kakashi stopped, taking a few breaths and turning his gaze from you once again, he opened his mouth to speak again but you spoke first.
"Kakashi stop," you said, "you've been through so much, you had every right to collapse into yourself, you were in pain, you were grieving. You needed help and it was clear I couldn't give you the help you needed. Yes I missed you yes I felt alone and scared but look at you," you stood up from the couch and gestured to his whole body. "You're healthy, you're happy, you're smiling like you used to smile, you're laughing like you used to laugh, your eyes soften like they used to. You're finally you again but a whole different person at the same time. I'm proud of you, you pulled yourself out and you have people to care for, people who love you. Sure I was alone but it's not your job to fix that, you were doing everything you could with what you had and that's okay." When you were finished Kakashi stood up from the couch and pulled you into a tight hug.
"Thank you Y/N, thank you for not giving up on me. I promise you I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere." You wrapped your arms around him, feeling his warmth, his chin resting on top of your head. He pulled back with his arms still around you and stared down into your eyes, you smiled up at him.
"Uh, Kakashi?" You said, realising the time.
"Hmm," Kakashi hummed, not wanting to ruin the moment. unfortunately, you decided to do that for him. "It's nine-thirty," you watched Kakashi's eyes widen in fear and he swore, Tsunade was going to kill him, "go!" you laughed when he didn't move. you watched him struggle to force himself apart from you and head for the door. "I'll come to see you later?" he said, more of a question than a statement. You nodded, he stood in your doorway for a few seconds, neither of you saying anything. Then he was gone, taking off down the road toward the Hokage tower.
"uuugggghhhh," you heard a loud exaggerated groan from the doorway to your store as you were closing, you turned to find Kakashi banging his head on the doorframe, you approached him and raised an eyebrow and you came to a stop and jiggled your keys in front of him, silently telling him to move so you could lock the door.
"Long day?" you asked as he moved out of your way so you could lock the door.
"Guy and Kurenai want me and my new/old friend to go drinking with them," Kakashi said, letting out another exaggerated groan. You raised your eyebrows at him again, "new/old friend?" Kakashi breathed a laugh and shrugged, gesturing to you with both hands. "Ah," you started, "well.." Kakashi stopped you, "You don't have to, I told them it probably wasn't going to happen." He rubbed the back of his neck. After what happened the night before he didn't want you forcing yourself to go out and be social. "No I think it'll be fine, I mean I don't think I've ever met your friends, not without my mask anyway, so really they've never met me," you laughed.
"Are you sure? I don't want you to force yourself, honestly, I'm not even sure I wanna go," Kakashi said, "I want to, I'd like to meet your friends." You smiled at him, you didn't have any friends, you'd always been a bit of a shut-in, over the years Kakashi was the only friend you ever had so you were excited that his friends wanted to meet you, nervous, but excited.
"R-really," Kakashi said, his hand on the back of his neck and his eyes slightly wide in surprise considering your history. "If you're sure then I'd love for you to meet them, they're great people." Kakashi smiled to himself thinking of his friends. "Are we going to a bar? Just let me get changed first," You said turning to walk up the stairs into your apartment. "Uh yeah, I'll just wait here."
You took longer to get ready than expected, usually for something like this you'd just threw on pants and a shirt, not that you went out much, but right now you were meeting Kakashi's friends for the first time and wanted to make a good impression. You found a dress your mother had bought you some time ago that you never wore simply to spite her, but if you were being honest it did look good. You decided to actually put effort onto your hair this time, putting half up into a ponytail and letting the other half down, two pieces of hair falling and framing the sides of your face. The dress was a dark green, almost brown, loose dress with a black belt, low cut and long sleeves. You wore black knee-high boots not liking to show your legs since you had scars up your calves from injuries you got in the Anbu. When you walked back downstairs you found Kakashi by the counter looking at bookmarks you had on display, he was holding one when you walked in and almost instantly dropped it when he laid eyes on you. He stuttered as he went to pick it up, he faced you and gestured to the door.
"You look great," he said, you thanked him as you walked out the door, locking it again behind you and Kakashi lead you to the bar where you were to meet his friends. Before you walked into the bar Kakashi stood with his hands on the doorknob and spoke.
"Just.." he sighed, "Guy can be a little... passionate," he said bringing slightly, "just if it's too much tell me and we'll leave. Just be careful around Guy, he can be a lot." Kakashi seemed more nervous than you were you noticed, you nodded and he opened the door. As soon as you walked in you saw Guy, even in a wheelchair, he was easy to spot in that bright green suit he's always wearing.
"KAKASHI" he shouted from across the bar, waving to his friend, "my rival, it's good to see you!" As you approached you saw the realisation in his eyes, "OH! it this the beautiful woman you were telling us about?" Kakashi was in front of him in an instant throwing him glares to shut him up, you giggled from behind Kakashi. "Hello! Might Guy, it's nice to meet you," he said, wheeling his way past Kakashi to introduce himself. "H-hello, it's good to meet you I'm Y/N L/N," you said taking his hand as he offered it, it was a solid handshake, almost intimidating.
"Kakashi you actually came," you turned to find the one you knew as Kurenai walking back from the bar, "uh yeah... Anko's not here?" Kakashi questioned.
"She was, she's already found her prey for tonight," Kurenai replied with a giggle and an eye roll, she turned to with a surprised expression. "Ah, your Y/N right? Kakashi's always talking about you, I didn't think you'd actually come." To your right, you saw Kakashi stiffen out the corner of your eye.
"Well I figured it was time to meet Kakashi's friend, for real this time," you said rubbing the back of your neck. "Hm? What does that mean?" The woman asked with a raised eyebrow. "Y/N is former Anbu, you guys probably met then, when she was still wearing her mask," Kakashi answered for you.
"Oh," she said, giving Guy a look you couldn't figure out. "Well it's nice to finally meet you," she said giving you a bright smile, which you returned in full.
"Come on, let's get a drink," Kakashi pulled you away from his friends and toward the bar.
As the night went on you figured out just how Kakashi came to be the man before you today. You finally heard the story of how and why he was released from the Anbu, which you thoroughly thanks to the two shinobi for. The three of them told stories of their genin teams and how team 7 helped bring out Kakashi's old self again, stories of joint missions and training sessions. Kakashi was happy, he was laughing and you loved the sound of it.
They asked about what Kakashi was like when you were growing up. Of course, they knew Kakashi as children but as your parents were friends you spent a lot more time with him than they did and from a much younger age. You told them stories of your childhood together, little stories and forgotten secrets, Kakashi telling them small details he remembered about you and how much and how little you'd changed and you doing the same.
You were proud of how long you'd managed to stay there chatting with them, they were easy to get along with, you were glad Kakashi had such good friends, and that you were one of them. But around midnight your anxiety began telling you you'd been there for too long. You tried to hide your shaking hands under the table, refusing any more drinks as you'd thought they weren't helping with your anxiety, you'd drunk enough as is.
"Well it's getting pretty late, I told Shikamaru I wouldn't leave him alone with Mirai all night," Kurenai laughed, you let out a relieved breath at that, immediately drawing Kakashi's attention. He put his hand over yours under the table, noticing that shaking as he did so. He stilled your hands and narrowed his eyes at you, you didn't meet his gaze, instead, you pushed through it and smiled at the others.
"I'll be going now, bye guys," Kurenai waved, "and it was lovely meeting you Y/N, I hope we can hang o it again soon," she waved you goodbye. "It was fun, I hope so too," you replied as she walked away. You turned back to look at Guy, who you found exchanging looks with Kakashi.
"Well," he said, clapping his hands together, "I should also go, it is rather late," coming around the table in his chair.
"Good night Kakashi, take care of my rival Y/N, I leave him in your hands," he laughed, giving a blinding smile. You laughed and said your goodbyes, assuring him you'd take care of Kakashi. Once he was out the door you turned to Kakashi.
"You told him to leave didn't you?" He blinked. He laughed. He stood up.
"Mah, I don't know what you're talking about," you said offering you his hand, "we should go to, I'll walk you home." You took his hand, giving a smile that said, you didn't have to do that, I was fine. He returned it with a similar look that said, I know but I wanted to help, so accept my help.
Kakashi helped you walk home, both of you a little unstable as a result of the alcohol in your systems. He walked you up the stairs to your apartment door and waited for you to unlock it before he said goodnight and left. Just as you'd managed to get the key in the lock you felt strong arms wrapping around your waist and warm breath on your neck, your breath hitched as Kakashi pulled you against him. He buried his face in your neck and breathed in your scent.
"Have I ever told you you smell really nice," he said against your neck, you mumbled a no, still trying to unlock the door. He didn't move or say anything else until the door was unlocked and opening.
"Hmm," he hummed against your neck, the vibration sending a shiver down your body. "Kakashi?" He hummed again, not willing to let go. "Kakashi," you said, more firm this time. This time getting a defiant groan for a reply. You sighed and tried to step forward, not going anywhere as Kakashi held you tight
"At least come inside if your not gonna let go, it's cold out here," you said, earning another groan. Kakashi started moving then, he walked forward and took you with him, lifting you off the ground and bring you to the couch and kicking the door closed behind him.
"Kakashi!" You squeaked out as he landed on the couch with you still in his arms, you wriggled trying to out of his hold but he squeezed you tighter. He had you sitting in his lap now and he leaned against the arm of the couch, he pressed his face into your neck again and his warm breath sent shivers down your spine.
"I missed you so much Y/N, I'm angry with myself. I'm so sorry I pushed you away."
"Kakashi we've been over this, I'm not upset with you, it's okay," you said, trying to reassure him.
"No," he groaned into your neck, "this is about me. I should've let you help me. I don't ever want to be apart from you again." He breathed in your scent and snuggled farther into you, he brushed his nose up your neck and your breath hitched. You stayed silent for a minute before turning your head slightly, enough so he didn't have to move.
"Would you like to stay here tonight?"