[A/N: Real life got in the way of putting out this chapter. I really wish I could cut myself off from the world to just research and write but I'm not rich enough to be able to do that. Have I mentioned how much I hate writing courtroom scenes? I never feel like I do them right. I did pull a couple of bits and pieces from A Pinch of Salt, A Dash of Magic's Chapter 6 courtroom scene because let's face it, there's only so many times you could write such a thing. For the record, I shall NEVER write another courtroom scene for as long as I live! (faceplants onto the desk)]

Chapter 8: Trials, Test Runs and Feathery Things

Immediately after the Trial of Sirius Black, Ministry of Magic, Courtroom Ten

"Next case, Terrance?" Albus called out to the Scribe.

Terrance looked over the parchments and paled a bit, "Next case is Harry James Potter versus Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore!"

The gallery and the 'Mot went bananas. Shouted questions and flashbulbs fired off left and right. Albus stood there in silent shock before slowly shaking his head in disbelief. Madam Augusta Longbottom stood up, "Chief Warlock? You need to recuse yourself, perhaps let one of the others take the seat?"

Albus waved his hand dismissively, "There's no need for this. There won't be a case heard today. It's nothing more than a misunderstanding."

Amelia immediately arced up, "Regardless of your views, you've been called as a party to the case. You have to recuse yourself. Now hand over the gavel to someone else!"

Albus glared at Amelia with his best 'disappointed statesman' look but to no avail. With a much put-upon sigh, he handed the gavel off to Madam Longbottom and moved to sit in the defendant's chair. The new Acting Chief Witch banged the gavel and called for order.

"Is the barrister for Mr. Potter here?"

Ted Tonks stood up, "Here, Chief Witch. I am Theodore Tonks, contracted by the muggle guardians of Harry James Potter via Gringotts."

"Very well. Albus? Do you have someone to represent you?"

Albus huffed, "I shall represent myself. This 'trial' is nothing more than…"

Augusta overrode him, "You'll be able to give an opening statement in a moment. Mr. Tonks? You have the floor."

Ted Tonks opened the case in which he accused Albus Dumbledore of failing in his alleged role of magical guardian to one Harry James Potter. He described how in the previous ten years not once did Albus ever speak or interacted with Mister and Missus Vernon and Petunia Dursley about the care and safety of the boy in question. "In fact, Albus had never even spoken with the Dursleys before or since the evening he dumped toddler Harry onto their front doorstep on 1 November 1981, just a condescending letter affixed to the toddler's basket stating that someone would return in time to take the child back to the magical world to begin his Hogwarts education! Additionally, Mrs. Dursley has given evidence that she found the boy on her doorstep the next morning freezing cold and slightly blue wrapped in a thin baby blanket and wearing nothing more than a toddler's pajamas." Gasps of outrage were heard from the gallery.

When it was Albus' turn to give an opening speech, he stood there and tried to look like the aggrieved party forced to 'suffer the bleatings of the dirty muggles who were trying to pull the wool over his eyes.' "Lords and ladies, this is nothing more than the muggles' attempt to scam young Harry out of the care and guidance I have given for the past ten years. They try to claim that I've never spoken or interacted with them but that is not true. I can produce evidence that I have been to their place on multiple occasions, I have letters written by the boy when he was old enough to know how to write as well as letters written by the adults and have seen with my own eyes that young Mr. Potter was growing up to be a fine young wizard."

First to be called up as witness for the prosecution was Belinda Honeybloom followed by Robert Cody who both in turn gave character witness testimony about what Harry was like as a child in their classrooms as well as what they knew of the Dursleys and the attempted smear campaign by Albus. The phony 'newspaper articles' were submitted into evidence as to the lengths Albus would go to in order to retain control of every aspect of young Harry's life. After them, Petunia Dursley was called to the stand. There were shouts of disgust and outrage that a muggle had been allowed within their sacred courts. Petunia just continued to walk to the witness stand with her head held high and eyes forward. After being sworn in, Petunia related how neither she nor her husband had ever spoken with nor seen hide or hair of Albus, only a letter which had been left in Harry's carrying basket. Said letter was introduced into evidence and read aloud, much to Albus' apparent displeasure if the pinched look on his face was any indication. Everyone could practically hear the condescension in the man's written words about what he expected to have happen and that there would be no contact until it was time for Harry to be returned to the magical world to begin his education.

"Mrs. Dursley? Is it true that you were not even supposed to be the one selected by the late Lily Potter nee Evans to be the caregiver to her son?"

Petunia pursed her lips and nodded sadly, "It's true. Lily and I had had a bit of a falling out during the last year of her life. I wanted her to leave behind the magical world and come home where it was safe but she told me in no uncertain terms that she would do what was right and fight for her right to live within the magical world and to be married to a wonderful pureblood husband and raise their son as they saw fit."

"Did it ever cause you to wonder as to why then young Harry was given over to you?"

Petunia sniffed, "I did for a while but grew to love him as my own eventually. I realized that raising Harry as my own was my only opportunity to make things right with my sister, may she rest in peace."

"But raising a magical child couldn't have been easy for someone with no magic themselves."

Petunia chuckled lightly, "No, it hasn't. There were a few times when Harry would get stubborn about not taking a bath or eating his vegetables and cause something to happen. I remember one time; he refused to eat his carrots and caused them to fly right out of the restaurant window. My husband and I had to come up with the excuse that even as a toddler he was shaping up to be a world-class bowler." This caused a few in the audience to laugh.

Petunia was asked about the financial side of things. She related that they were fortunate that her husband made enough money to include the sudden arrival of a toddler. Other topics were brought up such as any injuries or illnesses Harry had obtained or contracted or what his relationship with her son was like and how young Harry got along with friends and family.

"As a point of fact, Mrs. Dursley; did you not wonder why James and Lily Potter never included a stipend to assist those who would be taking care of their son?"

Petunia shrugged, "I would've thought that sort of thing would be covered in their Will but I've never seen it."

Ted's grin was shark-like as he held up a folder, "I have here the Final Will and Testament of James and Lily Potter…"

Albus was on his feet in an instant, "Objection! That Will was sealed by the order of the Wizengamot in 1981!"

Ted still had his shark-like grin, "As a point of order, Mr. Dumbledore; it was you who used your powers as Chief Warlock to illegally seal the contents of the Will filed with the Ministry. Goblin certified test results show that the Ministry copy was forged. This copy was filed and certified by the Goblins of Gringotts." He handed over the Will to the Chief Witch who made to open it. Albus started to pull his wand and was immediately hit with a stunner from Amelia who had been watching the old man like a hawk.

"Director Bones! What was the reason for stunning him?"

"He was pulling his wand on you, Chief Witch. I would suspect that there is something in that Will he doesn't want known to everyone." Augusta huffed and glared at the still form of Albus.

Opening the folder, she began to read aloud. Skipping over the usual boilerplate stuff, she through the bequeathments and requests. Sirius Black had been named Godfather as per the Ritual (they already knew that), someone named Remus Lupin had been bequeathed one hundred thousand Galleons and co-custody in the raising of Harry alongside Sirius, Alice and Frank Longbottom were named as next in line to care for Harry if something happened to Sirius and Remus. Minerva McGonagall had been gifted with governance of a muggleborn scholarship fund as well as a selection of rare Transfiguration books. Peter Pettigrew was outed as the Potter Secret Keeper (they knew that too.) There were also various charities, donations of new equipment to the school and scholarships that they wished to fund from the main accounts.

Down at the bottom was a declaration that Harry was never supposed to be given to Vernon and Petunia Dursley because of the bad relations that Lily had with her sister (they knew that as well). To cap it all off was the signing by James and Lily, their Gringotts Goblin Account Manager and as a Witness… Albus Dumbledore.

A few minutes later…

Albus awoke to find himself chained in the same chair that Sirius had once occupied. He tried to fight his way out but the enchanted chains just bound him down tighter. He was then brought up to speed regarding the contents of the Potter Will and why he was so insistent that it be kept from the public's knowledge.

"Imagine our surprise Albus, when we learned that you were not only there while the Will was being written but also signed it as a Witness. You've known all along what Lord Potter and his wife wanted for their son and yet you did everything in your power to deny a child his due. Additionally, we've learned from the Goblins that you've tried on numerous occasions to illegally access the main Potter vaults as well as steal money and properties from Mr. Potter's personal vaults for reasons known only to you but that we suspect is nothing more than your alleged Greater Good philosophy."

Albus merely glared silently at the assemblage.

"We've also had those letters you mentioned as having brought before us via elf and tested by an Unspeakable. They were found to have been falsely written by one of the Hogwarts Elves, dictated to by you. We also have the elf in question give a statement that he did not wish to partake in such a thing against the son of his master but had no choice because of the illegal slave contract you'd created when you illegally appointed yourself as magical guardian to Mr. Potter when you had no right to do so. Over five thousand Galleons stolen from Mr. Potter's personal vault were spent on legislation and bribes to various department heads and sitting Wizengamot members to pass or suppress laws, all the while committing fraud by using Mr. Potter's name in proxy. Offshore accounts illegally made in young Mr. Potter's guardians' names being rerouted to other accounts belonging to aliases of you, illegal book contracts regarding the so-called 'Harry Potter Adventures,' as well as speculative accounts of what happened that Halloween night with all proceeds funneled into hidden accounts belonging to you. It beggars disbelief and outrage of nearly all of us that you could be so cruel."

"As the boy's magical guardian it was up to you to make sure that Mr. Potter was informed of his family's history and finances, treated for his wounds accumulated on that night, brought up to understand the generalities of our world and yet you completely and utterly failed to do so. It makes us wonder as to why. Why is it so important to you that Mr. Harry James Potter be raised ignorant of his place in the world?"

Albus finally managed to get a word in edgewise, "Everything I've done for our society and yes, some of it was using Mr. Potter's name to get some things done by those that would resist the necessary steps to preserving our way of life, I've done for the Greater Good." His arguments that those laws were designed to protect their society from 'dangerous and unsavory elements,' "What I'm trying to do is to save our society from undue outside influences! Every year, our safe and secure way of life is threatened by those who come in and try to tell us that the old ways are no longer valid. You all need a strong leader and that is I. I am the one who educates the young impressionable minds that their muggle ways are a hindrance to their futures and that they need to let go of their fancy 'technology' and embrace the slower, gentler path that magic provides."

Augusta gave him a cold look, "The Wizengamot shall adjourn for a short recess to deliberate on the evidence and testimony given." She banged the gavel on the block.

It had been decided in a vote of 42 to 8 that Albus Dumbledore was found guilty on all counts of theft, fraud and illegal Will tampering from a Noble and Most Ancient Family. All properties, elves and other holdings were to be returned forthwith. Albus was forbidden from any further interactions with the Potter and Dursley families. His accounts and holdings would be drained to start repaying the money he stole while his wages would be garnished until full repayment was completed. He was removed and barred from taking and holding any office within the Ministry and lost his seat on the International Council of Wizards as Supreme Mugwump. His appointment as Headmaster would be determined by the school's Board of Directors at a later date.

Outside of the courtroom…

Vernon wrapped his shaking wife up in his arms and soothed her as best he could. It was unfortunate that he never got to go in to testify but according to what he'd overheard, the case against the headmaster took a turn for the worse (at least for the headmaster) when the real Will had been revealed.

"So? How did it go?"

Petunia let out a nervous breath of relief, "It was unexpected. I knew that Dumbledore would've tried to get the case overturned over some trumped up technicality but for him to try to attack the Chief Witch as she was about to read the Will out loud is just mind-blowing."

Vernon blinked in surprise, "He did what?!"

Petunia nodded wearily, "Yup, he was in the middle of pulling his wand when their police chief stunned him."

"Wow. So what happened after that?"

Petunia described what happened and what the results of the 'Mot's deliberation were. Vernon was pleased that the old man would be taken out of the picture and that they might actually be able to live their lives in peace.

Same time, back at Hogwarts

Right when the magics of the illegal slave contract and guardianship of Harry James Potter was lifted, Goofy and nine other elves within the castle suddenly stopped what they were doing and stared off into space, blinking rapidly as they regained control of their memories of their master, his wife and son.

Goofy immediately popped into the Hufflepuff Common Room with a wide-eyed look of agitation, "Master Harry! Where is being Master Harry!" Harry looked up from where he was sitting at the main table.

"Goofy? What's wrong?"

Goofy sighed in relief and snapped his fingers causing the other nine to appear in a rapid cracking of elf apparition, "We is being Potter elves again, Master Harry!" There were relieved and joyous smiles all around the assembled elves. Everyone else turned to stare at Harry who in turn was staring back at the elves with a wide-eyed, mouth dropped open stunned silence.

"Who...wha…huh?" His eyes rolled up in his head as he passed out.

Hermione giggled, "I think you broke him, Goofy."

Professor Sprout was called for, Harry woken up and over the course of an hour the truth of the elves, their relationship to Harry, his own history and a host of other things came to light. Goofy explained how it was the mean, old Headmaster Whiskers who took control of the Potter magic along with the elves, houses and things for his own use. The elves were transferred to Hogwarts and forbidden to speak with Harry when he arrived for his schooling about anything of his past.

Harry's brain finally came back online at that moment, "Goofy? You've worked with Neville and me before; how did you get around your orders then?"

"Goofy was not telling Master Harry about anything from before. Goofy was merely getting things that Master Harry asked for."

Pomona shot Harry a questioning look. Harry caught it and explained, "I asked him for a camera and some things to help Neville create his Herbology flash cards. I also asked Jelly to bring the Sorting Hat so I could take a picture of it." She cocked her head in an accepting motion.

Hermione in the meantime had cuddled up next to Harry and asked, "So what happens now?"

Harry shrugged, "This is all kind of sudden. I wouldn't know the first thing to do. I need to go email my aunt and uncle." He extricated himself from her cuddling and hurried off to his trunk. He reappeared a moment later carrying his PA and clicked it on as he sat back down.

To: Petunia Dursley, Vernon Dursley

Subject: Something Magical happened…

Dear Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon,

Something weird just happened here at Hogwarts. I was sitting in the Hufflepuff Common Room when ten elves appeared and declared that I was their Master. They said it was something about the 'bad magics from Headmaster Whiskers, illegal slave contracts and magical guardianships.'

What gives?

Harry

"And now we wait," he commented after sending off the message. It was a testament to how often Pomona and the other magically raised had seen Harry using the PA that they didn't even blink an eye at the display of instant communication. "So, now what?"

"I would recommend that you have your elves return to your ancestral home and properties to look them over and repair what needs to be done. I daresay that you and your guardians will probably want to take a look at them at some point," Pomona replied.

Harry cocked his jaw and pursed his lips in thought, "Good idea. Goofy?" Goofy turned, "I would like you to do what Professor Sprout here recommended. Go and fix what needs to be done. I have no idea what's going to happen or be required after today but better safe than sorry, eh?"

Goofy and the other nine elves bowed or curtseyed before him then popped out.

Harry scrubbed his hand through his hair, "I need to take a walk. Hermione? Would you like to join me?"

She beamed a smile, jumped up and held out her hand.

Harry and Hermione took a random direction and idly walked in silence as Harry tried to process what had happened.

"Hermione, what am I supposed to do? What do I know about being some creature's master?"

Hermione shrugged, "Library? Talk to others who have elves? Wait for your aunt and uncle to get in contact with you?"

Harry just sighed in mild frustration and headed out of the castle for some air.

They ended up at the paddocks near Hagrid's hut and stood there watching the hippogriffs grazing. The stallion lifted its head and called out, ["What do you want, two leggers?"]

"It's nothing, my friend here just received some startling news," Hermione explained to the surprise of the stallion as it approached the pair.

["You understand me?"]

Hermione giggled, "This is probably going to happen often, I guess. Yes, I can understand you even if I can't speak your language. Or maybe I am but I can't tell the difference." She glanced over at Harry but he was too deep in introspection to respond.

"Oi! What's goin' on here?" Both Hermione and the stallion turned to see Hagrid hurrying up, concern on his face.

"Hi, Hagrid! I was just telling the stallion here that I understand what he was saying," Hermione beamed at the bigger man. He slowed to a stop and looked at her curiously then brightened.

"Oh, yeah! Perfessor Kettleburn mentioned you, never thought I'd get ter witness it, meself."

Harry came out of his funk and looked puzzled, "Weren't you there when Hermione and I were meeting the unicorn?"

Hagrid shook his head, "Nah, Kettleburn and I never met up. I was dealin' with a problem in the Forest." He turned back to Hermione, "So, you can whinny and all that?"

Hermione shrugged, "To me it all sounds like English. I have no idea what it sounds like to an outsider. Would you like to help?"

Hagrid motioned for her to continue. She turned to the stallion, "Okay, first off; what is your name?"

["What my mother called me or what the half-giant calls me?"]

Hermione giggled, "Both."

["My mother named me 'Logan' while this one calls me 'Buckbeak.'"]

Hermione turned to Hagrid who had a weird expression on his face, "Buckbeak?"

Hagrid blinked, "Um… uh, dunno…It jus' seemed to fit. Why?"

"His mother named him 'Logan.'"

Hagrid looked between the two, surprise etched on his face, "Logan? Well, that's better than what I came up with." He shrugged, "Okay, I guess I kin call you that too. As fer you, Hermione; it sounds like yer kinda talkin' but mixed with the high pitched nickering they do to each other."

Hermione and Harry were surprised, here was the first indication that she could also speak the language! Harry facepalmed himself, "I'm an idiot! The PA has a recording feature, gah!"

Hermione patted him on the arm, "We can do that later. Thank you, Hagrid and Logan!" She gave both a hug and dragged Harry by the arm back to the castle.

Headmaster's Office…

Albus returned to his office in an incandescent rage. He was so angry that the power of coherent speech was beyond him. He turned to the gadgets that were supposed to monitor the boy's magic and health only to see that they were no longer working. With an inarticulate roar, he pulled out his wand and let fly with destructive curses until they were nothing more than debris and melted blobs on the carpet. Dropping down in his chair, Albus pulled out a sheet of parchment and tried to write out some orders only to be prevented by the fact that he couldn't remember the boy's name! Try as he might, he just couldn't recall what the brat was called. Frustrated, he floo called Minerva and asked her to come to his office post haste.

When she arrived, Minerva had an indescribable look on her face, "Problem?"

Albus huffed, "There's a student that goes here but for the life of me, I cannot recall his name. If I describe him, would you please tell me his name?" Minerva waved her hand for him to continue.

"Who whaxas vossupp laxavon fraxang whaxail, kloon oyos pi dis din Whubbropubb." Albus frowned at the look of puzzled incredulity on Minerva's face.

He tried again, "Who nud zo sen eb Jaxamos pi Rirupp."

"Albus, you're not making any sense. That's not a language I recognize."

He tried a different tack, "The Wizengamot is made up of originally fifty powerful families…"

Minerva nodded, "That I understood clearly. What changed?"

Albus thought about it which caused the look of disbelief and anger to grow on his features, "That damn restraining order! Pum caxaniz taxark axafuk el posclifo zo feupp withuk switstick te zis kiffolisk!"

Despite the seriousness, Minerva burst out laughing, "I think I see the problem. There's someone that you're not allowed to speak about without triggering the effects. I'm pretty sure who it is but I doubt that it would do you any good if this problem translates to writing as well."

Albus angrily pointed to the parchment, "Tell me the name!"

Minerva's lips thinned as she shook her head, "Nay, I will not. Not that I can't but won't. I shall not be a party to whatever sort of idiocy you have in mind. You brought whatever this is on and I shan't be embroiled in it. Good day, Headmaster." She got up and left his office.

Once outside, she immediately headed off to Pomona's office. She could guess that this had something to do with Mr. Potter.

Pomona's office in the greenhouses…

Minerva was about to head to her friend's office connected to her House but then remembered that she usually spent her time during the week in her greenhouse office so headed in that direction. When she arrived, she found Neville bent over into a raised box of some kind with his feet dancing around in the air.

"Mr. Longbottom?"

"Mrmph!" Came the muffled reply. She tapped him on the leg which caused him to jump then squirm back until he was upright. His hair was an utter mess and he had dirt smeared on his face though his eyes danced with glee.

"Professor, hi!"

She gestured at the box, "What were you doing in there?"

Neville looked a bit sheepish, "There's a seedling that didn't want to come out so I was trying to get it."

Minerva gave him an exasperated look, "Why not just open the sides of the box?"

Neville shook his head, "It's capable of running fast if given the room."

"I see… is it dangerous?"

Neville thought for a moment before shaking his head again, "Not that I know of. It normally is found in caves near the beaches of Cornwall." There was a slight squeaking sound and a tiny tentacle was seen poking itself above the rim of the box. Quick as a flash, Neville reached in and grabbed the seedling. The tiny seedling flailed and thrashed trying to get away but Neville wouldn't let go and even started petting it while whispering quietly and gently.

"It's amazing to watch, isn't it?" Minerva turned at the sound of Pomona's voice behind her. "Mr. Longbottom has the same sort of intuitive skill with plants that Miss Granger has with BeastSpeak or Mr. Potter with that muggle device of his."

Minerva gave her the stink-eye, "Aye and all I have tis the Quidditch talents of Mr. Oliver Wood and chaotic abilities of the Weasley Twins."

Pomona shrugged as she led the two of them back into her office, "Tea?" Minerva declined. "So what brings you by?"

"I was just in Albus' office and apparently he's now under some kind of restraining order against Mr. Potter. He can't even say the boy's name without transitioning into gibberish."

Pomona's grin was predatory, "Good. The old goat deserves it."

"Aye, but the question is why it happened in the first place?"

Pomona explained that Albus had been found negligent of magical guardianship duties to Mr. Potter as well as attempting to attack the Chief Witch during their hearing at the Ministry. She said that this and other things had come to light when the muggle guardians of Mr. Potter filed a grievance against Albus that stated that Albus had been stealing money to bribe legislators as well as misappropriating elves, properties, proxies and a lot of other things while keeping the poor boy unaware of his role in magical society. "I'm sure there's more but that's the gist of things as I understand it."

"How did ye find out?"

Pomona sipped from her teacup, "Mr. Potter sent a letter to his aunt and uncle asking for clarification after the Potter Elves announced themselves to him. They replied not twenty minutes ago."

Minerva looked puzzled, "I dinna ken that Mr. Potter was receiving mail anymore. No owls have been showing up at breakfast."

Pomona gave another predatory grin, "Ah, but with that device of his; he no longer needs to rely on the relatively slow wait time for owl mail. He can connect with them nearly instantaneously anywhere in the world with them."

Minerva sat back in shock, "Anywhere in the world?"

Pomona bowed her head once and gestured widely, "Yup, according to him is that he can send a letter from here in Scotland to Perth, Australia in about a second. He reminds anyone who asks that the speed is just for delivery though. The recipient still needs to read and understand what is written then send back a reply which takes longer."

"Still... That's incredible and also explains how he's been able to stay on top of things despite Albus' manipulations."

Thursday 20 February 1992 Just outside the Defense classroom

"Gah! How can anyone stand that stutter?"

"Why doesn't he go to Saint Mungo's and have the Healers look him over?"

"It's not the stutter that bothers me, it's the stench! Has he never heard of soap?"

Hermione listened quietly as the others around her complained about their defense teacher, Quirrell. She agreed the man was a terrible teacher but she'd never say that out loud. Harry gave her a questioning look after she grunted a response to Susan's complaint about the soap suggestion.

"It's nothing, Harry. I just refuse to say anything out loud. I agree with her but I don't want to get into trouble."

"Why would you get into trouble?"

She gave him a cute, patronizing smile and patted him on the arm, "Harry, I'm a mug, er…mundane born. I've read some of the etiquette books that state that if a mundane born gets into trouble, the consequences can be severe including banishment from the magical world."

Harry's eyes widened, "Oh."

"Yeah, Oh. I don't want to be banished so I'll just keep my mouth shut for the time being and focus on the important battles."

A smirk snuck onto his face and his eyes danced, "Such as?"

Hermione just huffed in mock annoyance, "If you're going to be like that then I won't tell you."

Harry dropped to his knees and began to over the top begging and pleading, "Please, my Lady! Please tell this unworthy boy your plans for world domination. Allow this child to partake in whatever you have in mind."

Hermione rolled her eyes and started giggling, "Haarrry! Get up, you dork!" She tugged up on his arm. He rose to his feet and wrapped his arms around her shoulders and touched her forehead with his, "I'm sorry for being such a dork but I just can't help it. You bring out my silliness." She just smiled shyly and wiggled gently in his embrace.

Breaking the embrace, she replied that she wanted to get changed into something more comfortable now that classes were done for the day.

"What'd you have in mind?"

She pursed her lips, "Not sure. I was leaning towards wearing my Mickey Mouse tie-dye shirt and a pair of shorts."

"Got any more of those shirts with a funny saying on it?"

"At least a dozen. Why?"

"No reason, just curious as to what else you had. I like those shirts, some of them are funny." He smiled as she led the two back to the Main Hallway.

When they got back into Puff dorms, Harry split off from Hermione to drop his stuff off in his room. As he was busy puttering around his Box of Chaos, the door opened as Hermione swept in; her arms full of clothes.

"I thought I'd bring some of my options here and let you see."

Harry immediately blushed, "You're not going to change out here, are you?"

A sly gleam appeared on her face, "Maybe…" At his panicked expression, she laughed, "Relax, Harry. I promise not to do anything like that until much later." Harry breathed out in relief. She began laying out the different shirts, shorts and skirts.

"So what do you think? I'm leaning towards the shorts rather than the skirts since I have to wear a skirt to class every day."

Harry nodded and pointed to the bright solid green cargo shorts, "I like this one." Hermione pulled that off to the side. He continued to rifle through her shirts and pulled out a white T-shirt that had a silly happy face on it with the message underneath that read 'Smile. It confuses people.'

"Definitely this one. That's hilarious."

"I agree and it's true. The look of confusion on the Slytherins' faces ought to be priceless."

"Have you seen the look of panic on people's faces when the Twins start smiling? That's the reaction the Snakes will have."

She cocked her head to the side, "I don't want them to fear me, Harry."

Harry allowed for that, "Okay, maybe it won't be fear but they'll definitely be wary."

Hermione took the selected outfit and disappeared into his bathroom for a moment. When she returned, she finished the look with a pair of mismatched red and blue Keds and her favorite candy cane striped socks.

Harry's face took on a perplexed look, "Do you not care that you look like a rainbow explosion?"

She held her arms out and looked down at herself then back up, "Nope! I'm twelve and therefore still a child. A child gets to wear whatever they want without caring what others think of them."

Harry was reaching for something on his desk when his hand stilled. He got the same look on his face whenever he was inspired by a prank.

"Harry?"

"I just had an idea based on your outfit."

She dropped her hands on her hips and glared at him, "If you're thinking of messing with my clothes…"

He waved that away, "No, I meant changing someone else to look like a rainbow explosion."

She rolled her eyes, "Boys."

Saturday morning and the school got to witness a whole new Draco Malfoy. There was nothing different about the boy himself, he was still a poncy git but now every time he moved into the sunlight he glittered and glowed like some cheesy vampire from an angsty and poorly written teenage movie. The light bouncing off of the blonde-haired boy was so bright, it caused everyone around him to squint and move away. What made it worse was that every window had sunlight shining through it so there wasn't anywhere he could sit and not be in the spotlight so to speak.

"Wow, Malfoy! I knew you were a bright boy but this is taking things to a whole new level!"

"I didn't know that the Disco Revolution was back, who's got the funk?"

"Hey Draco, the Ministry Party Commission called, they want their New Year Ball back!"

On and on the jibes went, causing said target to grow red in the face and the promise that 'wait until my father hears about this' was repeatedly heard over the breakfasting din. The Gryffindors were hooting and howling their laughter while the Ravenclaws were whispering amongst themselves the sort of charms needed to pull something like this off while the Puffs were just shaking their heads in bemusement (and some amusement.) The Weasley Twins were heard denying that they had any involvement in this but wished they had been included. Severus strode down to where Malfoy was sitting and urged him to the Infirmary to get checked over then stepped over to where Harry was sitting and stuffing a large piece of pancake into his mouth.

"Potter," he sneered, "I know you had something to do with this."

"Mmprhy." Harry mumbled around his mouth full of pancake while pointing at Hermione. The girl in question looked up at Severus with as innocent a look as possible.

Severus cocked his head, "Miss Granger? Is there something you wish to admit to?"

Placing her hand on her chest, she replied with wide 'innocent' eyes, "Admit to? No. Wish I had the ability to pull something like this off? Yes." Harry was barely able to keep himself from choking on his breakfast. Severus just shook his head and looked towards the ceiling for divine guidance.

"Personally, professor; I would suspect one of the boys that Draco shares a dorm with. I've had my eye on either Theo or even one of Malfoy's bodyguards. Who would ever suspect Crabbe or Goyle from doing something so dastardly?"

Severus snorted, "Crabbe and Goyle barely have a brain cell to share between the two of them. There's no way they'd be able to do this."

Harry piped up, "Are you sure? Look at their faces, they're smug." Severus did indeed turn and examine the two boys in question and sure enough, both boys looked smug.

Severus was understandably surprised, "I…never would've guessed it. But those two don't have the brewing talents to pull this off. It wasn't a charm on Mr. Malfoy, I checked." He resumed his glare at Harry who finally admitted to brewing the potion.

"But I didn't give it to them, they asked me."

"Uh-huh." One final glare and Severus stormed off to go see to the disposition of his student.

At the Teacher's Table…

Albus glared at Harry even though he wasn't able to identify him, at least verbally. He knew deep in his heart that this was the boy that caused him all of his most recent troubles and that his family was responsible for that damned court case. But for the life of him, he just couldn't figure out the names of the people responsible. It was maddening! He'd tried going to a random student to get them to give him the name of the boy but the gibberish thing kicked in again. He even tried drawing a picture but it looked more like a child's drawing of a six-legged troll with curly horns than an actual person. 'I'll have my revenge someday and when that day comes, all will bow down before my wisdom and anger!'