"You know you don't have to read and finish it in one sitting, right?" Itachi asked Ta for what felt like the thousandth time.
Per Ta's request, they went straight to the bookstore after lunch. Most children would have made a bee-line for the brightly colored children's section or the toy kiosks scattered around the store. Ta, Itachi was quickly learning, was not like most children and was taking detours down random aisles as soon as they arrived. One such detour led them to the reference section wherein he picked up an illustrated dictionary half his size that he refused to part with.
"The children's section is right over there." Itachi prodded gently.
Ta ignored him.
Itachi knelt down to pick up the book. "Why don't I hold it for you while you look around?" He asked though he considered putting it back on the shelf in favor of actual children's books.
Ta slid the book out of reach and continued reading.
Itachi waited a beat before flagging down a nearby clerk to inquire about which books would be appropriate for a child that could read books meant for children twice his age.
"Future architect?" The clerk asked.
Itachi glanced down at Ta who studying a page with a bisected house. "Horizontal pih-vott-ing window." He sounded out, stumbling on the word "pivoting."
"It seems so."
When this continued for another five minutes, Itachi relented and promised to buy him the book. He went on to explain that he wanted to buy Ta several more books to take home but could only do so if Ta looked around and picked out the ones he liked. When Ta accepted this logic, Itachi quickly herded him into the children's section.
"I don't like these books." Ta pouted in a way that was all too familiar to Itachi from when he and Sasuke were kids. When he moved to poke Ta in the forehead and urge him to look again, Ta dodged the appendage and pushed his hand out of the way in annoyance. Sasuke had never learned to do such a thing and if the thought ever crossed his mind he was so accustomed to their game that he just endured it. When he grew older and more irritable Itachi stopped poking him in the forehead.
Itachi pursed his lips together and knelt to Ta's level. "Why don't you like these books?"
"Because they're boring." Ta answered.
"Are you looking at the right ones?" Itachi asked. "Some books are meant for children younger than you and have less words and more pictures. Some books, like chapter books, are meant for children older than you and might be a fun challenge to read." He stood up, taking Ta's hand, and led him to the chapter book aisle. After skimming one of the higher shelves he plucked a book that he thought would suit his nephew's fancy. "What about this one?" He asked. "It's a book about two kids who get teleported to World War II."
What interested a child who could read beyond their level? A fiction chapter book with elements of non-fiction was the perfect solution here.
"Teleportation isn't real." Ta said with slumped shoulders, eyeing the illustrated dictionary. "I don't want to read books that aren't real."
"But the history is real." Itachi said, settling himself onto the floor. "It's written from the point—" too complicated, "perspective—" still too complicated? "from the eyes of a kid so you can imagine what it was really like during that time."
"Then why can't I read a real history book?"
And so Itachi found himself picking Ta up in his arms and carrying him to the history aisle. There, he picked up a thick biography about a famous historical figure, tucked it under his arm, and marched back to the children's section where he found a book about the same historical figure. He sat down in one of the miniature stools with both books and opened them up for Ta to see. "See how the adult history book doesn't have any pictures? The words are smaller and there are going to be several that you don't understand." He explained.
Nonetheless Ta's eyes scanned the page, taking in its contents.
"The children's book will tell you the important information in words you can understand next to a picture of what is going on."
Ta nodded, resigned.
This wasn't going the way Itachi had planned. He didn't want to belittle Ta or diminish his inquisitive nature. Itachi wanted Ta to be able to enjoy books without pestering him every three seconds to ask what phrases like "human frailties" meant. He also had a plan in mind but for it to work he needed Ta to be interested in children's books.
"Do you remember that book Ms. Yakushi gave us?" He asked Ta. "The one you were reading yesterday?"
A nod.
"Children's books aren't just colorful pictures and funny stories." Itachi explained. "Sometimes there are underlying concepts behind them that are meant to be dissected for critical analysis."
Ta blinked at him. "I don't know what any of that means."
Of course he didn't. Itachi was perched in a purple stool the size of his face in a yellow painted room beneath an oak tree mural where kids were whining to their mothers in the background to buy them a game from the toy section and here he was talking about critical analysis with a pre-schooler. He inhaled and exhaled. "Never mind. Do you know what point of view means?"
Ta shook his head.
"Point of view is how a person sees the world around them." He explained. "In the original story of the three little pigs, the wolf is the bad guy. In the story you read yesterday the wolf thinks the pigs are the bad guys. It looks like it's a cute little story about some chubby pigs and a hungry wolf but there is a lot to talk about that wasn't written. Children's books are fun but they can also teach you a lot about people and the world around you. You just have to find the hidden meaning behind the words and pictures."
He said, feeling quite proud of himself at the moment.
Until Ta took his words to heart and started reading through every book he could find in search of hidden meaning.
"Ta," Itachi said, placing a hand on his shoulder to halt his motions, "you don't have to read every book you find. Pick some books that look interesting to you and I will buy them to take home. When we get home you can read them later." He said. Originally, he planned to take Ta to the library but the more he thought about it the more he wanted Ta to have a home full of books and toys that he could call his own. Something permanent that wouldn't be taken away or returned. He was beginning to rethink that choice given their current situation.
In the end, Ta found an assortment of children's books ranging from second grade fiction to historical nonfiction to chapter books. He also found a few children's activity books and a higher level puzzle book if Ta found the simpler ones boring and a puzzle they could put together if he finished the books before they could find time to stop at the library.
When Ta was sufficiently distracted (which didn't take much when books were involved), Itachi set out to lay the foundation of his plan. Since the day he received the phone call from social services granting guardianship of a child he never met before Itachi had been curious about Ta's origins and familial upbringing. Of course, he didn't know any of the details surrounding Ta's family life but couldn't very well ask him either. So Itachi set to work locating books on topics he thought he could talk to Ta about that would elicit some of those details from him without being too obvious. He found books on different types of families and familial relationships as well as children's books about grieving (which were much harder to find). When he returned to their home base, a table in the center of the children's section that was maybe three feet tall, the books were safely tucked away in the depths of the cloth bags one of the clerks had provided him to help carry their haul.
"I assure you," he told Ta when he wandered down the reference aisle again, "all of the illustrated dictionaries look alike."
"But this one has a picture of a pretzel and says 'der teller.'" He said.
The reference section bled into the foreign language section where a German illustrated dictionary caught Ta's eye. Itachi wasn't against the idea, per se. But if he wanted to learn a foreign language they'd need to have a serious conversation about it first. If he let Ta loose now they'd return home with five foreign language books and Itachi was not about to spend the next year learning becoming a polyglot. He could only imagine what breakfast would be like in the mornings. "Je veux du chokoretto gyuunyuu wo por favor." No. Not today. "Let's try to get through these books first," Itachi said, taking Ta by the hand, "and I'll take you to the library in a week or two. Besides, we haven't gone to the toy store yet."
"I don't wanna go to the toy store." Ta complained. He sat down in front of a row of geography and travel books that were practically stacked on the floor and marked 40% off.
"That's fine but we have enough books to last you a month." He pleaded, adjusting the bag of books that was hanging on the crook of his elbow and slowly cutting off his circulation. "Don't you want to see your—" He stopped, wondering how it would be construed to onlookers if they heard him ask if Ta wanted to see his new home. "Don't you want to go home?"
Ta shook his head and yawned.
At last, Itachi understood the stubborn behavior. How many times would he have to remind himself that Ta was a child – a young child – and thus had the needs of one. "Ta, let's go home. I think you're tired." It was edging on three pm and he was amazed that fatigue hadn't taken over sooner. In fact, Itachi could envision himself settling on his sectional with a warm cup of herbal tea before he prepared dinner for them both.
"My name isn't Ta."
Itachi stiffened, stunned into silence. It wasn't so much as an outburst as it was a venomous frustrated hiss.
He hadn't actually explained the nickname to Ta yet. How would Itachi, who shared the same name as his nephew, feel if someone had given him a nickname he didn't like?
Instead of explaining his choice in nicknames he sat the bag of books on the floor and sifted through them until he came across a children's fact book he'd picked out earlier.
"Did you know that if a helicopter stops working it gently propels like the helicopter seeds that fall from trees?"
"Wait, I wanna see." Ta said, getting up and toddling over to where Itachi stood.
Itachi quickly closed the book and dropped it into the bag. Before Ta could protest he scooped him up in his arms and headed for the checkout area. "Later. When we get home." When that earned him a glare, he revised his statement. "Fine. You can have it once I pay for it."
Ta fell asleep on the twelve-minute drive back to the apartment, fact book in hand, just as Itachi hoped he would. An irritable child who couldn't be bothered while reading a book was preferable to one kicking and screaming in a parking lot which he was grateful for. Moreover, he had a nephew. A nephew to take care of that was his responsibility. The thought of being close to family without the drama that usually ensued delighted him to no end but the origins of said nephew still nagged at the back of his mind.
When he reached his apartment he carefully slid the tote full of books onto the floor, careful not to wake the sleeping Ta he held in his arms. He slipped off his shoes and carried the sleeping child to his bedroom where he would be sleeping from now on while Itachi slept on the air mattress in the living room until he could figure out a better solution.
He laid Ta down on the bed, unzipped his coat and carefully removed his arms from inside. He wasn't as hot as Itachi thought he would have been. In fact, his fingers were like ice to Itachi's own numbed finger tips. "I guess he was telling the truth earlier." Itachi smiled fondly. Children, he knew from experience, would say anything if it meant having something in common with an adult they admired. He thought that Ta was just claiming to be cold to mirror Itachi who had kept his coat on for each of their outings today. Apparently Tas was also cold.
After he removed Ta's shoes and tucked him in, he placed the tiny footwear next to his own in the entryway and strode into the kitchen to make himself a cup of herbal tea. As much as he hated to admit it, Ta acted nothing like his father. Ta chose a bookstore whereas Sasuke would have whined and pouted and begged to go to the toy store. Ta was diffident whereas Sasuke was brash. Ta had a sweet tooth whereas Sasuke did not. Ta didn't care for Itachi's forehead poking whereas had endeared it.
Genetics were at play here, that much was for sure but he had hoped he'd see some flicker of Sasuke within Ta. Itachi himself mostly took after their mother but he held some of their father's attributes too. If he looked in the mirror after a long day at work he could see it clearly. The deep lines under his eyes, the piercing gaze, the clenched jaw. When Itachi was irritated, he looked just like Fugaku Uchiha.
Sasuke was the opposite. On the outside, he looked like a masculine version of their mother. And no matter how murderous his glare was, Itachi could picture their mother's face though he'd never seen her that angry before. But on the inside, Sasuke acted more like their father. He was prone to violent outbursts and quickly jumped to conclusions before thinking through what was said. He'd tersely agree to disagree and storm off instead of talking through a solution of the matter at hand.
Sometime within the last four years, Sasuke had gotten together with someone. Someone Ta inherited his mannerisms from. Deep down Itachi pleaded with himself to let it be, to not look into things too closely. But he couldn't help but wonder: what if that someone could shed some light on what happened to his brother? Maybe they'd know what caused Sasuke's life to spiral out of control. Perhaps they could shed some light on what happened the night of Sasuke's death.
In the modern age of social media where everyone was connected, Itachi was confident he'd find a lead through one of the many platforms that existed.
He moved to the dining room table where he kept his laptop and began his search in high spirits which was an absurd notion given that he hadn't made any progress beyond this farfetched idea that he could uncover the truth.
He quickly typed in his Facebook log in information and typed his brother's name into the search bar.
But nothing came up.
Puzzled, he navigated to his friends list – mostly coworkers or college acquaintances and searched for Sasuke's name there.
No results.
Had he unfriended him at some point? But that wouldn't explain why his name didn't appear when he did a general search for it. Had he deleted his account altogether then?
Itachi arched backwards in his chair and put his hands to his face with an exasperated sigh. It was a long shot for sure but he wasn't expecting his plan to fail so quickly. If Sasuke unfriended him and deleted his account it was next to impossible for Itachi to see who Sasuke's friends were. He could recite the names of people Sasuke had been friends up through high school but what were the chances they'd know anything about post-high school Sasuke?
When his neck began to hurt he arched forward slowly, face still in his hands. No matter. He was a criminal defense attorney for God's sake! If he could thwart the prosecution in a court of law he could track down at least one of Sasuke's childhood friends and create a lead! It was his most viable option! Just because Sasuke had left Facebook didn't mean there wasn't a chance that his other friends did as well.
With renewed determination he ran his middle finger along his mouse pad and hovered above the search bar again. He poised his fingers over the keyboard and began to type "U-z-u-m-a-k-i N-a-r-u-t-o" and was pleased when a search result appeared in the drop down.
That was as good a place to start as any.