Prompt: Day 16-Masked

Summary: He knows every one of her masks by heart. And it is wrecking him to see her wear this one.

In which Zuko notices everything about Katara, and it hurts.

AN: I own nothing you recognize from your tv screens.

if you like kataang, this story probably isn't for you! honestly, it doesn't show aang in a very good light either :(

okay if you're a reader who likes to set the mood for the fic, here's what you need to do:

-find the image from the comics of Katara sitting off to the side while Aang entertains his fan club and stare at it for so long you very nearly cry.

-then, if you'd like, you can play these songs in the background as you read - illicit affairs (just for the vibes, this isn't really a cheating fic) and tolerate it - both by taylor swift

enjoy(?)

The Fire Lord steps out of the palace, his daughter clinging to his fingers with one hand and using the other to point at a growing dot in the clear sky.

"Daddy, I see Appa! Right there, see? Do you see him?"

With a smile, Zuko lifts Izumi up and places her on his hip. "Yes, I do see Appa. Are you excited to see your best friends?"

Izumi shakes her head. "I'm excited to see Uncle Aang and Aunt Katara and all their new tricks!" The six-year-old proves her point by throwing her hands into a mimicry of the Avatar's well-renowned spinning marbles trick and then waving her arms wildly, which he guesses is supposed to look like Katara's waterbending.

"Me too," he laughs, "and I don't think we have to wait much longer."

On cue, Appa's six feet make an impact with the ground and Izumi nearly leaps out of his arms to run to it. But as they get closer to the bison, identical frowns settle on both the father and daughter's faces.

There are only three people sitting on Appa's saddle.

Zuko clutches the princess closer to his side so his other hand is free to help Kya and Bumi clamber down. Izumi wriggles out of his hold to join her friends, who are already racing each other to the courtyard. He looks back up at the saddle and does a dramatic bow that he knows will concern his guards.

"My lady."

Katara laughs lightly as she takes his hand and descends from Appa, petting the animal before throwing her arms around Zuko. He reciprocates, clutching her so tightly she might be having difficulty breathing. They remain like that for much longer than usual and that's how he knows that something's off. There's something weighing on her mind and she needs a friend.

And as usual, he will trip over his feet to be that friend.

"What's the matter, Katara?" he whispers into her hair.

She pulls away, shaking her head. "Not right now, Zuko. I can't."

He opens his mouth to press the matter, but when she squeezes her eyes shut he decides against it. He signals to the guards who are trying, poorly, to hide their interest in the interaction that they should take Appa to his usual stable before gently taking a hold of Katara's elbow and leading her to the courtyard.

For twelve years now, he has known exactly when to give her space, when to give her time, and when to make sure her anger isn't about to consume her. So he can recognize that at this moment, she needs to not be alone, but she also shouldn't be pushed to talk. He scours his mind for a safe topic.

"Where's Tenzin? And Aang? You mentioned they were coming with you."

That was the wrong thing to say, he realizes when he sees her jaw clench. The moment passes and she's looking up at him with a bright smile and dull eyes.

"They're at the Eastern Air Temple. Halfway through the trip, Aang said there was something Tenzin just had to see. Even though he's three years old and won't remember it tomorrow. But who am I to argue with him? Obviously, he knows better than I do when it comes to Air Nomad culture. So we dropped them off and continued on our way. Maybe they'll come in a few days, maybe they won't. Airbenders are flighty like that," and Katara forces a chuckle that goes down his ears like poison.

Her arm flexes at the spot where he's still holding it and her feet drag ever so slightly, but to anyone who couldn't read these signs, she would seem like the happiest person on the planet.

However, he can read those signs. He sees the lackluster in her eyes, hears the venom in her voice, and feels the tension in her stance for what they are.

"It's no big deal," she adds softly. Who is she reassuring? Him or herself? And does she really expect him to just drop the matter?

He knows every one of her masks by heart. And it is wrecking him to see her wear this one. The mask that fools everyone into thinking she's happy in her fairytale life, learning new healing techniques every day, and hardly ever leaving the house. If he has any say in the matter (and he does, as her closest friend, a title she has told him no one else can claim), she will not mellow. She will not become a shell of herself. Not while he's alive, and if need be, he would come back from the Spirit World to ensure it.

When their children are in sight, but still distant enough to not hear the conversation he's about to start, he stops in his stride, tugging Katara to a standstill as well. He dismisses the guards behind him with a wave and looks into her inquisitive eyes.

"Katara. I need you to be honest with me. What's wrong?"

She looks down and scuffs her moccasin on the paved pathway. "Nothing's wrong. Why would something be wrong?"

"You've never been a good liar."

"I'm not lying," she insists, crossing her arms, but she still won't meet his eyes. He uses one finger to tip her chin upward and puts upon a disbelieving look.

"You know you can tell me anything, right? I won't judge you."

He can put his finger on the exact moment she clams up - it's visible in the way her chin juts a bit and her shoulders raise the smallest amount.

"Of course I know that. But there's nothing to tell. Maybe you should trust me when I say that."

"It's not a matter of trust," he mutters, but drops his hand from her face and takes ten steps towards Izumi when he realizes Katara is not following. She's still standing a few paces behind him and staring into the distance forlornly.

"Zuko," she whispers, trailing off, and he swears he can hear his heart shatter. It takes all the self-control Uncle has built into him over the years to not gather her in his embrace; instead, he slowly makes his way back to her and puts a hand on her shoulder.

"Katara."

A guttural noise escapes the waterbender and she throws herself into his chest, sending him staggering back a few steps until he can wrap his arms around her. He runs his hand over her hair repeatedly as he feels his tunic get wetter and wetter with every second.

There is a familiar rage twisting its way through every part of his body. Forget just the person that could make her feel like this - and he has an awful, awful idea of who that is - he wants to tear the whole world apart. The whole world deserves to be punished for sitting by silently as Katara goes through shadowed motions of life like she doesn't even exist. They all deserve to suffer if they can let Katara suppress so much hurt that it has to boil over in an emotional breakdown when she has done nothing but give and give and give, never expecting nor receiving anything in return. He presses his chin and hushed words of affection into her hair.

"It's alright. Let it all out. It's okay. I'm here, Katara. We'll get through this." Her sobs grow louder and her shaking becomes even stronger.

When was the last time she got to cry? Or release her emotions at all? Has Aang ever stood with her like this, murmuring reassurances and promises that he will actually keep? Has he ever been there for her through her most pained, heartrending moments, as Zuko has twice - once so many years ago after confronting a pathetic, old murderer and the second instance being the present - to remind her that she is not alone? He knows how tiring it can get to be a single parent, and Katara shouldn't be going through that, not when her husband is healthy and alive and perfectly capable of helping her. It's too late in life for Aang to keep acting as though he is a child, a runaway. It's been too late for so long. Katara deserves an equal at her side, but he thinks it might be too late for that as well.

"Zuko," she whispers again, clutching at his robe, "why- why can't he-"

She cuts herself off and he can feel her shudder in his arms.

"There's no rush. Take your time." Yes, of course, he says that because Katara needs time to form her sentences, but also because if he hears a single troublesome word about Aang in the next few seconds, he may just follow in Sozin's footsteps.

"Sokka and Suki live on separate continents for half the year," she chokes out, "but I have never seen a couple more connected, except for my parents. Yet, on the nights when Aang lies next to me...I have never felt so distant from someone I care about."

He doesn't stop running his hand up and down her back, even as his stomach folds in on itself at the thought of how lonely she must be.

"And I'm so tired. So, so tired. It's like I started being his caretaker when I was fourteen and I never stopped. When will it stop? When do I finally get to be married to an adult?"

"I'm sorry," he whispers, because he feels somewhat responsible for not seeing the signs earlier, but it goes unheard.

"And- and if not for me, then he needs to be there for our children! When Bumi was born, he was Aang's whole world. You could see in his eyes how much he loved his son. But as far as we could tell, he wasn't a bender. Not a waterbender and not an airbender. And that was fine with me. I was over the moon about the fact that I had a child. But Aang, despite his love, would tickle Bumi often just to get him to sneeze, and every time he sneezed normally, instead of flying across the room or whatever Aang wanted from him, there would be this disappointed look on his face.

"And then Kya was born and he did the same thing all over again. You should have seen his face when Kya bent water for the first time. I had just found out that I wasn't the last waterbender from the Southern Water Tribe and he looked like I had stolen something from him! Why?" she asks, pushing at his chest, and taking a few steps away from him. His hands drop limply as her pain chills the air around them. "The Avatar is supposed to care about everyone - non-benders and waterbenders and airbenders alike, so why can't he even do that for his own children? It's not fair, Zuko, it's not right!"

"No, it's not." It feels like sacrilege to say that about his friend, the world's savior, but how can he stay silent? How can he pretend that Aang's actions are negligible or excusable? How can he, when he has been a first-hand recipient of neglect from a parent, someone who is supposed to love you unconditionally, for his bending no less? "Have you talked to anyone else about this?"

His forehead wrinkles when she shakes her head.

"No. I didn't want to burden Dad or Sokka or Suki or Toph or...you. I'm sorry for dumping all of-"

"Stop, Katara." He steps toward her to cradle her face and she nestles into the touch. "You're not dumping this on me. I asked you to tell me. And you wouldn't be burdening anyone. We all care about you and we want to know if something's wrong."

"I don't want people to think they have to choose sides. Or that I'm an ungrateful wife."

"There are no sides in a matter like this. He is wrong. It's not ungrateful to ask for your husband to be there for kids that are partly his. Or to be there for you. That's his job and he knew that when he got married to you. Yes, being the Avatar and the last airbender are also titles he has to carry, and it's unfortunate, but that doesn't excuse him from being a father or spouse. And if he couldn't handle that, he shouldn't have asked you to marry him."

He can feel her eyes widen against his palm and he thinks he may have gone too far this time, but the shock disappears from her face just as quickly as it came, and she's back to wearing that deplorable look of resignation.

"Do you- do you think I enable him? Maybe it's my fault for not cracking down hard and forcing him to take Kya and Bumi on all his trips. If they grow up and hate their father...will they hate me too, for letting him do that to them?"

Zuko is silent as he removes his hand from her face and steps back. He looks up at the clouds and hopes the wind will carry his curses to Aang.

"Katara," he starts, as forcefully as he can, "if you take nothing else away from this meeting, remember this. It is not your fault. You are not his parent for his behavior to be your responsibility. However, you should talk to him. Tell him how you feel. Don't let this go unsaid. And if you need to, write to me. I'll be there and I'll be on your side as you talk to him. As for Kya and Bumi hating you…" he trails off and looks over at the three children playing tag, shrieking as a flame, splash of water, and boomerang collide midair. "Some days, I really hate my mother for leaving me behind. For letting Ozai do this to me. For letting Ozai hurt Azula the way he did. Even though I know she did it for me, it still stings, you know? And it's not fair to her, but the way I felt when I was eleven, abandoned and unwanted, that's hard to let go of.

"So I'll be honest with you. If you don't want them to resent you, you have to do something. You have to say something. And quite frankly, I don't know why you haven't for so long. It's unlike you to not speak your mind. You need to find that spark again, for your children and for yourself. Even for Tenzin, because even though it seems like he's getting the better end of the stick, he's going to grow up distant from his siblings and with the burden of continuing an entire culture on his shoulders. No one wins unless you take a stand."

He looks back at the waterbender to see even more tears running down her face.

"Katara! I didn't say it to hurt you, I just-"

Before he can finish, she's rushing at him for the second time today, throwing her arms around him, and gasping into his chest.

"Thank you, Zuko. I- I needed to hear that. You're right. I'm better than this. I'm stronger than this. Thank you."

He pulls her face away from his center and lightly pecks her forehead. A traitorous, awful thought makes itself known in the back of his head - if you had married me, Katara... - and he nearly chokes on air before pushing it away.

"Of course, Katara. Anytime." Anything, for you. She smiles up at him and he makes a dangerous decision, for her sake. "And you know what? I want you to be there at the next peace summit. Your dad was going to send Sokka, right? Let him and Suki stay at home with their baby. You should come instead."

She pulls away and tilts her head in apparent confusion. "What would I do there?"

"What would you not do? You're useful in whatever room you step in. You could talk about the Southern Water Tribe's progress, or the school you want to start for waterbenders, or the memorial for Yue you mentioned you wanted to build in your last letter. Maybe you could act as a mediator between Earth Kingdom delegates since they all talk about you fondly. You could even be my advisor and help me not set things on fire. You could do it all, honestly," he says with a smile that hides his desperation at wanting to see her again soon, and really see her, not just this hollowed-out Katara he's scared of her turning into.

"I'm not sure-"

"Katara. Please. Promise me you'll be there. You can be doing so much more and it is a damn shame that you're always at home when we both know that's never what you wanted."

She covers her eyes with one hand and peeks through her fingers a second later. "You remember all the things I want to do?"

He grins and pushes her shoulder playfully. "Obviously. What do you think I do with your letters? I frame them in the main hallway so I can read them again and again until I memorize them."

It gets her to laugh, and he's thankful that she didn't see through his bad jest right to the core of who he is because then she might be able to tell that he really does have every single one of her letters memorized.

"Okay, okay. I'll be there."

He feels sixteen again and oh-so-giddy at those words that he captures her in a one-armed embrace.

"Good. I'm glad to hear it. Would the three of you like to come in now? We've prepared Southern Water Tribe food for dinner and I've been teaching Izumi how to swallow down seaprunes without looking revolted."

Katara laughs again, sending a thrill through him, but it fades when he feels her hunch a little.

"Is it okay if I leave Kya and Bumi here with you, actually? I have to- I don't want to put off any more time. I need to talk to him right away, and I don't want them to see us fighting. In case it turns into a fight. Or in case he says something he doesn't mean."

He takes a step forward to turn around and face her. "Of course. As I said, I'm here for you. For anything you need. Just say the word, alright? Now go. Do what you need to. Stay safe."

She reaches up to hug him around the neck.

"Thank you for everything, Zuko."

He clasps her tightly, trying to put all his love into the gesture. When she takes a step back, she reaches up to wipe something on his face, and that's when he realizes he's crying and trembling a little.

"I'll be okay. Don't worry. Everything will work out as it should."

From the way his voice box refuses to work, it seems as though he's spent all his words for the day, so he does nothing but nod. She shoots him one last blinding smile, and he knows this one is no facade, before spinning around and sprinting towards the entry.

"Get the bison!" he shouts to the guards, and the moment Appa is brought back out into the open, Katara jumps onto his back gracefully.

As Appa takes off into the sky, Katara turns around to wave at him and he waves back wildly. He already knows that the picture of her, backlit by the setting sun, is just one more that will be imprinted into his mind eternally.

AN: *cries in a corner* idek why this one-shot made me so emotional but it did. and I am so very tempted to continue this...

anyway, your thoughts in the comment box or on tumblr (thebluesunflower44) are always cherished! :)

see you later today for day 18's story!