AN: Happy Smutty Saturday! Unfortunately, this chapter fails to deliver on the smut, but I really like it anyway. In fact, it's one of my favourites so far. I hope you like it too. If you do, please feel free to let me know and if you don't, of course, my messages are open to you too, just don't forget to be kind and be constructive.

Adenei, be11a and cheesy are the best (and thirstiest) betas in the world. This story would be NOTHING without their comments.

I hope you enjoy! Have a lovely weekend and I hope the sun is shining where you are xxx

The group pack their bags and head off to the Quidditch World Cup to see Ginny play. Fortunately, there won't be any Death Eaters at this one, but there will still be a wizard duel and at least one person will get hurt. The question is, who?

I know you like me (I know you like me)
I know you do (I know you do)
That's why whenever I come around
She's all over you
And I know you want it (I know you want it)
It's easy to see (it's easy to see)
And in the back of your mind I know
You should be on with me

- Don't Cha, The Pussycat Dolls (2005)

Ron

Having sex with Hermione was fucking brilliant, and once we got the ball rolling on our friends with benefits agreement, we just couldn't stop. We started doing it everywhere, at all hours of the day and night.

And she was pretty demanding, too, not that I could ever deny her anything. She would send me a text, and just like that, I'd be on my way to see her. It didn't matter what I was doing. Of course, it was reciprocal, although she was a lot busier than me and turned me down more times than I did her. One time, I texted her after a late night of drinking at The Greenhouse, and she invited me to join her at St Mungo's. Let's just say she gave me a thorough examination.

The beauty of magic meant that once we'd updated the wards around our houses, we were able to apparate in and out of each other's bedrooms without our housemates learning what was going on. I don't know how muggles coped—it must be a lot harder to sneak around when you have to ring a doorbell or traipse through a living area to get to someone's room.

Of course, Harry knew about us, but he'd been pretty discreet around the house so that Hermione wouldn't catch on. Sometimes he was alright for a best mate. Hermione and I mostly stuck to my place because of it. The arrangement worked well for me as I was keen to avoid any awkward conversations with my sister about why I was rummaging around her flat at an obscure hour of the morning.

The situation rolled on for a few months without any hiccups. Hermione and I saw each other at least a couple of times a week, sometimes more. Neither of us seemed to be getting bored of each other either, which was good. And even though she still wouldn't hang out with me during the day or do anything with me but have sex, I knew that she'd be at the upcoming Quidditch World Cup, and then I'd have the whole weekend to hang out with her. I was so excited that every time I thought about it, those flobberworms escaped into my stomach again, and a huge grin erupted on my face. Harry called it sickening.

The long-awaited weekend finally came around. True to her promise, Ginny led the English team to a magnificent win at the quarter-finals, meaning England would be playing Bulgaria. It would make the whole event extra special. All of my family would be there, including my brother Charlie, who was off working on a dragon sanctuary in Romania.

Despite the early hour, Harry and I were in high spirits as we made our way to the nearest portkey spot. Living in London meant there was already a long queue of people waiting to make their way to Dartmoor. We took our place, chatting amicably about Quidditch stats as we sipped from takeaway coffee cups.

"So, Hermione has been around a lot recently," Harry shoved his spare hand in his pocket, his attention fixed firmly on the back of the person in front of us.

"Yeah, we prefer my place cos I still feel a little weirded out about visiting my sister's flat to shag my booty call. Is it a problem? Don't tell me she's been stealing your food? She's a menace!"

"No, it's not that. I barely have anything in the cupboards anyway. It's just…" Harry sighed. "You two can be quite loud sometimes, and you don't always remember to use a Muffliato charm."

Harry was so desperate not to make eye contact with me, and I could see the blush creeping over his face. I couldn't help but laugh. What were we? 16? Actually, scratch that. We all know how good my chat-up attempts were when I was that age. There was no way I could get myself into this sort of situation.

Harry was the guy I talked to about everything with, and all of a sudden, he's standing in front of me, blushing like a princess because I have noisy sex and sometimes forget to silence my room. It was like being back at Hogwarts, although there were never any girls in our dormitories back then.

"Are we keeping you awake?" I took his empty cup from him to chuck it into a nearby bin with mine.

"Sometimes. It's a little strange being woken up to the sound of your grunts, too." Harry scowled. "And you know I get nightmares, so that makes it a hundred times worse!"

"Ah, sorry, mate." I'd forgotten about the slightly traumatising experiences Harry had when he was younger when a deranged evil wizard tried to kill him almost annually. I only felt a little bit guilty, though; I suffered just as much during those times. "I'll try and remember to do the charm when we do the others."

"Or before—"

"Or before," I nodded in agreement. "I forgot how much it sucks when you're single and everyone else in the house is getting it on!"

Harry whacked me across the head before the smirk had a chance to appear on my face.

"About me being single. I meant to talk to you about it…"

"Yeah?" I tried not to look too surprised. "Have you found someone? Or are you going to confess to fancying Hermione next?"

"No, no way!" Harry pulled a face, and I tried not to be too offended on Hermione's behalf. "Ginny is going to be here this weekend, isn't she?"

"Yeah, she's playing Chaser."

"Well, I was just wondering if maybe you would mind if I asked her out?"

The queue moved up, but I was frozen to my spot, wholly amazed by Harry. Sure, I knew he'd harboured a soft spot for her over the years, but those feelings seemed to come and go depending on how much he'd seen her. He'd never acted on them, so I just figured he was finally over it.

I must have taken too long to answer, as a scowl appeared on Harry's face. "Actually, do you know what? Forget about it!"

It was our turn to use the portkey, so I followed him, still dumbfounded. My brain was still trying to process his question as I laid my finger on the empty McDonald's carton and felt the familiar yank around my navel. Suddenly, we were spinning through the air towards our next destination.

As soon as we'd landed on the Moors and got our bearings, Harry stormed off. I knew straight away I'd fucked up in waiting too long to answer and needed to do something quickly to make it up to him. There would have been a time where I would have hated the thought of him with my sister, but he'd done a lot of growing up over the years that I'd known him, and I was starting to warm to the idea.

Better Harry than that dick Michael Corner.

"Harry, wait up!" I ran to catch up to him, the rucksack on my back jostling in time with my strides. As soon as I reached him, I grabbed him by the shoulder and spun him around. His face was clouded over, and I knew I was probably moments away from a massive Harry-angst moment.

"I think it's a good idea. You know, you and Ginny. As long as you don't mess her around or break her heart."

"I won't, I promise."

"Good! Then, yeah, go for it. Just don't forget to use Muffliato!" Harry laughed, and I knew I'd patched things up for now.

I looped my arm around his shoulder as we followed my mum's instructions to the campsite. Everything was free this weekend, courtesy of my fantastic sister. My parents had decided to make a long weekend of it and had travelled to Dartmoor Wednesday, but my siblings and I had made a pact not to turn up until Friday, just in case. There was safety in numbers, after all.

My mum called us over, and after a brief hug, during which she fussed over Harry more than me, I dumped our stuff in the nearest available space. Soon we were chatting away as we unpacked the tent whilst trying to work out who had already turned up.

I was sorting out the pegs when I heard a giggle from the canvas next to our spot. A dark-skinned man stepped out, followed by Hermione. I felt a somersault of annoyance, followed by a lurch of excitement. Ever since I'd started sleeping with her, I'd never felt such a wide range of emotions, sometimes one after the other. It was enough to give a guy whiplash.

"Hi, Harry. Hi, Ron!" Dick-head Dean spotted us first and waved as he made his way over to us. "Trouble with the tent?"

"No. We're absolutely fine, thank you!" I was distracted by the sight of Hermione in just a pair of cut-off shorts and a vest, and Harry chose that opportunity to hit me in the head with a tent pole.

Dean raised his eyebrows. "You know, there's a charm that will put the tent up with a flick of your wand." He pulled his out of his pocket and rolled up his sleeves. "Stand back then."

We did as we were told, Harry throwing a curious look at me. I could already feel my good mood fading. A weekend with this tosser was going to be a ballache.

With our tent now erected, thanks to Dean, Harry and I were free to unpack. Just as I was about to head in, Hermione grabbed me by the arm.

"Hey, you okay?"

"Yeah, I just didn't know you were bringing Dean along?" I knew I sounded like a petulant child; I just didn't care.

She raised her eyebrows at me. "Padma couldn't come. Seamus invited him."

"So what, you're going to be sharing a tent with two men?"

"Is that a problem? Keep in mind that Seamus appreciates your backside as much as I do…"

"No, I guess not!" I kicked at a clump of grass. "Does Dean appreciate my backside as much as you do?" I lifted my head, risking a smile at Hermione. Luckily, she laughed.

"No, but I think he might like mine!" She wriggled her eyebrows at me, "But I wouldn't worry about that."

My good mood was back, fuelled by her excellent sense of humour. She laid a hand on my lower arm and squeezed it. Just that tiny amount of contact was enough to send all the blood in my body southwards.

"Do you fancy going for a walk, check out the woods?" I asked hopefully. It might be a chance to put one of my newest fantasies of her into practice.

"I don't think that's a good idea this weekend, Ron." In Hermione's defence, she looked regretful, so I pushed the feeling of disappointment out of my head. "It's just there are far too many people around. We're bound to get caught. I was on shift all night last night, so I'm just going to sunbathe and read for a while, then get an early night so I can enjoy tomorrow properly."

"Oh, yeah, sure, that's fine. I'm sure my brothers will want to hang out anyway." I shoved my hands in my pocket, my cheek muscles aching from the force of keeping a smile on my face. I trusted her, we'd promised not to lie to each other after all, but it didn't mean I wasn't just a tiny bit gutted.

"Cool, see you later then." She waved once, then disappeared back into her tent.

This was going to be a long weekend.

⁂

By the time my brothers showed up, with their wives and five hundred children, my sour mood had disappeared. Wanting to respect Hermione's wishes and not be downright annoying, I spent most of the afternoon with them and Harry, catching up with a few beers. The combination of having some decent family time and the sunshine meant that pretty soon, I was in high spirits again. And to make it even better, my parents managed to keep their hands off each other, too.

I bloody loved Quidditch, so my slight hangover did nothing to quell my enthusiasm as we marched en masse to the stadium the following day. I tried my hardest to engineer things so that I could sit next to Hermione, but at the last minute, Dean called her to him, and I lost my opportunity.

He's such a prick.

I had a good view of her from where I was sitting, but fortunately, I found myself distracted by the game. Although I wanted England to win, my favourite Seeker was playing for Bulgaria: Viktor Krum. I'd never had a chance to see him play live, and I found myself on the edge of my seat for the entire eight-hour game.

In the end, Bulgaria took the win by getting to the snitch before England, but it did nothing to dampen our spirits as we followed the crowds back to our campsite. My sister played a blinder of a game and had won the player of the match award to boot. I'd never been so proud of her.

When we got back to our pitch, my dad had the great idea of pooling all our booze and food supplies and getting a campfire going. It turned into a good party. Eventually, Ginny joined us too, once she'd finished with all her team stuff.

I helped my dad get the fire going, then got settled in a cosy spot where I could see across the whole site. I loved people-watching; it was one of my favourite things to do. Harry and Ginny were chatting animatedly while preparing the meat to put on the fire, and I had to hand it to my best mate; he worked quickly. Maybe I should start asking him for some pointers.

I didn't want to creep on them for too long, so I let my eyes travel from the fire, finally settling at the table where Hermione was preparing some more food with Dean. I felt a slight lurch of jealousy. They had been attached at the hip all weekend, and I was starting to get annoyed by it.

Dean must have said something funny, although I don't know how someone so straightlaced knew how to joke. Hermione threw her head back, letting her curls cascade to the top of her jeans, baring the stunning curve of her neck to Dean. Although I regularly left my mark on the skin, she would often Episkey it off before she left me. I should have put a stop to that.

You could see why I was feeling intimidated. Although this was the first time we'd been in a social situation together since we were twenty-five, I'd never seen Hermione flirt with anyone this way. My stomach tied in knots and I felt my good mood once again completely waning.

Already five beers in and my inhibitions forgotten, I dug my phone out of my pocket and fired a text her way:

He has really small hands.

I fixed my eyes firmly on her as she picked her phone up from the table and read it. She glanced my way, and I took great pains to make sure I didn't flinch as her gaze locked with mine. I hoped I looked as thunderous as I felt. I was not happy, and I wanted her to know that.

She swiped her thumb across the screen, not even looking guilty as she dismissed the message, put her phone screen down on the table and turned straight back to Dean. She laughed again, placing her hand on his arm tenderly.

What a witch.

The jealous beast inside me thumped its tail against my ribcage, and I worried I was going to be sick. My beer bottle was also empty, so I pushed myself out of my chair to get another. Bill waylaid me as I fumbled my way back to my seat, but I was happy for the distraction. There was no way I was going to cheer up this evening, not unless Hermione threw herself down in front of me, but I was hoping that my brothers could at least make the night a little more bearable.

⁂

The sky started to turn dark as I made my way around the group, spending time with everyone whilst occasionally taking sneaky glances at Hermione and Dean, just to make sure they hadn't run off to shag. Unfortunately, avoiding them meant I ended up avoiding Harry as well since they'd all started to sit together. I probably could have joined them, but being that close to Hermione and Dean would have been torture to me.

Eventually, I once again found myself alone, although it didn't last long as Hermione appeared in front of me.

"Come and take a walk with me."

It wasn't an invite; it was an order. I was in such a foul mood by then that I contemplated refusing, but she raised her eyebrows in that adorable way, and I knew there was no way I could turn her down. Sighing, I got to my feet and followed her away from our tents.

All around us, parties were raging on. Hermione waited until we were out of earshot of our camping pitch before starting to speak.

"What was that text message about?" She didn't stop walking, but she turned her head to look at me. I itched to take her hand and lace our fingers together, but I knew there was no way she would let me do that, especially if I'd pissed her off.

"What text message?" I decided to play innocent for now.

"He has small hands." She rolled her eyes. "Are you jealous of Dean?"

"Dean?" I scoffed, but my cheeks started to burn. I was grateful we'd walked far enough to be out of the light from the tents, although I was pretty sure my blush could illuminate the whole of Dartmoor right now. I didn't want her to see what she was doing to me. "Of course I'm not jealous of him!"

That was two of our rules I'd broken today.

"Look, Ron. Even if I did fancy him, even if I wanted something to happen between him and me, it wouldn't change what we're doing. Not without speaking to you about it first. We're supposed to have open communication, remember?"

"Oh, so you do like him then?" Once again, a jealous feeling bubbled low in my stomach, but I tried my best to ignore it.

"Ron, I'm not your possession. We're not boyfriend and girlfriend, so you don't get to be jealous of him. I thought we were going to be adults about this?"

We got to the end of the field, and I turned around to lean against the fence, fixing my eyes firmly out into the darkness so that I didn't have to look at her.

"I know we're not together, Hermione. Why would I even think that?"

"Because we kiss and have sex?" Hermione settled in front of me, forcing herself into my line of sight with her adorable face. She leaned forward, her hands resting on the wood on either side of my body. She slowly pressed her body against mine in the most delightful way, and I instantly started to get hard—she was so bloody intoxicating. Her lips lingered so close to mine that I could practically taste her, and for a moment, I thought she might kiss me, but instead, the cruel witch pulled away. In the darkness, I could see a smirk playing across her face.

"Yeah, and that's all we do, right?" She nodded, and I felt a wave of sadness travel over me. Although I got into this thing with the hope she'd eventually start to fall for me, I was beginning to realise that it just wasn't going to happen.

"That's all we do!" She pressed a quick kiss to my lips and smiled at me. "I'll be home by 11 tomorrow, and I don't have work until Monday. Do you want to come over?"

"Maybe, we'll see how hungover I am." I tried to paste the smile back on my face. I didn't want to give up on her completely, not when we were just getting started.

"Everyone knows the best cure for a hangover is sex. And I'm a healer, so I'm the expert! Anyway, we should head back to the party. I just wanted to make sure we were still on the same level."

"You go. I'll catch you up."

"Okay, see you in a bit!"

I watched her retreating figure as she disappeared into the darkness and let out a heavy sigh. What sort of mess had I gotten myself into?

⁂

Needless to say, I had a raging hangover the next morning, and unfortunately, I found myself all alone with Dean as we packed up. My hatred for the man had doubled overnight, fuelled by the bottle of Firewhiskey George had unearthed from somewhere. I ended up spilling what was bothering me to him and his twin, Fred, who then proceeded to encourage me to be ridiculously mean about Dean and to Dean for the rest of the night.

So it was awkward this morning. Random images kept flooding back to my brain of what I potentially said to him, although I can't remember being told off by anyone. Surely Harry or Ginny would have stopped me if I got too carried away?

Being the kind of man I am, I knew I had to try and break the ice, and if I could find the one remaining brain cell left in my head, I might even be able to assert myself over him.

Hermione wasn't mine, but there was no way I was going to make it easy for this dickhead to swoop in and steal her from me.

"So your tent, is it a deluxe model?" I turned to Dean, pretending to admire his canvas.

"Yeah, I decided to splash out when Seamus offered me the ticket. Hermione and I were thinking of trying to get a bit of camping in when we finally get some time off work."

"Oh, you were, were you?" Fuck off, Dean.

"Yeah, maybe, it's tough to get a break when you work as hard as we do. We had to do a lot of begging to get this weekend off."

I hated how he was referring to him and Hermione as we like they were already a couple.

"Huh. Yeah, it must be hard being a healer. Just as tough as it is for us Aurors." I tried to sound sympathetic, but all I wanted to do was shout in his face that he was a humongous twat. "So, you're a strong man. You must work out a lot?"

"Yeah. I go to the muggle gym when I can. It's not that far from the hospital. I'm trying to beat my personal best when I lift!"

"Oh, cool. We mostly do cardio since we always have to chase after criminals and dark wizards. It's amazing how many people forget they can apparate when Harry and I are on their tails."

Dean seemed to consider me for a second, and I wondered if I had the wrong end of the stick with him and Hermione. He was very obviously sizing me up. Perhaps he fancied me instead of her? I'd be flattered, but there was only room for one man in my life, and that was Harry.

"You know that I know about you and Hermione, right? That the two of you have this little friends with benefits thing going on?"

"We're what?" I decided to play dumb. It was supposed to be a secret, after all.

"You and Hermione have sex. Pretty regularly, from what I hear."

"Listen, I don't know what she's been saying, but—"

"I get it. She's stunning, and she's got you under her thumb completely. She rings you at all hours, and you're always up for it because why wouldn't you be? I bet she's got a good body, hasn't she? And the two of you fuck for around ten minutes, and then you clean up and leave. Do you think that's got longevity?"

"Longevity?" I'm not an idiot, but I hate it when pompous pricks use big words to try and confuse me. Dean had the ability to be a complete twat, and make me feel like a five-year-old child in one grand swoop. "I don't know what you're talking about, Dean!" I tried to add as much venom to his name as possible.

He scoffed. "Sure, you do. And that's fine, for now. You two can carry on your thing, but pretty soon, Hermione will get bored of you. I work next to her every single day. I use big words and save people's lives. So when she's done having fun with you, she'll look for the next person, and that will be me. And I'm a grown-up. I have my own house, with a mortgage and a real job. I can take care of her in more ways than just with my penis, which is pretty big, you know.

"I'll be the guy who marries her and has a family with her. And we'll have a holiday home in Spain, too. You're just the guy she's fucked a couple of times."

Dean gave me a massive smug look then flicked his wand. His remaining possessions started to pack themselves away as he walked off.

I was seething. He was condescending as fuck. What the hell did Hermione see in him? Plus, I was pissed off that he knew about us when I'd been trying so hard to keep what was going to myself. Only Harry, George and Fred knew.

I had a proper job. And it was important, too. There were so many dark wizards behind bars because of me. And sure, I still lived with Harry, but the arrangement worked well for us. I could easily afford the rent or mortgage on my own place if I wanted to, but I decided not to so that I could continue to save money.

I was utterly miserable now. Dean had managed to spoil the one thing I'd been looking forward to all year. I finished packing my things and pulled my rucksack onto my back before going to find Harry. He was near my parents' tent, flirting with Ginny.

"Hey man, our portkey is due soon." I stared at my feet. I knew I was mumbling, but I didn't care anymore.

"Oh hey Ginny, how are you? You played a great game yesterday. It's a shame you lost, but you did well anyway." My sister scowled at me.

I waved her off dismissively.

"Don't be grumpy with me just because Hermione wouldn't shag you this weekend!"

I gawped at her, my patience with everyone already pretty thin. "She told you?"

"Yeah, and what about it?"

Sensing trouble brewing, Harry decided to get between us, throwing an apologetic look at Ginny. "We do need to go. I don't want to miss our slot." He kissed her on the cheek then followed me up the field. I was fuming. I curled my hands into fists at my sides, desperate to punch someone.

"I can't fucking believe…"

"Well, you told me," Harry offered, immediately regretting it when I threw him a scathing look. "Okay, you're right. I can't believe she told Ginny either!"

Luckily, there was only a short queue for the portkey, and my eyes fell back over Dean, Seamus and Hermione. Harry followed my gaze, his mouth turning quickly into an understanding 'O' as once again, Hermione rested her hand against Dean's bulging bicep.

"I think we should go for a drink. Hair of the dog?"

Hermione's offer of sex ventured into my head, then quickly disappeared. If I went to see her now, she would think she could continue to act this way.

"Yeah, the hair of the dog sounds good!" I nodded and took a deep breath, trying to let my frustrations fall off my shoulders. I would deal with Hermione later.