Chapter 8

"Wow," Tony said.

"Wow," Tim echoed, softly.

Right before their eyes, the clouds were lifting. The clouds that had plagued them all day yesterday and still during their hike today were disappearing, revealing...

"Mountains," Tony said.

The mountains were soaring above their heads. Even though he had known that there had to be mountains all around, because he couldn't see them, Tony had just mentally seen the mountains as ending where the clouds were.

But that was wrong. The mountains were there, and more could be seen of them all the time.

And they were amazing.

Tony couldn't tear his eyes away from the mountains that were being revealed by the lifting clouds. They were absolutely stunning. The six glaciers could be seen, tucked into a curve of the mountains. Large swaths of snow covered the area. The mountains all around them could be seen.

And suddenly, Tony almost felt like crying. In fact, he felt his throat tighten ominously. He wasn't sure why in the world seeing mountains was bringing him close to tears, no matter how beautiful, but it was.

"So there really were mountains here all along," Tim said. "This is beautiful."

He pulled out his camera and started taking picture after picture. Tony just stood there for a while, looking around at the ever more amazing view.

"Tony?"

Finally, Tony tore his eyes away from the mountains and looked at Tim. Tim actually seemed a little concerned.

"Are you all right?" Tim asked.

"Yeah. Why?"

"You seem more... affected by the view than I thought you would be."

Tony forced a smile. "I was starting to think that Canada was conspiring to make us think there were mountains up there."

Tim laughed a little, but Tony could tell he hadn't fooled him. Still, Tim didn't say anything more about it. Instead, they both took pictures and walked further away from the teahouse so that they could see more of the view. There were a few lingering clouds, but they were lifting. In fact, the sun was shining brightly down on them, making the snow sparkle. It was a dazzling sight.

They found a bench and sat down, side by side, just to enjoy what they were seeing. It was like the whole world had changed. They weren't even in the same place as they had been. There was no way to truly describe how different things looked with the clouds gone.

And suddenly, Tony knew why it had touched him so much. He took a breath and let it out.

"I was feeling like...if this road trip went bad..." He stopped. He didn't really want to be explicit and so he skipped to the conclusion. "And so having the clouds go away, means that it's not bad. So maybe it'll be good."

Tim looked over at him, but Tony kept looking out at the mountains. He felt a little embarrassed by his confession, as abbreviated as it was.

"Tony, I already told you that you don't have anything to worry about."

"I know."

"Then, why won't you believe me?"

"I don't know."

Tim put a hand on Tony's shoulder and squeezed it.

"Tony, you don't lose family unless you really want to. The people who lose their families aren't willing to fight for them. I'm not talking about when people die. You don't lose your family when they die. You just don't have them with you."

Tony felt Tim's grip on his shoulder tighten and then Tim was turning him away from the mountains. He didn't really want to make eye contact at the moment, though. He didn't want to have to face Tim head-on. He was as embarrassed about his feelings as he was worried.

Still, it was worse to refuse to make eye contact so he looked at Tim and he saw that Tim was concerned, but there was also sympathy in his eyes.

"Tony, it's okay. Really. I know how it feels to be embarrassed by your emotions. And really..." Tim stopped for a moment and he actually smiled a little. "Really... I'm a little... flattered."

"Flattered?" Tony asked, furrowing his brow.

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"That our friendship matters enough to you that you'd be this worried."

"Tim, haven't you been paying attention?" Tony asked. "You're my family."

"I know, but... but you have a family besides me. You have Jo and your kids. And I know her parents love you. I just... It's strange to me that I'd be so important."

"Well, you are," Tony said.

Tim smiled and let him go. He gestured at the gorgeous mountain scenery around them.

"This is amazing, Tony," he said. "It really is, but if the clouds had stayed without lifting, I wouldn't even think of taking back being your family. To me, all this is just amazing and beautiful. It has nothing to do with us being friends or even us being family. It's just that I didn't think that it could look this cool. You're stuck with me... unless you change your mind and you know that I would understand if you did."

Tony slugged Tim gently on the arm.

"Don't even start thinking that way, Tim. That's not in the cards."

"Okay, but you know it's an option."

"No, it's not," Tony said. "Who would I put in your place?"

Tim grinned. "Jimmy?"

"No. Jimmy and Breena are friends, but they're not family," Tony said.

Neither of them mentioned Gibbs. For the same reason. But there was a bit of a pause and then, they moved on.

"Seriously, Tony," Tim said, "don't worry about it. You're part of my family and that's not going to change unless you want it to."

"I came close to doing it, you know," Tony said. "Even if I didn't want to, I came close to ruining things last year with what I said to you."

Tim shook his head. "No. Even with all that stuff last year... it still wasn't about whether or not you were my family. That never even crossed my mind. Most of my problems were about..." Tim stopped for a moment and seemed to be wrestling with himself a bit. Then, he sighed. "Most of my problems are about making things too hard for you, about not letting you feel like you have to fix my problems...because they can't be fixed. Not really. Not completely. I wish they could. I really wish they could, but they can't." He sighed again. "And when it comes to you, my major issue is about what falls on you, the things I can't stop. ...but it was never about whether or not you were somehow worthy or not worthy of being my family. Tony, you always are. Family isn't about everyone being perfect because that never happens. It's about belonging...and you do."

It didn't matter that Tim had said it before. It didn't matter that Tim's view of Tony's place in his family was nothing new. Tony felt more touched than ever that Tim wanted him to be a part of his family, especially after what had happened last year, something that Tony still heartily regretted. And against his will, he got a little teary, although he didn't actually start crying.

"Thanks, man," he said, softly.

Then, he leaned over and gave Tim a side-arm hug.

"Anytime," Tim said.

Tony let Tim go and wiped at his eyes, trying to get back to normal again.

"Okay, let's get back down the mountain and decide where else to go today," he said, more in his usual vein...almost. He did try to move on from his worry and mostly succeeded.

Tim patted his back and nodded, clearly moving on as well.

"It'll be like a whole new hike going back down. With all the mountains visible, it'll seem like a totally different place."

"That's for sure," Tony said.

They both stood up and started back toward the trail. But they stopped a number of times to take pictures. They both posed, pointing up at the mountains with only slightly exaggerated expressions of awe. They got a picture together with the mountains soaring up behind them. They took pictures toward Lake Louise. They took pictures looking back up the valley. They took pictures of the river, flowing down to Lake Louise. They took pictures everywhere. While they had only taken a few on the hike up, on the hike down, they were constantly wanting to take pictures. They saw the same three sisters on the way down and they waved at each other in passing, but they still kept going back to the mountains they could see.

Finally, they were back down to the lake, basking in the bright sunshine and clear skies.

"Okay, Tim, we have to take a picture looking across the lake now that we can see everything," Tony said.

"Absolutely," Tim said, nodding. He kept looking back over his shoulders at the view. Even if he wasn't giving the change in scene the same importance that Tony had given it, he was clearly entranced by the new scenery.

Finally, Tony grabbed his arm and started tugging him along the path. Tim shook off his grip but smiled and kept walking. They walked around the lake, back to the same viewpoint that they'd been at only a few hours before. There were a lot of people taking pictures. And the view had changed dramatically. Now, they were seeing the view they had been wanting to see. Now, they had the bright blue of Lake Louise and the mountains framing it. Now, they were seeing it.

And it was amazing.

After taking many new pictures, they finally tore their eyes away from the view of Lake Louise.

"Okay, what now?" Tim asked.

"I don't know, but something spectacular," Tony said.

"I think we've already got that," Tim said, gesturing at the lake.

"Then, something as spectacular or more spectacular," Tony said.

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Let's get back to the car and check out the brochures."

"All right."

They headed back to the parking lot, quickly stopping for a bathroom break before getting to the car. Then, they pulled out their information and started looking.

But only for a minute or two.

"Lake Moraine," Tim said, pointing. "That's got to be spectacular."

"Why?"

"The description says it's unreal and 'iconically jaw-dropping'," Tim said.

"Well, that's convinced me. Let's go. We can eat some granola on our way," Tony said. "I'll drive. You navigate."

"Okay."

"Am I going back to the Trans-Canada Highway?"

"No. Get onto Lake Louise Drive and you should see a sign for Moraine Lake Road on the right. A mile or two from here, but you'll be on the road for a few miles up the mountain."

"Oh, no. Switchbacks?" Tony asked.

"Not really, no. It looks like it shouldn't be too bad."

"Are you sure?"

Tim laughed. "No, I'm not, but looking at the map, I don't think so."

"All right. I'll take your word for it."

"That's dangerous," Tim said, grinning.

Tony shook his head and started driving. As Tim had said, the road was up a mountain, but it really wasn't too bad. It was wide enough and there wasn't too much of an issue.

...until they reached the Moraine Lake parking lot.

It was packed full. Cars were parked along the road almost a quarter mile down. It was now the middle of the day and all the tourists were out in full force, especially with the beautiful clear skies they were currently enjoying.

"Wow. Popular stop," Tim said. "Do you want to give up on it and try tomorrow?"

"No. We can't do that. The weather is perfect right now!" Tony said. "What if the clouds come back in the morning? Let's just look for a place to park and we can walk."

"Okay."

They drove up and down the road twice before catching someone pulling out of a place on the road. They quickly took the spot and got out of the car, joining a number of other people walking along the road to the parking lot and then to the lake.

When they got to the parking lot, they followed a trail that led them to an overlook. It was an easy walk to a rocky outcropping. Lots of people were crowded together all taking pictures of the same thing.

The lake.

Lake Louise had been beautiful, and the change with the lifting clouds had been amazing.

Moraine Lake was stunning. Gorgeous.

"Wow," Tim said. "It really is turquoise. And it's just because of light reflecting off of sediments. Wow."

There was no question that Moraine Lake was in a class by itself as far as color was concerned. No photographer, no matter how incompetent, would need to photoshop this.

"I agree with the description," Tim said. "It looks unreal. I can't believe how beautiful this is."

Tony nodded silently. It was amazing and he truly had no words for it. With all his worries, even if Tim wasn't going to hold the weather against him, there was just something extra special about seeing something so absolutely beautiful.

They took pictures of each other. They got someone to take pictures of them together. Then, they took pictures of the lake from different angles, from the same angle, over and over. It was just that beautiful. They had plenty of duplicates to choose from.

They stayed at the lake for well over an hour just enjoying the view, but then, it was getting on in the afternoon and so they finally tore themselves away from the view of the lake and walked back to the parking lot...and then back to the car on the road. Tim drove this time and they pulled out and drove back down to Lake Louise Drive and from there back to the Trans-Canada Highway and headed back toward Banff.

"Well, what now?" Tim asked as they drove.

"I'm all for getting an early dinner in Banff and then relaxing," Tony said.

"Are you sure? It's still pretty early," Tim said.

"Unless you want to do something," Tony said. "Honestly, I like this not being in a rush thing. Maybe I really am getting old."

Tim grinned. "Should we bring up the big five-oh?"

"No. I'm not there yet, so we don't need to bring it up," Tony said, sternly, but he smiled. "I never expected to have a four-year-old in my forties, you know. I figured by this point, if I had kids, they'd all be older. Teenagers at least."

"Yeah, me, too," Tim admitted. "We both got a little bit of a later start. But I'm okay with what I've got."

"So am I," Tony said.

Then, Tim got that look on his face. Tony knew what was coming.

"Are you doing all right with all that?" Tim asked, a little hesitantly.

"Yeah. I still have my days, but I'm... getting to the point where I'll tell Jo and she helps me out."

"Good."

"And if Daniel doesn't decide to become a psychologist or something like that, he'll be wasting his skills. He just seems to know," Tony added. "It's kind of sad in a way. He had to learn how to read people because of how many times they hurt him, but he's using that now and it's good that he does."

"Yeah, Tommy told me that Daniel called and talked to him about this trip," Tim said. "I was surprised."

"So was I."

Then, Tony looked over at Tim.

"Do you mind?"

Tim smiled but kept his eyes on the road.

"No. I don't."

"Good."

When they reached Banff, they decided that they needed pizza and even though they were in Canada, there was a place called Boston Pizza, a Canadian chain, although when they looked it up, there were some restaurants in the U.S. as well. But neither Tim nor Tony had ever been to one before. They got the pizza to go and took it back to their room. It was a very good pizza and they ate the whole thing between the two of them.

They both showered and then they spent the rest of the evening watching TV. Maybe it wasn't taking advantage of where they were, but it gave them both some nice downtime and Tony was glad to have a slower evening. They both called home as well and decided to go to bed early. It had been a full day, even if it had been shorter, and as he lay on the pullout, Tony felt like it would be hard to top today, no matter what else they saw or what else they did. They had talked and they had also had fun.

He just hoped they could keep having fun throughout the rest of the week.