The Long Game

Part 27

Author's Note: Continued from where we last left off.

Chapter inspired by the song Believe by Mumford and Sons.

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Don looked out onto the street below their hotel room and noted the mass of bikes that seemed to be intricately roped to each other and poles on the corner of the street. He was just thinking that not enough Americans rode bikes for their commute when Liz walked in the room.

"I made us reservations downstairs for eight tonight, he should meet us there" Liz said as she walked up next to him. "Wow, that's a lot of bikes."

"I should start riding to work," Don said absently.

"In your suit?" Liz asked him.

"I guess I'd have to leave one at the office," Don said.

Liz looked at him. He had been saying odd things like that a lot lately, it was as if rehab made him more philosophic or contemplative about the little things in life he had missed in the past.

"Then you should," she said as she touched his arm. He kept looking at the bikes and Liz walked over to the sofa to sit down.

"You ever think maybe we just go too fast?" Don asked. "Like there's a better pace?"

Liz sighed. It was going to be one of those conversations.

"Are you talking about the cases lately? I mean, a lot has happened in a short period, you and Samar were almost hanged, you and I were kidnapped, let's see we've been on planes to Alaska, Poland, France, Uzbekistan….and that's just, what the last two months?" Liz said with a chuckle.

Don nodded.

"I'm just thinking I need to slow down," Don said quietly.

"Like leave the Bureau?" Liz asked.

"I'm not sure," Don said. "Probably not."

"Leave the task force?" Liz asked, her heart lodging in her throat.

He didn't answer for a while and then turned to look at her.

"Maybe part of the reason I needed to get high was the adrenaline rush I am used to in my job," Don said thoughtfully as she leaned his hips back against the window ledge. "Maybe I don't know how to come down?"

"Wasn't hunting Reddington a rush?" Liz asked, probing.

"It was," Don said.

"Then how is this any different?" Liz asked.

"I guess not, from an outside perspective," Don said as he crossed his arms over his chest. "But I'm starting to think that continuing to place my life in danger, to see yours in danger, may be messing with me more than…"

"Wait, my life in danger messes with you?" Liz asked.

He furrowed his brow.

"How could it not?" He asked her, surprised by her question.

Liz looked at him mildly surprised.

"Remember when you said life without out me would be terrifying?" Don asked her.

Liz nodded.

"Ditto," Don said as he met her eyes.

Liz rose from her seat and pulled him against her and hugged him tight.

"I'm not going anywhere," she said into his ear.

Don held onto her tight. He wasn't sure that was true.

"Don, you need to do whatever is best for you," Liz said softly as she smelled his aftershave. "And I'm going to support you in whatever that is."

She felt him nod against her and release a breath relacing. She suddenly realized that this was a conversation that he was nervous about having with her, it wasn't just a passing thought but something that had been sitting with him.

Liz pulled back and looked into his eyes.

"I'm not going to lie and say that I'm not going to miss you, or that safety I feel when I know you have my back," Liz said honestly. "But we'll figure it out."

Don nodded. "I haven't decided, I'm…I'm not deciding right now. It's just a thought. I think I just like knowing the good guys from the bad and that if I was to get hurt or die, it was for a good reason and not to support Reddington making more money or getting more contacts."

Liz nodded. She absolutely understood where he was coming from. She also understood that their relationship, whatever it was, was complicating his life in a way he may not need right now. She wasn't sure what that meant, but she had sensed he was both moving toward her and away from her at the same time lately.

"I better go get showered and cleaned up," Liz said. "Apparently Reddington is sending clothes up for us."

"Ours aren't good enough?" Don asked, insulted.

"Apparently not," Liz chuckled as she shut the washroom door.

Don heard the shower come on a couple of minutes later and looked at their two bags sitting side by side next to the bed. Lyle had introduced an idea in their last session that the more he got used to pretending as part of his undercover work, the more skilled he became at lying in other aspects of his life. That undercover was becoming great practice for covering up other things. Like his love for Liz, or his drug habit, or his seething dislike for Reddington, or his loneliness. And, truthfully, he had a point. It was hard to turn off, the lies. It was getting harder to tell where the lines were with Liz, what was pretend and what was real, what was something a friend would do or say, and what implied they were beyond friends.

He kept going back to one fact: She was still in love with Tom. Her face told him that when he saw the two of them together, despite her hostility toward the man, she still looked at him a certain way. A way Don wasn't sure she looked at him. And that was hard to swallow. She had a history with the man, was married to him, loved him completely…did he have anything close to that with her? Forgetting the lies, the manipulation, the…everything, her heart still beat for Tom. Don could not let that go. Maybe he took up a chunk of her heart, maybe he even was someone that made her heart skip a beat, but was he even close to what Tom was to her?

She had said how important he was to her, they had done very intimate things, she had been dating him lately, but Don wasn't sure what that meant. Was the dating because she felt he needed the support? He didn't want to admit it, but he sensed that was the case. Were the things she said to him, things to support and bolster him, or were they real? And besides the odd hug or lean in, their relationship had become incredibly platonic. That had to say something.

Don sensed that if he had to keep guessing what she wanted, or what she needed, he would spend the rest of his life spinning his wheels and know no more years from now then he did in this moment. He just wanted her to say it. Then he would know, and he could move forward with or without her. He hoped with, but with Tom back in the picture, lurking, he wasn't sure. He also sensed, with her lack of interest in leaving the task force, any job movement would just be him and she would stay in danger with the task force.

There was a knock on the door and Don was pulled from his reverie and went to answer it. A man handed him a wooden hanger with a clothing bag and a box and walked away.

"Thank you," Don said to the man's back.

He walked into their room with their clothing bag and laid it carefully on the bed and unzipped it. There was a slinky black dress for Liz that left little to the imagination and a beautiful suit and shirt for him that looked like it was hand-stictched…..

"Wow, Red, you don't do anything cheap," Don said as he flipped open the lid to the box and found some wicked green high heels for Liz that looked like a lizard. "Zanotti?"

He picked up one of the men's shoes nestled against one of the heels. "Feragamo."

He knew these clothes were probably several months of their combined salaries.

Don heard the shower turn off and took Liz's dress and carefully hung it in the closet followed by his suit and tie. She came out of the washroom in a towel and her hair up in another one. He should have just appreciated the view, but all he could think of was how often Tom probably took a moment like this for granted.

"Shoes?" Liz asked.

"Yours look like a snake," Don said as he pulled one out. "Mine look like a month's salary."

Liz chuckled at his assessment of the expensive items.

"Let me guess, dress with spaghetti straps?" Liz asked as she walked toward the closet.

"Yeah, how did you…?"

"Every man thinks they look nice on a woman and every woman knows she can't wear a proper bra with them, so she spends all night trying to keep her boobs from jostling out of the dress or hiking up her strapless bra," Liz sighed as she pulled the dress from the closet and looked at the low V-back and knew a bra was going to be impossible.

"I hadn't thought about that," Don said, honestly.

"No man ever does," Liz sighed.

"You could just wear something that you have," Don offered.

"I'll be fine," Liz sighed again.

Don dropped her shoe back in the box and there was another knock at the door.

"Who is it?" Don called.

"Who else knows you are here?" Reddington answered.

Don sighed and Liz left his side to go back in the washroom and out of sight.

Don walked to the door and opened it to see Red and Dembe on the other side.

Reddington walked past him into the room and looked around for Liz.

"She's just had a shower," Don supplied.

"Oh, well then," Reddington said as he produced a box from his pocket. "Your wedding rings."

"How did you get them?" Don asked.

"I didn't," Reddington said.

"I saw hers was a band of diamonds and yours was a simple gold band, so I just purchased similar ones," Reddington said.

"Oh, thanks," Don smiled at him as he took the box. "We didn't have them with us because we haven't…"

"Yes, I assumed that," Reddington said as he looked toward the washroom again.

"She's getting ready," Don offered just before the door opened and Liz came out in her jeans and t-shirt with her hair in a towel.

"Thanks for the clothes," Liz said kindly.

"I gave Hans your approximate measurements, for both of you, so hopefully it all fits," Reddington said with a smile.

"How do you know our measurements?" Don asked.

"A keen eye for fashion and basic anatomy, Donald," Reddington said. "Your pant legs have been too wide for years and your jackets too loose through the back."

Don cleared his throat.

"And I also need to inform you that I'm leaving, I have some business to attend to," Reddington said. "I trust you can take flights home with the masses?"

Don chuckled. "We'll survive in coach."

Reddington nodded. "Well, enjoy tonight and I will see you when you get back with a new case, if all goes well."

Don and Liz nodded and watched him and Dembe leave.

"Mrs. Hughes," Don said as he took out the diamond band and placed it on her finger.

Liz smiled up at him and before his fingers could grasp his own band to put it on himself, she grabbed it.

"Mr. Hughes," Liz said as she placed the band on his ring finger.

Don looked at her surprised by the romantic gesture.

Liz leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips, it was the first time since San Juan, and Don was caught by surprise. It was over before the kiss registered with his brain, and she was turning to go back into the washroom to get ready.

The door closed and Don looked down at the band and closed his eyes.

"For better or for worse," he whispered to himself.

To be continued…