p data-p-id="6e433bfab1e7e35d06f8796f32e8a828"Everything was perfect! I proposed to Phillipa, Pippa, Pip Squeaks, Pipsy, the love of my life. How I love seeing that face, that beautiful face, the one that I can say is the most perfect thing in this universe. She said yes and I could never forget that face and that feeling when she said that. I'm the luckiest man on Earth./p
p data-p-id="ddca9a4a9754593cda4196258bb1d530"We got married and I was so happy./p
p data-p-id="ca3a957987d980cb8ea7fa474f0dec18"A month into it I was content./p
p data-p-id="cb31a491d7abfc8bfa6fcae327e98cfe"3 months in. I made the worst mistake. I cheated on Pippa, with somebody I met in a bar. I wasn't in my right mind when I did that. At least once a week we would meet up and pleasure ourselves. Pippa didn't know anything about it./p
p data-p-id="c018a2ca45065e3334fa0701df216fc1"When I came home late she would be sitting on the couch waiting for me. She would smile her innocent smile and ask, "How's your day love?" Every single time. Even if it's late at night and she was wasting her sleeping time just waiting for me. She did that not knowing anything and was just being a wife that loves her husband./p
p data-p-id="2eab77633a7c13cc6723d0b3f36887ed""Lin, I have something to tell you," Pippa said groggily. "Yes, what is it?" I replied. "What will you say if right now I tell you that I have a baby here?" she said while putting my hand on her stomach. "Is this real?" I asked her and she nodded her head. I was shocked, ecstatic, scared, but I was still having an affair./p
p data-p-id="e34dc2095d5e6ae281936b09fb051f0f"During all those times I managed to hide the fact that I cheated on her. Everything kept going as it was./p
p data-p-id="318938bf4e302f3ff6aea0a2852796bb"But I felt guiltier everyday, looking at Pippa. How sincere she is to me. How she trusted me. But I didn't tell her everything, I kept a secret even though we promised to open up to each other./p
p data-p-id="3bcb532887e092dd584153dc83d065cc"The baby came and it's a boy. We named him Sebastian. We both love him dearly. Every time he'd cry at night Pippa would usher me back to sleep and tend for Sebby. She always said, "You work every time, it's my turn to work."/p
p data-p-id="62f65797b1dd9c19cbfe22e00a78e743"I still kept that secret./p
p data-p-id="448eb71aedd4e2744164393776b660e7"Everything, the guilt ate me. One night I told my mistress I don't want this anymore, I have a wife, a child. I couldn't do this anymore. But she told me that she didn't want this affair to stop. She said she gave me more than Pippa had given me all that time. She said she loves me./p
p data-p-id="2c4b2f6d6810ba340be24a22b5a04555"But every time I saw Pippa waiting for me. The way she hugs me. The way she takes care of me. The way she kisses me. The way she always says "I love you, so much nothing can describe it." Even the way she looked at me. She truly loves me and it hurts me to think that I did something so vile to her./p
p data-p-id="621fa99601a6148860cb56f832b22079"I stopped my affair and when I went home. I saw Pippa, a sleepy Pippa, my wife. Waiting for me just like how she always waits for me during those nights. "How's your day Lin?" she asked me and hugged me. "Pip, I'm so sorry..." I told everything to her and I watched how her face became broken. She was pale, her face looked like she didn't deserve anything in this world./p
p data-p-id="d6e6cd56b7ef3a3e84815a05d42286c6"Tears cascading down, she lost all the glimmer she had in her eyes. She shrunk right in front of me. All the memories looked like it flashed on her eyes and that expression of "He has never ever loved you like that." She just stood there trying to process everything. Thinking what has she done wrong all this time./p
p data-p-id="28e3fe2fc5760ec92aca6a2dd23bd3ed"She didn't hit me, nor did she yell at me. She just looked at me hoping everything I said was a lie or joke of some sort. She looked at her wedding ring, our promise. I wanted to turn back time so bad looking at her like that. I wanted to die just seeing her that distraught. She looked at Sebby sleeping in his crib./p
p data-p-id="1ed9b329cae160d2523f10896e37b3ed""What is he now? Was he a product of love?" she said, trying to hold her sobs. "And this," she looked at her ring again, "Was it all true? Was this all a lie?" Her legs looked like it would give up. She had to hold on to a table. "Why?" she asked softly, her eyes pleading for something that I never gave her even though she gave hers to me. Love. "I'm sorry, oh I'm so sorry Lin," she said while brushing her tears. But it kept falling. "I'm sorry I'm not enough, I'll try," she choked out. "I will try to be enough for you," she said brokenly./p
p data-p-id="2a2e35d45a8d5651509f68799b268274"She didn't do anything to separate us. She didn't want a divorce. She forgave me. She made me promise her that I would never do that again. She said she'll change for me, she said she'll be better. She said that she'll try to be enough for me./p
p data-p-id="920577eec7fead1d1a2a0e72809105be"I realized. Everything was my fault. I hurt her, I lied to her, I had an affair. And I hurt my wife by doing that. But she blamed herself. Because she loves me./p
p data-p-id="a9252d1b5760fd19b1710a88dec4711b"We got back to our normal life minus the affair. I tried to make it up for her but I know it'll never be the same. We still go out as husband and wife, outside we're the perfect couple but inside I knew her heart had crumbled to pieces. The way her eyes lost all the light it had before. The way she looked at me. It's different. All her smiles were masks that she used in front of everyone, even me. I could see when she's alone, that smile would fade out./p
p data-p-id="08bb0156e63b231ccdd8dc5ec43d62d4"Even though we got back to our lives. Her small smile every time I'd hug her to sleep, those simple gestures made her happy nonetheless. Just hugging, nothing significant. I was enough for her and I'll always be guilty for not being satisfied. And I know, every night that her back was facing me. She is crying herself to sleep. And that night came often. She has nightmares about that and would often wake up crying. But she didn't tell me so she wouldn't be a burden. She would swim inside her thoughts and think 'Where did I went wrong?'/p
p data-p-id="60e29c855167c99ea477504fa8cc19d9"I know, I have scarred her for life./p
p data-p-id="d41d8cd98f00b204e9800998ecf8427e" /p
p data-p-id="e388ff382c6387f91602fd5990298cdc"strongPoké notes/strong : emI'm sorry, I was scrolling on insta then this came up. It was a holiday morning and I cried because I felt like crying that day. LMAO 💛 Regster out./em/p
p data-p-id="ddca9a4a9754593cda4196258bb1d530"We got married and I was so happy./p
p data-p-id="ca3a957987d980cb8ea7fa474f0dec18"A month into it I was content./p
p data-p-id="cb31a491d7abfc8bfa6fcae327e98cfe"3 months in. I made the worst mistake. I cheated on Pippa, with somebody I met in a bar. I wasn't in my right mind when I did that. At least once a week we would meet up and pleasure ourselves. Pippa didn't know anything about it./p
p data-p-id="c018a2ca45065e3334fa0701df216fc1"When I came home late she would be sitting on the couch waiting for me. She would smile her innocent smile and ask, "How's your day love?" Every single time. Even if it's late at night and she was wasting her sleeping time just waiting for me. She did that not knowing anything and was just being a wife that loves her husband./p
p data-p-id="2eab77633a7c13cc6723d0b3f36887ed""Lin, I have something to tell you," Pippa said groggily. "Yes, what is it?" I replied. "What will you say if right now I tell you that I have a baby here?" she said while putting my hand on her stomach. "Is this real?" I asked her and she nodded her head. I was shocked, ecstatic, scared, but I was still having an affair./p
p data-p-id="e34dc2095d5e6ae281936b09fb051f0f"During all those times I managed to hide the fact that I cheated on her. Everything kept going as it was./p
p data-p-id="318938bf4e302f3ff6aea0a2852796bb"But I felt guiltier everyday, looking at Pippa. How sincere she is to me. How she trusted me. But I didn't tell her everything, I kept a secret even though we promised to open up to each other./p
p data-p-id="3bcb532887e092dd584153dc83d065cc"The baby came and it's a boy. We named him Sebastian. We both love him dearly. Every time he'd cry at night Pippa would usher me back to sleep and tend for Sebby. She always said, "You work every time, it's my turn to work."/p
p data-p-id="62f65797b1dd9c19cbfe22e00a78e743"I still kept that secret./p
p data-p-id="448eb71aedd4e2744164393776b660e7"Everything, the guilt ate me. One night I told my mistress I don't want this anymore, I have a wife, a child. I couldn't do this anymore. But she told me that she didn't want this affair to stop. She said she gave me more than Pippa had given me all that time. She said she loves me./p
p data-p-id="2c4b2f6d6810ba340be24a22b5a04555"But every time I saw Pippa waiting for me. The way she hugs me. The way she takes care of me. The way she kisses me. The way she always says "I love you, so much nothing can describe it." Even the way she looked at me. She truly loves me and it hurts me to think that I did something so vile to her./p
p data-p-id="621fa99601a6148860cb56f832b22079"I stopped my affair and when I went home. I saw Pippa, a sleepy Pippa, my wife. Waiting for me just like how she always waits for me during those nights. "How's your day Lin?" she asked me and hugged me. "Pip, I'm so sorry..." I told everything to her and I watched how her face became broken. She was pale, her face looked like she didn't deserve anything in this world./p
p data-p-id="d6e6cd56b7ef3a3e84815a05d42286c6"Tears cascading down, she lost all the glimmer she had in her eyes. She shrunk right in front of me. All the memories looked like it flashed on her eyes and that expression of "He has never ever loved you like that." She just stood there trying to process everything. Thinking what has she done wrong all this time./p
p data-p-id="28e3fe2fc5760ec92aca6a2dd23bd3ed"She didn't hit me, nor did she yell at me. She just looked at me hoping everything I said was a lie or joke of some sort. She looked at her wedding ring, our promise. I wanted to turn back time so bad looking at her like that. I wanted to die just seeing her that distraught. She looked at Sebby sleeping in his crib./p
p data-p-id="1ed9b329cae160d2523f10896e37b3ed""What is he now? Was he a product of love?" she said, trying to hold her sobs. "And this," she looked at her ring again, "Was it all true? Was this all a lie?" Her legs looked like it would give up. She had to hold on to a table. "Why?" she asked softly, her eyes pleading for something that I never gave her even though she gave hers to me. Love. "I'm sorry, oh I'm so sorry Lin," she said while brushing her tears. But it kept falling. "I'm sorry I'm not enough, I'll try," she choked out. "I will try to be enough for you," she said brokenly./p
p data-p-id="2a2e35d45a8d5651509f68799b268274"She didn't do anything to separate us. She didn't want a divorce. She forgave me. She made me promise her that I would never do that again. She said she'll change for me, she said she'll be better. She said that she'll try to be enough for me./p
p data-p-id="920577eec7fead1d1a2a0e72809105be"I realized. Everything was my fault. I hurt her, I lied to her, I had an affair. And I hurt my wife by doing that. But she blamed herself. Because she loves me./p
p data-p-id="a9252d1b5760fd19b1710a88dec4711b"We got back to our normal life minus the affair. I tried to make it up for her but I know it'll never be the same. We still go out as husband and wife, outside we're the perfect couple but inside I knew her heart had crumbled to pieces. The way her eyes lost all the light it had before. The way she looked at me. It's different. All her smiles were masks that she used in front of everyone, even me. I could see when she's alone, that smile would fade out./p
p data-p-id="08bb0156e63b231ccdd8dc5ec43d62d4"Even though we got back to our lives. Her small smile every time I'd hug her to sleep, those simple gestures made her happy nonetheless. Just hugging, nothing significant. I was enough for her and I'll always be guilty for not being satisfied. And I know, every night that her back was facing me. She is crying herself to sleep. And that night came often. She has nightmares about that and would often wake up crying. But she didn't tell me so she wouldn't be a burden. She would swim inside her thoughts and think 'Where did I went wrong?'/p
p data-p-id="60e29c855167c99ea477504fa8cc19d9"I know, I have scarred her for life./p
p data-p-id="d41d8cd98f00b204e9800998ecf8427e" /p
p data-p-id="e388ff382c6387f91602fd5990298cdc"strongPoké notes/strong : emI'm sorry, I was scrolling on insta then this came up. It was a holiday morning and I cried because I felt like crying that day. LMAO 💛 Regster out./em/p