CHAPTER EIGHT :Tobias- last day with his mother.
Tris didn't reply about her test results. However, I don't think that it's important to say because we are Abnegations and we have learned since our childhood about how to be kind and helpful. We reached the central statue, there was a lot of crowd. It pluzzed me, because today isn't any festival for which people have gathered around.
Tris pulled my hand and said in excitement, "Wow, is there some celebration for which people have gathered. Hurry up, let's get there before it's late."
We dashed in there. However, the closer we came, the more uncomfortable I felt. That's because people were busy in their silent talks and no one had a smile on their face. I reached my building gate and saw it! It's heartbreaking, it's painful, it's devastating. I fell down on my knees and so did Tris along with me. I was completely startled, I was frozen in time. It felt like my heart had stopped beating. My mom was lying down there, her eyes were closed and this is the first time when she didn't talk to me even after being there. Tris held my hand and kept rushing her hands over my head and hair. In some time Tris's Uncle and my other family members gave me the hand. For some time I just lost my voice. I wasn't able to talk or ask anything. Everyone gathered around to help out and carry out my mom's funeral. I heard telling the doctor that she was doing good, but then there were sudden changes in her body which she didn't inform doctors about. No one knew why but doctors said that it was better because she was already handling a lot from the past 2 years.
Tris said, calming me down, "Tobias, we have to go in the forest, in the East. I am sorry for what happened."
I was not ready to go, to let her go. It ripped me up thinking about what has happened. This illogical, dangerous thinking makes me shudder. There's regret and a guilt that you weren't there with her for the last time. All the lovely memories of talking in her hospital bed and learning from her as a teacher floods through my mind. Then, after one minute you realize that none of this will be there, anymore.
I couldn't see her in that wooden coffin. I wanted her to get up and talk to me. Hug me tightly but it's not going to happen and it tears me down. Everyone prayed for her to stay happy wherever she goes. While giving her the flower and seeing her for the last time, brings anger into my heart. Why didn't she tell me what she felt? Why didn't she tell me anything?