Hello everyone! I know it has been about seven years since I updated, but I figured that now is better than never since I left everyone on a cliffhanger. I am planning on updating the rest of my stories and trying to keep up with them over the summer. I am really sorry about the delay, but life was definitely in the way and as of now I am in college as a student athlete which is very time consuming. Also, my writing style in this chapter is very different from the rest of my story because I have changed it over the years so I hope everyone likes it! Let me know if I should keep updating this story or maybe start a new one!

Holding A Heart Chapter 26

Heidi

Another month had passed since the death of Legolas and I found myself unable to cope with the misery. The emptiness that swallowed my soul was only allowing a shrivel of hope due to the new life growing inside of me. My previously small bump had now grown larger in volume and was noticeable under certain dresses that were beginning to be too small for me.

The days seemed to pass by in a blur of sorrow and my heart no longer leapt at the sight of things that used to bring me great joy. Without the love of my life, everything seemed hopeless and void of all meaning.

I also had questioned Haldir about what he had said to me when he returned Legolas' wedding band. Unfortunately, he informed me that he had no recollection of this happening at all. Confused and almost angry at the situation, I had the mind to go to the Lady of the Wood and ask her, but the funeral was the next day and preparations needed to be placed in order.

Word also had been sent to King Thranduil about his son's passing and he had attended the funeral which took place two weeks ago. His expression was stoic and apathetic for almost the whole service until I made my way towards the King with tears forming in my eyes.

I had drawn him aside when the ceremony ended and told him of our marriage held in Rivendell and he was shocked momentarily. However, this surprise then turned into gratitude. He thanked me for gifting his son with love for the last moments of his life and continually apologized for keeping the letters from my grasp. This action was very selfish and appalling for a King to commit in his words. Then, he had embraced me and began to sob uncontrollably. In that moment, I knew not what to do. I could only offer the King comfort by lengthening the hug.

The King then sensed something as our embrace was lifted, "Lady Heidi, are you pregnant?"

Through the droplets cascading down my cheeks, I nodded, "Yes, my King. Ten weeks to the day."

His expression turned slightly joyful yet still bleak, "You carry what is left of my son. I will see to it that this child has a seat of royalty in Mirkwood, as well as yourself."

I bowed to him with appreciation rising in my heart, "Thank you, my King. Words cannot convey my gratitude. I only wish that Legolas would have been able to meet this child."

Thranduil nodded in agreement, "As do I, but I thank you for giving me a piece of my son. He is not lost upon this world and this child will be a gift to all."

After Thranduil's departure, I stayed in Lothlórien with Arwen and planned to travel to Mirkwood once the Fellowship left. The King's words had instilled some hope within me, but the thought of going through this pregnancy without Legolas crushed me. This was the second time I had lost someone I truly loved and the weight of this situation wore on my heart heavily.

I had decided to take a walk later that day to clear my head after dinner to help rid myself of the agonizing memories of my lover. The trees whistled in the breeze of the evening and the sunset was a mirage of somber hues. As I began to distance myself from the dining hall, I heard Aragorn call after me.

"Heidi!" He jogged to catch up with me, I could tell the past month his grief was still potent but he wanted to help me as well. After all, Legolas was one of his closest friends and the pain was still very near to his heart.

The ranger caught up to me, "Would you mind if I accompany you?"

I nodded, "Be my guest. I have found that these strolls in the woods often help my mind rid itself of saddening thoughts."

"Then let us abandon our ill-minded thinking and take in the beauty of this forest," He said with a small smile.

We continued at a leisurely pace throughout the winding pathways of Lothlórien. A quiet peace had fallen upon the both of us as the dimly lit kingdom glistened in the pale moonlight. A myriad of sapphire hues reflected from every structure and brought a feeling of nostalgia. My mind drifted to how similar this glow of azure light resembled my late husband's eyes. Those two orbs could inflict numerous emotions upon my soul; weakness, lust, devotion, and now heartache.

I glanced at Aragorn and I could discern his uneasiness and melancholy. He too was struggling with the ambience of the woods that usually brought him great joy. To lose two very important individuals in a short time period was very distressing for him.

Suddenly, he broke the dismal silence, "Would you like me to tell you the story of how I met Legolas? It is quite amusing and would bring some light to the gloom of this eve."

"Yes, I would like that very much," I replied, my heart compressing at the sound of his name.

Aragorn began his story, "I was about twenty years of age and in the midst of one of my most exciting adventures. Gandalf was in my company and we headed to Mirkwood to find the creature, Gollum. When we arrived, we set out for the dungeons of the Woodland Realm. At this time, darkness was beginning to shroud the kingdom and the tales I had been told about Greenwood the magnificent were proven false. Gandalf and I found the cell where Gollum abode and we were shocked to find that he was missing."

I gasped, I remembered that Legolas had told me that they kept Gollum in their dungeons, but I never knew that he had escaped.

"Where did he go?" I asked inquisitively.

Aragorn laughed lightly, "He would be found in time, but not after some mischief took place. In the dungeons is where I first met Legolas. He was quite egotistical and had no knowledge of my lineage. I recall that he labeled me as an amada when I first saw him."

I let out a giggle, "He obviously knew not of your education in the language of the elves?"

Aragorn grinned, "Precisely, so we were not fast friends as some would call it. Legolas and the other guards blamed Mithrandir and I for Gollum's disappearance. However, this would begin the first adventure I would experience alongside Legolas. We set out for the forests of Mirkwood to ensnare Gollum, but he was nowhere to be found. In one moment, we delved too deep into the foliage and were met by a band of spiders. They became very aggressive and just as one was about to strike Legolas, I swiftly ended its life with my sword. He was reluctant to forgive me due to the differences in our races, but he eventually expressed his gratitude and apologized for his behavior beforehand."

The upward curve of my lips could not dissipate at the story Aragorn told me, I had not felt this type of amusement in a very long time.

"As I said before, he was a very stubborn elf and was not always the selfless person he was when you met him. Through the adventures we shared, I could tell that his demeanor had changed, especially when he met you," Aragorn confessed with an earnest glance.

My gaze turned downward and I was again met with the hurt of his passing. Quickly, I composed myself, "So what happened to Gollum? Where was he found?"

Aragorn drew in a breath, "Ah, that creature was skulking around one of the pools close to the dungeons. We thought that he had traveled a greater distance, but he was right under our nose. This caused Legolas and I to become more acquainted after his apologies for blaming Gandalf and I. We conversed for a while about our lives and made a pact to travel Middle Earth and embark on many adventures together. Those were some of the best years of my life."

He finished his story with a hint of despair glinting in his eyes and placed a hand on my shoulder, "He loved you very much, Heidi. I am extremely sorry for your loss. His death was something that none of us expected. His memory will be celebrated and the child will grow up to be an honorable elf. I am certain of this."

I choked back another sob, "Aragorn, I am so lost without him. He was everything to me and now that he has passed, I feel so empty. It is as if I have lost my heart and my only purpose of life is to give birth to this child."

The ranger caressed my arm in comfort, "I understand. Although, this child is a blessing and you should place your hopes in that. Legolas would want you to take this child and cherish it in his memory. And worry not about the loneliness that you feel, you have people who will be there for you and this child every step of the way."

More tears formed in my eyes and I wrapped my arms around Aragorn, "Thank you, Aragorn. I really needed to hear this."

He returned my embrace and suddenly a cool wind brushed across the two of us.

"We should return to our rooms, the weather is becoming quite cool and I wish to keep you healthy," Aragorn stated releasing the two of us from the hug.

I nodded and we began to walk with him towards our rooms. When we reached the tents, Aragorn gave me a look of empathy, "Remember, Heidi, you will never be alone. Quel kaima."

"Quel kaima, Aragorn," I replied with a soft smile.

Finding myself at the door of my room, I opened it and felt the brisk wind flow through its open windows. It was very late and everyone was already deep in their slumber. I collapsed onto the sheets of my bed and melted into the comfortable mattress. My mind was in a state of tranquility after the kindness Aragorn had offered me, and finally I was able to drift off into a peaceful sleep knowing that I was not alone.

Legolas

I inspected my surroundings and was absolutely mesmerized by the environment. A porcelain room with intricacies gracing every inch was enrapturing me in a sense of upmost peace and tranquility. There were many doors littering this room, as well as pure white light clearer than anything my eyes had ever beheld. The world I once knew was almost completely forgotten and replaced with this unimaginable paradise.

I took a few steps and noticed how painless this existence was. Moments before, I remembered writhing in pain from the effects of the poison that the orcs had inflicted upon me. Although this physical agony was immeasurable, the emotional anguish was even more severe. To hear that my beautiful wife was going to bear a child when I thought all ambitions to acquiring an heir or a family were lost was completely earth shattering due to the injury I had received. Fighting the excruciating illness with all of my strength in order to hold onto the person and future little one that I held dearest and for it to end up being futile was devastating.

My mind and body had been so fatigued to the point where the last words that had slipped past my lips were almost a release of all the emotions I felt for Heidi. She was the light of my life, the only person I held unimaginable passion for, and the woman whom I would lay down my life for. When she had told me during my last fighting moments that we were to be parents, my mind was whirring with sensations and utter elation even in my deteriorating condition. She instilled the last bit of strength I tried so desperately to muster. This woman was everything to me. However, in this new place I felt almost emotionless and as if those feelings on Middle Earth were almost minuscule compared to the ecstasy I was experiencing here.

I continued to examine my surroundings in greater detail until I reached an impasse. If I had not been in this palace of peace, my heart would have been rattling against my chest. Due to the state I was in, I now knew that my life on Middle Earth had ceased. This individual I had the pleasure of greeting was someone I never thought I would see again; even if I were to pass into the Halls of Mandos.

"Gandalf?" I questioned. The surprise was evident in my voice and he let a soft smile escape his serious profile.

My mind was whizzing with questions and even though this place emanated an aura of rest, I still found myself slightly bewildered by his presence. He appeared to be completely engulfed in a glowing white ambience comparable to everything in these halls. His face looked as if he would be a weary old man, but his stature revealed his inapprehensible power.

"Yes, Prince Legolas, it is me, Gandalf. Although, I have taken on a new name. I am Gandalf the White as of now," He paused and kept his gaze fixated on my eyes. The glare was intense as if he was peering into my soul.

"Let us walk together amongst these magnificent halls," he continued, leading me forward with a light touch on my arm.

I felt slight confusion at his demeanor, but walked alongside him nonetheless. Many questions were fleeting through my mind, but I only had the heart to ask him one.

Before I had the chance to speak, he broke the silence of my contentious thoughts.

"You fought very well, Legolas. I can sense the disarray in your mind which is completely forgiven under these circumstances." He kept a steady pace and I watched as we passed many more white doors.

My inner turmoil began to bubble over and I slowly revealed my innermost thoughts to the wizard. "Gandalf, why do I feel such guilt if I am supposed to be at peace with myself. This place is supposed to be a fortress for the weary and those who have lost their lives too early. Although I understand that my life was cut short, I have been struggling with relentless regret ever since I have stepped foot into these halls."

He chuckled ever so slightly, "My dear Prince, your affliction is a commonality among the people who dwell here. This place is a fortress of endless ecstasy accompanied by a harmonious ambience that helps people find their inner stillness."

Nodding to his words, I kept walking until we reached a door where he stopped. I could apprehend the presence behind the door and if I had not been in such a calm state, tears would have flowed incessantly down my cheeks.

The door opened gracefully, and from behind it stood a being of absolute allure. Long golden locks shimmered in the fluorescent glow of the room around me. Her eyes were identical to mine and I almost gasped at the sight of her and how well she looked.

Gandalf turned to me with a smile, "I will leave you two to catch up."

"Naneth?" I asked dumbfounded. Of course, I knew that she would be here, but the surprise of our meeting made me elated.

She embraced me in her warm and comforting arms that I had almost forgot the feeling of. The caress of her gentle hands down by back brought me even more contentment.

"Legolas, my son. How I have missed you!" Her words were smooth and sounded angelic. I could not tear my gaze away from her out of fear that she would disappear again.

Then, a concerned expression fell upon her face, "I am saddened that the pain you have experienced has led you to these halls. My passing must have been so hard on you, iôn."

I looked to the ground as I remembered the arduous times subsequent to her death, "It is forgiven, mother. I am in your presence now and that is all that matters."

She smiled brightly, but I could tell there was a thought lingering in her mind, "I have always watched over you. I wish I could have been there to see you grow into the honorable ellon that you were," she paused for a moment, "Legolas, I understand that you are having a lot of mixed feelings about this place, but I must ask you about your wife. She is pregnant, is she not?"

The sound of Heidi's name inflicted a light sadness upon my soul. Even in this place of rest, my wife still had an effect on my emotions.

My expression changed into a somber one, "Yes she is indeed, I wish I could have seen the birth of our child. The poison was simply too strong and I regret that I could not fight hard enough. Guilt is ravaging my heart and I feel that the longer I am here, my heart continually attaches to this place."

My mother took ahold of my hand and grasped it, "I understand, Legolas. My experience here was very similar. When I arrived, my heart felt very heavy but the Halls of Mandos have a serene effect on the soul. It retrieves all of your sadness and transforms it into light."

Her eyes were shining as the sentence left her lips, almost as if more of this amicable aura graced her appearance. However, it suddenly vanished into a more genuine look of seriousness.

The gaze that held elation moments before turned downward momentarily and I saw a tear fall down her cheek, "Naneth, what is wrong? Are you alright?"

She took in a deep breath, and began to speak, "Legolas, I know that this place instills tranquility into every fiber of your being, but you must return to Middle Earth."

Surprise glazed over my profile, "What do you mean? I cannot return to Middle Earth once my soul has passed into these halls."

"Yes, it is possible. Gandalf came to me so I could convince you to return from death. My feelings about this were also mixed for a short period of time because I wanted you with me once more. However, when I learned that Heidi was going to bear a child, I could not reject Gandalf's request," She revealed with a shaky breath.

Dumbfounded by her explanation, I embraced her once more, tears beginning to fill in my eyes as the flood of emotions began to overwhelm the setting.

"Mother, this place is so wonderful. I do not know if I have the heart to leave. I feel as if the call to the sea will become even stronger if I return to Middle Earth and I do not want Heidi or my child to succumb to the depression of an absent father or husband. She has already been through enough pain," My eyes were glistening with tears and sorrow all at once.

The former Queen of Mirkwood smiled at me and chuckled even in her reluctant state, "Legolas, my dear son, you will not feel that call to the sea. Your family will bring you so much joy that every other emotion will be shaded by the wondrous event of becoming a father. When I was pregnant with you, I remember even the smallest voice in my head telling me to head to the sea had vanished. You brought me the greatest gift of all, a beautiful and beaming son whom I will love for eternity."

A sensation of acceptance began to wash over me and a renewed sense of decisiveness inundated my mind, "You are right, naneth. I know that my life is unfinished and I must return to Heidi, my unborn child, and the quest. I cannot have my family continue in this perilous world without my protection."

My mother nodded with a smile, "Your story was quite unfinished, Legolas. I know that you will return to me someday. However, I hope our next meeting is on your own accord instead of fate," her expression held a restricted playfulness, "Please tell your father that I miss his presence dearly and that my heart belongs to him even in death."

"Of course, he still is quite reserved about your passing, but I can see that your words will bring him much peace," I paused to take in her appearance one last time; remembering the softness features of her face. The last time I had been with her she had looked almost identical. A kindness that could cast out all darkness within my soul accompanied by courage that could provide enough strength to fuel an army of thousands.

A few moments later, Gandalf reappeared and I knew that it was time to leave the Halls of Mandos as well as my mother.

With one last embrace, I forced myself to depart from her nurturing spirit, "Until our next meeting, mother. I love you very much and will yearn for your light in the dark world I am returning to."

"Your spirit is strong, Legolas. Never forget your courage and heart, it will serve you well in the tribulations you have yet to face. My love for you extends past the stars, iôn nin." I could feel her energy fading until it completely vanished before my eyes.

My heart felt heavy, but with reluctance I turned to Gandalf, "Thank you for everything Gandalf, I owe you my life for this."

He nodded, "There is no need, the war has only just begun. Your return to Middle Earth will bring joy, but the darkness that will ensue will be treacherous. You must be ready for this."

I sighed heavily, understanding the gravity of his words, "My mind has sensed what you speak of since our arrival in Moria. I am prepared for whatever I must do."

Gandalf took out his staff, "Well, let us return to the company and defeat Sauron once and for all."

He pointed the staff at the temple of my head and I felt flames of life enter my lungs. My existence was flashing before my eyes once more and I readied myself for the pain I was about to experience. White hot agony shot through me as I was being thrown back into my body; a lifeless corpse began to exhibit a rogue color and regain its strength again.

Finally, my eyes opened to my surroundings. The greenery of Lorien graced my vision and I was awoken to the sweet smell of nature. I only had one mission to think of in that moment and it had nothing to do with a quest or a ring of power.

I needed to find Heidi.

Heidi

A few days had passed since the conversation with Aragorn, and I found myself recovering from my grief little by little. Even though it was still very painful, the delight of bearing a child was finally setting in and I could not wait to meet him or her.

The Fellowship was preparing to leave Lothlórien in two days, so I was helping them pack up their belongings. In the time that I had spent with them, I grew particularly fond if the Hobbits. They were always bringing joy and humor into every situation and I felt the tightness of my heart loosen in their presence.

I found Arwen standing by one of the horses and I walked to catch up with her, she had a concerned look washing over her face.

"What is the matter, Arwen? Why do you look so forlorn?" I asked.

"Heidi, I have been discussing the safest passage to Mirkwood with Lord Celeborn and Lady Galadriel and they deem the journey fatal. I think it would be best if we stay here until the child is born," She admitted.

Shock registered on my face, I had planned to give birth to this child in the place where they would one day rule. This was the one place where I would desire for my child to spend their first few years.

"Are you certain? There is no possible route we could travel?" I questioned; hoping that there might be a small chance my dream could be fulfilled.

"Heidi," Arwen sighed, placing her hand on mine, "The Fellowship is being hunted by Orcs as we speak. Once they leave Lorien, their armies will gather around these borders and it will be impossible to escape their grasp. I cannot risk our lives or your child's."

Ultimately, her explanation was received and I realized that she was correct in her thinking. The life of my child was too important to risk, even if I wanted him or her to be born in the Mirkwood. However, an idea suddenly popped into my head.

"What if we rode to Rohan and settled there for a short while? We could reconvene and then decide whether Mirkwood would be safe," I proposed eagerly. Inside of my heart, I could not bear being close to where my husband had perished. To be anywhere else in Middle Earth would have sufficed my heart.

"Heidi, I do not know. Every road is perilous as of now, especially if we were to take the Anduin River," Arwen said gently.

My mind was racing, "What if we did not take the Anduin? We could cut across the Field of Celebrant and once we reach East Emnet we turn west towards Rohan. It would be a short journey, but it would let us explore more of Middle Earth before it turns even more treacherous."

Arwen mulled over my words for a moment and then exhaled, "I will not leave your side. So, if we are to travel to Rohan, then so be it. But if there are any threats, we must return here. It is your decision."

A smile crept onto my face, "Then Rohan it is. We will depart a fortnight after the company leaves."

That night, excitement began to rise in my body due to the adrenaline of embarking on a new journey. This would help to dislocate my thoughts from the agony of Legolas's death and hopefully if all is well, I would be able to return to Mirkwood and bear the child.

I placed my hand on my belly and took notice of the barely noticeable bump forming on my slender body. The child was growing quickly and the symptoms of pregnancy were held at bay for a while. Morning sickness had ceased to exist while I mourned the death of my husband, but the whirlwind of emotions was even more intense.

Even now with the buzz of adventure lingering in the near future, I could not evade the constant sadness that rustled within my heart. Every moment still felt futile without him in my arms. Lying in my bed, I remembered our wedding night and the hours we spent under the faded gleam of moonlight. Our bodies were entwined into one, every breath and touch lighting a fire inside of the both of us. That night, was everything I ever dreamed of and more.

I shifted positions in my bed and slowly drifted off into a slumber, remembering the softness of his skin and heat of his body.

A few hours into the night, I was awoken by a rattling coming from my window. One of my daggers was on the opposite side of the room and I felt the need to retrieve it. Carefully, I slipped out from under the covers and kept my footsteps quiet. The dagger was within my grasp and I went to grab it when a voice I never thought I would hear again cut through the air.

"Heidi," Legolas said with tears in his eyes.

This had to be a dream, a cruel dream orchestrated by some being in order to inflict more agony upon my soul. He could not be standing in front of me, I saw him die. This could not be possible.

He came closer to me and I flinched, "It cannot be. I saw you die, you are not real; only a figment of my cruel imagination."

My voice was wavering with sadness. As if the last two months had not been difficult enough, I had to deal with dreams of him returning to me.

"I can assure you that I am alive," His body closed the space between us and I felt the warmth and softness I desperately craved.

I accepted his embrace and held him tightly as if to never let him go. My mind was still in a state of shock and an overflow of elation flooded by body. Tears of joy sprung freely from my eyes and I convulsed into his arms. He lifted my chin up with his finger and placed his lips on mine. The kiss deepened and all of the pent-up emotion I had experienced was transformed into devotion and poured into him. It was as if our connection had rekindled and I began to sense his feelings of thankfulness and relief.

He was actually alive, and I intended to never lose him again.

A/N: Wooow what a chapter! What will happen when Legolas finds out about Heidi's plans to travel to Rohan? Will Legolas reunite with the Fellowship? Keep reading to find out! Onto reviews!

Doctor Legolas: Yes, I know Leggy's death was very sad to write about! But I'm glad he is back! Thanks for the review!