Disclaimer: I own nothing in regard to GWTW
Author's Notes: Thank you for all the reviews and feedback.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Rhett Butler was in his mother's townhouse. He was an extremely sick man. He had contracted cholera. He had a few lucid moments, and he knew his mother and his sister were both already dead. He knew he would soon be joining them although he didn't think they would be going to the same place. He hadn't been to the South in over two and a half years. Not since he had visited his mother in October of seventy-one trying to find out if Scarlett was pregnant or not.
He had not told his mother he was coming to visit her. He had never told her he was on his way. He always just showed up on her doorstep and she had always been happy to see him. If he had the common courtesy to inform her of his impending visit he would not be dying right now. No. Someone would have telegraphed him back that his mother was already dead and his sister near death. He could have waited until the epidemic was over and come and paid his respects to his mother and sister. He could have tied up their affairs and really left the South for good. Or finally gotten up the courage to tell Scarlett he loved her.
He had been such a fool to not tell Scarlett he loved her while they were in London together. He had been a fool to not follow her to Tara and beg her to marry him. He had been a fool to not tell her he loved her when they met in Atlanta three years ago. What had he been so afraid of? Why could he not tell her? Why could he not trust her? Why could he not tell her just to make her happy?
He saw a vision. It had to be a vision because his father had been dead for almost seven years. His father spoke to him, "I have been sent to give you one chance to change your life for the better. You will be returned for one day and you will have twenty-four hours to make the right decision for you to fix your life."
"I never did anything wrong."
"My son we don't have the time to go over all of the mistakes you made in your life. You don't have to accept the offer. You can go ahead and die."
"What is it going to cost me? My soul?"
"If you had one maybe. No, your mother and your sister have been pleading for the man with the long white beard to give you one chance to turn your life around. They told him that they really believe that you have a good heart. The man with the long white beard looked at your record and said, "There is little evidence that he has a good heart. The only altruistic act he has ever committed in his entire life was paying his mother and sister's living expenses." The man nonetheless was moved by their pleading and the good lives they have led. He has decided to give you one chance to do the right thing. If you do the right thing, you will be able to save their lives in addition to yours. The man has looked at your record and although he doesn't think you will forgo your pride long enough to do the right thing, he is giving you twenty-four hours to fix your life."
"Again, what is it going to cost me?"
"It will cost you your pride. Do you want the opportunity or not?"
Rhett was getting weaker, and he said, "Do I choose the day?"
"No, the man with the long white beard will choose the day. It will be the most decisive day of your life. I must warn you that if you fail, you will be brought back here and you will die as you were meant to in this timeline."
"The day that you disowned me for not marrying Sarah. I still won't marry her."
"I don't know what day he is going to send you back to. Damn but you are a stubborn bastard. You are too stubborn for your own good. For once think about someone else. Think about your mother and your sister."
He whispered, "Yes, take me to that day. I'll marry Sarah." He thought, 'I'll do what my mother suggested. Marry Sarah but live my life the way I want to live it. By marrying Sarah there will be no shame brought on my mother and sister. I'll find Scarlett and run away with her. Married or not.'
There was a whooshing sound, and a lot of lights then he was getting off the train at the Jonesboro Station. This was not where he thought he would be taken back to. He thought he would be taken back to the day his father disowned him or when he got kicked out of West Point or when he and Scarlett were at the Fire House.
He had been here before and instead of riding out to Tara and asking Scarlett to marry him he had gotten back on the train. He had been too afraid of her saying no. He had been too afraid of her using his love against him. He had been too afraid of her laughing in his face. He had been too stubborn to tell her he loved her because then she would win in their little battle. What had he won by not saying it? Six years of loneliness.
He didn't need to check the calendar. The date was September fifteenth. He knew why he was here. He had to get Scarlett to marry him. He had known what she had wanted. She had wanted him to tell her that he loved her. He just hadn't been willing to do it even though he knew she loved him. No, he had just stubbornly refused to tell her because she was trying to force him to say the words. He was going to have to swallow his pride. He was going to have to allow himself to be vulnerable in front of her. Not telling Scarlett he loved her was the biggest mistake of his life. She had been the only woman he had ever loved, and she had been the only woman he would ever love.
Rhett hired a horse and got directions to Tara. He would not leave until she had said yes to marrying him. After she said yes then he would tell her he loved her. He would just keep kissing her until she said yes. They would get married this very day.
As Rhett approached the house which was a remarkably interesting design. He wondered if Mr. O'Hara had a plan in the beginning or just added on rooms as the mood struck him. He saw Scarlett was sitting on the porch rocking Ella. She looked so beautiful. Her hair was rather unkept, but he thought she still looked wonderful. Her face was fuller which surprised him. It gave her a softness that she normally didn't have. He saw the sleeping Ella taking up most of Scarlett's lap even though the child wasn't any bigger than a minute. Rhett got off his horse and he thought 'I have never been more uncomfortable or nervous.' He would just have to pretend he was poised and self-confident. He strutted up the steps to the porch and he thought, 'At least I haven't lost my strut. I will just get her to agree to go back to London with me first. Once she agrees to that then I will ask her to marry me.'
Rhett said, "Good afternoon, Mrs. Kennedy."
Scarlett smiled a big smile. She thought, 'Isn't that just like him. To act like we haven't been apart for three months.' She responded, "Good afternoon, Mr. Butler. Please have a seat. I would get up to greet you, but I don't want to disturb my sleeping child."
Rhett sat down and took out a cigar. As he was lighting it, he noticed his hand shook just a little bit. He hoped Scarlett hadn't noticed that. As he looked at Scarlett, she was giving him a disapproving look. That look surged his confidence. Finally, he said, "It is certainly hot here."
"That is why I am on the porch. I am hoping to catch a breeze."
"I have come to take you back to London."
"I'm not going back to London."
"I gave you another ten thousand dollars so you would come back."
"I thank you for the money, but I never agreed to return to London in exchange for the money."
"You know I don't ever do anything without expecting something back."
"I know that about you but we didn't make any kind of deal so you can expect all you want. I will live the rest of my life right here. I sold my soul twice for this piece of land and I am going to appreciate it."
They were quiet for five or ten minutes. Rhett was creating a new strategy in his mind.
Rhett talked about his trip to New York and the business deals he had conducted while he was there. While he was talking, he was trying to figure another plan to get her to come back to him then he would declare his love.
He said, "We should get married."
"Yes, we probably should. Are you asking?"
"Yes."
"Why do you want to marry me? I want to marry you because I love you but why do you want to marry me?"
Rhett nimbly got on his knees before her. He had been planning on spewing a bunch of romantic hogwash and pretending to be joking. Instead, he looked up into the green eyes that he wanted to look into for the rest of his life. He was such a scared, prideful man. Just like Charles Hamilton at that barbeque all those years ago he blurted out, "I love you."
She knew he was scared and frightened. She didn't know why he was, but she knew he was. She wondered for a minute what had happened in his past to make him that way. When the worried look crossed his face, she knew she had made him wait too long for his peace of mind.
"I love you, too. I will gladly marry you. We probably should go do it today at the courthouse."
"I am fine with that." Rhett was glad he didn't have to convince her to get married that very day. He didn't know if just telling Scarlett he loved her was enough to fix his mistake. He wasn't taking any chances. He was not going back to his death bed. Not after having come this far. He quickly got to his feet.
"We don't have time to wait." She stood up and moved Ella to her shoulder. She knew when he saw her baby bump.
Rhett hissed, "You were going to keep my baby a secret from me." Rhett had never known. Nobody had told him. He smiled wryly. Who was there to tell him? Nobody who knew Scarlett would speak to him much less tell him that Scarlett was with child or had a bastard child. It wouldn't be proper for them to talk about that sort of thing. She had cut off all contact with her aunts so they wouldn't know. Even if they had known and had shared it with his mother, his mother would never have told him for his mother would never speak about that kind of thing. Hadn't they done their best to make sure nobody knew they were in London together? What's more if someone had by some leap of logic thought Scarlett's child was his they wouldn't have told him because of who he was. Belle might have told him if he had ever come to Atlanta before she left.
"Yes. I wanted you to marry me because you loved me. Not to get access to my child."
"It's my child too." Rhett knew in that moment that in the other timeline he had at least one child and probably two that he had never known about.
"Yes. And now she will have two parents who love each other and know that they love each other. I had to make sure she was going to have a happy home. I was not going to allow her to be raised in a war zone."
"And I didn't have any say in the matter?" Rhett was tremendously mad. The thought that Scarlett was willing to keep his child from him had infuriated him.
"You had your say when you came to ask me to marry you."
"You knew when we were still in London. You tricked me."
"No more than you tricked me by not using a preventative. You were trying to get me pregnant so you would have an excuse for marrying me then you would not have to admit that you loved me in order to get me to marry you. Rhett, I felt strongly enough about this that I was willing to live with the shame of having an illegitimate child. Not that I would ever be ashamed of her."
Scarlett knew Rhett was madder than she had ever seen him except maybe the night of Ashley's party. She could also tell he was about to say something cruel and mocking. She put her hand over his mouth, and she said, "Don't say it. Once the words are out of your mouth you can never take them back. They will hurt me forever."
She chose that moment to walk into the house. Rhett stood on the porch for a long time. He was madder than he had ever been. He needed to calm down so he could think straight. It hit him then this was the most decisive day of his life. It was the most important day of his life. He had the chance at real love. He had the chance for a happy ever after to his life. He had a chance to stop being a selfish, self-centered, bastard. What had his own mother said about him….. As I look at you now, I see a hard, greedy, unscrupulous man who will do whatever he wants despite who it hurts including himself…. Yes, that had been him. No matter what had happened before or would happen afterwards this day would set the course for the rest of his life. For the last six years in the other timeline, he had just been existing. The only day in that entire six years he had been happy was when he had run into Scarlett at the National Hotel. He had to admit at least to himself, his father was right, he was a stubborn bastard. His mother was right too. He had been willing to hurt himself just to win in the battle he and Scarlett were waging. He smiled sadly. The woman had just wanted the man she loved to declare his love for her. Not an unheard-of request. Not an unreasonable demand. She had just wanted to be married to a man who loved her, too.