A/N:

Fran, Lauren, Erin and April - thank you for all of your help ❤️

x

8

Connection

o-O-o

"Back again, Danny?" Bella asked playfully as she approached the older man. He gave her a grin.

"That I am, Doll; your lucky day 'ain't it?"

"It certainly is," Bella said warmly, lifting his chart and checking what the previous medications and notes were saying about him. She'd just started her shift ten minutes ago and was making her rounds.

"Visiting hours soon," Danny noted, his brown eyes sparkling. "My Pattie will be along shortly."

Bella grinned, glancing at her watch and nodding. "Just four more hours till eleven, Danny."

He chuckled, but Bella frowned, distracted by his notes. "You think something is wrong with your valve?"

"Just a bit of chest pain, Doll, I'll be jus' fine, don't you worry," Danny said calmly.

Bella forced her face to remain neutral - a skill that is drilled into you from day one when you work in medicine. "Of course you will, Danny. I've got to move on to the next patient, but I'll be back in half an hour; you need anything, just press the-"

"-big red button, Doll, I know." Danny saluted her.

Bella stepped up and squeezed his large, wrinkled hand, the warmth flooding her palm. "You get some sleep. You want to look even more handsome for Pattie when she arrives, don't you?"

"I do." Danny grinned at her, squeezing back.

Bella made her way out of the room, pressing her hand to her head once she was out of view. The chest pain wasn't a good sign, especially so soon after having the new valve. She wandered up to the desk and smiled when she saw Dr. Bloom standing there, talking to Nancy.

"Hi, Dr. Bloom," she greeted the attractive, brunette woman.

Sparkling gray eyes met hers, "Hi Bella, how are you today?"

"I'm good," Bella said automatically, the way you're programmed to do from a young age whenever anyone asks you such a question. After all, the only acceptable answer is good, or great, or even fine. "How are you?"

"I'm great." Dr. Bloom smiled. Bella smiled back.

"I just saw Danny Demarco's chart; what do you think is going on?" Bella asked, unable to keep the worry out of her voice.

Dr. Bloom smiled gently, "Don't worry, Bella, I'm literally looking at his stats right now, and everything looks good. Just a false alarm, his valve is completely fine, look."

Bella felt warmth spread in her chest as the older doctor handed her the tablet, showing her the MRI scan. Even though many doctors respected their nurses, there was often a sense of superiority among them: doctors were smarter, they understood things nurses couldn't, nurses were people who couldn't be doctors, so chose nursing instead.

Bella had come top of her class and easily could have pursued medicine. But she wanted to be a nurse, to help people and spend time with patients. She wasn't interested in surgery so much as being there to help patients through it.

Dr. Bloom handing her the tablet and expecting her to understand was a lovely gesture, the nicest one Bella had seen since she started working at Northwestern.

Her eyes scanned the screen. It was a video, and she could see the heart contracting, blood moving through the valves in perfect synchronicity.

"Blood work was fine, ECG clear, BP is perfect, though you would have just seen that. He's fine," said Dr. Bloom warmly.

"Thank god," Bella breathed out, handing back the tablet. She smiled warmly at Dr. Bloom. "Thank you."

The brunette winked. "See you later."

Bella smiled after her. "She's so nice," she commented to Nancy.

"Yeah, she's a sweet one." Nancy grinned. "Now get back to rounds, slacker." Her voice was light and teasing, and Bella laughed as she walked off.

Bella finished up her rounds and then met Annabelle for coffee, stepping outside into the fresh air with her. The back of her neck grew warm, the pavement glinting, making her squint. Trees across from them swayed gently in the breeze, the air thick with traffic noises and sirens. Bella's coffee cup was warm and comforting against her palm, the bitter taste a familiar and delicious wake-up call.

"How's your day?" Annabelle asked, retying her long hair up into a sleek ponytail.

Bella shrugged. "Fine, and…haven't seen Edward yet, which always helps."

Annabelle gave her a knowing look, seeing straight through Bella's crap, but to Bella's relief, she didn't comment on it.

Seeing Edward would always be the best and worst part of Bella's day. The worst, because she hated him, because the sight of him made her chest ache, especially when their eyes met, and she had to look into those sea-green orbs and see emotion inside that made something under her ribs twist and tighten.

And for all the reasons it was the worst part of her day; it was also the best. Because even now, after everything, he made her heart beat faster in her chest and sent tingles down her spine. He was so beautiful it hurt. His angular jaw was constantly covered in black stubble as of late, inspiring thoughts of how it would feel against her cheeks, between her legs.

Those feelings were hastily pushed away when they came, but she couldn't deny their existence, couldn't deny that for every part of her that despised him, there was another, equal part that loved him and wanted him desperately.

Four more days, then he'd be on a different ward, and she'd only have to see him occasionally, maybe in the cafeteria or a hallway.

They finished their coffees, and Bella went up to start doing the morning medications. They tried to deliver the pain doses just before visiting hours started so patients could feel a bit better when they were with their families.

Bella had just finished when the first visitors started walking through, and she stopped at the desk, going through her notes from the morning and filling in the parts she'd abbreviated. All of a sudden, her body tensed, goosebumps rising down her bare arms. Edward was standing next to her, she could feel it, but she forced her gaze down, didn't allow herself to look up at him. He wouldn't try to talk to her anyway; he'd avoided her like the plague since she spat those words at him; kept his distance just like she'd wanted him to.

She'd wanted him to stay away, but she hated that he was listening to her, hated that he found it so easy to just leave her alone. It just proved to her even more that Edward didn't love her, that she was a plaything to him because if he genuinely loved her, wouldn't he be begging her every day for her forgiveness, wouldn't he grovel, try desperately to get her to speak to him?

He was at the desk, grabbing an iPad, and her skin went haywire as she inhaled his spicy cologne, every single part of her narrowing, fixing, yearning, on the man beside her. Her eyes stayed on her notes, even as her breathing picked up, her breasts feeling heavy. Edward was close enough to touch if she outstretched her fingers. She knew it, without even having to look, because her body screamed at her to move towards him, something like echolocation bouncing off her and finding him there—that insane awareness that had driven her crazy as a teenager—that still drove her crazy now.

Then he moved, walked away, and she let out a sigh of relief. She hated him. She hated him more than she'd hated anyone. Not just because of what he'd done to her, but because of what his presence did to her. But because her traitorous body and heart belonged to that infuriating, gorgeous, and manipulative man.

Because she didn't hate him at all…

Bella stopped in on Danny near the end of visiting hours, hoping to see Pattie, but to her surprise, he was alone in his room.

She frowned at him."Where's Pattie, Danny?"

His warm brown eyes were full of concern as they met hers, and he lifted his phone in his hand. "I don't know, she didn't come, she always comes, and she's not answering her phone."

Bella's heart started racing, "Don't worry, Danny, I'm sure she just got caught up with something."

Danny shook his head, eyes wide, "She would have called; she always calls, see? Bella, Doll, I need someone to go check on her; I don't know why she hasn't called."

Bella grabbed his hand and smiled, her voice soft and soothing, "I'm going to go sort it out right now, Danny, you just relax for me, okay hon? You know Pattie will be furious if she finds out you were stressing; it's not good for you." She squeezed, and he nodded warily.

She walked quickly to the desk, but just as she was about to dial a number for an emergency call out, Nancy came up to her, her face ashen.

"What happened?" Bella asked, ice flooding her veins. "Did we lose a patient?"

"We had a woman pass away in the waiting room, she was here for visiting hours, but half an hour early, so they told her to go and sit down. Everyone thought she was just sleeping, she was leaning up against the wall, but then she didn't move when visiting hours started, so Anton went to check on her and…"

"That's really sad," Bella said, her heart aching. "Who was she going to visit?'

Nancy reached out and grabbed her hand, "Bella, honey, it was Patti Demarco."

Bella recoiled, her eyes widening, "No! Oh god, Danny…"

"We thought you should be the one to tell him; he really likes you," Nancy said gently.

Tears sprung from Bella's eyes without her permission. She was better than this, she'd lost patients before, and Pattie Demarco wasn't even her patient. She should be able to hold herself together, but the tears kept coming anyway. She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. Nancy was right, she was closest to Danny, and she should be the one to tell him, she could do this, she would do this, for him.

"Okay, I'll…just give me a second," Bella said, wiping at her eyes and drinking some water.

Nancy gave her a sad smile. "Sure, hon."

The walk to Danny Demarco's room felt like dragging her feet through mud, each step a fight to push on, something pulling her backward.

She walked right up to his bed and held his hand in hers, looking into his brown eyes. "Danny."

He looked up at her with a tentative smile, "Is she coming? Is she okay?"

"Danny," Bella repeated, squeezing his hand, "Pattie was here, waiting to see you. She was so excited she got here really early."

Danny smiled and then frowned, "But…why isn't she…"

Bella's chest ached, "I'm so sorry, Danny, but Pattie passed away in the waiting room. She's..." Bella knew she had to say the words, "-dead."

Danny's quiet gasp was more heart-wrenching than if he'd screamed or yelled, the pain held in that tiny noise soul-shattering like his heart and lungs had been ripped from him, leaving him without air.

"No," he muttered. "No, she can't…she can't be."

Bella wasn't supposed to let patients see her cry, but a tear made its way down her cheek anyway, her throat closing. "I'm so sorry," she murmured.

Danny shook his head rapidly, his face leeching of color, a tremor going through his body. "I can't…this isn't…she can't…oh…." A broken sob came from him, one that tore Bella to pieces and flayed her heart. He clutched at her hand tightly, tears streaming down his cheeks, those warm brown eyes flooding with agony. "Oh…"

Bella tried to keep herself from crying, and she opened her mouth to try to comfort him further when suddenly Danny's monitor started going haywire. Bella's head snapped to it in alarm, and Danny wrenched his hand from hers, placing it on his chest and letting out rasping gasps.

"No!" Bella cried, "Danny, no, don't you dare, don't you dare."

Danny arched back into the bed, his body stiffening as his eyes rolled back into his head.

She slammed the button above his head, the tannoy blaring. Code Blue. Code Blue in room 512.

Bella dropped the bed flat and started compressions. "Stay. With. Me," she begged, "Danny, please. Don't you give up!"

The RS team rushed into the room with the crash cart, and one of them picked up his chart. "Everyone, stop! He's DNR."

Bella ignored him, her arms burning as she pumped her hands over Danny's heart.

"Swan, step back from the patient."

"No!" Bella was openly crying, hot tears burning her eyes. "Danny, please don't do this, please don't do this."

"Get her out of here!"

Fingers pulled at her wrists, trying to pull her backward, but Bella ripped out of them, continuing compressions. "Let me help him. I can help him. Come on, Danny!"

"Swan!"

"Give me the paddles," Bella snapped.

"Swan, let him go!"

Warm, familiar hands suddenly covered hers, a low voice in her ear. "Bella, baby, let go; it's okay."

"No!" Bella sobbed, "He'll die."

Edward sighed in her ear, his breath warm. "He's already gone, baby, you have to let go, come on, you have to stop."

Bella's hands were shaking violently, but she let Edward pull her hands off the patient, stepping back as a long, drawn-out noise came from the monitor.

"Time of death, 14:22," the doctor muttered.

Bella stared at Danny's still body, his glassy brown eyes staring up at the ceiling. No glitter anymore. No sparkle.

Bella looked away from him and found everyone staring at her. Some held sympathetic expressions, others contempt or irritation.

She turned and walked out of the room swiftly, fighting the urge to run; her vision blurred from the hot tears running down her cheeks. Bella went into the first door she found, an empty patient room and slumped against the wall, her body shaking.

He was gone.

"Bella," a deep voice said in front of her. She opened her eyes and met vibrant sea green. "I'll go get Annabelle, just wait here, okay?" he murmured.

Her chest ached, her heart a broken mess in her chest. He'd died. He'd just died. Losing his Pattie had killed him. Anguish tore through her, catching in her throat, wrapping its way around her ribs and constricting her.

A soft cry fell from Bella's mouth, and Edward's expression became anguished. "Bella…" he said gently.

She couldn't help herself; she stepped forwards and buried her face into his chest, sobbing. Edward's arms wrapped around her tightly, so warm and familiar and right. He pressed his warm stubbled cheek to her head, rubbing his large hand up her back.

"Oh baby," he murmured as she shook in his arms, kissing her forehead, his other hand stroking her hair.

"H-he just died," she cried. "That's how m-much she meant to h-him."

Edward didn't say anything, just kissed her head again, his body hard and warm against hers, completely encircling her, shielding her from anything but him. She didn't know how long she stayed there, sobbing brokenly into him, but when she finally stopped, his shirt was wet against her cheek.

She pulled back, and he looked at her, his enchanting green eyes full of concern and sadness and something else, something that wrenched at her broken heartstrings. His burning hand gently cupped her cheek, thumb smoothing softly under her eye.

"Are you okay?"

Emotions flooded through her so intensely it made her knees weak. Hurt, pain, anguish.

Love.

So much love for the man in front of her that it made her feel hollow. It was like she was missing the key piece of the puzzle. He would never feel like that for her, never love her the way she loved him, and knowing that was the most excruciating pain she'd ever felt in her life.

She pushed him off her and left the room.

Poor Danny :(

See you next week lovelies! Thank you so much for all the love - you're amazing.

Few quick updates while I have your attention:

The Wicked Games chapter is posting tomorrow (and then Monday as usual)

If you've been waiting to read Resisiting Miss Swan until it was complete - the final chapter posts Saturday ;)

All teasers for chapters before they post, images for chapters and post-chapter convos can be found in the Creeatingmadness FB Group - hope to see you there ❤️