Compartmentalizing You

Chapter 8

Her back arched, spasms rippling through her. The back of her head dug into Catra's lap. Her neck craning backwards, her jugular veins becoming pronounced with the effort. Blonde hair cascaded off her shoulders and onto the floor, her hair band had become a forgotten thought. Suddenly, her eyelids snapped open and cerulean eyes met heterochromatic ones in a stunning moment of clarity. "I wish you were real. I wish you were here." The words came out in a hoarse whisper, her vocal cords strained from screaming. Blood dribbled from her lips, as Catra unconsciously tried to wipe it away. But succeeded in only smearing it across her cheek.

Understanding flashed briefly while Catra whispered her reassurances that she was indeed real. Yet, that second of lucidity dissipated as Adora's eyes dulled before they rolled into the back of her head. Following, every muscle inside her went completely limp, a beautiful visage of a perfectly pacified porcelain.

Catra cupped her face and gently thumbed away the tears that leaked from the corner of her closed eyes. Why is she crying? Pondering, she brushed away stray locks that stuck to Adora's face as she bent herself over the unconscious woman's prone form. Planting a soft kiss on her sweating forehead, Catra felt her insides churning. The memory of Adora screaming for her, pleading for her to help her as she fought enemies Catra could not see. Enemies that she knew were haunting her in places Catra could not reach.

"Let me help you." She whispered as she began to hoist Adora into her arms. It shocked her how light the warrior had become, her body a motley bag of thin, disjointed pieces strung together by her taunt flesh. To think that this was the same body that once could wield the power of Etheria, an unquantifiable strength unparalleled, not even the might of Horde Prime could rival her. Oh, Little Sister, why do you hold on to what will break you? His voice cooed softly, the dredges of his mind forever present. A poison she had struggled to explain, Adora hadn't believed her. The hero arrogantly believing she could mend all of Catra's scars, her love a balm that could ease the sting of her memories.

Adora's love was cruel, it glossed over the pain with perfect skies and perfect lies. She had a way of redirecting everything from the feline's vulnerabilities towards the future, towards the struggle of doing better. "When we get older, I won't let anyone hurt you anymore. I just need to get stronger." An ignorant promise. Her fallacy was always in the way she deluded herself. The blonde had always believed through her sheer power, everyone around her would never experience the lessons life had to give. Catra knew then as she knew now, that this broken woman would and had exhumed herself of all the hope she had to give. Robbed herself of the will she needed to live in the ways she surgically removed the ability to want. That if she sacrificed her time, her love, her body then that was enough. That the happiness of others was as best as she could do. What she never considered was that sacrificing her love meant sacrificing them. The concept of them being together could not exist as long Adora denied her wants and needs. Catra understood this. Adora did not.

These thoughts hung heavily in her mind as the feline woman carried Etheria's hero through the dimly lit halls of She-ra's fortress, in search of a room, or at most, furniture. Anything to lay this broken doll down on- that wasn't the floor. Yet, as she walked through the hallways, Catra noticed with increasing annoyance that everything looked the same. Every hallway and every room, a perfect resemblance to the last. Where the only piece of furniture to be found was a bed frame without a mattress and a table without a chair.

I fucking hate these magical places. Of course, they would half-ass their furniture, they half-assed everything else. Its why Adora and I are in this fucking mess. Fucking magical sword and this fucking martyr-obssessed idiot. Sighing, she set Adora down on the bedframe, mindful of Adora's protruding shoulder that she knew was dislocated. Catra wedged herself between the head board and Adora so that she could place the blonde woman's head onto her thigh so that her head could be cushioned. Yet, as soon as she settled down, Catra really began to take stock of Adora's appearance and what she saw made her fur stand on end.

Adora's typically pristine face was twisted into a swollen mess of blood and bruises. Her split chin, her nasty shiner and the unrecognizable shape of her nose were now a perfectly purple plume of smashed cartilage that spread from cheek to cheek. Fur prickling, Catra forced herself to continue her examination of Adora's wounds, internally she knew that Adora had seen worse days when they were children. Beyond the dislocated shoulder and the dozens of bush scratches, Adora's most damaging wound was the identical injury she bore on her hands. Leaning forward, Catra carefully picked up Adora's hand to closely examine it, yet, as soon as she saw the bits of bone buried in her flesh, Catra immediately let go. Adora's hands were a mangled spectacle of bloated twisted fingers and bone shrapnel -that Catra presumed were from the man Adora had killed.

The existence of the teeth brought reality slamming back into Catra as she was no longer able to deny that the woman before her wasn't the killer of that innocent Bright Moon man. Throat tightening in anxiety as her thoughts started to rush in on her, Catra untangled herself from Adora to climb to her feet. Yet, as soon as she stood, her vision swam as her legs gave out beneath her. Overcome with a sudden wave of nausea, Catra began retching onto the floor, immediately purging herself of the breakfast she had had with Bow.

She killed him, I can't even deny it. Catra continued to dry heave as sweat dripped from her brow onto the floor. Her body shook with just enough effort that her hair band dislodged itself and fell into the puddle of vomit. Swathed in her hair, Catra stared unseeingly at the floor as she tried to make sense of the noise in her head. Fucking Etheria, she really is a fugutive. They'll kill her if they catch her. What am I gonna do? Nausea subsiding, Catra sat back onto her heels and leaned her back against the bed frame, completely spent. Closing her eyes, she breathed in slowly and tilted her head back. A sudden brush of flesh across her face caused her to snap her eyes back open as Adora's hand unconsciously tried to grip her fur. Yet, the effort was wasted as her hand went limp once more.

Feeling a wave of calm from the contact, Catra gently gripped Adora's hand and gave it a slight squeeze. The act- a fashioned condition from when they were children. Catra had always felt a compulsive need to touch Adora, even if they were angry with one another. A fact that never went unnoticed by the two, even when Adora was fighting Catra as She-ra during the war. Bringing the broken hand to her face, Catra rubbed her cheek against Adora's wrist to avoid causing any pain. This isn't Adora. She's never done this before. There has to be something going on that caused Adora to act like that. I've just got to explain to Sparkles that this isn't Adora's fault, that something is controlling her, making her behave this way. This isn't my Adora.

A burst of possession sparked inside of Catra's chest as hope flared through her. Yes, I just gotta get Sparkles to understand. But first, Adora needs to rest up and heal. That way I can talk to her about what happened. Confident in having formulated some sort of plan, Catra got up and decided to look around the Crystal Castle in hopes of finding food and medical supplies. Catra vaguely remembered that the castle was once the base of operations for Adora during the war but after the destruction of the AI, it had been forgotten. Yet, Catra suspected that Adora probably had supplies laying around since her companion had always been the prepared planner. She just was never one for furniture. Catra mused as she made her way out of the room in search of bandages.

[CHANGE IN POV]

"You realize what you're asking of me is treason, right Advisor Bow?" Pessimis chuckled to himself, his head bent downwards to conceal his face from the light of the pyre. Despite his fall in status, Pessimis looked more arrogant than ever with his face poorly concealing his snaggle toothed smirk. Bow cringed inwardly, hating himself for plotting with the man he deplored most but with his mind set, he knew what he was doing was right. Since Glimmer couldn't be reasoned with, he needed to make her understand what she was doing was wrong. His sole job was to guide her and she was making him incapable of completing his one duty. Advisors existed within the kingdom to represent the will of the people, to balance the power of the monarch but when the monarch subverted the advisors guidance, they had to become creative in their guidance methods. Working with Pessimis was Bow's way of 'creative guidance'.

"Of course, Pessimis! But what we are doing here is bigger than my head, it's for the safety of Etheria, of Glimmer! Adora is clearly unable to control herself and she is a threat equal to that of Horde Prime." Bow snarled, unamused of Pessimis' dry banter. While Bow was more than beside himself with joy that the man no longer worked on the Council of Advisors, he begrudgingly admitted to himself that Pessimis was the only one with the resources he needed, he could trust. There weren't many in the kingdom that had connections from prior to the war. Most of Bright Moon was still very young which meant that the mass population of the kingdom had spent the majority of their lives isolated from the other kingdoms due to the Horde destroying communication networks and seizing main trade routes. Pessimis was one of few that could network his way into the other kingdoms which meant Bow had a system of communication that existed outside of Glimmer's knowledge and control.

"She-ra needs to be disposed of. We cannot have peace as long as she exists. Her power alone can destroy any of the kingdoms' of Etheria's armies! We should gather the other kingdoms and hunt her down!" Pessimis rambled, his eyes going wide in excitement. Bow knew that Pessimis had despised Adora the moment that Queen Angella had given her asylum. He hated her because of her history with the Horde. Bow could guess the details of the aged man's story but no one who knew the tale was alive to tell it.

Turning to face him, Bow stared down his chest at him. Hoping to intimidate Pessimis, Bow hardened his expression and hissed, "You listen here, all I need you to do is to deliver a message to the Princesses of the other kingdoms and alert them of Adora's status as a fugitive. I don't care how you do it, just get it done!" Pessimis merely glanced back at Bow bemused and gave a brief nod lit with all the smugness the old man could muster before he stepped back and disappeared into the forest.

Bow felt relief blossom in his chest as the forest swallowed Pessimis into its dark depths. Turning back towards the smoldering pyre, Bow noticed not many remained but the parents and the children of the victims. They stood apart from one another, alone in their suffering. Seeing the pain written in their faces, Bow promised himself that justice needed to be delivered. Adora needed to stand trial for her crimes regardless of her history as the kingdom's hero. The people could not be at peace if the remnants of the war were still terrorizing them. They needed justice after all of the unjust destruction the war had brought to their lives- to his life.

Bow knew that Glimmer would never understand. The war may have robbed her of her mother and temporarily her father but truly, she had never known the real suffering that the war had caused. The pain that is brought on by the absolute annihilation of one's home. Nor could she fathom the anger of unserved justice and the depths of sorrow that is left when all that is familiar has completely vanished. Yes, it is my duty to see that Bright Moon gets its justice for what has happened here today.

[END OF CHAPTER]

Sorry for the wait guys! Hoped you liked it! Leave a review and let me know what you think!