He was in the round room.
He wanted to cry. Not again! Why did this keep happening? Why did he keep coming back here? He hated the room, it was too much. There was too much… badness.
The shadows were still behind the doors. The necktie, now a full blown suit with tinted glasses, was still fighting the dinosaur. He tried to remember that the dinosaur was good, that it wasn't going to attack him, but save him. He took deep breaths and closed his eyes, trying to hurry up the dream to its inevitable ending.
"Raphie?"
His eyes flew open and he stared in shock. Donatello was next to him. He sounded young, but looked his normal age, with battle shell and goggles adorning his frame. He returned Raph's stare with equally wide eyes. "What's going on?"
There was a crash and a roar, and the dinosaur charged him. Raph felt himself get scooped up (how small was he?) and the dinosaur began pelting out of the round room.
"Wait, we forgot Donnie!" he yelled. The white room shrank to a narrow point as they thundered into darkness, a dash of purple shrinking with it. "We can't leave, WE FORGOT DONNIE!"
"We have to go back!" he gasped.
"To the future," Mikey mumbled, curling in on himself in sleep.
Raph looked wildly at him. His brother was on a couch. He was on the floor. He blinked. That's right, they were still in April's apartment. Had he actually fallen asleep? How long had he been out?
A glance at the window showed it was still dark outside. A glance towards the kitchen was met with four pairs of eyes staring at him.
Leo snickered, "good one, Mikey," even though his brother couldn't hear him.
"It was not," April said.
"Hey, he can't help that, he's got a broken… humerus."
She shoved his arm.
"Good morning," Augie greeted.
"Good morning," he repeated dumbly, heart still racing. He looked back in confusion at the window. "I think?"
Splinter grunted. "We tried to let you sleep."
"But now that you're up, come join our pre-dawn powwow." Leo motioned him over, a glint in his eye. "It's payback time."
Raph unsteadily got to his feet, nerves starting to ease somewhat. "I'm all for that."
A pot of coffee was on for those that needed it, though Leo had still somehow managed to find tea. He and Mr. O'Neil looked the most alert; April and Splinter had certainly never been morning people and he was surprised to see them up. A glance at April's closed bedroom door told him that Sunita was likely still in there. It seemed he wasn't the only one having a rough night, then.
Coffee would only make him more jittery, though, so he just sat down at the table. A sheet of paper with a rough drawing of the BAI headquarters was in the middle. "So where we at?"
Augie tapped the paper with his phone. "I was still connected to the internal system until an hour ago, so they've probably discovered I left willingly with you. Before I got locked out, though, the base had gone back to yellow alert." He hesitated, then looked apologetically at Raph. "Which means all the loose threats had either fled the scene or were contained."
His gut clenched. Either Donnie got out, or he was recaptured. And since he hadn't been able to contact them…
Raphie?
"Okay," he said, taking deep breaths. "Any idea where he could be held?"
"That's what we're trying to figure out." April pointed at the crude map. "The cells for Stinkbomb and Mrs. Nubbins are here, and Dad filled in all the rest of the areas."
"What about these cells?" There were smaller boxes next to where the big mutants were imprisoned.
"All empty," Mr. O'Neil shook his head. "Unless Bossma- Bishop- developed an invisibility cloak."
Leo leaned back in his seat, making the chair creak dangerously on two legs. "What's Ko-site-us?"
"Cocytus?" Augie blinked. "To be honest, I'm not sure. I always figured it was a branch office, but I've never been there."
"Bishop mentioned taking us there," Raph remembered, realizing what Leo was getting at. "Do you know where it is?"
"Like I said, I've never been." He frowned. "Although… I glimpsed part of it once on a video chat. Not much, mind you. Just some curving, white walls."
Raph's breath left him.
"… I remember thinking it was a little strange, as I didn't know any labs with curved walls, but Chaplin did say that he was-"
"Were there doors?" He swallowed hard, mouth dry. "Were there… there weren't any doors on those walls, were there? With shadows?"
Everyone was looking at him. His heart sped up and his anxiety rose with it.
"Well, I… maybe. Yeah. Yeah, I think I remember seeing the edge of a doorframe in the background."
"Raph, you okay?" Leo asked seriously.
He gulped. Doors. The round room was real. It was real! It couldn't be, it couldn't be true-
A tiny hand wrapped around his wrist, fingers stroking his pulse. "Easy, Red," his dad murmured, but his voice sounded heavy. Raph blinked at him, noticing that Splinter was looking down at the table. After a moment, he seemed to gather himself together, raising his head and looking tired. "I know where this place is."
"What?"
"You do?"
"How?"
Splinter kept a hold of his arm, tracing soothing patterns along his wrist as he spoke. "I have long believed Red's nightmares of this place to be memories. Now, with your description, it appears that is true."
Raph's breaths grew more ragged. "But when was I ever-?"
Pops tried to soothe his distress. "You were very young. I don't know how long you were there, but you were in the tunnels by the East River when I found you." Splinter finally looked at him with pain and determination filling his eyes. "Do you remember anything more about arriving in the round room?"
"I… I don't, that's not, this isn't-" He struggled for a moment, feeling nauseous. Breathe, Raph! He tried to focus on the comforting hand on his wrist.
"It… it always starts out in the sewers," he said slowly. "It's dark, and I'm alone, and I'm scared. Then the unfamiliar shows up and-" he squeezed his eyes shut. "And… carries me. Like it grabs me and carries me. I freak out and it gets darker, and then we enter the round room. And it's a bad place, I know it's bad."
There's silence. His father's hand stilled in tracing its patterns. He finally peeked open his eyes.
Splinter gave him an encouraging smile. "You are brave, my son." He turned his attention to Augie. "Could Cocytus be underground?"
"Possibly," the man responded, eyes widening. "You said the tunnels by the East River, and that's where the base is located. Raph, if you don't remember climbing any stairs or traveling aboveground, then Cocytus might just be right below HQ."
"That would also answer where they're keeping the Yokai," Leo perked up. "There wasn't a whole lot of time between Bishop's attack on Run of the Mill and our rescue attempt. Certainly not enough to stop at two locations. But, take the Yokai prisoners to the same destination, yet an underground entrance, and you've got everyone in the same place but with one group hidden."
The Yokai were in Cocytus. The shadows were behind the doors. A dinosaur was fighting a necktie, no, a suit, no, a man.
Bishop.
He had been dreaming of Bishop this whole time.
Raph pulled his arm away from Splinter. "Why didn't you tell me?"
His father looked heartbroken. "I did not think you would want to remember. I had hoped that these nightmares had long since stopped."
"But it happened!" he cried. "Something happened to me and I deserved to know!"
"I don't know what happened," Splinter's voice broke. "I don't know what happened in the round room. I found you back in the sewers, after the 'dinosaur' had saved you. I learned of the room through your nightmares and for many days I thought of finding it and burning it to the ground." He sucked in a breath. "But that was too dangerous. The best I could enforce was that you never went back there. That none of my sons ever wandered those sewers alone again."
Raph blinked and felt tears roll down his cheeks. He sucked in a shaky breath, suddenly terrified that he couldn't remember more of his nightmare. What had happened to him? What happened?
"Maybe nothing happened."
"Wha-?" He turned his head to Leo, unaware that he had been talking aloud. His brother watched him carefully.
"Raph, I mean, the way your dream goes you arrive in the room, see the fight, and then immediately get swept out of there. That's always how it's played out, and there's never been major variations, or any other dreams of that place. Maybe you weren't there for very long."
"But then how do I know the room is bad?"
He jumped in his seat as a warm arm circled him from behind. Mikey hugged him, head against his cheek, and he grappled awkwardly and desperately to hug back.
"You know the room is bad because you've always been empathetic, Raph," his baby brother whispered. "When other people are hurting, you hurt, too."
Almost on cue, his left arm twinged sympathetically with a glance at the sling, and he snorted. One of those disgusting, half-laugh half-sob snorts. The sound made him giggle, and Mikey hugged him tighter. He kept hugging him as he shook; hugged him through his strange cry-giggles and hugged him until his breathing began to even out. He blinked away the tears blurring his eyes and saw April pass him a tissue box.
"Thanks." Mikey relinquished his hold so he could blow his nose. His good arm lingered on his shoulder. Raph glanced self-consciously up at the group. "'m sorry about all this, guys."
"No, Raphael, I am sorry." Splinter made sure he was looking at him as he spoke. "You are right: I should have told you. I love you and I hate to see you suffer."
Warmth spread in his chest, and his voice hitched for a moment. "I love you, too, Dad." He looked down at the pile of used tissues. "Th-thank you."
Splinter's hand returned to his own. "We'll work through this, together."
"Right." Raph took a deep breath and properly looked back up at the group. Encouraging looks met his gaze. He crooked a watery smile at them.
"Well, if there's one thing I know about this place it's that nobody needs to be there. We've got a brother to rescue, and many others from the sound of it." He pulled the map closer to him. "So we need a plan…"