Chapter 7
4 Years after the Hundred Year War
Fishing Village, South-Eastern United Republic
After an entire day spent on a long and exhausting walk, Azula and Katara finally reached a small coastal fishing village as the sky already began to darken. It was not the sort of village that would have an inn, so Azula had forced Katara to humiliate herself by asking some villagers for help. In the end, they had been directed to an empty hut and later brought some questionable looking fish stew with which to quench their hunger. Having gone without a scrap of food for two days, Azula decided not to complain about the quality of food, the two of them devouring the entire pot of stew in short order.
Following the meal, Katara had suggested that they retire immediately with the intent of starting out again with the break of dawn, but Azula had shot down that idea. There were things that needed addressing, and Azula was in no mood to postpone this inevitable conversation, starting with reconsidering the route they had chosen. They had lost most of their supplies, but importantly, Katara still had her heavy money belt, and Azula had held on to the map she had purchased, relieved about her decision to keep it in her pocket and not with the rest of her belongings in the backpack which had been taken by the Dai Li.
"So," Azula began, spreading the map out on the floor in the sparse light of the oil lamp. She didn't want to risk augmenting the flame with her bending. The dry hovel looked like it needed one good spark to burn down in a few seconds. "June told us that the Dai Li suspect we're going to Ba Sing Se, which means they're watching all the main roads. What does that mean for us?"
"I'm not sure," Katara admitted thoughtfully. "Would they consider our current route a main road?"
"I don't think so, they were only here because they had June and her shirshu leading them," Azula replied. "I suspect we will only have to start worrying as we near Ba Sing Se. We're still a very long way from the capital."
"So, we can continue on our chosen route for now?" Katara asked.
"I think so," Azula nodded. "You saw that forest. I don't want to trudge through that mess."
"Agreed," the waterbender nodded. "Then we proceed to go this way, down to the tip of the peninsula, right?"
"Yes, and then we cross the waters here," Azula pointed at the map, their fingers touching briefly before Katara pulled away. "But we'll have to make a decision when we arrive here," the princess pointed at the large lake on the map, split in two by the Serpent's Pass. "I thought we could go around the lake by traveling south and using the ferry way station to cross over."
"The Dai Li will definitely have their eyes on ferry traffic," Katara said. "But we don't have to use a ferry. I can get us across on an ice raft, as you know."
"Can your ice raft get us across the mountains that form this impenetrable barrier west of Ba Sing Se?" Azula snapped. Katara's inability to read the map could be so frustrating. "It's almost entirely blocked off. That's why when traveling to Ba Sing Se from the south, your only options are the ferry way station or the Serpent's Pass. It makes it very easy for the Dai Li to monitor all the approaches."
"I see," Katara nodded curtly. Her face had reddened a little, the waterbender feeling embarrassed about her mistake. "Could we approach from the north?"
"We could, and honestly, it would make the most sense," Azula said. "There are only a few decent roads and not too many settlements, though, so... we might have to camp in the wilderness." She made a disgusted face from that thought. "And the Dai Li might still be watching the roads. Still, I think it will be safer to approach from the north."
"Fine, it is decided," Katara spoke quickly. "Can we get some sleep now?"
"Not so fast," Azula snapped, reaching out and grabbing the waterbender's arm, preventing her from withdrawing. "There's something else we need to talk about, Katara," she said, facing the other girl with a firm, piercing stare.
"Such as?" Katara asked with a frown on her face.
"Such as what happened last night at the Dai Li camp," Azula did not relent. "What was that? What did you do?"
"I'm not sure I understand, Azula," Katara replied. She was a laughably terrible liar, her eyes shifting all over the place as she spoke, unable to maintain eye contact.
"Don't even try that with me!" Azula snapped at her, irritated that the waterbender would even consider trying to lie to her. "I saw you bending! I don't know how, but you made that Dai Li guy walk right into the fire like he was possessed!"
"Ah," Katara winced. "You noticed."
"What, do you think me blind? I'm not your earthbender friend, remember?" Azula narrowed her eyes, getting annoyed at Katara's stalling. "Now tell me what you did to that guy! I've never seen bending like that before!"
"I'm not surprised," Katara shrugged. "Well... if you really must know, it is called bloodbending."
"Bloodbending?" Azula's eyes widened slightly. "Like... bending with blood? Blood that's inside someone?" Katara nodded, looking deeply reluctant, but there was more... did she look guilty? Her cerulean blue eyes held a strange, pained expression. "That's... fuck, that's crazy. I didn't even know such a thing was possible."
"It is very rare," Katara spoke quietly. "And its use is heavily condemned, as you might imagine."
Azula in all honesty could not imagine why. "But it must be incredibly powerful!" she exclaimed. "Why aren't you using it more often?"
Katara looked horrified beyond belief. "Don't say that! It's awful!"
"Pfft," Azula frowned as she shook her head. "Seems like it's just a more powerful kind of bending. That's like saying I shouldn't bend lightning because it's too powerful. It doesn't make sense."
"It's not the same," Katara shook her head vehemently. "You don't know how it feels to use bloodbending. What it does to the people I use it on. It's... horrible, to rob someone of control over their own body." Katara must have seen the look of indifference on Azula's face as she decided to continue. "Imagine if I used it on you, Azula. I could make you do literally anything. I could force you to walk into the ocean and remain under the water until you drowned. Or I could make you douse yourself with lamp oil and set yourself on fire. That's why I maintain that bloodbending is a terrible curse and I should only use it as a last resort."
Azula remained silent for a while, the images conjured by Katara proving difficult to shake off. If Katara was not lying about the power of bloodbending, and Azula had seen the evidence for it herself, then the waterbender had a very powerful... and in some ways, rather frightening tool at her disposal. Suddenly, Azula realized something that she had been wondering about earlier. "So that's why you are so confident that you can keep me from taking you down and escaping!" she snapped her fingers.
"Believe me, Azula," Katara gave her a look that appeared completely earnest. "Using bloodbending is the last thing I want to do. So, I very much hope that you won't do something that forces me to use it on you. It would be very unpleasant for us both."
"Mhm," Azula frowned, feeling conflicted about the entire matter. This really did change a lot. If she had to take Katara down in the end, she would have to be very fast and decisive about it. She could not allow Katara to retaliate, her bloodbending truly was like an instant win button, if she was given the chance to push it. "It seems that you have been given a rare gift, an opportunity that you have been squandering," she said a while later.
"An opportunity for what, Azula?" Katara asked simply.
"An opportunity to acquire power, to rule and to dominate!" Azula exclaimed. "Must I explain every obvious little thing to you?"
"It's not obvious to me," Katara shrugged. "I don't care about ruling or dominating anyone. I do not want to use this gift that would only push people away and make them look upon me with fear and loathing."
"How is that a bad thing? Fear is something through which you can conquer and rule," Azula snapped. "Not like I need something like your bloodbending, but if I had it on top of everything else that I already possess, nothing would stand in my way, not even the Avatar. I think it's pathetic that someone with such a gift would have nothing to their name, save for the clothes on their back."
"I have something more important than the power you aspire to grasp, Azula," Katara said, shaking her head ruefully. "I have powerful friends in high places, friends who would do anything for me, because they know I would do anything for them. And I have these friends not because of my bloodbending. On the contrary, if I embraced my bloodbending, I would surely lose their friendship. You misunderstand what strength is, Azula. True strength is to have such a cursed gift and not giving in to it, not making yourself a slave to it."
Azula did not respond right away, digesting what Katara had told her, trying to poke some holes in her argument, but irritatingly, even if what Katara had told her felt deeply wrong and went against everything she had been taught, Azula could not immediately find a logical counter to hit Katara with. "That doesn't make sense, and I still think you're a pathetic and cowardly weakling," in the end she had to settle for a rather childish insult which did not feel satisfying at all.
"Is that so?" annoyance flashed in Katara's sapphire blue eyes. "Let's examine what you have achieved with your gifts, shall we? After all, you're the prodigy here, the most skilled firebender of our age. So, what has all that gotten you, Azula? Four years behind the bars. Not a single friend who cared enough to visit you during all that time. I have nothing to my name? You have even less! If I'm the pathetic and cowardly weakling, what does that make you?"
"How… how dare you?" Azula felt blood draining from her face, violent pounding in her temples urging her to melt the flesh clean off from the waterbender's impertinent bones.
"Look deep inside yourself and for once face the truth, Azula. You know that I'm right," Katara refused to back down, glaring right back at the princess.
Azula took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down, something that did not come at all easy for her. Still, she did not want to experience the effects of Katara's bloodbending firsthand, so she forced herself to take several deep breaths, her anger slowly starting to dissipate and allowing her to process Katara's words rationally.
And Azula very much did not like what Katara's words made her face. Her father had entrusted her to reign in his absence, and what had she done? She still had no explanation for why she had acted the way she had done. Her father had hundreds of lackeys at his beck and call, helping him to run and administer the military powerhouse that was the Fire Nation. But what had she done? She had dismissed them all, because she had suspected treachery from every corner. Was this what Katara was getting at with her words? That as powerful as she was, she still needed to rely on others to get things done? That she needed to… trust others to do their job, and needed others to trust in her?
Azula did not like where these thoughts were leading her. They made her feel as if she was not infallible. Like she was capable of making mistakes, which surely was ridiculous. And yet… hadn't her brief reign as the Fire Lord been filled with irrational decisions and… mistakes?
"Azula?" she heard Katara's voice, laden with concern. Azula shook her head, dismissing the uncomfortable thoughts, noticing that Katara's hand was gently shaking her shoulder. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."
"What? Pfft, like anything you say could upset me," Azula said, her voice unusually hoarse as she pushed Katara's hand away.
"Well, I just hope that you understand why bloodbending is not something to be trifled with, and why it's so important that I don't get into habit of using it," Katara spoke softly.
"Whatever," Azula replied, looking anywhere but into Katara's piercing blue eyes. "I'd still use it if I had it."
"Then I'm glad you don't have it," Katara sighed. "For one, if you had bloodbending, I could not have stopped Aang from removing your bending altogether."
Azula did not reply to that and eventually Katara crawled over to her simple straw mat and began to settle in for the night, leaving the other girl sitting, deep in her thoughts. A few minutes later, Azula let out a sigh before extinguishing the oil lamp, then leaning back and settling into her own sleeping berth, already knowing that she would have trouble falling asleep, despite how exhausted she felt from the travails of the past two days.
"Speaking of removing my bending," Azula suddenly spoke up, making Katara shift on her straw mattress as she reared her head.
"I thought we were finally going to sleep," Katara sighed.
"Humor me, waterbender," Azula said insistently. "I'm going to ask you a question, and while you could lie… in fact, I'm more than certain that you're going to lie, I am simply curious about what sort of lie you will come up with."
"I'll do my best not to lie to you, Azula," Katara said earnestly. Azula almost believed her. "What's the question?"
"Why did you really speak up against removing my bending?" Azula asked. "You even went against your own boyfriend."
"Aang isn't my boyfriend, not anymore," Katara explained. "We broke up almost a year ago."
"Oh… then June was speaking the truth when she called you the Fire Lord's girlfriend?" Azula laughed. "I thought she was just trying to annoy you. Well, never mind then, I have my answer for why you're helping me."
"Oh, and what would that be, I wonder?" Katara asked, sounding a little irritated.
"Clearly, you're eager to jump my brother's bones, that's all there is to it," Azula snorted. "Agni, I thought you actually had some interesting and complicated motivation, but in the end, you're still so very transparent."
"My helping you has nothing to do with Zuko," Katara snapped back. "Well… that's not entirely true, part of the reason why I'm helping you is that I know how much your... difficulties are eating away at him, and I just want my friend to be happy. That's all Zuko and I are, very good friends who help one another with things like these."
"Please," Azula waved her off dismissively. "Nice try, but I see right through it. Perhaps you are still friends for now, but you want more. Don't bother denying it."
"I am free to pursue anyone I choose to, Azula, and I would not need your approval for it. If I was romantically interested in Zuko, I would have no trouble admitting it," Katara replied.
"Alright, let's say that I believe your little lies," Azula said. "If you're not using helping me to get closer to Zuko, what other motivation do you have then? Just let that bald freak take away my bending. I would understand that more than I can understand what you're trying to achieve now."
"I couldn't go through with it, I knew that as soon as I saw you in that cell," Katara replied softly. "I'm going to tell you something that will probably annoy you, but you need to hear it. During the war, I wasn't really interested in anything that had to do with you, other than how to avoid coming across you, or how to take you down when we faced each other. But after the war, when we spent time in the Fire Nation as a group, visiting Zuko, I learned more and more details about his childhood... and that meant learning about your childhood as well. I know that there's an angry retort of 'you don't know a single thing about me, dirty water peasant' on your tongue already, but Azula... I actually do know. I know enough about you to understand what losing your bending would do to you, princess. You know what I'm talking about, don't you?"
"I would rather die than lose my bending," Azula said, swallowing heavily.
"I could not stand idly and abide by a decision that turned a young woman into a living corpse," Katara continued. "To me, that is the definition of a cruel and unusual punishment."
"An interesting theory, but I remain unconvinced. I still think you're only doing this to get into Zuko's pants," Azula spoke up a while later, making Katara sigh deeply. "Well, I should at least commend you on your tastes having improved. Zuko might be a brooding crybaby at times, but at least he's more interesting than Blandy the Avatar. How could you date someone with the personality equal to a bowl of oatmeal for so long?"
Katara let out an amused snort despite herself, but declined to comment any further. "I think it's about time we finally got some shuteye," she said decisively. Still, a few minutes later, Azula could distinctively hear the sounds of Katara trying not to snicker, but failing miserably. "Damn you, princess!" the waterbender finally burst into giggles.
"What did I do?" Azula asked, wondering if Katara had finally lost her marbles.
"What did you do?" Katara choked out. "I'm trying to sleep here, but every time I close my eyes, I get a mental image of Aang with a bowl of oatmeal for his head!"
Despite herself, Azula could not stop from bursting into chuckles as well. Sleep would have to wait a while longer.