Reality-4, New York City
"Hahahahaha!" cackled the Jester, "At long last, justice is served!"
A lanky woman in a jester costume stood beside an equally lanky man wearing white and pink spandex in the center of the warehouse. They stood on either side of a chair to which a chubby, soft-faced man was tied. A mounted camera stood opposite him live streaming the footage.
"You won't scare me!" said Foggy, nervously but defiantly, "I don't care what you do."
"Oh, but we have a feeling you will soon, Mr. District Attorney," grinned the man in white, "When we live stream you as you beg for us to stop!"
Foggy grimaced. He didn't actually have a great amount of confidence in his pain tolerance.
"I knew you stooped low, Screwball, but snuff films?" came a voice from the rafters, "Yeesh!"
Screwball and Jester looked up to see two spandex clad figures crouched on a rafter. Spider-Woman was there along with Jewel, who wore a white uniform with blue and pink highlights and a large purple wig.
"Spider-Woman!" spat Jester, "We can't let her escape!"
Jester pulled out a brightly colored handgun from the back of her pants and began firing it up at the two vigilantes. The two women leapt away to dodge the shots. Spider-Woman fired a web and swung downward, kicking Screwball with both legs and sending him flying into his own camera equipment, smashing it.
"Nice one!" shouted Jewel as she landed on the ground.
"Meddling pests!" yelled Jester from behind Jewel, gun drawn, "I'm just about done with you lot!"
Jewel stood up and turned around, staring down the Jester. She had both hands on the gun and was pointing it straight at Jewel's chest. The barrel of the gun was visibly trembling.
"Come on, Jester," sighed Jewel, "You don't want to-"
Bang!
"Ow…" muttered Jewel, plucking the bullet from her chest. The bullet had failed to pierce her skin, but that would leave a bruise.
"I guess you do want to," shrugged Jewel.
"No, no, no, wait-!" pleaded Jester, but Jewel punched her in the side of the head and knocked her out cold.
"Thank you!" shouted Foggy with relief, "Thank you both!"
Spider-Woman and Jewel both turned to look at Foggy. As District Attorney, he had made both of their lives difficult in the past. Vigilantes always butted heads with lawyers over logistics and Spider-Woman had been actively pursued by law enforcement for some time.
"...think one of you could untie me?" he asked nervously.
The police arrived some time later. They gathered the two criminals for arrest and got Foggy's account of what happened as Spider-Woman and Jewel silently watched from the roof of the warehouse next door.
"We've got to do these team-ups more often," smiled Jewel, "We kick butt."
"Yeah," said Spider-Woman, "We can make it, like, a regular thing."
"God, when was the last time we did this?" asked Jewel, "Outside of Avengers stuff, I mean."
"I think it might have been Silver Sable."
"No!" protested Jewel in shock, "That long ago? That's when we met!"
"I know."
"You sure we haven't teamed up since then?"
"Only for Avengers stuff."
"Wow…"
Spider-Woman and Jewel watched the police cars and ambulance drive off with their new passengers. The area around the warehouses slowly returned to silence. Looking up at the stars, Spider-Woman began to reminisce about the time she and Jewel had met.
Several years ago…
Spider-Woman swung from building to building, flipping and twisting through the air for fun as she did. She listened to the occasional shocked cheer of approval as well as the frequent insults and harassment from the pedestrians below. She hadn't even had her powers for a year yet, but her patrols were already starting to feel bogged down by the negative press.
That didn't matter to Spider-Woman. What mattered was that with her powers, she could do something that others never could. She could really protect this city. She would do that at all costs, no matter how the public saw her. Then Spider-Woman heard a loud bang! followed by the screams of a frightened crowd.
That's my cue.
Spider-Woman swung down in the direction of the noise. There was a group of mercenaries clad in silver surrounding an armored truck. It had stopped at an intersection, but was now completely surrounded and trapped. Spider-Woman swung down toward the mercenaries.
"An armored car robbery?" scoffed Spider-Woman, "You must be new in town. You know us supers stop these things all the time, right?"
"-and as luck would have it," chimed in another voice, "You've run into two of them!"
A muscular woman in a white spandex outfit with cyan and pink highlights along with a full head of pink hair slowly descended down in front of the armored truck. Spider-Woman recognized her: it was Jewel, a vigilante who had been around for even less time than Spider-Woman.
"What are you waiting for!?" demanded the mercenary in the most high-tech combat suit, "The truck's not going to rob itself!"
One of the mercenaries brought out a small explosive and attached it to the back of the truck. Spider-Woman fired a web at his back and flung him into a nearby building. She got ready to fire another web when her spider sense went off. She leapt to the side and dodged a canister headed right at her. It bounced off the side of the truck, landed at her feet, and began to emit a white gas.
"Get her now!" shouted the leader.
Spider-Woman heard gunfire, but got no reading from her spider sense. That was bad. She went to sprint away from the gas, but quickly realized that her leg strength wasn't what it was before. Her powers were gone. She had no way to defend herself. Then Spider-Woman remembered something.
"The explosive!" she shouted, hoping Jewel would hear, "It's still active!"
Spider-Woman ducked to the ground as she heard more gunfire ricocheting around. Without her spider-sense, those bullets suddenly posed a much greater threat to her. She rolled to the side and made her way under the armored truck, where the white gas obscured her enough to keep her hidden.
The gas slowly began to dissipate as Spider-Woman caught sight of the man with the explosive from earlier. He was still lying on the ground from Spider-Woman's attack, explosive in his hand and slowly counting down from 15. Spider-Woman saw Jewel rush up beside them, grab the explosive, and attempt to suppress it with her hands.
No! realized Spider-Woman, With this gas...!
Jewel's powers might have been able to contain the explosion under normal circumstances, but if this gas took Spider-Woman's powers away it probably did the same to Jewel. The explosion would kill her.
Luckily, Spider-Woman still had fully functioning web shooters. She rushed out from under the truck, fired a strand of web at the explosive in Jewel's hands, and flung it upward into the air. It exploded harmlessly in a brilliant burst of red and orange flame.
Spider-Woman heard motorcycles revving. She turned around to see that the armored truck had been forced open in the confusion. It's cargo was now gone. The mercenaries were aboard their matching motorcycles each with large racks of cash hooked onto the back. They sped off, leaving only Spider-Woman, Jewel, the one defeated mercenary, and the empty armored truck.
Spider-Woman fired a web onto a nearby building. Even without her powers, she was more interested in web swinging that dealing with that embarrassing failure any more than she had to.
"Hey, wait-!" called out Jewel as Spider-Woman swung away.
Spider-Woman's powers were back within the hour. She didn't know what that gas was, but it's effects were mercifully temporary. Jewel's powers had also evidently returned, as Spider-Woman watched her leap from building to building, awkwardly gliding when necessary to adjust her course. She was really not very good at flying.
Spider-Woman didn't know what to make of Jewel. They had barely gotten a chance to talk during the incident, so Spider-Woman wanted to compare notes. Before that, though, she wanted to know more about her.
Spider-Woman followed her fellow white spandex-clad vigilante all the way to Hell's Kitchen, avoiding detection the whole time. Spider-Woman narrowed Jewel's residence down to a single building when she saw her enter the roof of an apartment complex while still in costume.
Hm… considered Spider-Woman, Let's do this Rear Window style.
Spider-Woman made her way onto the building opposite the apartment complex. She had a good look at all of the windows, most of which were close or had the lights off. There were a few exceptions though: a student typing away at his computer, a man cleaning his apartment, and a brown-haired woman that looked suspiciously familiar. That had to be her. Now all Spider-Woman needed was a name.
Changing out of her Spider-Woman outfit behind a billboard, Gwen slowly made her way down to the street and into the apartment complex. Based on her previous perspective of the building she managed to figure out the room number. When she punched it into the keypad at the front of the complex, it displayed the name that could be called to reach that room: Jessica Jones.
Ha! thought Gwen, Gotcha!
Jessica fumbled through her jacket pockets, finally finding her keys. She unlocked her apartment door and walked in. She clicked on the light.
"Jesus!" cried Jessica.
"Hello Jewel," said Spider-Woman smugly.
"Did you break into my home!?"
"Your window was unlocked," said Spider-Woman, "Now, you and I have to talk."
"Oh do we?" responded Jessica, equally smug, "Is that so, Gwendolyn Stacy?"
"How did you-?"
"Daughter of Captain George Stacy of the NYPD," continued Jessica, "Drummer for the Mary Janes. Biochem undergrad major at Empire State University?"
Spider-Woman just stared back in disbelief.
"It wasn't hard to figure out," said Jessica, "The first dozen cases or so that you were involved with also involved your father. Once I met you in person and was able to approximate your age I figured it had to be you. Now it's your turn: how did you find out who I was?"
"I followed you home last night."
"...classy."
"Listen," dismissed Spider-Woman, "that's not important now! What's important is how we stop those biker mercenaries."
"You mean Silver Sable and the Wild Pack?"
"The who now?"
Jessica rolled her eyes and walked over to the desk in the room, pulling out her laptop and pulling up her research. Silver Sable and her team were well known mercenaries that went silent not long after superheroes started to show up. Their equipment was unmistakably the same though. It was them.
"I guess they got wise to us capes stopping robberies," said Jessica, "So they got their hands on that gas, whatever it is."
"So it did neutralize your powers too?" clarified Spider-Woman.
"Sure did," said Jessica, "I noticed your webs still worked though. Are they some kind of weapon?"
"Sort of," said Spider-Woman, rolling up her sleeve to show Jessica the web shooter.
"You make that yourself?"
"Yeah," said Spider-Woman, "Like you said, biochem major."
"Wait a minute," realized Jessica, "That's right. You must know something about how to counteract the chemicals in that gas! "
"Uh… Maybe," considered Spider-Woman, "I'd have to get a sample to even start to figure that out."
"So next time we see them," said Jessica, "We bring something that can get a sample of that gas."
"Easier said than done," said Spider-Woman, "I mean I think I have a device that would work but-"
Spider-Woman looked at the door seconds before they heard a key go into the lock and turn it. A blonde woman in a red pantsuit entered a second later, freezing to stare up at Spider-Woman.
"Uh…" muttered Spider-Woman, "I'm… A cosplayer…"
"It's okay," assured Jessica, "She knows about the whole Jewel thing. Trish, meet Spider-Woman. Spider-Woman, meet my friend Trish Walker."
"Practically sisters," threw in Trish.
"From Trish Talk?" asked Spider-Woman.
"Yes!" beamed Trish, rushing in, "Yes, oh my God! You're really Spider-Woman!"
"Um, yes."
"I have got to have you on my show!" continued Trish, "It'll be great for your reputation. You can clear your name and everything!"
"Does your show normally have wanted felons as guests?" asked Spider-Woman.
The police had not taken kindly to Spider-Woman's arrival in New York City. Not only did she routinely make them look bad, but she had exposed a number of high ranking officers for abuse of power. It would be years before she was recognized as a legitimate vigilante.
"Good point," considered Trish.
"Do you mind giving us some space?" requested Spider-Woman, "We're kind of in the middle of something."
"Sure, sure," agreed Trish tentatively, "but first, tell me about your costume design? Like, that hood. What's its function?"
"Trish…" sighed Jessica angrily.
"Right, sorry!" apologized Trish, running into another room.
"If you're lucky she'll only invite you onto her show a dozen more times," scoffed Jessica.
"So you have super strength?" asked Spider-Woman.
"Enough to lift a dump truck over my head. Bulletproof too."
"And you can fly?"
"Arguably."
Spider-Woman and Jewel were sitting on the roof of a building, listening in on a police scanner for any sign of Silver Sable and her Wild Pack. They had been waiting for a few hours now.
"What's your deal?" asked Jewel, "You're strong too, you've got those web shooters, you can stick to walls…"
"Plus enhanced reflexes and a spider sense that warns me of danger."
"How'd you get yours?"
"Genetically modified spider bite," said Spider-Woman casually, "You?"
"Radioactive waste dump," said Jewel, "I was just trying to get this kid out of the way and…"
"Did you?"
"Did I what?"
"Did you get the kid out of the way?"
"Yeah," said Jewel, "I think I saved him. That feeling, that knowledge that I had helped someone out by risking my life, changed my life more than the powers. It's why I do the whole vigilante gig."
"Hm," pondered Spider-Woman.
"What about you?" asked Jewel, "Why do you do this?"
Spider-Woman paused and looked at her feet for a moment. Then she took a deep breath and began to speak.
"At first it just seemed like the logical next step from getting superpowers," said Spider-Woman, "I didn't think much of it, I just had fun with it. Then… You remember when I fought that giant spider?"
"Of course," said Jewel, "It was all over the news."
"Well, he was once my best friend."
"...ouch."
"Yeah…" sighed Spider-Woman sadly, "I do this because I know firsthand what it looks like to fail to save someone. I never want that to happen again."
"...you know," said Jewel after a moment, "it probably will happen again. It's part of the job, Gwen."
"Yeah," nodded Spider-Woman, "Yeah, I know."
KRRZT
"10-35," said a voice on the scanner, "10-35. It's those motorists again. They're heading north on Park Avenue."
"That's our cue," said Spider-Woman, standing up.
Spider-Woman fired a web and swung off in the direction of the chase. Jewel leapt from rooftop to rooftop following her. Within minutes they had caught up with the mercenaries, who were weaving in and out of traffic as they made their way toward another armored car.
"Remember the plan!" shouted Spider-Woman.
"Right!" acknowledged Jewel.
Spider-Woman swung down and right into one of the mercenaries, clotheslining her off the motorcycle and carrying her away in the rest of the swing. Spider-Woman knocked the woman out with a punch and returned her attention to the others.
"Cape at 8 o'clock!" shouted the leader.
Another one pulled out a large gun and fired a canister at Spider-Woman, who instinctively dodged it and leapt high into the air.
Damnit, Gwen! she thought to herself, You're never going to get a sample that way!
Spider-Woman readied the gas collector to capture the smog, watching the white cloud form on the ground below her where she had been. As she reached the apex of her jump, she prepared to collect the gas upon her landing and make her getaway as quickly as possible. That's when her spider sense warned her that that wasn't an option.
A mercenary had fired another canister directly at Spider-Woman in the air. Panicking, Spider-Woman used one arm to web a building and the other to ready the gas collector. She let out a cough as the canister struck her in the gut before releasing the gas. She could have dodged it, but she needed the gas to be as close to her as possible to collect it.
Spider-Woman swung out of the gas on a web, certain she had now lost her powers. Looking down two stories below her, she was starting to regret the midair nature of this plan. Spider-Woman leapt off the web at the end of the swing and fired another. Without her enhanced reflexes though, she missed the building entirely.
Oh no… realized Spider-Woman as she began to feel herself fall.
"Got you!"
Spider-Woman let out a grunt as she felt someone hit her hard from behind. It was Jewel. She had soared up to Spider-Woman in the air and attempted to grab her. Unfortunately, Jewel failed to actually catch her and Spider-Woman continued to fall. Jewel grabbed at the first thing she could, latching onto the back of Spider-Woman's spandex pants at the last second.
"Ah!" croaked Spider-Woman indignantly.
"Hold on!" shouted Jewel nervously.
"To what!?" cried Spider-Woman.
Jewel strained to keep herself flying straight while clutching onto her fellow vigilante's pants as tightly as she could. Spider-Woman did her best to keep from flailing in shock and discomfort as her pants were roughly yanked further and further up her butt. The unstable flight took them around a corner into an alleyway, where they quickly started to nosedive.
"Brace for impact!" shouted Jewel.
There was a loud crash as the two dove right into a dumpster, sending bits of garbage flying everywhere.
"A mega wedgie and shoving me in the garbage," groaned Spider-Woman, "You could give even my worst bullies a run for their money."
"I did the best I could," grunted Jewel, "At least you're alive. Did you get the sample?"
Spider-Woman held up the small gas container filled with the white fog. She used her other hand to give a weak thumbs up. Jewel smiled with relief.
Several days later…
"And you're sure this will work?" clarified Jewel.
"Nope."
"Great."
"We've gotta try something, right?" said Spider-Woman.
Spider-Woman and Jewel were perched on the edge of a building watching Silver Sable and her Wild Pack once again making their way to an armored car. Spider-Woman handed Jewel a pill. Then she prepared one of her own.
Spider-Woman had taken the gas to her college chemlab to look into it. She was able to confirm that the active ingredient was a drug called setcinzen. Initially used to treat migraines, it had recently been discovered to have a depowering effect on superhumans.
So Spider-Woman had stolen some susmalan from a pharmacy. Susmalan was often prescribed alongside setcinzen to counteract the side effects. Spider-Woman hoped that would include the depowerment.
The two women took their pills and leapt off the building. Spider-Woman swung down and kicked one of the mercenaries off his bike, webbing onto another as she swung by and flinging him off as well.
Jewel landed right in front of their leader, Silver Sable. Though her face was obscured by a mask, the woman's advanced combat armor made her stick out from the others. She skidded to a stop as Jewel cut her off.
"Hit her, now!" shouted Silver.
One of the other mercenaries fired a canister right at Jewel. The next thing Spider-Woman knew Jewel was gone in the cloud of white fog. Silver and several other mercenaries drew weapons and fired into the fog. Spider-Woman tensed in anticipation. If her plan didn't work, Jewel was swiss cheese by now. Everyone stared at the fog as it slowly began to clear away.
The canister flew back out of the cloud at high speed, striking Silver in the head and knocking her out. The fog cleared to reveal Jewel standing there confidently, unharmed. The other mercenaries panicked and tried to get away, but Jewel and Spider-Woman made quick work of them. Within minutes the whole gang was suspended upside down from a lamppost in a wad of webbing.
Later, Spider-Woman and Jewel watched as the police arrived to apprehend the criminals. Jewel and Spider-Woman took satisfaction in the indignant look on Silver's face when the police finally removed her mask.
"Well," said Jewel, "That went well."
"Yup," said Spider-Woman, "There's just one more thing to take care of."
"Yeah? What's that-? Eeeooooo!"
Spider-Woman had pulled back the waistband of Jewel's spandex pants, grabbed the pink boy shorts underneath, and yanked up with her full spider strength. Jewel clutched the edge of the building so hard her fingers cracked the cement. Spider-Woman let the waistband snap back and looked proudly at the bunched up fabric sticking out of Jewel's pants.
"Er…. What…!?" grunted Jewel, shoving both hands down her pants to fix the wedgie, "...was that for!?"
"The wedgie you gave me the other day!" shouted Spider-Woman indignantly.
"That was an accident!"
"Tell that to my rear end!"
Jewel made a grab at Spider-Woman, but she leapt backward out of range.
"Hey!" shouted Spider-Woman, "I took it easy on you! You carried me like two city blocks!"
"TO SAVE YOU!"
Spider-Woman was already swinging away. Jewel gave chase, leaping from building to building in pursuit
Today…
"We've both come a long way since then," chuckled Spider-Woman, "The Avengers, Latveria, the Goblin…"
"Yeah," nodded Jewel.
"You're right," nodded Spider-Woman, "We kick butt together. My spider sense has even stopped registering you as a threat."
"Really?"
"Yeah," said Spider-Woman, looking up at the sky, "That's a big deal, you know. Spider sense is like the ultimate fight-or-flight mechanism. For it to recognize a stimulant as harmless they have to really- YEOWCH!"
"Ha!" cackled Jewel, "Too bad your spider sense didn't warn you about that!"
Spider-Woman's blue briefs sat all bunched up at the back of her pants, having been hiked up with all of Jewel's super strength. Spider-Woman slowly stood up, grabbed the seat of her spandex, and began digging the cotton out. Jewel snickered.
"Oh, so that's how this is going to be?" smiled Spider-Woman confidently under her mask, "You're on, sister!"
Spider-Woman spun around and tackled Jewel to the ground. The two women wrestled, rolling around as both tried to reach behind the other for a grip on the other's underwear. Soon the two were interlocked, practically hugging each other as they both tugged up on the elastic as hard as they could, digging the underwear in deeper and deeper.
"...what are you two doing?"
Spider-Woman and Jewel leapt away from each other, meekly looking up at the woman who had joined them on the roof. It was none other than Captain America herself, hands on her hips as she eyed the two women and their bunched up undies.
"Nothing," offered Jewel quietly, "Just goofing around."
Spider-Woman blushed as she tried to subtly readjust her pants.
"...very well," said Captain America, "If you're both through, Octavius has made a threat to take over the city. The other Avengers are back at Saber planning the response as we speak."
"Got it!" said Spider-Woman, finally dewedged and back on her feet.
The three women left together, ready to tackle any challenge this reality had to throw at them.