Chapter 27: Dream Rune, Part 3: Tromsø

Dagmar was just as shell-shocked. She asked Hildegard in the morning where Bjorn was, and Hildegard told her he would be home soon enough. Wearing some of Magnus' clothes and shaking from head to toe, Hildegard made her first ever visit to a modern city.

She was so out of her element. Hildegard persevered long enough to learn that Magnus had disappeared from Trondheim. It was with extreme difficulty she told Chelone to go north.

"You're not giving up," Lys reassured her. "You'll find him. But you need to make sure nobody finds you if he tells anyone."

"I know." Hildegard's face was so raw she looked like she hadn't stopped crying in weeks. Maybe she hadn't. "What if he hurts Bjorn? Bjorn must be so scared. He must be wondering where I am and how I could let this happen."

Lys rubbed Hildegard's back, but what could honestly lessen that kind of pain? They stood on the beach again on a different day. Hildegard had a bag on her shoulders and Dagmar in her arms.

"When'll you be back?" Lys asked.

"I'm not sure, but I'll never find Bjorn from here." Hildegard's sigh was shaky. "I won't come back until I have him, though. I can't."

The two of them shared a tight hug, and Dagmar started to cry as realization hit her that this was a goodbye. She didn't make this any easier for Hildegard, but she tried to remain strong as she and Dagmar apparated to the mainland.

They were in a different city—Tromsø, Narcissa deduced. Hildegard found the wizarding district hidden by a heavily-forested park. Even though Hildegard wore some of Magnus' clothing to hide her runes, she blended in well enough. She led Dagmar along by the hand.

"Hallo," a woman about Hildegard's age greeted her when she came up to the counter in an inn. "What can I do for you?"

"I need help, actually." Hildegard was nervous enough without the fact her Norwegian wasn't very strong. "Erm, I don't really know how to explain this. I just left my husband and I don't have any money. I don't have anywhere to go. Is there anything here in town to help me get on my feet?"

The woman blinked, her gaze dropping to Dagmar. Dagmar turned her face into Hildegard's leg. The woman softened.

"Erm, this is about the closest thing to a shelter," she replied. "Unfortunately, I don't know of any places that do lodging for free. We have a notice board over there if you want to try your luck with any of the people looking for roommates. There are a lot of generous folks here. Small community, and all. If you're looking to get on your feet, I bet any of them would be willing to help. I could get you that far, at least! I know the people, I could tell you a bit about them."

The woman introduced herself then as Bodil. She invited Hildegard to come sit behind the counter with her. Hildegard could put her things down, although Dagmar sat in her lap. Bodil took down all the ads and brought them over. Between helping patrons, she told Hildegard what she knew about each advertiser. The best one so far had been an older woman that had a room to rent, although Bodil suspected it might not be large enough for both Hildegard and Dagmar.

Hildegard wrinkled her nose about a house with five bedrooms, one available, where all the occupants were young, single, and liked to party. Bodil went to the next one. "Oh, this is a nice fellow if you don't mind rooming with a man. Erik Ramstad."

Hildegard blinked. "Ramstad?"

"Good family." Bodil brightened. "Most of them live down in Oslo now, I think. I was in the same year as his older brother, Håkon. Erik was going with Siv Cappelen, but they split up a couple months ago. Now I think about it, I'm not sure they were living together. . ."

While Bodil pondered on that, Hildegard took the ad to read. She pressed her lips together. "You said he's nice?"

"Ja, keeps to himself mostly. Works as a guide. I'm not sure what it's really called, but he takes tour groups up the mountains on hikes. Makes sure they don't get lost or die or get hurt, things like that."

Hildegard hummed. "Says he wants someone responsible."

"Do you not think you fit the bill? You're a mum, you must be at least a little responsible, right?"

Hildegard smiled when Bodil playfully nudged her. "I'll talk to him, I think. Erm. . .how would I find him?"

"You could send him an owl." Bodil wiggled her fingers at Dagmar in a makeshift wave when she looked at her. Although Dagmar didn't tuck her face back in against Hildegard's chest, she still side-eyed Bodil. "Or it might just be quicker to find him at work. You could at least go there and see that he's not halfway up Jiehkkevárri at the moment."

"Where does he work?"

Bodil gave Hildegard directions to the tour centre and let her keep the ad paper. She also gave Dagmar a juice box, which Dagmar happily sipped as Hildegard led her on down the street by her free hand. The tour centre was as obvious as Bodil said it would be. There were fake mountains used as the background for the centre's name.

Hildegard approached the front counter inside. The woman working there smiled.

"Hallo." Her voice had a singing quality to it. "Signing up the little one for the day camp this Saturday?"

"Er—nei," Hildegard replied. Although she was nervous again, Dagmar wasn't so much this time. She just sipped her juice while looking back at the woman, curious. "I was looking for Erik Ramstad, actually. Is he here?"

"In the storehouse, I think. Just a minute."

While Hildegard lingered, she ran her fingers mindlessly through Dagmar's hair. It caused her eyelids to flutter.

"Mamma, I'm tired," Dagmar whined.

"I know, jenta mi," Hildegard replied. "We'll find somewhere you can lay down pretty soon."

Footsteps returned. Maybe because it was Hildegard's memories or because they were just young, but Erik looked more handsome now than Narcissa ever objectively considered him being. Despite the situation Hildegard had found herself in, Narcissa couldn't help but smile. She knew where this first meeting wound up, even if the end wasn't a happy one.

Erik studied Hildegard with a furrowed brow. His gaze fell on the ad in her hand, and then Dagmar with her arm wrapped around Hildegard's thigh.

"Hei," he greeted her. "Er, here about the lodging?"

"I hope I'm not bothering you," Hildegard apologized. "Bodil at the inn told me to make sure you weren't up on a mountain somewhere before sending you an owl."

Erik laughed. "Good call. Come on in. I don't think Ole will care if we chat while I work. Er, just so you know, I only have one room available. It's a decent size, but ja. Furnished with one bed. And I have a cat. He's good with kids, just letting you know. And rent is twelve romer a month. I'll knock some off if you feed Grim while I'm off on a tour. Saves me having to ask the neighbour."

Hildegard didn't say anything in response. She chewed on her bottom lip, growing nervous again. Erik invited her to sit at a desk while he fetched what he'd been doing in the storehouse. He returned with some straps he'd been mending.

"Erm. . .here's the thing." Hildegard's voice shook slightly and her eyes glistened. "I don't have any money yet. I only just came to town today. We don't have anything. Bodil said something about that people around here are generous. I hate to ask anything of anyone—and I do intend to pay once I get some money—but Dagmar and I are starting things new."

Erik looked at Dagmar, who was staring intently at him. He smiled. "That must be you? Dagmar?"

"Hairy face," Dagmar said.

Hildegard's eyes widened and her cheeks went deep red. Mortified as she looked, Erik laughed so hard his head tilted back.

"Indeed." Erik ran his hand over his facial hair. "Funny kid."

"Sorry," Hildegard said anyway. "I don't think she's ever known a man who had facial hair, now I think about it."

"But ja, we could figure something out." Erik folded his arms and shrugged. "To be honest, I don't need the money. Offer stuff for free or cheap though, and you get some weird ones. Learned that the hard way."

"I'll pay the twelve romer," Hildegard insisted. "I just need—well. That's the other thing. I've never actually worked."

"What're you good at? I know some places looking to hire."

Hildegard pressed her lips together, then shrugged. "I don't really know."

"Simplest one I know then while you figure that out is the bookstore I shop at." Erik toyed with some hair on his chin. Dagmar was still fascinated, and not at all aware that she had embarrassed her mum. "The owner Karin takes her daughter to work with her. You might be able to make a case to take Dagmar with you too. It would save you in childcare."

"I didn't even think about that." Hildegard's arms tightened around Dagmar's middle.

"Hey, tell you what. Let me see if Ole cares I take off for today. I was just puttering, anyway. We could go talk to Karin and I'll show you where I live. See if you like it."

"Okay."

"Got a name, by the way?"

Hildegard told him, and Erik headed off to find his boss. A few minutes later, they were leaving the centre. Dagmar whined again about being tired, which made Erik suggest they just head straight to his place and worry about work later. It was more important anyway that they get settled in somewhere.

Dagmar started complaining then about needing to wee, so it was good they headed that way. In a glimpse of Hildegard's memories after Magnus had taken Bjorn, one of the effects Dagmar experienced from the trauma of it was regressing on her potty training. Hildegard had cautiously gotten her back onto it, and she looked relieved to not have to clean up a mess as Dagmar finished up in the toilet at Erik's.

He was waiting for them out in the living room. "That'd be your own bathroom, anyway. I have one in my bedroom I'll just use. And that's the room beside it. Is it big enough for the two of you?"

Hildegard doubled back to look. It had a bed the same size as hers on the island. The room itself was a little smaller. It had big windows and a door that led out to the deck. "Ja, that'd be just fine. Perfect, really. Dagmar prefers to sleep with me."

Erik smiled warmly. "All right."

Dagmar gasped beside Hildegard and grabbed her hand. She pointed at Grim, who was sprawled out in one of the sunbeams. "Look!"

"That's Grim." Erik got off the couch and headed over to him. When Erik poked him in the belly with his toe, Grim lifted his head. Two bleary, yellow eyes peered out of it. "He's still pretty young, so he's playful. Not that you'd know it right now."

"Dagmar's never seen a cat before," Hildegard said.

"Oh really?" That was probably the first thing Hildegard said that made Erik sound surprised. He picked up Grim with a grunt and carried him back over to the couch. "Want to say hi, Dagmar? He'll purr if you pet him."

Dagmar looked up at Hildegard, uncertain. Hildegard gave her a reassuring smile and came with her over to the couch. Dagmar was more comfortable in Hildegard's lap, but she got really excited when she ran her hand down Grim's glossy side.

"So soft," she said. "And the sound!"

"That's a purr," Erik told her. "Cats do it when they're happy."

"He's happy, Mamma," Dagmar repeated, matter-of-factly.

"I see that." Hildegard squeezed her.

Because it cheered Dagmar up to meet Grim, she wasn't so grumpy about being tired. Her eyes grew heavy, so Hildegard took her into the bedroom and readied her for a kip. Grim was back in his sunbeam, and Erik had moved into the kitchen.

"Hungry?" he asked.

"I could eat," Hildegard replied. She lingered awkwardly by the table while Erik put together a couple sandwiches.

"Take a seat," Erik invited her. "We can just go over stuff more fully over lunch. Wouldn't hurt to put everything in some form of writing."

"Okay."

Hildegard was still awkward, but less obviously so once she sat at the table. She looked all around the flat.

"So you just moved here, you said?" Erik asked as he placed a sandwich in front of Hildegard. "Where are you from?"

Hildegard hesitated. "I was born in Roskilde. I've kind of lived all over."

"Denmark, huh?" Erik studied her a little closer. "I don't remember seeing you at Kapsferd. Homeschooled?"

"I guess." Hildegard paused again. "Sorry, we've been a little nomadic. I don't know how to explain it, really."

"Just like that?"

Hildegard relaxed enough to break off a small piece of bread crust. "Ja."

"I guess the only thing I'd really have to ask about your past is who I'd contact if anything happens to you," Erik carried on. "Not that I expect that to happen, of course, but you must have parents or something that you'd want to take care of Dagmar?"

Hildegard froze. "I never thought of that."

"Nei?"

As much as Hildegard fought it and tried to keep Erik from seeing, her eyes misted. "I'm all she has. What would happen to her if something happened to me?"

"Erm. . ." Erik shifted in his seat. "I suppose the Ministry would get involved."

That was too much for Hildegard to hear. She could hide her eyes behind a hand, but crying was too obvious otherwise. Her shoulders shook, her sniffles sounded wet, and what parts of her face were visible could've stood to be wiped.

"I have no idea what I'm doing," Hildegard said. "Maybe I shouldn't have even come. But if we're alone again and something happens to me, she wouldn't survive anyway. She's too little."

"Hey, don't worry," Erik tried to comfort her. "I'll help you figure it out. I get things are a bit overwhelming right now. You've got a roof over your head and food in the ice box. Everything else can just build on top of that. Right?"

Hildegard ran the sleeves of the jumper she wore over her cheeks. Her eyes were crisply blue from remaining welled up. She sniffled. "I guess."

"One thing at a time." Erik took a bite from his sandwich. "Don't worry about the guardian thing for now. When Dagmar's awake, did you want to head down to the bookstore? Getting that sorted out might make you feel better."

"Okay."

Hildegard felt good enough then to eat lunch, and her memories shifted forward again. She indeed got on at the bookstore, and Dagmar went with her everyday. Karin had a daughter named Astrid who was a few years older than Dagmar. Astrid had lots of games in the back room that Dagmar was interested in. She really enjoyed colouring and puzzles. Since she was in a bookstore everyday, it turned into a good opportunity for Dagmar to start becoming interested in books. She was too young to read yet, but she listened to Astrid sound out some of the simpler children's books. Dagmar liked copying the letters and pictures into her own drawings.

One day when Hildegard was putting books on the shelf, Erik approached her in the aisle. She beamed when she noticed him. "Hey, you're back."

"Ja," he replied. "We got snowed in for an entire day, so I ended up reading everything I took with me. Figured I'd swing by and grab something on my way home."

"There's a few new things this week, if you're interested. Oh, and Dagmar drew you a picture. If you're in a rush, I can tell her to give it to you later."

"If she's excited, I won't make her wait."

Hildegard had a cheeky grin as Dagmar presented Erik with a misshapen rendition of Grim. Were it not for the two yellow eyes in the middle, Narcissa wouldn't know either what the black blob was supposed to be. He had four legs, but his tail was closer to his head than his bum.

Erik was squatted down beside her as he looked at it. "Wow, you drew him from the front, didn't you? I see why you put his tail there. What a little artist."

Dagmar glowed with pride. "Thank you."

"This is for me?" Erik asked her. "I get to keep it?"

"Ja." Dagmar pointed to the bottom of the paper, where she'd carefully written 'Til Erik Frå Dagmar'.

"That's so kind. Thank you."

Hildegard lowered her voice to Erik when Dagmar returned to the back of the store. "It's really all right?"

Erik showed her the picture, his eyes glinting with amusement. "It's kind of hard to mess up drawing a black cat."

The joke disarmed Hildegard enough for her to smile again. "I mean that she gave it to you."

"Why wouldn't it be?" Erik shrugged. "I'm not in the business of discouraging little kids."

"I just don't know if you meant her to get that attached to you."

"She's a good kid." Still, Erik's lighthearted demeanour turned more serious. "If you don't like it, I can back off. It's okay. I'm sure you didn't mean for her to latch on."

Hildegard pressed her lips together, arms folded as she looked through to the back. Dagmar and Astrid had been busy working on a puzzle all afternoon.

"I don't know," Hildegard eventually said. "It's hard because I think it's a good thing for her. We just haven't been here long enough to know what's permanent."

"That's fair." Although it didn't seem like it'd been that long since they first met, maybe a month or two, Erik still looked disappointed. "I'll leave it up to you? If it's good for her, I don't want to push her away. Kids don't really understand that."

"So long as it doesn't bother you."

"Nei, not at all."

Still, Hildegard looked torn. She watched Erik leave the store and seemed distracted for the rest of her workday. Erik was cooking something when Hildegard and Dagmar returned to the flat. He'd trimmed his facial hair down after a week out on a mountain, and his hair was still damp from a shower.

"You two want some?" Erik asked her.

"Sure."

Dagmar stayed in the kitchen, excited that the picture she'd drawn Erik wound up on the ice box. Hildegard needed to change out of her work clothes. She couldn't hear what Dagmar was saying from the bedroom, but she was babbling about something to Erik. It was clear from the memory that Dagmar had spent a lot of time lately in the company of adults. Dagmar emulated the serious way that adults spoke, even if her words were gibberish and her sentences tended to trail off. Erik went along with it anyway, expressing amazement when it seemed appropriate or asking a question when Dagmar lost her train of thought.

Hildegard joined them in the kitchen when she wore clothes more suited to relaxing for the evening. Her arms were visible, so Narcissa noticed that her runes were gone. "Can I help with anything?"

"Could mash potatoes, if you don't mind," Erik said.

While Hildegard did, her gaze flitted frequently over to Erik. He caught her a couple times. Narcissa tried to see any hint the feelings that eventually led to them being married were manifesting yet, but she wasn't so sure. Hildegard still seemed leery. Narcissa didn't blame her one bit on that. Although Hildegard and Erik seemed to get on all right, a man had come into Hildegard's life and taken one of her children away. She fought with herself in the memory, since it was certainly a big deal that Dagmar could trust anyone resembling a father figure again. They also relied on Erik, since they lived under his roof. Hildegard couldn't exactly separate them.

Time jumped to later in the evening. Or, Narcissa figured, it had to be another day because Hildegard was wearing different clothes and her hair was loose rather than in a plait. The sun was quite high up in the sky while Erik packed his pipe out on the deck. Narcissa only remembered him ever doing that after dinner. Hildegard sat with him.

"I got this today from Karin." Hildegard handed a card over to Erik. "I was too embarrassed to ask what it was."

Erik glanced it over. "An invitation to a birthday party?"

"It's for Dagmar," Hildegard said. "Astrid's friend Line is having one, and Line's mum thought Dagmar might like to go. What is it?"

"Just a get-together." Erik shrugged, pausing as he lit his pipe with something like a snap of his fingers. "A bunch of kids run around playing together, and then they'll eat cake. You take a gift for the birthday kid, and the kid opens them all. All the guests get a goody bag from the host when they leave, usually with sweets and toys."

"Hm." Hildegard took the card back and studied it. "I don't really know Line's mum."

"Is that Inger?" Erik asked. "She's nice. Since Line's turning—what, four?—you'd be expected to stick around. Dagmar wouldn't have to be there alone if she turns shy."

"I guess the only person I'd have to worry about is me, then." Hildegard chuckled nervously. "I'm not sure I fit in very well. I'm still getting used to everything. Kids celebrate their birthday every year then, or what?"

"Oh ja. It's a big deal to them. It's their day." Erik studied Hildegard as he drew in from his pipe. "I take it you don't know yours then, or Dagmar's. She might want a birthday party after she goes to Line's."

"Erm. . ." Hildegard thought about it. "I had her in the middle of summer. She's seen two winters, so I guess she'll be three here pretty soon."

"Can't narrow it down anymore than middle of summer? She'll need a specific date for a party."

Hildegard had to look at a calendar for that. Erik went inside to fetch one for her.

"Middle of August, I guess?" she said. "I could just say the fifteenth."

"I'll put it on there when I have a quill handy," Erik replied. "What about you?"

"Er. . ." Hildegard stilted again, laughing lightly when her cheeks darkened. "This feels so silly not to know. It's before the summer solstice. Maybe around now, actually."

"Could say the fifteenth again." Erik turned back from August to May. "Then you won't forget, plus it's on Sunday. We could have a practice birthday party before Line's so you know what to expect."

"Like invite people over, or. . .?"

"Don't have to." Erik shook his head. "That's more for kids, really. Well, adults still like having parties on their birthday, but it's more the kind with lots of alcohol and loud music."

Hildegard scrunched her nose. "I'm not much into that."

"Ja, you're kind of an old soul, aren't you?"

Hildegard stared at Erik as he took from his pipe again, nervous. "What gives you that idea?"

"It's just a saying." Smoke flitted out of Erik's mouth and nose as he spoke. "Means you're mature beyond your age."

"Oh."

There it was for Erik, or at least a glimpse of Hildegard realizing there was something between them in the way he briefly looked at her before returning his attention to the calendar. "So how old would you be this year, do you reckon?"

Hildegard hummed as she thought. "Twenty-one."

"Seems about right." Erik smiled anew at her. "Same age as me."

Hildegard softened. "When's your birthday?"

"Seventeenth of February."

"Oh." Hildegard grew disappointed. "So it already happened, then."

"That's the nice thing about birthdays." Erik nudged her. "They happen every year."

In the back of her mind, Narcissa had noticed that the longer Hildegard knew Erik, the more handsome he became. There was a noticeable change there. By the time Erik showed Dagmar the next Sunday how to wear a party hat and sing Happy Birthday, the change to his appearance in Hildegard's mind was drastic. Hildegard still put her face in her hands out of embarrassment when being sung to over a cake. She grinned when Erik told her to blow out the candles on top of it. Dagmar got the first slice of blotkake, which was apparently tasty enough to make her dance a little on the chair she kneeled on.

"Thank you," Hildegard told Erik when things went quiet while they ate. "This is really lovely."

"You're welcome." Erik's eyes crinkled when he smiled. "It's not over yet, though. You still have to open your gift."

"Oh no." Hildegard flushed red again with an airy laugh.

"I think you'll like the card. Just a minute."

Erik went into his bedroom. He came back with a folded piece of parchment. It was weighed down with a few things slipped inside. Hildegard's eyes misted as she looked at the front of the homemade card. Dagmar had drawn a picture of Hildegard with a few hearts and wrote 'gratulerer med dagen Mamma' along the top in her careful but unsteady hand.

"What a beautiful card." Hildegard sniffled lightly before looking at Dagmar. "You did this all by yourself?"

"Not the words." Dagmar leaned over the table so she could point at them. "Erik showed me."

Dagmar was too little yet for her Rs to harden like Erik and Hildegard's did. Narcissa smiled at how cute it sounded when Dagmar called him Ewik instead.

"This is so thoughtful," Hildegard told her. "I look so pretty."

"You are pretty."

Hildegard's expression softened even further. "Thank you, jenta mi."

There were a couple things inside the folded piece of parchment. One was an off-white coupon that was good to be redeemed for an afternoon at the witch-run spa.

"You never do anything for yourself," Erik explained with a shrug and smile when Hildegard looked at him.

She didn't argue, although a new glow came up in her cheeks. The other item had to be opened. It was a necklace that Narcissa actually recognized from seeing Hildegard wear in-future, that had a constellation as a pendant.

"I don't know if you care about astrology or not," Erik said with a bit of a laugh. "It's all a little silly, but you probably don't know your sign, huh? You're a Taurus."

"What does that mean?" Hildegard regarded it fondly anyway.

"There should be a little thing there. . ." Erik reached across the table to take the little booklet that came with it. "Well, you're ruled over by Venus, whatever that means. Probably something about being feminine, which, surprise, you are indeed a woman."

Hildegard laughed.

"You are grounded, practical, and realistic," Erik summarized. "You always want to be surrounded by love and beauty. You don't like sudden changes."

"Does anybody?"

"Some, maybe." Erik's glance was warm. "That's what I mean about astrology being silly. All these things they say could apply to anyone. I like the constellations, though. I thought you might too."

"I do." Hildegard fought with the chain's clasp to open it. "I recognize this one, actually."

"Do I have one?" Dagmar piped up.

"You do!" Erik replied, making her light up. "You're a Leo."

"What's that?"

"Like a lion." Erik ran his hands over his cheeks. "Remember that big cat that has all the hair around its head?"

Dagmar's excitement grew. "Ooh."

"You're the queen of the constellations, and you can do whatever you work hard enough for. Guess which planet rules you?"

"What?" Dagmar said with a giggle.

"None. The only one capable of that is the sun."

It was a good day in Hildegard's memories. It ended with a glimpse of Hildegard and Erik out on the deck after Dagmar had been put to bed. Hildegard could hardly express her gratitude in words, so she ended up hugging Erik. It turned into an embrace when neither of them made a move to separate. They did eventually, and the air between them grew still as they carried on chatting. There was no ignoring how handsome Erik looked to Hildegard now, and she thought about him a lot. Narcissa could see the first bridge between a fancy and love when Hildegard was greeted outside the spa by Erik and Dagmar. They weren't far from an ice cream shop, so headed home with three cones between them. Dagmar had chocolate all over her face.

Hildegard and Erik sat out on the deck a different night. The distance between their chairs had gradually shrunk over time. Erik had to turn his head to exhale off his pipe so that none of the smoke went into Hildegard's face.

"Can I ask you something?" Erik feigned casualness.

Hildegard tucked some hair behind her ear. "Mhm."

Erik drew from his pipe again, definitely nervous if he was delaying. Hildegard's smile shrunk a little as she followed him toward seriousness.

"Is there something here?" he asked.

"Where?"

"Between us." Erik let out an airy laugh when Hildegard, brow furrowed, looked down at the literal gap separating them. "I mean like feelings. We get along really well, and I like you a lot. You've never felt like a lodger. More like a friend."

Colour seeping into Hildegard's cheeks was pretty indicative of her response. She tried to hide that and a grin behind her hand, but it was a pointless endeavour. Quickly as it came on, she turned nervous. Erik didn't seem to know what to make of that.

"There's some fuzziness," Hildegard confirmed. "I'm just not sure if I'm ready for something like that. There's been some things that happened before to put me off about men. I find them hard to trust. You're definitely different, don't get me wrong."

"I hope you don't take it the wrong way that I could tell," Erik replied. "I mean, it doesn't take much to guess when a single mum shows up with nothing but her kid. And you never talk about Dagmar's dad, so. . ."

Hildegard toyed with her fingers in her lap. Her mouth worked while she thought.

"He wasn't a bad man," she eventually said. "It was just really bad when he left. He tried to take the kids. He managed, with our son."

While Hildegard's eyes welled, Erik's face fell. He studied her. "Was that Bjorn?"

"How do you know his name?"

"Dagmar mentioned him." Erik gave a slow shrug. "I thought maybe that was her dad's name. I didn't push her on it or anything. Didn't think it was my place."

"What did she say?" Hildegard wiped an eye.

"Just something about when he comes home."

Hildegard nodded slowly, thinking again. "I'm trying to find him, but I have no idea where to even start. It's why I came to Tromsø. I don't think he's here, or anything. I probably would've seen him by now, if he was. This place felt safe, though. Far enough away from where most people live, where I could learn how the wizarding world works and go from there. That's about all I've been doing so far. Sometimes it doesn't feel like enough, like the longer I wait the further Bjorn is getting away from me."

"I could help," Erik said. "Who's his father? I take it he wasn't a nomad like you, if you had to come into the wizarding world to find him."

"Erm, Magnus Norheim." Hildegard sniffled. "He lived in Trondheim."

"Norheim," Erik repeated, sitting up straighter. "I know him. Well, of him. He went to Kapsferd. Few years ahead of me, but he was a Quidditch player. Hard to miss those ones."

"I went into Trondheim before I came here," Hildegard said. "He was gone. Skipped town. I found his flat, but he didn't live there anymore. Same about his work."

Erik hummed. "What did anyone say that you talked to?"

"Nothing, really." Hildegard sighed, deflating. "He quit his job the night he left. Just sent his boss an owl. His landlord said he gave notice. His mates went by to clear out the flat and put his things in storage."

"Did you talk to any of them? Any family he had?"

"I didn't know his mates' names, and I tried asking around. He has a sister, but I didn't talk to her. I didn't want to draw too much attention to myself, was the thing."

"I see." Erik drew from his pipe, holding the smoke in his lungs while he thought. "Well, if you want me to poke around, I don't mind. I might remember his mates."

"That would be kind of you, but you don't have to do anything if you don't want to."

"If I didn't want to, I wouldn't offer." Erik reached toward her hand, stilting awkwardly before balling up his fingers on his knee. "I've enjoyed helping you. I just enjoy being around you, really. I hope it's not presumptuous to say that I feel a sense of responsibility toward you and Dagmar. With her especially, I know it's not my place. I just can't help it when she's latched onto me."

"It's been good for her." Hildegard pulled down the sleeve of her shirt to wipe her eye again. She managed to smile this time. "I haven't really known what to do either, about that. She's still in a vulnerable place about what happened. She seems back on track for things like her potty training and she isn't as clingy, but she has nightmares about it. I'm a little surprised actually that she mentioned Bjorn to you. She used to draw him beside me and her, but she doesn't so much anymore. I don't know if she's reacting to what happened by starting to forget him. Maybe for now it's not the worst thing in the world. It still makes me feel like a terrible mother. I don't know how I'd ever explain what happened when she's older. And if Bjorn never comes home. . ."

The cautious smile Hildegard wore gradually disappeared while she talked, until it had vanished completely. Erik stayed quiet, just listening.

"It's just so hard to believe." Hildegard's breath shuddered as she inhaled. "You know, you carry a child, you watch him grow a little, you fall in love, and then he's gone. It's almost like he didn't exist in the first place, but there's this ache—this pain—that never goes away. I don't even know how to describe it. Sometimes it hurts, sometimes it just feels like a hole inside of me."

"I kind of get it," Erik said, although he was hesitant. "I had something like that sort of happen to me. Definitely not that bad. All considered, I got off about as easy as possible, but it's hard not to think about."

Hildegard sniffled. "What happened?"

"My ex was pregnant, but she lost it." Erik cleared his throat. "We didn't know about it until that happened, is the thing. So it's a very weird feeling when you're told you lost something you didn't even realize you had."

"Ja," Hildegard quietly agreed. "Is that why you broke up, or. . .?"

"Sort of. We weren't really all that serious, and definitely didn't mean for that to happen. Maybe if the pregnancy stuck, the conversation about what we saw for ourselves would've been a lot different. When the conversation became do we want to be serious enough for that to maybe happen again on purpose someday, Siv decided she wasn't ready. I mean, we are pretty young. She's a year younger than us. So being with a man at nineteen and planning already for things like kids and marriage is just a little too much."

"For some, I guess."

Erik managed a tight laugh. "Ja, I don't mean it as anything against what decisions you might've made. It's different for everyone."

Hildegard didn't look offended, anyway. She was smiling again. "Is that why you've taken to having me and Dagmar around?"

"Nei, it's not like I see you two as a replacement or anything. Could be having a family was in the back of my mind, but I don't look at you and think about Siv. I don't look at Dagmar and wonder what could've been, either. I just enjoy this."

"So do I."

"That's why I'm asking if there's something happening here." Erik steered them back to the initial point of the conversation. "Maybe after Siv, it'd be easy to imagine something. I can't ignore the parallels. I also don't want to let things get any weirder if I am the only one that feels that way. You're technically my lodger. You and Dagmar are vulnerable. You rely on me to help you navigate all the things you're unfamiliar with. There's an imbalance."

"I guess there is." Hildegard squinted as the sun came out from behind a cloud. "We can't really deny that, can we?"

"Nei."

"So what do you want, exactly?"

"Just. . .this," Erik said after a moment of thought. "I like having you two here. I like spending time with you. I just want clarification the mutual enjoyment isn't all in my head."

"It's not." Hildegard paused, pulling her bottom lip briefly back between her teeth. "I guess I don't know what would happen if I figured out what direction to go, to try and find Bjorn."

"Wouldn't happen to have room for one more?"

"I don't know what would happen after I find Bjorn, either," Hildegard said. "I planned on going home."

Erik tilted his head a little as he considered her. "I thought you said you were a bit of a nomad. And that you had no family."

"It's. . ." Hildegard shrugged, either unable or unwilling to explain the island's nature. "I guess it doesn't necessarily mean I can't go back and forth between here and there. A problem I had with Magnus was that he wanted me to live in Trondheim. I didn't want to. I was too scared to. I guess I've had no choice but to get over that now. I like it here."

"Part of talking about this would be organizing maybe sticking together." Erik nudged Hildegard with a glint in his eye. "Is that something you'd be interested in?"

"I'd feel pretty bad to take Dagmar away from you, at this point," Hildegard mused. "I don't think she'd understand. She might have a hard time getting attached to anyone after that. I don't want her to think that getting attached to someone is dangerous."

"You don't have to worry about going somewhere I might not want to," Erik replied. "I'll go wherever you want. I like travelling. Sometimes I regret outright buying this flat because it means I'm anchored here. I love Tromsø, don't get me wrong, but there's still some wanderlust in me."

Hildegard studied Erik. "I guess that's a bridge we'd have to cross once we get there."

"Just to put out there too, money's no object to me. I come from a wealthy family." The loose tobacco in Erik's pipe glowed orange briefly. "I don't actually have to work. I just like to. So you don't have to worry about hurting my wallet if you decided you need to leave Tromsø and were okay with me coming along."

Hildegard kept looking at Erik. Her eyes softened first, and then the corners of her mouth pulled up slightly. "A travel companion would be lovely. So long as you're sure."

"I'm sure," he said. "I like you. If I could help you find Bjorn, I'd feel pretty good about that."

"I don't know how I'd ever repay you." Hildegard crossed her legs with a sigh. "I couldn't even tell you how grateful I'd be."

"Well, let's worry about actually doing that, first." Erik chuckled, then trailed off as he and Hildegard looked at each other again. "So—sorry, I'm going to keep coming back to this because I'm looking for a straight answer. What about you and me? I mean, we're already living together, we get along really well, and I think I hit it off pretty good with your kid. We don't have to live together as a landlord and lodger. We could call it something else. That just depends on what you want."

"What do you want?" Hildegard asked.

Erik put a foot up against the deck railing, slouching into a familiar sitting position. "I don't mean to come off as condescending, but you do know what a partnership is, right? Was Magnus just Dagmar and Bjorn's father, or did you two spend time together? Sleep in the same bed? Plan anything, like marriage or living together?"

"He visited me. . ." Hildegard trailed off into a shrug. "I guess he was trying to plan things. He wanted me to live with him, but I wanted to stay where I was. I tried to leave because I generally move around, but I ended up going back because Dagmar missed him. I guess I missed him too. We slept in the same bed, ja."

"Maybe things are just different where you're from," Erik mused. "If you find Magnus, do you still want to carry on with him?"

Hildegard's body went rigid. She shook her head.

"Okay."

"I guess I don't really know what you're looking for," Hildegard said. "What would change?"

"That would be up for us to decide. If we both want sex, then we can do that. Snog, go on dates. . .if we're more serious too, then it makes things a lot more clear about how I would treat Dagmar."

Hildegard's one foot jiggled slightly. She looked out beyond the deck toward where the sun hovered in the west. Narcissa had a feeling it must be getting close to the beginning of the midnight sun. While Hildegard pressed her lips together, thinking, Erik packed his pipe again.

"Don't get me wrong, I like the idea of it all," Hildegard said. "It was only in January or so that Magnus left. It's just a little too soon."

Erik nodded.

"I trust you with Dagmar, though." Hildegard returned her gaze to Erik. "You must understand how big of a deal that is for me, right?"

"It's unbelievable the bar is so low for men in your life that you literally have to trust them not to take your children, but. . .I promise I'd never do that to you."

"I know."

Erik at some point had to eventually learn the truth about where Dagmar and Bjorn came from. Hildegard wasn't risking it now, like she had with Magnus. Even if Hildegard was scared, Narcissa supposed that she at some level understood Magnus wouldn't have done what he did if he didn't know the truth.

For now, Erik seemed pretty content with the outcome. His gaze softened again as he looked at Hildegard while drawing from his pipe. "So what do you see this looking like right now, then?"

"Erm. . ." Hildegard bunched her lips off to one side. "I'm not really sure. My main focus is Dagmar. Everything after that is secondary."

"Fair enough."