Emily had sat quietly the whole flight to the compound, BIlly on the other hand, he had loved the whole ride, he had sat at the front on Steve's knee. Emily had so many feelings going round in her head. She couldn't stop thinking about Bucky. As the jet landed and they started heading to the compound, Billy had run off in front to walk with Nat, Emily hesitated at the entrance, the last time she was here, she had been under arrest, this time she entered free, but she also entered without Bucky, again. Steve stopped next to her, he put his hand round her shoulder.

"You ok?"

"Everytime i come to this place….it's because I've lost him in one way or another and this time it might be for good."

Steve pulls her closer to him as they head inside, Billy ran to her and she scooped him up and carried on her hip. They all just stood in the kitchen, no one really knew what to do. Emily looked at them all, her motherly instinct took over.

"I'm gonna cook us some dinner." she said after a moment. "let's all get a room, shower and meet back here in about an hour."

Everyone looked at her, she walked with Billy back to the room she had stayed in. It was very much the same. She started unpacking the bags she had brought with her and placed some of Billy's toys on the bed, he came over and started playing with a small truck. She was putting the clothes in the draws when Steve came in. Freshly showered.

"I thought he might need watching while you have a shower."

"Thank you." Emily picked up a towel and some clothes and headed to the bathroom. She stood under the water, tears started to stream down her cheeks, she hadn't cried since this terrible thing started. She wanted to be strong for Billy, he was their whole world. They were going to get Bucky back, they were going to get all of them back. She had to believe they could get them back.

Emily finished off in the shower and stepped out grabbing a towel on the way. She heard Steve and Billy talking as she opened the bathroom door.

"Mama said Dada has gone away."

She realised this was half a statement, half question to Steve. She peered round the door after pulling on the last of her clothes, Steve was sitting on the floor with him, Billy was still playing with the truck.

"Yer bud, but he's coming back."

"When?"

Such a simple question, a child's question, that no adult had the answer too. Steve pulled him into his lap. "Really soon."

Steve turned then as Emily opened the door a little more, she gave him a small smile. They headed down to the kitchen, there wasn't much food in, but there was enough to make some pasta. As everyone gathered, Emily placed the large pan on the chopping board on the side placing several small bowls for everyone to dish their own food up. She smiled when she saw Billy stood next to Steve, he had his own bowl in his hand, Steve put him some pasta in the bowl and he ran with it to sit next to Nat. Emily got her own small bowl and went to sit with everyone. They ate quietly and sat letting what had happened sink in. As the evening wore on, Emily turned and saw that BIlly had fallen asleep next to Nat. She scooped him up and took him to her bed, she laid him down and covered him up, kissing his head.

The following weeks were filled with trying to figure out, who was still here and who had gone. There was a rumbling outside the front entrance of the compound one evening, it had sounded like large engines powering down and sure enough looking out from the balcony on the second floor they saw a jet coming into land. As the doors opened, Emily was shocked to see Tony, Steve helped him in, Pepper was overjoyed to have him back. He was weak and Emily made him a bowl of soup, while Bruce hooked him up to a drip. Tony was angry, far more angry than she had ever seen him before. He had always had a temper but most of this seemed to be aimed at Steve. As Stark's body finally gave in Emily rushed forward to catch him as he collapsed from the one sided shouting match, they settled him into one of the hospital beds, Bruce hooked him back up to the drip and left Pepper to sit with him.

In the living room, everyone was chatting to the new girl. Emily liked her. The discussion turned to the stones.

"Are you saying we could reverse it. That we can bring them back?" Emily asked as she looked round the room. No one really answered her question, all they seemed to know was this was their best chance. She watched them all start suiting up, Steve came over to her.

"You sure you don't wanna come with us?"

"I'm not sure what i want to do right now. But I know I can't leave Billy alone."

Steve knew what she meant, the worry of this going wrong. He gave her a hug and left. Emily took Pepper a tea, Tony was still out.

"Thank you." Pepper whispered sadly, barely taking her eyes off of Tony.

"Your welcome, he'll be ok."

"I'm sorry about Bucky." Emily went quiet, the way Pepper said it was like he had actually died.

Pepper squeezed her hand. "I didn't mean it like that. Tony said you have a son. Did he…."

"He's here, he just wants to know where his dad is. It's just not a question I can answer." Emily sat across from Pepper and looked at Tony.

"They will find a way to bring him back."

Emily gave Pepper a small smile. Everyone was sorry, everyone was mourning some sort of loss right now, but her only concern was Billy. She left Pepper once their mugs were empty and headed off to her room. When she entered she spotted Billy asleep on the bed, he was hugging the white wolf teddy T'Challa had gifted him on the day he was born. Emily sat in the chair by the window, she already knew she wouldn't sleep. She pulled one of her old books down off the shelf, she was only half reading it, she kept looking out of the window, then over at Billy.

Two or three hours passed before Emily saw the ship coming back into land. Running down to meet them all she saw Steve walking down the ramp and just by the look on his face she knew it was bad news. Nat came over to her as Steve headed straight passed.

"You didn't find him?"

Nat took hold of her hands and squeezed them."We found him, but he had…. Well he had already destroyed the stones."

Emily fell to the floor, she couldn't breath. She couldn't remember what happened next, she remembered the ground shaking, then darkness, she knew someone had carried her inside. When she woke up on the bed next to Billy, she saw Steve was sitting in her chair.

He looked at her with eyes that spoke of so much loss and pain that she felt like crying. "I'm so sorry."

Emily didn't know what to say to him, to any of them. She just wanted to wake up from this nightmare. Billy started to stare, she jumped up and started to wipe the tears from her eyes. Billy turned and she smiled at him, he then jumped on Steve.

"Uncle Steve, dada home?"

Emily looked away then, she could hear Steve talking to Billy, but she couldn't take it all in. How the hell was she gonna raise Billy on her own, how was she going to live in a world without Bucky. She went to the bathroom and threw up, it was all too much. She had put everything into believing that they could bring them back. She cleaned herself up and headed back into the bedroom, Steve was helping BIlly get dressed.

"Mama, uncle Steve is taking me out for breakfast."

"That's nice baby. You be a good boy." He ran over to her and she scooped him up. He put his tiny hand on her cheek, she looked into his little face, he had Bucky's eyes, his hair, his whole face was just a smaller version of the man she loved.

"Are we going home?"

Emily sighed, another question, she knew the answer for this one though. "No, we're going to stay here with Uncle Steve and Aunty Nat for a bit. How about we sort you your own room out. Maybe between mine and Uncle Steve's that way you can be near us both."

"Ok, lots of toys?"

"As many toys as you want." Emily kissed his cheek. Steve took him off her and they left.

An hour later she was in the kitchen, working out what food and supplies they were going to need. The list was getting longer by the second. She heard someone sit on one of the stools, she turned and Tony was sitting in front of her.

"You look horrid."

Tony laughed at her. "Thanks. I saw Steve leave with a kid. Spitting image of his dad."

"William, we call him Billy."

Tony notices the look on her face, she had lost the love of her life. "If you ever, either of you ever need anything, you just have to ask."

Emily reached forward and took his hand. "Thank you. The only thing we both need, is something you can't give us."

Emily turned away a moment and went looking into the fridge where she found some soup, she warmed it up for Tony. "Eat that. I'm heading to the market to pick up some food and supplies."

"Thank you. Pepper and I are leaving today."

Emily walked round and hugged him. Her and Tony may not see eye to eye on everything but she respected the man. "I'll miss you."

"You too. I hope you bring that little one to visit me." Emily kisses his cheek and leaves.

…

Tony and Pepper are loading the car up, when Steve comes back with Billy. Billy is sitting on his shoulders. Tony looks up at the little boy.

"Hey kiddo. You have fun with your uncle?"

Billy pulls on Steve's hair, he didn't know the man stood in front of him.

"It's ok Billy. He knows your mum."

"That's right, me and your mum go way back."

The little boy looked at him. "You know dada?"

Tony looked at Steve and back at Billy. "I do. You look just like him."

Billy smiled, he knew he looked like his dad, everyone told him that.

"You look after your mum ok?

"I promise."

Steve takes him off his shoulders. "Go inside little man, Aunty Nat will wanna see you." Billy runs off towards the compound, Steve turns to Tony.

"I've left something for Emily in her room. It's for her and that little one." Steve looks at him, surprised and confused. "I know we're never gonna agree on everything but that little man has done nothing wrong. Least i can do is make sure he and his mother are looked after."

Steve nods and helps Pepper with the last of the things before waving them off.

….

When Emily arrives home, Billy is watching TV in the living room, Nat and Steve are watching him from the kitchen. Emily places some bags on the side. "There's more in the car."

Steve went to get them. When he came back he turned to Emily. "Tony says he left you something in your room."

Emily headed to her room, inside she found a note on the bed.

"Emily,

I know you and me have had our differences. After everything, I want to tell you I'm sorry you have lost Bucky. I'm also sorry for the time we took away from you.

There is a cheque here, bank and use it to give you and your son a life. Raise that little boy to be better than any of us. Don't let him repeat our mistakes.

I'm here if you need me.

All my love

Tony"

Emily looked down at the cheque, it was a huge amount of money. More than she thought they would ever need, but was thankful for it.

A month and a half later Emily was sitting on her bed, she heard someone open the door. "Hey you ok? Steve has taken Billy outside for a bit."

"Thanks Nat."

It was then Nat noticed the test in her hand. "Is that…"

"A pregnancy test. Yep! We talked about this, the night before….. Bucky wanted to be a dad again."

"And you?" Nat sat next to her with her hand on her back.

"I wanted more kids with him. Give them and us the family neither of us have."

Nat noticed the look on her face, she was scared about this. Nat took hold of her hand and turned to face her a little better.

"I don't know if i can do this alone. I can't be a mother to two kids, without him."

Nat squeezed her hand then, Emily looked at her. "Did i ever tell you i can't have kids. They…. Well I had that choice taken away from me."

"Nat, I'm sorry."

"We will never stop trying to bring them back, i will never stop trying to bring him back to you. Remember that, you, Billy and whoever is in here, will see him again." Emily had tears in her eyes. "Plus as long as you're here with me, you are never alone."

Emily hugged Nat then, she was right, Bucky may not be here, but she wasn't alone. She had Nat and Steve and Tony if she needed him.

"I suppose we best get a nursery put together then."

Emily let out a little laugh.

…...end of chapter 8