Hey guys!
In this chapter, we are finally all on the same page (pretty much). Everything that happens in this chapter is happening at relatively the same time.
I promised a surprise in the notes for the last chapter and this chapter has that. It's not a very big surprise so I hope I didn't get your hopes up for nothing lol.
Anyway, I hope you like this. I wasn't sure about this one but I couldn't keep going over it anymore. I just needed to post it.
Carol blinked her eyes open groggily. She squinted as the bright sun seeping in through the tent hit her eyes. She dropped her head down again to avoid the light and her face landed on the warm, familiar body lying beneath her. She hummed to herself as she listened to Daryl's quiet snores and took in his comforting scent.
Despite their complaints about the lack of showers last night, Carol had never had a problem with Daryl's sometimes questionable personal hygiene. To her, he never smelled like anything other than Daryl. Dirt—and a touch of sweat—was just a part of that. He had gotten better at taking care of himself as the years went by but she never minded when he didn't exactly smell like roses. It made him seem more real to her.
A large grin stretched across her face as she remembered last night. He had told her he loved her and they had kissed. They had kissed a lot. And afterwards, when she had had her breakdown—a breakdown she still felt embarrassed about—he had comforted her and told her she was beautiful, along with revealing secrets she never would have guessed.
Leah had been a point of discomfort and insecurity for her for a long time. Ever since he had told her about the woman, she had tried to figure out what this 'Leah' had given him that she couldn't. She had known at the time that she'd had no right to feel that way. She had been married after all. It still had festered away in her when she would go to sleep at night next to Ezekiel.
It felt like a distant memory now. Daryl had told her that Leah had not meant all that much to him at all. At most, Carol could safely say the woman had probably been a good friend—with some benefits involved, obviously—but love had had no place in their relationship.
She could still remember how giddy she had felt when he had revealed that it was only Leah's seeming resemblance to her—whether that be physical characteristics or personality traits, she didn't know—that made him pursue a relationship with the woman in the first place.
A small part of Carol felt a little bad for the woman she didn't know. It must have been hard to know that the man you were with was holding back from you. The larger, more selfish part of her was overjoyed that Leah had been unable to win Daryl over as she had clearly attempted to.
"Mornin'," she heard as his voice rumbled beneath her head.
Bracing herself for the sun, she lifted herself up so she could look down at him. His blue eyes were cracked open just barely—undoubtedly just as bothered by the sun as she had been—and there was a sleepy smile on his mouth that was more adorable than it had any right to be on a man of his age.
"Morning," she said with a smile. Unable to help herself, she ducked down and pecked him on the lips before settling back to look at him again. He blinked, seeming surprised by the move but his smile grew wider.
"That how you're gonna wake me up from now on?"
"Do you want me to?" she asked with a smirk.
"Ain't gonna hear no complaints from me," he replied with his own smirk.
She giggled, unable to believe how happy she felt in this moment. She knew there were things they needed to worry about but right now, they seemed unimportant. She stared down at him, content to just watch him with the knowledge that he was hers and she was his now. He shifted underneath her though with a look of discomfort.
"You okay?" she asked with a raised brow. She knew she wasn't that heavy and he had never complained about her weight on top of him before. He huffed a small laugh.
"Fine but you're crushin' my bladder right now and I gotta piss…" he said, trailing off. She snorted and climbed off of him, getting to her feet. He let out a soft groan as she moved but she could see the relief on his face as the pressure of her body disappeared.
Carol busied herself with grabbing a bottle of water. Her throat—as always—was dry as a bone in the mornings. She took a drink and sighed in satisfaction as her throat no long felt like sandpaper. She was about to go sit down to wait for Daryl to return but she found herself being pulled into a hard body. She gasped and braced her hands on Daryl's chest. She looked up at him with curiosity.
There was a look of barely concealed want in his eyes. She shivered under the weight of it. That look was one she certainly could get used to. It made her feel the need to press her thighs together. She refrained from doing so. That would only give her away and she knew neither of them were ready to delve further into the intimacy of their relationship yet.
"Daryl?" she asked, licking her lips to combat the sudden dryness. She watched as Daryl's eyes followed the motion. He chewed his lip before he met her gaze again. That desire that had been prevalent in his eyes became diluted with a touch of familiar shyness.
"Can… Can I kiss you?" he asked.
She smiled up at him. This was what set him apart from any other man she had been involved with. Even though he clearly wanted her, he didn't just take what he wanted. He respected and cared about her enough to consider her feelings.
"I told you that you can kiss me whenever you want," she reminded him. His cheeks flushed.
"I know," he replied. "Just… I don't know… Felt like I should ask."
She shook her head at him good naturedly. He was such a sweetheart. No one would ever think it at first glance and she admittedly had been the same. She had assumed he was just like his brother, rough and crass. She had learned quickly how wrong she was. She brought her hands up and cupped his face. He peered at her through his sleep mussed hair.
"You can ask me as much as you want but I can pretty much guarantee that my answer will always be yes."
His lips lifted at that in an incredibly cute half-smile.
"So, I can?" he asked and this time she knew he was teasing. There was a glint of humour in his eyes. She scoffed and shook her head again but leaned in and pressed her mouth to his.
She let the kiss linger for a long moment but kept it ultimately chaste. She didn't want to push things too far when he had said he wanted to go slow. There was also a matter that just occurred to her. She pulled away to meet his eyes again with a frown.
"I thought you needed to pee," she pointed out. He let out a little laugh and took a step away from her.
"I do," he agreed. "Just didn't want to go without gettin' to kiss you."
Carol could have reminded him again that he didn't need to worry about being able to kiss her. She knew it was his insecurity that was telling him that he needed to steal as many kisses as he could before she told him he couldn't kiss her anymore. She knew this because she had experienced the same kind of insecurity many times in her life. Plus, she knew Daryl almost as well as she knew herself. So, she didn't call attention to it. She just resolved to help quash those doubts as much as she could. As a first step, she pecked his lips again and gave him a gentle shove in the direction of the tent entrance.
"Go," she ordered. "When you get back we can talk about what the hell we're going to do about that herd."
Daryl moved towards the entrance but he paused at the flap obscuring the outside world.
"I'll go grab us some breakfast too," he said as he looked back at her. "Ain't gonna be able to plan shit on an empty stomach."
Carol smiled and nodded. She had admittedly forgotten that food was something that existed until the moment he mentioned it. She had been so caught up in him. Now her stomach made an embarrassing rumble. Daryl heard it too, of course. He chuckled.
"Looks like you agree," he pointed out. She snorted and sent a shooing motion his way.
"Just get out of here before you piss yourself."
His rumbling laugh accompanied him as he left the tent to go relieve himself and get them some food. Her face ached from the smile that appeared on it. She hadn't thought it possible that she could love him any more than she already did but she found that she was wrong. Last night—and this morning—had intensified everything.
For the first time in years, she felt excited about what the future could hold for them.
Daryl felt relieved as soon as the sunlight started breaking through the curtains. Being trapped inside this building was making him antsy. He had already watched most of the herd amble away. Part of him had been tempted to wake the group straight away so they could leave but they had been so dead on their feet. He figured they needed the rest. Now though, he felt it was an appropriate time. He set about waking each of them and they had all clambered to their feet groggily.
Merle had been—unsurprisingly—a pain. He was never a morning person and he had apparently woken up on the wrong side of the bed today. He had an almost permanent scowl the whole time they were readying to leave. He had even snatched a bag of chips from T Dog's hands and glared at the man as if asking him to fight him for it. T Dog had just shrugged it off and grabbed another bag for himself.
"Alright," Rick said, getting down to business. "We'll go out but we go slow and we all be careful. Their numbers may have dropped off but we know how easy it is for them to grow again."
Everyone nodded their acceptance, even Merle. They opened the doors carefully and stepped out, Rick at the head. They followed him into the street and took out the remaining walkers relatively easily. There hadn't been that many left hanging around.
Wordlessly, Rick led the way back into the city. They still needed to find fuel and some tape to plug the leak in the truck. He hoped Rick knew where the hell they were going. He sure seemed to with the way he barely paused in his trek.
The further they went, the deeper Daryl's frown became. If he didn't know any better, he would assume they were headed back to the nursing home. They were almost perfectly retracing the path they took. Why the hell would they be returning there, though? Did Rick think those guys would be able to offer fuel? Daryl had gotten the impression that they didn't have all too much in the way of supplies.
"Rick," he hissed in a whisper, mindful of any lurking walkers, as they paused at a street corner. Rick turned to him questioningly.
"The hell're we doin'?" he asked gruffly. "Why're we goin' back?"
Daryl spotted similar looks of curiosity on T Dog and Glenn's faces as they waited for Rick to explain. Merle just looked bored, leaning against the side of the building and picking at the bandage around his wrist.
"I didn't pay it much attention at the time, but it came to me last night before I went to sleep," Rick said. "It was a tiny glimpse, but I spotted a gas station across the way from their compound."
A flash of recognition hit Daryl. Rick was right. There had been a gas station. It hadn't seemed important when they had been there earlier. They'd had a full tank of gas and had not expected the truck to crap out on them. Now, there was a chance this place could be the solution to their problems.
"You think there'll be any gas left?" Daryl asked sceptically. If people had been siphoning gas all over the city, surely they would have hit up the gas stations first. It was a long shot to assume that this place would even have anything to offer. He watched Rick sigh.
"Maybe not, but there's a chance."
Daryl could understand Rick's frustration. The man wanted desperately to get back to his wife and kid and they kept coming upon obstacle after obstacle. If anything, Daryl was impressed the man was managing to keep his cool so well. If Daryl were more invested in the situation, he knew he wouldn't be able to say the same. When Daryl got antsy, he lashed out and got mean. It wasn't something he was proud of but it was just the way he was.
"Alright," Daryl replied, knowing that pointing out the—likely—uselessness of this mission would be counterproductive. "Let's go then."
Rick looked relieved by his support and gave him a nod. Daryl ignored Merle's heavy gaze boring into him. He knew his brother wasn't happy that Daryl was getting along with 'Officer Friendly'. Daryl didn't give a shit. So far, Rick had done alright by him and until that changed, he'd support the ex-cop.
After checking that the coast was clear, the group started moving again.
Carol had occupied herself with her book while she waited for Daryl to return. It wasn't that good but it helped pass the time. The cheesy romance that could usually ignite passion in her fell short now though. She had something real now and that real thing was better—in the short time it had existed—than anything she had had before.
She knew why. She had never loved any man in the way that she loved Daryl. Had never felt close to another person the way she felt close to him. She had never believed in soul mates before the world ended but he made her believe in such a foolish notion.
The validation and reciprocation of her feelings had caused a fire to ignite inside her. That fire had been extinguished many times over the years and this last time—with Henry—she had thought that would be it. She would be stuck in her numbness for the rest of her life. She was pleased to find she had been wrong.
A small measure of time passed and it startled Carol to realise she had been humming. She never hummed. Well, she used to. Back when she hadn't been beaten down over and over by the world. In the prison, she would walk the halls, humming quietly to herself—sometimes with Judith bundled in her arms. It had been a simple pleasure she had enjoyed at the time.
Did that mean she was lifting from her pit of despair? It wouldn't surprise her to find that all it had taken was Daryl loving her to make her feel more like herself. Well, more like the person she used to be. The person she believed she had always meant to be.
She was startled from her introspection by the sound of the material of the tent. She looked up and watched as Daryl entered, carrying a plate. He gave her a smile in greeting and of course, she returned it with a ridiculously wide smile of her own. She was probably going to cause herself an injury from all this smiling.
She dumped her book down and dragged the other plastic crate over. He took a seat beside her and offered her the plate wordlessly. She glanced at it and saw it was a simple breakfast of scrambled eggs. The plate was heaped much fuller than she knew the others in the camp's plates would be. There were even two forks on the sides. She grabbed one.
"You wanna talk while we eat or wait?" Daryl asked as he grabbed up the other fork. He shook his hair back from his face as he looked at her, waiting for her answer.
"We can talk while we eat," she decided. They needed to make sure they knew what to do when that herd showed up. The safety of knowing what happened already had waned with the knowledge that things were changing.
"Saw Andrea and Amy coming back with fish," Daryl said through a mouthful of food, starting the discussion. "It's happening tonight."
Carol nodded as she chewed. The memory of Amy's death came back to her then. It had been awful. The poor girl had been so young and it had destroyed Andrea. She hoped they could change it this time. There were people who deserved to die in this world and Amy was definitely not one of them.
"What do you think we should do?" Carol asked.
"We get Carol and Sophia to stay up on the RV," he said. "They won't take much convincin'. You stay close by and when the herd hits, you join me in pickin' 'em off. Way I remember it, there weren't that many. We should be able to do it easy. And, of course, we protect anyone that's in danger while we do it."
Carol nodded. That sounded like a good enough plan to her and it matched with her own ideas for the most part.
"I'll wait out by the RV," she told him. "Amy got bitten there. I'll take care of that walker and then come help."
"Alright," he agreed. "Other me and the group that went to Atlanta should show up anyway and have all those guns."
Carol bit her lip as she pushed the food with her fork. That was what happened last time but would it happen again? At this point, it was impossible to predict. Time seemed to be playing with them. It was ridiculous to consider but it was like time knew what they were trying to do and was not happy about it.
"Maybe," she said, her appetite waning as the possibility of failure crept up on her. There were so many people in this camp that deserved to live—all of them really, except for Ed—and it hurt something in her—something that she didn't think existed anymore—to think they could die.
"It don't matter if they don't," Daryl said, cutting through her rapidly deteriorating hope. "We've faced bigger herds before. We could do it easily with just the two of us."
Carol nodded. She knew he was right. The walkers that were going to attack the camp tonight were nothing compared to what they had faced in the future. Still, the worry inside her wouldn't abate. She jumped a bit when she felt a warm hand on her face. She turned her head and met Daryl's gaze. There was a look of concern in his eyes.
"You okay?" he asked in a soft tone she had only ever heard him use with her or the kids. The significance of that should have occurred to her before but it hadn't. She took a deep breath and blew it out slowly.
"I'm okay," she told him, giving him a shaky smile. She leaned her cheek into his palm, enjoying the way his calloused skin felt against her. "I'm just so afraid this is all going to go wrong. Knowing the future seemed like it was going to be all the advantage we'd need, but now? Now, it feels like anything could happen."
She didn't mention that inside she was reeling at the fact that she was worried at all. It had been a long time since she had actively cared about people who weren't close to her personally. She hadn't let herself feel that concern because she had known it would just hurt when the worst happened. But here she was. Worried about people who had been only acquaintances in this camp. It was like she had finally woken up after all these years. She stifled a laugh as she realised that she could compare herself to Sleeping Beauty. She was sure it was Daryl's love that had brought her back to life but there had been plenty of kisses involved.
"You're right," Daryl replied thoughtfully. He dropped his hand from her face and took one of hers in it. "We don't know everything that's gonna happen. Don't mean it's gonna go bad. Can mean good things too. I mean, it ain't like we thought we'd be here," he pointed out with a glance to their clasped hands.
Carol studied their hands and took in their contrasting skin tones. His made hers seem so pale in comparison. She admired his tattoos, glancing at each of them lovingly. The skull and crosses that Judith had designed and the little star that she knew Daryl had gotten to pay tribute to his mother. She smiled.
"How can you be so optimistic after everything that's happened?" she asked, keeping her smile in place as she looked at him, letting him know it wasn't an accusation. His words and his sweet actions had already managed to settle her a little.
"I don't know," he said with a shrug. "Never used to be. Spent a long time thinkin' everythin' was shit. Every time though, there was one thing that could make everythin' better. Could make me smile even on the shittiest day."
"What was that?" she asked. Some part of her knew what he was getting at but the remaining broken parts inside of her still struggled to accept that she could bring happiness to anyone.
"You," Daryl said, confirming what she hadn't allowed herself to believe. "You give me hope, Carol. No matter how bad things get, if you're there, I can always get through it. And if you're not there, thinking about you and all the shit you've overcome is motivation enough."
Carol blinked at the tears that pricked behind her eyes. She didn't want to cry anymore—not after last night—but it was difficult. The sweetness of his words was overwhelming. It made her heart feel too big in her chest. Not knowing what else to do, she leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his lips, trying to convey her appreciation of what he had said. He kissed her back without protest and she could swear she felt him smiling against her.
"So, that's why I have faith in things going well tonight," Daryl said when they broke apart. "'Cause I know you'll be right there with me."
All Carol could do was grin at him with a blush staining her cheeks.
Their little group continued to hurry through the streets but as they neared the gas station, Daryl's ears pricked up. There was a flurry of gunfire in the air. A quick look at the others assured him that they had reached the same conclusion he had: It was coming from the compound that housed the Vatos gang and their charges.
There had been a moment of indecision before Rick led them in the direction of the compound. Along the way, he handed out guns to each of them, even Merle. His brother had given Rick a shocked look before accepting the shotgun.
As they ran, Daryl observed his brother curiously. This would have been a perfect opportunity for Merle to get his revenge on Rick and T Dog. He was finally armed and the others were distracted. As it was, his brother didn't seem inclined to carry out his revenge. He just ran with the rest of them, determination in his gaze. Daryl didn't know what to make of it just yet, so he focused on the gunfire up ahead.
Reaching the compound, they spotted two trucks parked out the front. They were new model, four door work trucks. There were a number of gas cans in the beds of the trucks—apparently, they had found the people who had siphoned all the fuel.
Daryl watched Rick look at the gas cans hungrily. He could read easily what Rick was thinking in that moment. They could take those cans and have plenty of fuel to power their trip home. Rick had been trying to get home for the last two days and the solution was right in front of him. He waited for Rick to give the order to load up the cans.
Another peal of gunfire occurred though and it seemed to snap Rick out of it. He whirled around towards the compound with that hero look in his eyes again. Daryl was impressed by the sight of it. Anyone else would have selfishly taken that gas and got out of there, thinking the fight wasn't their problem. Not Rick Grimes.
The ex-cop led the way towards the building, reminding them needlessly to be careful as they entered. They crept along in the shadows, following the sound of the gunfire. As they moved, shouts and screams became audible too. Daryl's stomach twisted as he thought of all those helpless old folks. They didn't deserve to die like this.
Entering the room that they had first encountered the group in, they came upon the skirmish. There were six guys firing at the recognisable Vatos. They were returning the gunfire but it was clear they were overwhelmed. There were only four of them in the fray too, so they were outnumbered.
Rick was the first to move, using his shotgun to take out one of the men. Following his lead, Daryl sent a bolt into the head of one of the others. He experienced a momentary shock at taking a human life but quickly pushed it away. These guys were bad news and if they were left alive, they would only target other vulnerable people.
Merle, T Dog and Glenn joined in the shootout and took down three of the men. The last man was taken out by one of the Vatos and the compound became silent once more. Daryl lowered his bow and, for the first time, took in the carnage.
There were bodies of old men and women, along with some of the guys they had spoken to earlier. They had clearly been unprepared for such an attack even with the guns Rick had given them. Daryl spotted two bodies that didn't seem to belong and gathered that the raiding party had in fact been a group of eight.
Guillermo appeared then, looking exhausted but appreciative. He moved over to Rick and shook his hand, thanking him. He explained that the group had shown up and tried to get them hand over their supplies. They hadn't agreed and thus the fight had broken out. Daryl tuned out the rest of the tale as he caught sight of his brother.
Merle was standing over one of the bodies with an odd look on his face. Daryl approached him with a frown. He glanced down at the body and sighed inwardly. It was the woman who had tended to Merle's wrist. Mrs Reynolds. There was a gaping wound in her chest and her once crisp white shirt was now stained crimson.
"Ain't right," Merle said in a barely recognisable tone. "She was a nice lady."
Daryl swallowed at the show of emotion from his brother. It was a rare thing to see even after all the years they had spent together.
"I'm sure she was," Daryl agreed. He hadn't gotten to speak with her as much as Merle had but she had seemed sweet enough, if not a little addled. Merle still stared down at the body of the old woman as if he were waiting for her to wake and give him that kind smile again.
"Come on," Daryl said, reaching a hand out to clasp his brother's shoulder. As angry as he had been with Merle, he hated seeing him this way. It made something twist inside him and he didn't like it. Merle turned outraged and slightly tearful eyes on him.
"Ain't right," he repeated gruffly.
"Know it ain't, Merle," Daryl replied. "Ain't nothin' we can do now though. She's gone."
Merle glanced at the woman one last time before nodding. He looked around the room and his eyes seemed to settle on something. He walked determinedly in that direction before returning with something in his grasp. A blanket, Daryl realised. He watched as his brother unfolded the blanket and settled it gently over the body.
"You rest up well in heaven for me, sweetheart," Merle murmured quietly. "Pro'ly won't get there to see you when it's my time, but I hope you find some peace fer yourself."
Daryl swallowed at the lump in his throat. It was a strangely touching scene to witness and one he never would have expected from his brother. Merle lifted himself to his feet once more and the raw emotion that was on display was quickly shuttered away behind a hard expression that Daryl was more familiar with.
"Come on," Daryl said again, indicating with his head for them to rejoin Rick and the others. Merle didn't reply but he fell into step beside him easily.
"How come you guys came back?" he heard someone ask as he and Merle approached. It was Felipe. He had a bullet wound in his shoulder but he was giving a good show of not caring about it.
"Truck crapped out on us," Daryl replied. "Was gonna check out that gas station when we heard the gunfire."
"Sorry to say, but that gas station's been dry for months," Guillermo told them. "We tried it too once but it was tapped out."
Rick sighed, his irritation with their continued shitty luck apparent. The ex-cop opened and closed his fists and he shifted his weight.
"We need to get back to our camp," he said in a tired voice. "My… My wife and my son are there. I... I need to get back to them."
Daryl frowned as he remembered the trucks out front again. They hadn't examined them that closely when they got here but they seemed in good shape. He didn't know why the solution hadn't occurred to him immediately. The fight had distracted him, he guessed.
"Rick," he said, causing their leader to turn to him with a questioning look. "We can take those assholes' trucks. Be a lot quicker than doubling back for the box truck."
Recognition sparked in Rick's eyes. He pressed a hand to his forehead before chuckling quietly. Apparently, he was experiencing the same disbelief that Daryl had at their slow realisation.
"Right, of course," he muttered to himself. He lowered his hand and looked back to Guillermo and the other guys. There was a determined look on his face now.
"You all are more than welcome to come with us," Rick invited. "You're not safe here in the city, that much is clear. I can't guarantee you'll be safe with us at the quarry but you might have better chances."
Daryl shifted a little at the offer Rick made. The camp was pretty secure and they had plenty of resources around but it wouldn't last forever. At some point, they would have to move on and adding more people to the group was a risky decision. He didn't try to question it though. Rick meant well.
"I appreciate the offer but I have to decline," Guillermo replied with a smile and a shrug. "Some of these folks won't make the journey and I can't leave any of them behind."
"I understand," Rick replied.
"Well, seems like it would be stupid to offer for you to rest up here. I know you want to get going," Guillermo said next. "But that offer you made goes both ways, brother. You ever need to, you guys can come back. You and you're people. We'll take you in."
Rick thanked him for the offer before leading the way from the compound again. They examined the trucks and found them in great condition with almost full tanks. Rick, Glenn and T Dog piled into one while he and Merle took the other.
Earlier, when Daryl had been pissed, he probably would have left Merle to drive alone and would have gotten in the truck with Rick, Glenn and T Dog. After the show with that old woman, Daryl found himself softening a little towards his brother.
Time would tell how long that would last though.
Hope you liked this.
The surprise was the rescue of the Vatos, of course. I didn't like what happened to them in the show, so I decided to write my own little change. Obviously, we don't know how long after the group left them that they were attacked but in my version, it wasn't very long. I don't know if I'll be bringing back the group later or not. We'll see. The option is there though.
I hope the part with Merle wasn't too cheesy. I just wanted to show that there is some depth to him and he's not just a meth head. We saw that in S3 but I wanted to start introducing it sooner.
Also, I realised that I completely forgot to put a warning in the other chapter for Merle's racist language. I'm sorry if anyone got offended by it. I'm going to go back and put the warning in but I can't believe I forgot. Side note: It felt totally weird and wrong writing it but I knew it was in character for Merle (at least Merle at that time). I hope you can forgive my forgetfulness.