Okay, I know I have a lot of explanations to make right now. First of all, I'd like to thank those of you who decided to stop reading this story and said their farewells. Even though I know you, guys, won't read it, I still thank you mostly for being polite in your reviews. I'm glad you were with me for some time, and it saddens me to know that you won't be anymore, but I understand and respect your decision. I guess I was too quick to thank for 300 favorites XD.

Now, I know that what I did in the previous chapter was risky, and I was aware that some of you would stop reading my story at this point, but it was a risk I had to take. Let's start with stating the obvious – you all knew that sooner or later, Hiccup would go to Helheim's Gate. I mean, that's the whole point of these 'Hiccup runs away' fics. But I wanted to do something… different than other authors. I didn't want him to make this decision because of his compassion towards Berk or something like that. I needed it to be more serious, more personal. So, obviously, someone had to die.

And, believe it or not, I didn't plan to kill Zephyr since the beginning of this story. I knew perfectly well that the dragon raid would happen, and someone important would die. And I know that I have killed Steinar in the previous chapter, but let's be honest, he was an episodic character. I didn't bother myself with describing the interactions between him and Hiccup because it wasn't important. So, the character I had to kill had to be close to Hiccup; I didn't even consider Berkians, I guess you know why. At first, I considered Heather. Now, from the story's point of view, her loss would be the least painful one. I mean, Hiccup, Eret, and Cami would be devastated because she is their friend. I thought about this idea for a long time, but in the end, I've realized that it wouldn't have such a strong impact on Hiccup, and I needed him to be shattered.

The second option was Eret or Cami. They are newlyweds, they've got married the day before, and one of them would have died in the last chapter. They would be a married couple for less than a day before one of them became a widow/widower. The one that would survive would be devastated, I'm sure of it, and Hiccup would share their despair and anger. But yeah, these wouldn't have been his feelings. This scenario would have worked if Hiccup was the one that wanted to go to Helheim's Gate, but his friends persuaded him not to go. But, it's the other way around.

And so, that left me thinking: whose death would make Hiccup suffer the most? It was only two months ago that I've realized that there was one person on Dreki who was more dear to Hiccup than anyone else. That person was Zephyr. At first, I rejected this idea, but the more I thought about it, the more sense it made. So, I also have to apologize for how I've been preparing you for her death. I mean, the main reason why I've included so many scenes between Zephyr and Hiccup was to make you see and feel their love and their relationship. And I needed his anger to be your anger, and his despair to be your despair. And I disagree with an anonymous reviewer who said that the thought of Zephyr being hurt would be enough to make Hiccup go to Helheim's Gate. I mean, I didn't even have to kill anyone, and Hiccup would go to the nest, but then it would be like 'well, we had been attacked, so we have to fight back.' That's it. It would be… mechanical, I guess? And I needed it to be personal. So, once again, I'm sorry, but Zephyr had to go. And I disagree that I took 'an easy way out.' Believe me, you have no idea what I've been going through when I was writing Zephyr's death. At this point, it felt as if I was killing my own child. If I chose an easy option, no one would have died in the last chapter.

And there was one more reason why I've killed off Zephyr – because I haven't read a story in this fandom in which an author would have the courage to do something that drastic. And I wanted my story to be different than the other ones.

Also, I have to congratulate for his review. I mean, he said that this story 'is not all sunshine and rainbows, it is very brutal and bittersweet,' and I couldn't have said it better myself. I mean, there is a reason why this story is M-rated. I wanted to make something different than the rest of the authors on and not go for a 100% happy ending, simply because I find them boring and unbelievable. I mean, what's the point of writing/reading when you know what's going to happen to the main characters? I want you, as my readers, to worry about my characters, and not take them for granted. Besides, DreamWorks had some balls to kill Stoick in Httyd 2, a few minutes after Hiccup's family has been reunited. Well, I mean, that's kind of fucked up as well.

However, to atone for what I have done in the previous chapter, I can promise you that there will be no more drastic events like that. There might be a character death somewhere along with the story, but it won't be nearly as horrible as what happened in the previous chapter.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 24

Hiccup's legs were numb when he walked through the forest, and the freezing cold of the winter had nothing to do with that. His eyes were unfocused, and he wasn't sure if he was even breathing. His brain wasn't registering such things; the only thing he was aware of was the weight of his daughter's body in his arms.

Toothless was walking a few steps behind him, keeping a respectful distance. He shared his rider's grief, having grown used to Zephyr's presence over the past four years. The Night Fury was crooning sadly from time to time, looking between Hiccup and his daughter, whose body was wrapped in a linen shroud. The young chief kept his hands beneath her knees and her back, carrying her one last time.

He had no idea for how long he's been walking. Time ceased to exist as he made his way through the forest, heading deeper and deeper into the island that was his home. At some point, the terrain started going upward. Hiccup seemed not to notice it as he traveled across the snow-covered ground.

His friends and his people stayed in the village, cleaning up the mess after the dragon raid. Some of them wanted to follow Hiccup; the young chief only replied by saying that he wished to be alone. Toothless was the only one who accompanied him as he went to bury his only child.

The sky was already dark when he found a clearing deep in the forest. Hiccup laughed humorlessly when the irony of the situation hit him with full strength. Two weeks earlier, he found a similar clearing where he dug the grave for Dagur – the man responsible for Sigrid's death – the man who was the source of his peoples' suffering. And now, he was about to dig out a grave for Zephyr.

Tears were freezing on his face, stinging his cheeks, and his beard was covered with small crystals of ice. He sighed heavily, carefully laying Zephyr's corpse on the ground. Hiccup sobbed loudly while he caressed softly his daughter's cheek, even with the linen shroud wrapped tightly around her entire body, as he used to do so many times over the course of the past four years. Swallowing a wave of fresh tears that threatened to start falling from his eyes, Hiccup stood up, slowly approaching Toothless.

The Night Fury was sitting at the edge of the clearing, watching its rider with a mournful look in its eyes. Hiccup met its gaze with his own blank stare as he picked up the tools he had prepared for himself. With a shovel in his hand, he returned to the center of the clearing; the snow was creaking softly beneath his boots.

The snow was falling on Hiccup's hair, but he paid it no mind as he kept digging in the ground. Another blizzard was upon Dreki, ready to swallow the terrors of the day with a soft white layer. But nothing would be able to hide the chief's suffering. Nothing could make him forget that he was responsible for what has happened.

Each time he buried the shovel in the ground, his mind kept telling him that it was his fault. He refused to help his father and go to Helheim's Gate. It was his decision and his decision only. He foolishly believed that they would be safe from the raids, but they weren't. He ordered Zephyr to hide in their house, hoping that she would find shelter in there, but she didn't. As the minutes passed, the hole in the ground was getting bigger and bigger, and so was the hole in Hiccup's heart; it had the shape of his daughter.

Once again, he cried loudly, stopping his work for a few seconds. Fresh and old tears were stinging his eyes, clouding his vision. He failed his daughter, and he failed his village by falsely believing that they were safe. And after almost four years, long after her death, he failed Sigrid again by not being able to protect their child. Hiccup swallowed heavily a large lump that appeared in his throat.

Clumsily, he walked out from the grave he had prepared for Zephyr. His legs refused to work properly, and the ground beneath his feet was slippery. His heart was pounding heavily against his chest as he looked at his daughter's remains, wrapped tightly in the linen shroud. For a split second, he thought about removing the clothing to look at her face one last time. He ditched that idea at the last moment; he wasn't strong enough to once again see Zephyr's charred corpse.

Hiccup picked her up carefully, with the same affection that he used to do her entire life. Zephyr's body was no longer warm against his touch, and it would never be again. He kneeled in front of the grave and slowly lowered his daughter's corpse into the hole, careful not to do any more harm to her.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered softly, caressing her cheek with hesitant fingers. He didn't know what else he could say as he placed her on the ground. "At least I know that you are with your mother now, in Valhalla," Hiccup added, trying to comfort himself. He straightened himself up and walked to Toothless. The Night Fury was closer to its rider than before, sitting respectfully a few meters away from the grave. Hiccup looked at him with unseeing eyes as he picked up Zephyr's ax that was attached to the saddle.

Hiccup turned around, returning to the grave; the small weapon felt unusually heavy in his hands, just as his heart in his chest. "You will need this in Valhalla," the young chief whispered softly, placing the ax on Zephyr's body. "Tell your mother that… that I'm sorry," he added, sobbing loudly. With shaking hands, Hiccup picked up the shovel and started filling in the grave with the dirt he dug out previously. Each time a patch of dirt landed on Zephyr's corpse, Hiccup felt as if someone was tearing his heart apart, piece by piece.

He had no idea how much time had passed when he finished burying his daughter, but the sky was still dark. He was sitting on the snow with Toothless right beside him. The ground beneath him was cold, but he paid it no mind; he kept staring at the brown spot that stood out in the middle of the small clearing. He was rocking back and forth, holding his knees with his arms. After a few more minutes, he picked up his pipe, filling it with dried leaves. He placed the wooden object in front of Toothless's snout without saying a word. The Night Fury immediately understood what its rider asked for and ignited the pipe's content.

"I'm so sorry," Hiccup cried out, not bothering himself with holding back the tears. "I thought I was doing the right thing," he said, attempting to justify himself. "Please forgive me," he muttered, barely able to speak through the tears. "I've always had one purpose in my life – to keep you safe. I've made all my choices with that one thing in mind. That's all I ever wanted," he explained, breathing in the smoke from his pipe from time to time. "Sigrid," Hiccup said, raising his head to look at the sky above him. The stars were shining brightly, illuminating the night. "I am sorry that I've failed to keep our daughter safe," he apologized, sobbing loudly once again. "I'm sure you're angry with me right now and believe me, I'm too. But I swear to you," Hiccup added through gritted teeth. His despair was slowly turning into hatred. "I will not allow Zephyr's death to go unavenged. I promise, and all the gods in Asgard are my witnesses, I will leave no stone unturned before Helheim's Gate is reduced to ruin," he said, hoping that his beloved one would hear him. "I swear it to you, my love, and to you, Zephyr," Hiccup added.

He gasped loudly when the realization hit him with full strength – he had promised other things to his daughter. He had sworn the day before that he wouldn't allow anyone to hurt her again. He promised her that she would get married one day, and now, his promises would be left unfulfilled; he failed to keep them. Hiccup stood up, letting out a loud groan.

"Þat mælti mín móðir," he started singing Zephyr's lullaby hesitantly. Despite always liking that song, at that moment, it seemed that the words refused to leave his mouth. "At mér skyldi kaupa, fley ok fagrar árar, fara á brott með víkingum, standa upp í stafni, stýra dýrum knerri, halda svá til hafnar, hǫggva mann ok annan, hǫggva mann ok annan," he sang the song he learned from Sigrid – the one his love used to sing when she was putting Zephyr to sleep when she was an infant. And he continued singing for a few more minutes, putting his daughter to sleep one last time.

It was still dark when Hiccup returned to the remnants of his house. He wasn't going to sleep there, but he knew he had to salvage as much of his belongings as possible. With hesitant steps, Hiccup walked up the stairs that led to his hut.

The interior was as he expected it to be – burned; ashes and burned wood covered the floor. Hiccup walked through the charred remnants, attempting to find anything that survived the fire.

His search led him to his room. The wooden stairs protested loudly with each step he took, threatening to collapse at any second, but he paid them no mind. His thoughts were focused only on Zephyr, and he didn't care if something happened to him; he had no reason to live anymore.

As he expected, his armor and his sabirs survived the fire, although the weapons' scabbards have been burned entirely. The chainmail that he crafted out of the Gronckle Iron remained untouched as well. Hiccup picked his equipment up and walked downstairs, somewhat satisfied that his most precious belongings remained undamaged.

As he walked down the stairs, carrying his equipment, the burned wood gave up under his weight, and Hiccup fell to the floor. He coughed violently when the stirred ashes made their way into his mouth and some of them even into his lungs. His butt was aching because of the impact.

The young chief threw most of his stuff to the side as he stood up suddenly; anger was fueling each and every one of his movements. The only things he kept holding were the two sabirs.

He yelled loudly as he started swinging his weapons at everything that was within his reach. The burned woods offered no resistance against the razor-sharp blades as Hiccup attacked them furiously, furthering the damage that was already done. The young chief was kicking, cutting, and punching everything that he could reach. He was blowing off steam on the innocent interior of his house as he tried to satisfy his anger and despair, but his effort turned out to be in vain. Nothing could have made him feel better at that moment because nothing was going to bring Zephyr back.

Hiccup yelled angrily again, as loud as he could, not caring if he would wake up any of his villagers. His scream transformed into weeping as he fell to his knees, burying his face in his hands. Tears were running down his cheeks, and some of them were sipping through his fingers. He kept crying shamelessly; there was no shame in mourning after one's child.

After a few minutes of sobbing on the floor, Hiccup removed his hands from his face. His body was still trembling uncontrollably as he looked down at the wooden planks below his knees. If it hadn't been done already, at that moment, his heart was ripped out from his chest.

There, right in front of him, was lying the stuffed Night Fury – Zephyr's favorite toy. Once again during that night, Hiccup wept loudly, picking up the fake dragon. He caressed it with his fingers, recalling the day when he gave it to his daughter.

Toothless nudged his side, offering to comfort his rider in any way possible. Hiccup smiled weakly at his best friend, stroking his snout.

"I guess it's just you and me now, bud, as it had been years ago," he whispered; his throat was dry and coarse because of his screams. Toothless crooned in confirmation, nudging its snout against Hiccup's head. "We must return to Helheim's Gate," the young chief said after a moment. "We have to find a way to destroy the nest," he added, gritting his teeth. The Night Fury growled quietly, agreeing with its rider. "For Zephyr," Hiccup finished.

As if he wanted to express his agreement, Toothless roared loudly. It was a roar unlike any other he had ever let out. Even though everyone on Dreki knew the sound of the Night Fury, those who weren't asleep trembled after hearing it. It was a roar that sent shivers down everyone's spine, bringing with itself a promise of revenge and death.

That's it for today, I'm sorry that it was so short and that it was mostly my own thoughts, but I needed to include these two scenes. I hope you still enjoy my story, and please leave a review.