Chapter 8 – Coming Clean
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Chad limped into the suite Audrey was inhabiting early that morning, most of the blood washed off in his secret apartment, leaving him sore, battered, and bruised, but ultimately triumphant.
"I can't believe you threw in the polygamy law too," Audrey muttered as she fussed over him. "You're so damn stupid sometimes."
"I love you too, Audrey," he said, smile wide and unbelievably happy.
Audrey must have been in a good mood because she deigned to kiss him, was generous enough to scratch his scalp and let him cuddle into her lap like a contented cat.
"The others were worried, according to your hummingbirds," Audrey said. "Uma's not super happy with our game of hide and seek either."
"We should probably do something about that," Chad said through a yawn. "She was supposed to use this time to talk to the others. Did she?"
"They've mostly been arguing," Audrey admitted. "When you wake up, we can go see if she's still interested in us, but if she isn't-"
"Gil-"
"Will stay with her," Audrey said, and she wasn't even resigned, merely certain. Unyielding. "We've already been through that song and dance, James. We know how it goes."
"Okay," Chad said, yawning again. He held up his hand, grinned when she clasped it. "No matter what – you and me to the end?"
"To the end," Audrey agreed. "Now go to sleep, pumpkin."
"Don't act like you didn't stay up all night," Chad said.
Audrey hummed, but made no arguments. They both knew her years of training had left her with mild insomnia, something exacerbated by her anxiety.
"Sleep," she said. "I'll keep watch."
"Okay." Chad curled himself around Audrey, loose and content.
They had done it, finally. They were free.
And now the world was theirs.
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When Chad woke up, he was surprised to find Audrey passed out, the princess slumped against the headboard, one hand tangled in Chad's hair.
He was also surprised to find Ben sitting on a chair next to their bed, watching the two of them with a picture of extreme exhaustion.
The king perked up upon seeing that Chad was awake, and Chad was so certain that he was a hallucination of some kind that he almost had a heart attack when Ben broke the silence. "You got the others to speak to each other again," he offered. "Had to combine their magic efforts to track you down."
Chad didn't know what to say. He settled for a shrug. "You're welcome, I guess."
Ben smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. "I… I'm sorry," he said, in true Ben-platitude fashion. "I- when I asked why you hadn't told me. I couldn't stop thinking about that for days. It implied it was your fault, and it wasn't your fault."
"…neato," Chad said, feeling entirely too exhausted for this conversation.
But Ben didn't seem to be leaving anytime soon, and Chad was too worn out to do this by himself, so he poked Audrey awake.
The princess thanked him for this generosity with a bat of her hand smacking somewhere near his cheek. "What?" she grumbled, rubbing at her eyes.
"Ben's here to be sad," Chad explained, getting a depressed look from Ben. "As you can imagine, he's sorry."
"Neato," Audrey grumbled, slathering on the sarcasm with a level of mastery Chad could only ever hope to attain.
"I already said that."
"Then what'd you wake me up for?" Audrey snapped, keeping most of her attention on Chad.
"Guys," Ben said, patient, but mostly tired. "I'm sorry." Chad was pretty sure he and Audrey rolled their eyes at the same time, because they were garbage people. "I am sorry. I'm sorry you've been hurting all this time and I had no idea. I'm sorry I left you alone for so long after I learned about it, I'm sorry I made it seem like I didn't care about you anymore when I do-"
"Ben," Chad drawled. "Benny."
"Please don't joke right now," Ben asked. "I know you use humor as a defense mechanism-"
"Bennifer," Chad continued, since he was the worst. "We get it, you had to prioritize."
"And, like most things when it comes to my relationships, I did that wrong," Ben spat, with just the right amount of bitterness to gain Chad and Audrey's attention. "Uma told me about what you'd said. I don't- none of us hate you or think less of you. Carlos is confused by you, because he's spent so long believing you're one thing that he's scared to think that you're something else because he doesn't want to get hurt, but we've been scrambling to wrap our heads around your abuse and your magic and the masks you've maintained for years that we let you slip through the cracks, and I don't want that." He reached forward, grabbing for each of their hands, and for whatever reason, they let him. "You two were my first crushes, and I did a lot of things wrong by you. I never saw the reasons behind some of your behavior-"
"That was the point," Chad said so Audrey wouldn't do so more angrily.
"That doesn't make it right," Ben insisted. "I care about you two. I care about all parts of you. The survivors, the fighters, the quiet geniuses. Don't- you don't have to maintain some kind of façadewith us. Please. Please give us a chance to care for you. We really want to."
There was a tense pause. "And do you speak for everyone?" Audrey asked. "Are you sure they don't think we're too mean?"
"Meanness has never been a problem with this group," Ben said, grinning. "Most of us consider it a bonus. So." He squeezed their hands carefully. "Could you please come out now? We want to hear your stories, please."
Chad shared a look with Audrey, and eventually, the princess shrugged. "Sure," she said. "Why not?"
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Ben led them through the secret passageways to his suite, and the moment they made their way into the room Gil and Jay were upon them, Gil swinging Audrey into his arms like she weighed nothing and Jay falling to his knees, uttering an onslaught of apologies that was enough to make Chad feel embarrassed on his behalf.
The hugs were nice though, Doug joining in on it stubbornly before Uma was forced to wave them all away, letting Audrey and Chad settle on a couch by themselves while the rest of them scattered around the room, forming a loose circle.
"So," Audrey said, her eyes half-lidded and bored. "I guess I'll tell you about how my grandmothers went a little nutso."
It wasn't a great story. Chad, who had been there for most of it, still managed to flinch from time-to-time, making Audrey roll her eyes in exasperation. By the time she was done, more than one of them was crying, but Audrey seemed to feel a lot better, which in turn made Chad feel better.
"Okay," Mal said, digging her fingernails into the palm of her hands. "Okay, that was a horrible story."
"Not to be entirely offensive," Chad began. "But like, your lives were pretty horrible too."
"We do not compare hurts," Evie said sagely, which was actually pretty good advice. "Now um… what's your story Chad?"
"We literally just went over it," Chad said, somewhat confused. "I'd step in for Audrey-"
"Yeah, we all know there's more to it than that," Harry interrupted. "Ye literally never talk about your family."
"And the injuries…" Doug spoke up, not one to be ignored.
Chad let his head fall back with a sigh. "For the record, it is not a big deal."
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"…the fuck?" Mal said, looking like she regretted this entire line of dialogue. "So your kingdom's been actively trying to kill you since you were- what, eight?"
"Pretty much," Chad hummed. "But I recently updated the inheritance laws to make them entirely more tedious, so even if they did manage to kill me, my laws would still be in effect until someone completed the new trials – which are rigorous and cannot be bribed through."
"So they may as well just do what every other kingdom does and suck up to him," Audrey said, the epitome of practicality. "And, you know, blackmail their councilmen or whatever."
"A less deadly game of intrigue."
"Ye…" Harry began, his cheeks dusted in a pale blush. "So ye've um… killed a bunch of assassins, then? How many?"
"Stopped counting when it hit triple digits," Chad replied honestly. "Does that make you hot?"
Harry's throat bobbed in a swallow, his thighs squeezing together in an attempt to hide a growing predicament that should have taken Chad less by surprise than it did.
"Get over here, Hook," Chad ordered, and no one was shocked when Harry scrambled to follow the demand, inhaling sharply when Chad dragged him into his lap, cupping a hand firmly between his legs.
"Guys," Mal groaned, flopping against Carlos. "This is secret sharing time. Not pampering time."
"Who says we can't do both?" Chad hummed, and the sound of Harry's whimper was a delightful thing, because apparently the first mate had a bit of an exhibitionist streak in him.
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"So, you have contacts everywhere," Ben said, his cheeks flushed and gaze pointedly turned away from the sight of debauched Harry, the pirate loose and crooning in Chad's arms as the prince continued to tease him post-release.
"Most everywhere," Audrey said. "It's the practical thing to do."
"Knowledge is power," Chad offered. "Get yourself a good hacker, a good tech-"
"Some friends in the council office," Audrey listed off. "A media person."
"You can't do this stuff alone," Chad continued, watching his hummingbirds lazily flutter across the room, Carlos trying hard not to stare at them.
"So you've actually both been smart this whole time," Mal deduced, sharing a look with Uma. "And your end goal was what?"
"This," Chad said, motioning to all of them.
Audrey's shoulders hunched defensively. "We were cripplingly lonely."
"And Audrey and I are pretty great," Chad said. "But we're also like, the same person, and we need to talk to other people."
"And for whatever reason, you guys like us."
"Fools," Chad hummed, nodding sagely.
Harry scowled, then grabbed Chad's chin, dragging him down into a kiss that could only be classified as filthy. "Ye're fucking ours, do ye hear me?" he growled, and that was- yes, very hot.
Audrey made grabby hands, leaning over so she could get a kiss too, and Harry gladly obliged.
"Also," Audrey said when she pulled back. "Chad's been in love with Doug since junior high."
"Audrey," Chad hissed, trying to hide his embarrassment behind Harry, who just wasn't having it.
Audrey, being a person who did not give a shit, ignored him. "He couldn't act on it or Doug would get targeted by the assassins like his mom, which-" She turned to Evie. "Is also why he shut you down so hard. That was why he ratted you out to the teacher – he needed a solid break between the two of you or you would have also been targeted."
"Holy fuck," Harry grumbled. "Could ye have anything?"
"I had Audrey," Chad said, tensing defensively. "And Ben. Sort of."
That was more than nothing.
"So wait," Carlos said, holding a hand up. "Did… did you know I bugged your computer?"
"Of course we knew," Audrey said, rolling her eyes. "You have the subtlety of a stampeding elephant."
Carlos froze. "Then you did all that shit on purpose!"
"Obviously," Chad drawled. "You were being a giant asshole."
"So the birthday party and the- did you set up my furniture to get moved?"
Chad cackled; his expression was so sweet.
"Again," Audrey giggled. "You deserved it. Also, Jane wasn't playing coy about the lounge. Chad and I did that, and we were listening to your reaction in the secret passageway. So here's a belated fuck you for calling Chad a whore."
"I mean-" Chad began to defend, but was silenced by Audrey's glare.
"You are not a whore," she repeated firmly, refusing to yield an inch.
Chad averted his gaze from her might, deciding to focus on Carlos again, who seemed entirely bamboozled.
And then the young De Ville was climbing into Harry's lap so he could get to Chad, pulling him into a desperate kiss that took Chad completely off guard.
When they pulled apart, Audrey was laughing. "I may have forgotten to mention that Carlos was also in the club of people who resent having a crush on you." She let out an amused sigh. "Decided to go with Jay though, he thinks more with his dick."
"I mean…" Mal sighed. "You're not wrong."
"So you did target Jay and Gil?" Evie asked, getting them back on task.
"Sort of," Audrey said. "Chad's been jonesing for Doug's bones for years, and I thought I really wanted Ben. In hindsight though, that was my grandmothers' conditioning more than anything else. I'm happy with Gil."
"And I'm happy with you," Gil said sweetly, the second mate pulling Audrey into his lap, ending with a high five as they celebrated their joint awesomeness.
"For the record, our um- responses after we thought we cut ties with you were real," Chad said, ducking his head. "I really do love you, Jay. And I know I'm not the dumb asshole you wanted-"
"Chad," Carlos said, looking him dead in the eye. "You are literally so much better than anything we could have hoped for. Both of you."
"Yeah," Evie added. "Because now you're people instead of personas."
"Deadly, deadly people," Harry said with a sigh. Chad shifted the hand that was in the first mate's underwear again, just to see that furious blush darken.
"Okay, this is good," Mal declared. "This is better. Now we have even more clever, talented, and vicious people in our group."
"For the record," Ben said, staring at the ceiling. "I um- would like to know about your plans when you have them."
"You would go crazy if we did that," Audrey said, nipping at the curve of Carlos' neck and guiding Gil's hand between the young De Ville's legs, likely because it made him blush horrifically. "Because we have a lot of them."
"It's true," Chad said, determined to get Harry worked up again. "And, you know, plausible deniability's a thing."
"Moot point," Evie hummed, watching the exchange with a growing smile. "We already tell Ben all our not-so-ethical plans, so."
"I can't just watch this," Jay groaned, dragging a hand over his face. "Guys."
Uma rolled her eyes but crawled over to the Agraben teen, sneaking a hand under his shirt so she could start viciously twisting his nipples. "Insatiable."
"Um," Doug said, his cheeks colored in a lovely blush. "About Chad loving me…"
"Why Douglass is my soulmate," Audrey recited with vindictive glee. "A poem by Chadwick James-"
"Audrey," Chad hissed. "You promised we would never speak of that again."
"Should have thought of that before you recited it enough times for me to have it memorized," she cackled. "Evie, want to hear the verse about his eyes, or about the cute way he plays the trumpet? Preteen Chad had a lot of thoughts on this."
"I take back every nice thing I said about you," Chad sniffed, trying to distract himself with Harry, who was panting in his arms.
"Just for that, I'm starting at the top," Audrey grinned, and then Chad grinned, because they'd found a group of people to love them for the paranoid little psychos they were, and for whatever reason, they did not take off screaming in the other direction.
"Yes," Jane sighed, cuddling close to Ben with a flush as Mal leaned over to pepper her neck with kisses. "This is good."
"Very good," Evie agreed.
And yeah, Chad couldn't have put it better himself.
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Endnotes:
And that's it, folks! Thanks so much to everyone who stuck around for this crazy ride :)
If you're on the lookout for some more Descendants goodness, I'll be posting my next plot-heavy fic, 'Once Upon a Misspent Youth', on Sunday. It is a Mal-Centric mild canon rewrite/fix-it of Descendants 1, but no worries. If you're looking for more Chad, he and Doug are heavy players in this one ^_^
Story notes:
Did I have plans for a grand takeover of Sardinia? Sure, but my inspiration sort of petered out when I realized that it wouldn't do much to progress the relationship development, which was really what this story was about. So yeah, it all happens off screen. Assume it was super epic ;D
Until next time ;)