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Ignition and A Slow Death

Elliot got up early Saturday. Called Kathleen, who was more than excited to help him get his apartment in order. She was the only one who he confided in, except for Fin, about seeing a therapist so he told her it was part of his therapy. Which wasn't a lie, but he omitted the biggest part of why he finally decided to upgrade his living situation. He did think about telling her about Olivia while they were out. Kathleen was close with her, but the words to start that conversation were lost on him. He didn't want to risk causing more pain. What if she wasn't ready? He decided against it in the end, but knew when the time came, she would be the first.

"Thanks honey." He said to Kathleen, pulling her into his arms.

"Of course, Dad. You know I'm always here for you…" she said tightening her grip.

He felt tears prick at his eyes. She looked at him, kissed him on the cheek and looked around one more time.

"This place looks pretty good, if I do say so." She said sounding proud of herself.

"It's great Kathleen. Really."

She smiled at her Dad, grabbed her purse and turned back as she opened the door. She took a deep breath and said "She's gonna love it Dad. Just don't take all the credit for it ok?"

His mouth fell open a little. What did she just say?

"Kathleen I…" he stumbled feeling a tightness in his stomach.

"It's ok Dad… I just want you to be happy. You're good for each other." She made strong Stabler eye contact with her Dad, letting him know she really was ok with it. He softly smiled at her, stunned, and she smiled back as she shut his door.

He was standing there still speechless. When did she become so… grown up? Ok he thought. That was a big step, and a small weight lifted. He wasn't sure how the rest of his children were going to react, but he knew Kathleen would let him be the one to tell the rest of them.

He looked at his watch. It was almost four. He still needed to put away a few things, take out the trash, shower, change. He felt his nerves set in a little. This was a big deal. His first date since… Kathy. He felt guilt and grief tug at him.

He had dated a little when he was separated from her both times, but he didn't really count it as dating. And then there was Dani Beck…. He chewed on his lip remembering that mess. He really wanted Olivia back then. It was always Olivia. Even when he was the most "married" and they were seemingly happy, his heart and mind always tugged him towards Olivia. He was ashamed to admit it, but it was his dark little secret.

But Olivia had run from him. All the way to Oregon. He did the same thing to her, but he had to run all the way to Italy to try to pretend he could live his life without her. Ten years and a whole ocean proved that he couldn't. He felt a pang of hurt, thinking about the pain he caused Olivia. The pain he caused Kathy… That was his cross to bear.

His mind went back to Beck. She really was just filling a void. The void his broken marriage left, the void his failures as a husband, and father left. The void Olivia left…. a void that couldn't be filled by anyone but her. Eventually Olivia came back to him. It was different, but she came back. Honestly it only made him love her more, and then Eli happened.

There always seemed to be something standing in his way. He loved Eli, and of course never wished he wasn't born. But it meant doing the right thing. He always did the right thing. Whether or not it was the right thing for him, he did the right thing for his family.

There was also something else…. Something he hadn't told anyone. Angela Wheatley. His brain replayed the events of that night. Nope, he thought, he wasn't going down that road. He decided after it happened it wasn't right, it felt wrong. He was still lost and confused then. After it came out she was the one who ordered the hit on Kathy he decided to finally listen to his children and Liv and get help.

He let the guilt and weight of everything wash over him a little, and then closed his eyes and concentrated on his breathing. Olivia made her way into his thoughts then. He was taking a big step, and it felt… good. He then let that feeling wash over him, and the guilt started to ease. This was also his first date with her. Even though he felt like he'd known her all his life it still was their first official date. This was good. This was right. He knew deep down in his gut, in his soul, this was right.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia looked at her clock. It was almost six thirty. She had spent the day with Noah, finished up some errands and then took Noah over to his slumber party for the night. It had taken her almost an hour of digging through her closet to find the right thing to wear for this date. Nothing seemed to be making the cut. Just when she was about to give up and run out to a store, she found a black dress buried in the back.

It was cut just below mid-thigh, form fitting, with a low scoop neckline and short sleeves. The back had a gold zipper with small cut outs by her shoulder blades. It was definitely sexy and dangerous. Probably why it ended up in the back of her closet. Last time she wore it, she had a suit jacket over it. This time, there wasn't going to be a suit jacket. Let him eat his heart out a little she thought.

She slipped on a pair of leopard print Louboutin's and checked her hair and grabbed her purse.

She took another quick look in her mirror as she made her way out her door. She took a deep breath and tried to steel her nerves. There was no going back now she thought and then she was on her way.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot's phone buzzed.

Downstairs

He smiled, grabbed his jacket and headed out. He rolled his neck and shoulders in the elevator ride down, still running his mind over his check list from earlier making sure everything was going to be just right. He felt the elevator stop and looked up just as the doors started to open.

His mouth ran dry at the sight before him.

She was leaning against a pillar, one hand on her hip. His eyes raked down her body in a skintight black fitted dress that left not much to the imagination.

He swallowed hard. It took every ounce of strength he had to not run to her and drag her into the elevator and take her upstairs. He carefully started to make his way to her. She stood there biting her lip, pure heat in her eyes. He was never going to make it through this date. She was going to be the death of him. And what a way to go he thought.

He finally made his way over to her. He took his time dragging his eyes back up to hers, but something caught his attention before he got there. She was wearing a single gold necklace and a medallion was hanging from it, nestled right above her cleavage.

His heart swelled in his chest, and all of a sudden, he felt like the wind was knocked out of him. She was wearing his Semper Fi medallion he had left her. She still had it after all these years. He wouldn't have blamed her for getting rid of it. But she hadn't. And now it was around her neck.

"El…" she said, slightly worried. "You ok?"

He met her eyes, and she saw the tears starting to form there. He nodded yes, because there were no words. Nothing he could say could demonstration his feelings at the moment. He brought his hands to her face and softly kissed her. It was slow and searing and heavy.

He was making her legs turn to jelly. He ended the kiss and his hands slid down her neck, one stopped and touched the medallion, and the other went down her shoulder, down her arm, to her hand and interlocked his fingers with hers. His eyes met hers again. Taking a shaky breath in he said, "I don't deserve you…"

Feeling the heaviness of what just happened between them, she placed her other hand on the one touching her necklace and whispered, "Well I don't know what I did to deserve you… so maybe it's fate…" she said and tried to lighten the moment with a slight smile.

He softened his gaze and smiled back. His fingers left the medallion and traced up to her collar bone and then his thumb came up to her jaw, and she leaned her head into his hand as her eyes closed.

She took in the breath she was holding and opened her eyes to him. His were crystal clear and as blue as the sea.

"Fate…" he said with deep commitment layered in his voice.

Olivia could feel herself starting to melt under his gaze. Things were getting intense and overwhelming. She needed a break from the heaviness otherwise she might crumble.

"What's a girl got to do to get a meal around here?" she questioned trying to lighten the mood.

He laughed at her, a big smile spreading across his face. He understood. It was becoming overwhelming for him too.

"Well wearing that dress is a good start, "he chuckled. "But where do you keep your gun?" he questioned, looking her up and down.

"Wouldn't you like to know…" she said and raised an eyebrow. His lips curled up and he eyed her again.

"I might need to frisk you… Captain…" he said, smiling at the obvious inuendo as they began to walk to the door still hand in hand. She turned her head to him and leaned in, her lips close to his ear.

"I'm counting on it…" she whispered, using the same words he whispered to her before the danced at Fin's wedding.

He took a sharp inhale and cleared his throat. He was right. She was going to be the death of him.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

They walked hand in hand on the street in New York. The night was balmy, and it was finally starting to warm up. The restaurant was only two blocks down and a block over. He specifically picked this restaurant for a few reasons. One because it was close, and two because it was one of those hidden gems. Private without being obscure, and just busy enough that you knew it was good.

He couldn't keep his eyes off her as they walked. How high were those heels he thought? She walked in them like she was born to walk in them. They accented her lean leg muscles. Her caramel skin was glistening under the moonlight. Her hips swaying as she walked. Everything about her was beautiful and damn sexy. Every line, every curve was… perfect he thought.

She could feel his eyes on her as they walked, and she couldn't keep the smile from her lips. He led her around the corner, and she took the chance to look at him now. His dark grey pants and jacket fit him perfectly. He turned to open the door to the restaurant for her, and as she entered her eyes looked down at the black button-down shirt. Again, like at the wedding, he had left it open.

Everything about him oozed sex. The way he walked, the way he held himself. His smoldering eyes and hard jaw line. All those muscles underneath his clothes. Olivia moaned internally craving to feel those muscles around her. Her mind and body remembering the feeling of how easily he grabbed her and lifted her onto her kitchen counter.

He placed his hand on the small of her back and he felt her tremble. He smiled to himself, glad to know he was having a physical effect on her, because the effect she was having on him was on the verge of making him look like a love-struck teenager unable to control himself.

The hostess seated them in a corner booth just big enough for two. She slid in first, and Elliot was right behind her. He put his arm around her waist as he closed in on her and leaned in to kiss her jawline. Olivia blushed and looked up at the hostess, taking the menus from her as Elliot's other hand slid across her thigh.

"Your waiter will be right with you." The young girl said, eyes wide and smiling at Olivia.

"Thanks." She said as the girl walked away.

Olivia lifted her chin a little to give him better access for a second before she turned to him remembering where they were.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were looking for my gun…" she said, feeling a little breathless.

He snickered, "I just can't help myself…" he said and put a kiss on her neck, "You're so damn…" and he kissed under her ear, "…delicious…" he whispered in her ear before he took her earlobe in his mouth.

She whimpered feeling her insides turn to jelly. As his mouth was working on her ear, the hand on her thigh slipped to the inside of her thigh and gripped her flesh there. Every part of her body was screaming. Her skin was on fire, and she was getting lightheaded.

If she didn't stop him now, she just might come right here in this booth… but his hand… ugh his hand she thought… and his lips… his tongue…. Her head was spinning, and she was losing control.

She wanted to spread her legs a little, to urge him to go farther up with his hand and her instinct to do so almost took over until she heard something.

"AHEM…."

Olivia's eyes shot open. Standing at their table was their waiter, with a pretty big grin across his face. They both looked up at the younger man and tried to compose themselves.

"Good evening… a very good evening by the looks of things. My name is Jason, and I'll be your waiter tonight. Can I start you off with anything to drink?

"We will have a bottle of Cab… Thanks." Elliot said, a little annoyed that this guy interrupted him.

"Oookk.. coming right up." Jason said and left to get their wine.

They both looked at each other. "Well that was slightly embarrassing." Olivia said. She smiled at Elliot, a slight flush in her cheeks. He loved seeing her blush. Especially when he was the cause of it.

She opened the menu and started looking, biting her bottom lip as she perused her options.

Elliot watched her. He still couldn't believe they were at this point. He remembered a time when all he had was his fantasies and self loathing. She had been there for him at his best and at his absolute worst. Always a rock. His touchstone.

"Listen Stabler…you better decide what you want to eat because what you're looking at isn't on the menu… until later..." she said with a smirk.

He huffed out a laugh. "But what if I want my desert first?"

She tapped the menu and when he looked down at it, she moved her lips to his ear and whispered, "Good things come to those who wait…" and she slid her tongue in his ear.

His mind exploded. Electricity jolted him straight from her tongue down to the tip of his cock. All he could think about was her tongue and how it would feel on other parts of his body.

"Hmmm…" she moaned in her throat as she kissed his cheek and then went back to looking at her menu like nothing had happened.

He ran his hand down his face and swallowed hard. A slow death it is.

The waiter came back with their wine. He popped the cork and poured them each a glass. As he was handing one to Olivia, Elliot noticed the waiter smiling at Olivia and then his eyes dropped, and he lingered on her breasts.

Elliots eyebrows furrowed. He felt a little anger bubble inside him.

"That's a beautiful necklace you have on." He said to her.

Olivia looked up at him, and he winked at her. Oh no… she thought, this isn't going to end well…

"Thank you." She said.

She could feel Elliot's presence change next to her without even looking at him. His muscles stiffened and a different kind of heat radiated off him. He chuckled and said, "Look Jamie, was it?"

"Jason." He corrected Elliot with a smile in Olivia's direction.

"Jason… when ever your done making a fool of yourself… we'd like to order." He said flatly.

"Of course, sir." The waiter said, with slight arrogance in his voice. "We have a special cedar plank salmon that I'd bet you would like." He said, once again looking straight at Olivia and then down to her breasts.

Olivia saw Elliot clench his jaw and the expression leave his face. Uh oh… that was his patented in two seconds I'm going to make you wish you were dead look. Time to diffuse this she thought.

She squeezed his knee, and then turned to him, "I don't know babe… what do you think?" she said in her best clingy girlfriend voice. "You know what I like…" she said suggestively and then slid her other hand up to where his shirt was open slowly rubbing the skin there.

"You always know what I like… and how I like it." She said seductlively. She kissed him then, her hands sliding up to pull him by his neck as his arms wrapped themselves around her waist. She made sure to open her mouth and slip her tongue in his mouth making sure it was obvious. She hoped this was enough to send the waiter the message and let them enjoy their evening.

They ended their kiss and Elliot turned to look at the waiter, who was now staring at the table, and said, "We'll both have the sirloin, medium well." And he smiled at Jason while Olivia was still pressed up to him, peppering his neck and jaw with kisses.

"I'll put that right in for you." He said flatly and left quickly making no eye contact.

He heard her throaty laugh in his ear. And he then laughed with her. "Well, that was fun." Olivia said.

"Yea, it was… babe." Elliot said grinning.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Their food came and the waiter was quick to tell them to enjoy their meal and attended to other tables. They laughed and ate reminiscing of old stories. They talked about his children, and what they were up to. She told him about Noah and the details of how she came to adopt him. His eyes were sparkling while she talked about Noah. She wasn't sure if it was because he was happy for her, finally becoming a mom, or maybe because he now knows the details, and there isn't a father in the picture. Maybe it was a little of both, she thought.

It had been such a nice evening. Even with the waiter and his advances, this was a great date. Everything was so easy between them. Olivia knew it wasn't going to be all sunshine and rainbows, but this date cemented in her mind that this was going to work. She was going to try her hardest to keep this. To keep him. It was going to be tough. There was still a lot they hadn't talked about, and everything between them was heavy and intense, but she was done running from that. She was done running from him.

She took a last sip of her wine and moved into Elliot as he finished his last bite. His arm went around her and pulled her close. Her hand found its way onto his thigh. As much as she was enjoying herself, she was ready for dessert.

"El…" she said, and her hand slid further up his thigh. She crossed her legs towards him and began rubbing them together a little. He felt the hair on the back of his neck stand on end and a shiver down his spine.

"I'm ready for dessert…" she said looking at his lips. Then she looked into his eyes and said, "Take me home El…"