Chapter 27.
That next day Sansa still felt sorry for all the drama she had been causing. Sandor waved it off more than once before breakfast, telling her to just never, ever, do that again. It was in the past now.
'The weather is getting better, at least,' she murmured to him, watching him sit before her at the kitchen table. Sandor took a sip from his coffee and nodded, looking at her.
'Maybe good enough to eat outside tonight, little bird. We have some fish to grill in the freezer.' He gave her a wink, before he ate the last piece of bread on his plate.
'I can tend to the chickens, if that is alright with you?' she asked him. She shied her face away, awaiting his answer. She feared he was not letting her out of his sight again, not outside at least and she was afraid of the look she was expecting to see in his eyes.
'Of course, little bird.' The sound of his voice made her look up anyway and she met his eyes. Nothing but warmth there. No anger, worry or judgement. Just like he had really placed everything that happened in the past. It surprised Sansa he had done that, and so easily too.
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Sansa enjoyed the cautious rays of the sun breaking through the clouds. More than once she tilted her face up so that she could feel the warm rays on her skin.
The chickens seemed as happy as ever to see her and frolicked happily around her feet. Feeding them was quite a challenge, as they liked to get in the way most of the time.
Sansa knew Sandor was also working outside, and she saw him pacing past her from time to time. He moved the cows and walked back and forth with logs.
Although he smiled at her now and then, he didn't seem to keep an extra alert eye on her. At first Sansa thought that was a bit strange, because she had expected that he would pay extra attention to her while she was outside. But he kept his words exactly. He had said that everything was forgiven and forgotten and that's how he behaved.
It surprised Sansa quite a bit, but in a good way.
Being outside all morning helped Sansa, and after the days of rain and sitting indoors, she felt free and happy again.
She sat among the chickens and enjoyed their soft feathers and funny antics. They made her laugh more than once. Right until a large shadow fell over her from behind. Sansa quickly turned and looked up in the sunlight.
'They are going to keep you here, if you are being too nice with them, little bird,' Sandor teased her. Sansa could not help but to smile a small smile before he winked once and then sat down beside her himself.
'I think they are very adorable and cute,' Sansa told him, holding a little chick out for him to take in his hands. He gave her a look but could not resist her as she wiggled the little thing in her hands. He brought his hands up and let her place the chick on his palms. The cheeky little thing happily stepped around and almost seemed to feel extra happy, stepping around on Sandor's large hands.
'They are alright.' Sansa giggled as the little chick kept wondering around on Sandor's hands, before Sandor placed the baby bird back on the ground with the other birds.
'You have to admit that they are cute,' Sansa teased him back. Sandor gave her a look, but she saw the amusement in his eyes. The willingness to play with her.
'If someone held a knife to my throat maybe, but I'd say you'd win from them any day of the week, little bird. Any day.' His words made her blush and a little nervous. And she saw he noticed that too.
'My what a color, little bird. Your cheeks are almost matching your nose and forehead. How long have you been looking up in the sun?' He teased her and she knew it. She quickly looked away, not sure how to respond to this playful side of Sandor she so rarely got to see.
She then felt a finger trace the skin of her cheek gently, like she was made out of porcelain. Like she was a treasure to keep. Her heart fluttered a bit, feeling his light touch on her skin. His fingers were warm and large and very, very present, while they made their way down her neck. Sansa shivered in anticipation, not quite sure what this was making her feel.
'You're still nervous around me, are you not?' His deep voice made goosebumps appear on the skin of her arms, even though they were out there, sitting down in the sun.
She dared to look up and met his eyes the same moment his fingers reached her collarbone and lightly traced her there.
'Only when you get like this,' she dared to answer back. He seemed surprised by her words. But not taken aback. He did pull his hand back. She instantly missed the feel of his fingers on her skin. It surprised her too.
'Like what little bird?' he asked her, his eyes following her every move and shiver. Like he was not willing to miss a single thing about her.
'Don't stop,' she spoke softly. He gave her a wicked smile.
'So, you do like my touches then, hmm?' He brought his hand back and gently traced her collarbone, his eyes a little darker now and somehow, they seemed warmer too. Sansa nodded, and closed her eyes for a moment.
'Tell me about what you meant, little bird,' he told her. Sansa opened her eyes and felt how her cheeks kept being red. She knew exactly what he meant, but she decided to make this a longer game. She was starting to enjoy this. Them spending time, talking, touching, exploring.
'What I meant?' she asked him softly, as if she hadn't even a clue what he was referring to. He cocked his head to the side.
'Little minx, tell me,' he teased her, bringing his fingers even lower, now going over the edge of her shirt, almost reaching her breasts.
'Well, if you really want to know, you get more playful, and I like the teasing part.' He opened his eyes to say something but then he closed them again, his fingers moving even lower, but not yet toucher her breast. The look in his eyes told her he was enjoying where this was going, and he was trying to prolong it, not to end it.
'You get more dangerous too, in a good way, I guess.' She watched his eyes turn almost black as she spoke those words and it made her shiver again.
'Well, that are some, brave words, little bird. And I like them. I like them a lot.' He brought his fingers to her face and traced her lower lip.
'And I would love to hear it when you decide you want more than just the teasing part.' He winked at her once and then stared at her lips hungrily. Starving would probably be an even better description, Sansa reckoned.
'Maybe just a little more,' Sansa almost whispered as she watched him move closer, his lips covering hers for a passionate kiss. He moved her on her back in the grass between the chickens and then took his time to kiss her. She wrapper her arms around his strong, broad shoulders and she enjoyed how warm and big he felt under her hands. He brought his hand under her head, letting her head rest on his hands as he gripped her hair to deepen the kiss.
He was the seize of a bear and when he growled into their kiss, Sansa had no hard time picturing him as a grizzly on top of her. A friendly one. A strong one who kept her safe, who cared for her. Who very clearly wanted her badly. She felt him grow hard against her and while that used to scare her away, she wondered what it would be like to have sex with him willingly. Maybe she was almost ready to find out…
He rolled them over, scaring more chickens away, and pulled her on top of him, so she was no longer the one laying in the grass. Right now, he was the one in the grass and on his back. He brought his hands to her cheeks, making her feel completely surrounded by him. There seemed to be nothing more than them in this moment. Sansa did not even hear the chickens anymore. All she could see, hear and smell, was him. That strong man beneath her. Smelling like a lovely summer day, like nature and so much more. The man who instantly had come after her when he discovered she was gone.
'What exactly is going on in that pretty head of yours right now?' Sandor asked her, kissing the corner of her lips and adjusting their legs, so hers fell between his now.
Sansa swallowed. This moment felt so alien and yet so familiar, because it was with him. She bit her lip and felt him pull her lip from between her teeth with his thumb.
'Tell me,' he murmured, kissing her once more.
Sansa took a shaky breath.
'I am thinking that…. That I might like this.' She saw the way his eyes lit up at her words. She saw the happiness in them, the longing he felt for her.
'And?' he asked, feeling she was not quite finished speaking, but needed a little push to go on. She smiled down on him.
'And I wonder what more there is. If it can get better without being scary.' He nodded at her, the glee still in his eyes. His hands found hers and brought them between them, on his chest.
'Aye little bird, there is so much more. More that I would love to show you. To make you feel. And we'd stop if it got too scary.' She swallowed and bit her lip once more. Making him chuckle.
'The question is, my beautiful bird, are you ready to find out?' His eyes shone brighter than she had seen them before and the feeling in her stomach grew stronger with every second.
She knew exactly what he was talking about and the biggest part of her was ready and wanted to find out. Maybe it was right, maybe she was ready now. She had long lost the illusion that she would find prince charming, marry him and then loose her virginity on her wedding night. It was not even what she wanted anymore, she wanted to be the one in charge. The one who would determine if she was ready to go all the way. And right now, right here he was giving her that choice.
'I- I might be.' Her answer said a lot more than the "maybe" she was using, and she saw in his eyes he felt that too, but he was being patient, once more.
'You need to be sure, little bird. There's no going back from this.' Sansa nodded, she knew that.
'Who says A has to be ready to say B, right?' she teased him, but he shook his head at her words.
'No Sansa, you get to say A and stop if you want. We have all the time in the world to finish the damn alphabet.' She giggled at his words and then laid her head on his chest, listening to his heart.
'Thank you, Sandor,' she spoke. When he replied she was surprised he had even heard her soft words.
'Anything for you Sansa.' She felt him kiss the top of her head, before she brought her head back up to look down on him.
'I'm ready Sandor, but… I'd rather not be outside…' Before she could finish that sentence, she was up and in the air, Sandor's strong arms beneath her shoulder and legs, carrying her in the direction on the house.
'Let's find out how far into that alphabet we can go, little bird.'