Chapter Twenty-Five
It was all arranged.
Well before midnight, most of the shipmates arrived. Rose lost track of how many they were but she could easily attest they all smelled of the sea. Jack, as she watched, didn't seem to mind at all as he spoke to one man after the next. After their hug in the lobby, which didn't go unnoticed, Rose was instructed to take care of the boys' and to have her dinner with them while the men discussed what was to take place later. It felt more to Rose that Jack wanted to capture Kingston in an act before he could do more damage to the family. When she stepped into John's room, she was surprised to see that the two were playing together.
"John! Why don't you pretend your race car is driving around there? Then I can pretend my horse is galloping around here!" William spoke.
Standing in the doorway, Rose gasped when she witnessed the two brothers' playing together. When she entered, it was John who looked up as he called.
"Mama! William's letting me play with his toys!"
"I can see that." She softly replied and she made her way over to a small table. She met William's eyes and he seemed to turn a color when he answered.
"We're playing horse and car, mama. Is it alright if we do that?"
"Yes. No need for permission here, William." She answered but she remembered the event which took place earlier that morning. William broke through and Rose could feel William as a little embarrassed with her watching them play. But to ease them, she walked over and noticing a small treat on the tray, she took it and then, after she squatted down, she held it to William and he smiled.
"Thank you, mama." He answered but instead of taking the treat, Rose was surprised when he stood and stepping over to her, he timidly gave her a hug. This made her pause completely when she soon felt warm tears touch her skin.
Even John was silent when he watched his older brother cry. Lowering the treat, Rose turned and opening her arms, let William fall into them as she whispered.
"It's alright, Willie. Everything's going to be alright. God has you; He has John; He has me and your papa."
"I… know… that… but…" William began but Rose could feel he was struggling to say something else.
"But… yes?" She asked.
"I… miss… my… real… mama."
Out of the corner of her eye, Rose watched as John stood. Then he made his way over to her and touching her elbow, she peered down at him. His eyes were wet.
"I… miss… mama, too." He softly whispered and without warning, he wrapped his arms around her stomach. Rose could feel her unborn baby still within her as John touched her belly. Though she was now 4 months, Rose realized her replacing Rachel was deeper than what was shown on the outside. Holding both John and William, Rachel's sons', Rose realized her role as their mother wasn't going to be easy. Replacing Rachel was something she could fulfill.
"Nor can I fill the void of their relationship with her." She thought as she placed her head against William's. He was still silently crying in her neck and John was starting to whimper. Here, she recalled William didn't cry once at the funeral. For a while, the silence engulfed them and Rose let the boys' cry their grief out. Knowing what it feels like to lose someone one loves… she too felt her own eyes fill with tears when Edward's image appeared before her. She glanced over and noticed a Crucifix above the fireplace.
Offering up a Hail Mary as well as an Our Father, Rose prayed for Rachel's soul and the strength to be the mother she would wish her to be as she held to the two sons' of Jack Dawson.