10 Years Later

Part I/II

Dear Tris,

I've received all your postcards, timely handwritten letters, abbreviated e-mails and our lovely granddaughter's finger paintings of our family trip to Florida so you can immediately quit harassing the poor mailman. He was never the one at fault. It's me who has been keeping quiet about your letters and ignoring your calls. It started off as a pesky manoeuvre to let you and your siblings' calls go straight to voicemail and pretend that everything was alright. Afterall, ignorance is bliss. It became easier for your mother and I to play pretend where I wasn't sick and she didn't bawl her eyes out every night in our bathroom.

I never thought of it as being unfair to all of you. I didn't want anyone to unnecessarily worry about my health and become a bother in your lives. I guess I was wrong. Do not give your mother a hard time about what I did. It was my decision. Initially your mother wasn't ready to support my decision at all. She thought I was being extremely selfish and inconsiderate and I see it now. Crystal clear. That's why I decided to dedicate what's left of my life to write a letter to each of your sibling and especially to Natalie, my wife.

You're my most sensible and level-headed child. I usually don't expect much from Caleb even though I see so much of my younger self in him and Christina is more like your mother- unconventional, stupidly brave yet near-sighted. You're somewhere in the middle. I always knew it in my heart you'll be the kid who reaches to the top. You've always been so unique, authentic and true to your emotions.

I vividly remember the day you broke the news about your pregnancy to us and how sure and confident you sounded when you announced that you were going to keep Leah and raise her on your own. I didn't doubt you, not even for a second. You know exactly what you want from the universe and what it wants you to do. Leah is all I could've hoped for in a grandchild. She's just as smart and beautiful as you. I'm truly grateful for all the moments we got to spend together. When she gets older and asks about me, I hope you tell her about all the idiotic stunts I've pulled and my elaborate pranks on all of you.

I don't understand why you're always worried about your next step. Go get that car you want, quit your job and find a better one, buy that expensive bottle of perfume, and take your daughter on spontaneous road trips. Stop hesitating. Don't keep feeding into your negative thoughts. Don't repeat the same mistakes I made when I was younger. Live. Live. Live. Stop second guessing your decisions and move on. You'll always have us to fall back on but I know you'll never need our help to get back on your feet. Promise me you'll do what you want to do.

I'm trying to make my imminent death as easy and less worrisome as it can get. I've sorted all the documents related to my will with my lawyer already. I've paid for a spot in the graveyard besides our neighbourhood church and picked a gravestone and a coffin. There's nothing much left to do besides collecting my death certificate from the hospital and holding a funeral for me. You can organize it however you want, after all, funerals are for the living.

A couple of months ago I had invested some of my money in real estate. It's a beach house in Beverly Hills. I have absolutely no intention of using it as you may remember I have a severe phobia of drowning in the ocean. However, I do want that luxurious house to be transformed into something extraordinarily transcendent yet a warm and inviting space. And if there's someone I know who will be excellent at this job, it's you. THE HOUSE IS YOURS!

I choose to believe that I have accomplished all my goals and desires. I don't have any regrets. I hope none of you or any of my friends or distant relatives have a bone left to pick with me. Remember that all my past frustrations and anger has been a result of my own weaknesses and lack of composure. I made a gigantic mistake in assuming the role of a closed-off, broody, and cold father when I held your sister in my arms for the very first time. And I unlearned those habits as quickly as possible when I realised my children had become scared of me.

Everybody told me I must be strict in order to discipline my children and prevent them from walking down the path of drugs, sex and everything wrong with this world. And I blindly followed their useless, pathetic advice only for my own children to be quietly afraid of me. The day I found out that Christina felt more comfortable bringing her boyfriend home behind my back, I came to a bitter realisation about my attitude and promised myself that one day I'll be worthy enough to earn my own children's trust. I hope I've become worthy enough to earn everyone's trust now that the time is nearly over.

Your mother often asks me if I'm scared of the end. Being brutally honest, I used to worry day and night about what would happen when Dr. Greene would sign off the death forms, release my rotting corpse and what would it mean to be buried. The end felt so meaningless yet so obvious. I got frustrated thinking about the uselessness of it all.

However, I've perfectly understood that life isn't about how it ends but rather about the journey. I started off as a young boy who tried to conquer his own little world of bugs, mud, and mathematics, transformed into a young man contemplating his future decisions, falling in and out of love, flying high and crashing hard, then became a father of three wonderful children and a husband to the love of my life. I've had a good life. Yes. I've had a good life for sure. And I would pay a million dollars to relive all of it. All the ups and downs, heartbreaks and sweet memories, mishaps and drunken mistakes, fights with Natalie and our secret morning drives.

So, thank you for giving me this magical and adventurous journey. I'm eternally grateful to all of you.

Make your dreams come true.

Love,

Your dad

You have an instant message from Tris:

Tris: Why didn't they tell us, Chris? Did we not deserve to know that our father has numbered days left?

Christina: Tris, It's not like that. They didn't tell us anything because they wanted to protect us.

Tris: Protect us from what? We're grownups with kids and a family and a job. We should've spent all of our time looking after dad and creating fond memories for the very last time.

Christina: You're right. We're adults. It's not like we have never experienced death of a loved one before. I think dad didn't want us to see him as a burden or even pity him.

Tris: Then, he was absolutely wrong. How can a caring parent ever be a burden to his kids? He taught us everything we know today. He never judged any of us for our stupid, horrible mistakes. I remember he used to give me pretty stones he found at the quarry because he knew how much I loved collecting shiny things.

He should've told us earlier, Chris. He should've told us.

Christina: It's too late to repent over this now, Beatrice. He did what he thought would be the best thing for us. Was he wrong? Yes, horribly wrong. But he kept us in the dark so that we wouldn't treat him any differently and continue to think of him as a strong, confident and loving father.

Tris: I feel like screaming into a void. Are we supposed to be just alright with everything now? What do we do now?

Christina: I don't know, Tris. I feel helpless at the moment. I haven't eaten or slept properly in days. I don't have an answer for you. Sorry.

Tris: No, Chris, you don't have to apologize for anything. Come down here. I think spending some time together will help us figure out our feelings and move on.

Christina: Hmm. I've already booked a flight and packed my suitcase. I'll be there in no time. Have you talked to mom recently? I'm worried about her. She's never lived alone in her entire life. And Caleb. He isn't answering his phone.

Tris: I'm going to stay with mom for a couple of weeks so she can figure out a new routine. I've been telling her that she should live with aunt Mariah. They'll keep each other occupied. It'd be good for their hearts. She'll be fine, Chris, I promise.

Caleb is having a tough time digesting what has happened. He keeps to himself these days and doesn't speak much. I tried talking to him but nothing worked. I think he'll only listen to what you have to say, Chris. He's always been fond of you. Call him soon.

Don't worry about anything. Everything has been taken care of. Just get here as fast as possible.

Christina: Thank you, Tris. You've grown up so much. I'm baffled. I'll ring Caleb tonight and try my best to put him at ease with the situation. I think I want to stay with you and mom for a few days too. I'll even convince Caleb to stay over. It'll be good for all of us, I think.

Tris: Good idea, Chris. Mom will be happy. Take care please. I'll see you soon.

Christina: Take care of yourself too, Tris. Goodbye.

Dear Tris,

I heard about your father, Tris. And I am so sorry. Andrew was and will always continue to be one of the most wonderful men I ever had the opportunity of knowing in this lifetime. You know as well as I do, I have spent most of my life chasing the most perfect and flawless version of myself. I was twenty-one when I realised that I was modelling my entire personality after Andrew. I admired your father throughout my childhood and adulthood. I used to snoop around your house to find out as much as possible about him. I don't know if I should be embarrassed or not admitting this but I maintained a secret diary where I wrote all the things I admired about your father and how to inculcate those habits in myself as well. I was a weird kid for sure.

When I became a teenager, I remember Andrew called at our house once and asked for me. I was a bit surprised that he wanted to talk to me because in the forty years of our friendship not once has Mr. Andrew Prior ever called me. It was always Natalie who would call us every other day looking to chat up my mom or check if you were sleeping over at my house. would call us every other day looking to chat up my mom or check if you were sleeping over at my house. I was too curious to not talk to him so I picked up the phone and greeted him.

Apparently, Andrew wanted to go on a walk with me the next morning to lecture me about manhood and becoming an adolescent. I agreed passively but I was groaning all day long. You know I hate being lectured. I can't stand listening to someone talk for more than five minutes at most. It's a pet peeve of mine. But I had to stay true to my word the next day. I woke up at 6 am and dragged myself to the neighbourhood park. Your father was sitting on a bench, a cup of black coffee in his hand, hypnotically staring at the trees, flowers and the gardener trimming bushes. I sat down next to him quietly. We acknowledged each other's presence but ten minutes had passed before any of us decided to speak. And when we did, oh boy, was it downright amazing.

He didn't talk to me as if I was a 13-year-old boy without any knowledge about the real world, instead he spoke to me as if I was a capable, intelligent and smart young man. He made me feel respected and worthy. He told me about the importance of being confident, ambitious, eager and hard-working. But the best of all was when he told me that I could confide in him and he wouldn't tell a soul. Your father knew many of my well-kept secrets till date. My respect and admiration for him grew immensely that day. He was genuinely a mentor to me; someone my own father couldn't become for me.

I'm attaching a page from my diary that I think clearly portrays what Andrew was like as an individual and an amazing father.

How to become a good human being?

-Always speak politely and eloquently

-Do not be afraid of going after what your heart wants

-Taking a shower every day is important. You CANNOT skip taking a shower for a week straight

-A brave man always expresses his deepest emotions and never stifles them

-Ice cream is not dinner

-Stay connected with your roots

-Take everything you hear, listen or see with a pinch of salt

-Refrain from unnecessarily judging others

-Treat everyone with respect and kindness

-Learn how to tie a tie

-Stop groaning every time someone wants to talk to you

Well, uh, you may have noticed some odd advice here and there your father gave me and not at all what my mom told me to write down whens she was in a rage fit. Anyway, how are you holding up, Tris? I understand this is a tough situation for you. Always remember that I am here for you. Do not hesitate to ring me up if you need something at any time of the day. I'm staying in town for a couple more days so you can come visit me or I'll come see you whenever you're free. I would love to catch up with you after all these years.

Take care of yourself and little Leah.

Love,

Tobias

To: Tobias

From: Tris

Subject: Catching up?

It was good to hear from you the other day, Tobias. In this modern world, a lot of people have completed stopped writing traditional letters to each other, instead they write short emails, incomprehensible texts and use idiotic abbreviations. It's refreshing to know someone out there is still taking out the time to hand write a letter to a dear one. Well, that was highly hypocritical of me considering the fact that I'm writing this quick email because I have absolutely no time to sit and write. I've been totally occupied by making arrangements for the funeral. No one ever told me that dying requires a hellish amount of paperwork and finding old documents.

Besides that, I had zero clue that my dad gave you the whole "Now-you're-a-responsible-and-independent-young-man" speech. And at six in the morning! What got into my dad that day, I wonder? Let me inform you about the origin of this entire tradition. When my sister, Christina, turned 13 and got her first period, my mom took her out for a mini vacation and they had the best time of their lives together. Christina came back with a lot of knowledge about being a responsible, young woman than she did before. My mom did the same thing when I turned 13. You should remember this, Tobias. You were extremely jealous that I got to go on a spontaneous trip all alone and that my mother didn't invite you at all. It was a pretty fun day teasing you and showing off my new things.

Anyway, dad got a bit jealous that mom got to spend so much time with the girls alone and he had to bear with the inside jokes for a couple of months straight. So, he decided to create his own tradition for welcoming young boys and girls into adulthood and teach them about the importance of being punctual, polite and present- 3 Ps of Adolescence brought to you by Mr. Andrew Prior, local entrepreneur. I'm glad he helped you lift your self-esteem and boost your confidence. His forte was to help people feel better about themselves. It was good to know he became a mentor to you and guided your way through young adulthood. My father was wonderful like that.

I'm doing fine, I think. I miss my dad and his pathetic jokes. It's hard not to picture him standing, talking to people or laughing while watching television all around the house. The place is much gloomier without him. Things have gotten a bit easier since Christina and Caleb decided to stay with me and mom for a couple of days. It reminds of our childhood days. I miss those times when we wouldn't give a shit about anything. Now we're adults and our lives have immensely changed.

I just realised we haven't properly talked to each other in quite a while. It's always been rushed calls, dry texts and quick emails. It's been a long long time since I've bored you to death talking about absolutely random things in life. Call me whenever you find time. Or if you're coming down to Chicago for the funeral, let's catch up over a couple of drinks. It's been long overdue, Tobias. Hoping to talk to you soon!

P.S. I was reminiscing one day reading through our old emails and I read something about a missing letter that never found its way to me. If you remember where it is then do not hesitate to mail to me even after 10 years have passed. I'm making a scrapbook of our childhood memories together. This letter should come in handy.

You have an instant message from Tobias:

Tobias: Zeke! She remembers! Tris never forgot about it.

Zeke: Huh? Tris remembers what?

Tobias: The letter!

Zeke: I'm so confused, Tobias. What the hell are you talking about? Are you and Tris finally together?

Tobias: What? No, we're not together. One day maybe if I can get that letter to her somehow. I don't even know where I lost it.

Zeke: Are you blabbering about that letter you wrote for her 10-15 years ago?! Tobias, come on! You're both adults. Just tell each other your feelings out loud and get it over with.

Tobias: If only it were that easy, Zeke. We've never been able to get our timing right. But I don't know, this time everything feels right. I just need to find a way to get that letter back to Tris.

Zeke: What do you mean the timing feels right? Does this mean you have finalized your divorce? Oh, Tobias…

Tobias: I've ended everything with Nita. It literally took decades to get every single detail down on paper from alimony to custody but we've settled everything.

Zeke: Are you happy with this decision? What about your kid?

Tobias: It's hard to say. Letting Nita go was bittersweet. We have history together. Honestly, I don't even know where everything went downhill. Who did what? Who said what? On the flip side, I can take a deep breath and focus on what I really want. It's not easy but I'm powering through it. And talking about (insert his son's name), thankfully we have joint custody over him.

Zeke: I know what went wrong. You chose the wrong person and you never tried to hide that fact from Nita. The way you were constantly occupied with Tris and Leah whenever they visited or when you would disappear from parties only to be later found doing some drunk shit with Tris. You made it so obvious to Nita that Tris mattered more to you.

Tobias: I never knew it was that obvious. I should have been a better husband to her. Trust me, I'm paying the price for my actions.

Zeke: What about the letter now? Do you have any idea where it could possibly be?

Tobias: All I can recall is that Robert, Tris' ex-husband, had hidden it somewhere in their old house. He'll know where it is.

Zeke: Good luck convincing that son of a bitch.

Tobias: Thank you. God knows I need it.

To: Leah

From: Park

Subject: How are you?

Hey, I heard about your grandfather. Sorry, Leah, please let me know if there is anything I can do to make you feel better, okay?

So, where are you now these days? Are you still working as a chemist downtown? We should meet up if you're already here in Chicago for your granddad's funeral. We haven't been able to see each other for a pretty long time. It'd be fun to catch up, what do you say? Bring your boyfriend too. What was his name? Chris? I don't remember much these days. Anyway, it would be nice to see you sometime.

Take care.

To: Park

From: Leah

Subject: Re: How are you?

Hey, Park. It's good to hear from you. I can't recall when was the last time we even talked to each other. I'm coming to Chicago tomorrow morning. I'll be probably staying with my mom and grandma for a couple of days before heading back to Colorado. And, yes, I would love to meet up with you. It has indeed been quite a long time. Unfortunately, Matt and I broke up a year ago. I have been very single and lonely these days. Anyway, I'll answer all your questions when we see each other.

Thank you for looking after me, Park. See you!

You have been added to a text group 'Reunion' by Shauna:

Shauna: Welcome everyone! Since we're all coming down to Chicago this time next week, I thought we should meet up for a mini reunion.

Zeke: If there's drinks, count me in.

Uriah: Oh! We should try out that new paintball place. I've always wanted to go there.

Shauna: I was thinking of something quieter and more elegant like a luncheon or a nice dinner.

Uriah: Meh, that's boring. Let's have some action.

Marlene: Uriah, you broke your left leg a couple of days ago. You can't go running around with a stupid paintball gun in your hand.

Uriah: :'(

Tris: What did you do to break your leg, Uriah? Aren't you like 40 now?

Marlene: He slipped on the bathroom tiles. It was kind of funny. I'll send you some pictures.

Tris: It'll make my day. Haha.

Zeke: Forward them to me as well. Pretty please!

Tobias: Me too, Marlene.

Christina: So, are we having a dinner party or a paintball session? What's the final venue?

Will: I can prepare some baked desserts for everyone as a sweet treat.

Tobias: Will there be chocolate cake, Will?

Will: Definitely!

Tobias: Count me the fuck in baby.

Tris: Ah, never change Tobias.

Lynn: I'm up for the reunion but please don't bring your kids. I can't stand pudgy toddlers and arrogant teens.

Uriah: What about a potty-trained five-year-old?

Lynn: If it's your child, then it's definitely not potty-trained.

Tobias: Jesus, Uriah, what's going on? Haha.

Shauna: It's settled then. See everyone at The Pit. There'll be drinks, food and French pastries.

Zeke: Show up on time everyone.

A/N: Hey everyone…I don't know if all of you can tell but I'm a bit ashamed that I'm finally uploading after a whole year. Sorry! Last year was quite tough for me. I had to deal with the death of my grandmother and get admitted into university. Online college classes, exams and constantly staring at my phone gave me writer's block. I didn't even want to think about this story but here I am. I had forgotten how much I enjoyed writing this story and reading everyone's reviews. I just want to apologise to everyone and assure you that I will be finishing this story by the end of next week. There's only two more chapters left to write and upload. Everything is mostly finished. I only need to proofread and add a few narratives, that's all.

I know I've lost many of my readers but if you've been here since the beginning and have kept up with the story, please drop a review and PM me about what you think about it till now. I thank all of you for being patient and encouraging me to continue with this story.

Kindly leave a review and enlighten me with your thoughts! I deeply appreciate every single one of you. Thank you so so much for keeping up with my irregular uploads.

xoxo

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