"Stay safe, okay? No cliff diving or swimming with sharks or trudging through alligator infested swamps," Edward warned as he leaned down to press another kiss to Bella's forehead. The terminal at Sea-Tac was bustling around them, not paying much attention to the odd trio.
"I will," Bella said, "Stay safe I mean." Edward gave her a gentle smile and looked to Grace.
"Got everything you need?" he asked.
"I think so," Grace held up an ancient tome of Shakespeare's collected works.
"Good, I'll see you two in four days," he let a dramatic sigh and Bella gave a laugh wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him again. Grace rolled her eyes and turned toward the gate waving a fruitless goodbye to the engrossed couple.
As they boarded the plane, Grace checked her phone before turning it off. Jake, as usual, had been MIA for the few days after her birthday when she turned him down not so subtly. She could tell from her rounds with Embry that he wasn't taking it well but trying his best not to let it show. To her surprise, she had a new text. She tried to contain her excitement as she opened it.
SMS Text—8:32 a.m.: Paul
Have a safe flight.
"Whaaaat the fuck," Grace groaned looking at her phone.
"What is it?" Bella said behind her. Grace snapped her phone shut and powered it down.
"Nothing." Why was Paul texting her of all people! Of all people!?
Florida gave Grace an excuse to bust out her real summer wardrobe, one that she usually flaunted during the humid Oklahoma summers—crop tops and stringy tank tops and bralettes that she tried to tell her mom were bikini tops. Bella was a little overwhelmed by this suddenly exuberant, bare skinned version of Grace.
"Prude," Grace teased her as she removed her spirit stone and laced a thin gold chain around her neck like a choker. It glittered against Grace's perfectly sunkissed skin. The Florida sun was kind to Grace. Bella...not so much. Renee had slapped a giant wide brimmed sun hat on her on their first day there on the beach slathering her in sunscreen while Grace and her mother laid out in the sun.
"So, tell me about Edward," Renee probed as they settled on the back porch of her bungalow that faced the silver sanded beach. The girls were each given a glass of white wine as a celebration for their graduation. Grace was already sneaking them extra glasses when she went back to the kitchen for a napkin, an ice cube, some lotion.
Bella's explanation came in around the end of her second glass. "He's….." she looked at each woman for a moment and then with an exasperated huff she said, "He's perfect. Really. I have no idea how this happened...to me." Both Renee and Cherie let out little sighs of appreciation.
"Tell us more!" Cherie prompted. "What's he like? What drew you to him? How did you two first meet?"
Grace smiled behind her third glass of wine and could only imagine the scene playing Bella's head. What had drawn her to him? Mmm, the fact that he was a dangerously handsome and alluring vampire that had a thing for her blood? How did they meet? Oh, he saved her from getting smashed by a van and she just knew he was the one.
Bella looked to Grace for help, her mouth hanging open, not sure how to explain.
"They met in biology," Grace replied easily, completely toasted, "Super romantic."
"Biology is a very romantic subject. Huddled around a lab table. Dissecting frogs," Renee teased.
"Mom," Bella groaned.
"What?! He seems very nice from the very little that you tell me," Renee said, giving her a smack on the arm.
"Tell me about it." Cherie said, taking a sip of her wine.
"What does that mean?" Grace tested.
"Nothing, only that apparently you had a boyfriend out in La Push for like two months and I had no idea until you two had broken up. What was his name," Cherie snapped her fingers together multiple times trying to recall his name, "Uh...uh."
"Paul, mom," Grace said, annoyed and downing the rest of her glass. She got up to get another, not even offering an excuse this time.
"Paul! Paul Lahote!" Cherie said triumphantly, "I knew the Lahote family when I was there. Nice people. Well, except for the dad. Jeremy? Jerry? He had a bit of an anger problem."
Grace rolled her eyes in the kitchen and filled her glass close to the rim.
"My relationship with Paul is not...was not like Bella and Edward's. They are madly in love with one another. We were just hanging out," Grace said, shooting Bella an uncomfortable look. Bella watched her face and knew that that wasn't true.
"Well you still could have told me," Cherie said a little disheartened.
"Sorry, will do next time." Grace said dismissively.
"What about Billy's son? Jacob?" Cherie offered.
"Mom, no." Grace groaned.
"What!? Charlie said you two were hanging out and I didn't know if it was the same kind of hanging out that you do with Paul or?" She waggled her eyebrows at her daughter. Grace couldn't help but laugh.
"Mom stop!" Grace said a smile cracking across her face, "It's not like that. And anyway, we're talking about Edward and Bella." She motioned to Bella.
"There's not really much else to tell, we're together, we're happy, I hope that continues….forever," Bella breathed.
Renee looked at her daughter carefully and patted her thigh. The rest of the evening was spent talking about colleges, plans for the future, Cherie's upcoming interview, and Renee's adjustment to Florida life.
At a little past 1 a.m., Bella and Grace turned into bed and told their mom's to leave the dishes for the morning. The two women had their arms around each other and were singing an old Fleetwood Mac song at one another and Grace gave a delighted snort.
"Cute." She poured the half glass of wine left in the bottle into her glass and followed Bella to bed. Grace was definitely drunk. She had probably coasted through an entire bottle of wine by herself tonight without her mother knowing. Something about that gave her a freeing sensation. Bella went to the bathroom to shower and left Grace alone with her thoughts.
The words that her mother had mentioned at dinner swirled around in her head.
What was his name? Paul! That's right! Paul Lahote.
Grace tried to shake her head of her last memory of her and Paul alone. He had undressed her and though he tried his best not to look, she could feel his burning gaze all over her. Now, in her drunken state it annoyed her.
What about Billy's son? Jacob?
Grace let out an audible groan. Of course her mother would know about Jake. And what was worse, she knew her mother could see that she had blushed profusely at his name. A dead giveaway.
Why was this all so complicated? Did her ancestors have a death wish for her? Was this supposed to bring her some sort of triumph over adversity thing? Or was she truly just meant to be miserable forever? And why did she feel like she was doing this alone?
Her eyes lazily landed on her phone plugged in on the nightstand.
"Fuck this," Grace said, grabbing her phone and dropping it on the floor accidentally before scooping it up, downing the rest of her glass and finding the right contact in her phone.
"Hello?" It was late here but it was only after 10 p.m. back in Forks. Of course he'd be awake.
"You really piss me off, you know that?" Grace said pointing to the air in front of her.
"Excuse me?"
"You have the absolute audacity to look at me the way that you do on a daily basis and think I won't notice? You stare. STARE at me and I can see it you know? Some people would say that's pretty creepy, that's pretty stalker-ery of you, yah know?"
"Grace, are you drunk?"
"Listen to me! I know how this is supposed to go. Guy meets girl, girl falls for guy and then a bunch of stupid shit happens and now guy's like 'Hey, I'm gonna stare at you from afar and not fucking talk to you won't that drive you crazy?' And it does! It does! You did it. Congrats. You did it. It's driving me crazy."
"Grace, calm down for a sec—"
"Don't tell me to calm down! Do I need to hold a sign? Helloooo, Do you need me to spell it out for you?"
"I have no idea what you're talking—"
"Yeah right, you know. You know. You've known this whole time. You've talked to Ti'Hal, you know."
"Grace, let's just talk about this when you get home."
"No! I want to talk about it right now. I want to tell you what I've been thinking these past three weeks. The thing I couldn't say and up until now, I didn't know if I should, but I'm gonna and you're gonna hear it buddy. You hear me?!"
"Grace what are you doing?" Bella came out of the bathroom and was wrapped in a robe, her hair up in a towel, "Who's on the phone?"
"Hold on, Bella's here." Grace turned drunkenly to Bella stumbling a little. "I'm just gonna tell him." She said confidently, shaking the phone and slurring her speech now.
"Grace, let's go to bed. Give me the phone," Bella approached her like she was a rabid animal, knowing she needed to get that phone away from her before she made a mistake.
"I'm just gonna tell him!" Grace turned to yell into the phone, but Bella was quick, "I'm in love with you! You complete fucking—" the phone was already knocked out of her hands and Bella had slammed it shut.
"Are you nuts?!" Bella said, laughing a little.
"Probably," Grace sighed sitting on her bed and flopping back onto the pillows.
"I'm holding onto this until morning," Bella said, putting it in her robe pocket. But Grace was already asleep. Bella popped open her phone to look at the last outgoing call. Unsurprised, Bella gave a short laugh at the name glowing from the small screen: Jacob.
The next morning, Grace woke up to a splitting headache and an overwhelming thirst. She dragged herself up out of bed and splashed cold water her face before brushing her teeth and changing into a fresh set of clothes for the day.
As she wandered down into the kitchen, she found Bella washing up last night's dishes at the sink.
"Goooood morning, drunk dialer," Bella said, "Drink that, and take those." She nodded to a talk glass of water on the counter and a couple of pills.
"Nice," Grace said. "What do you mean drunk dialer? Have you seen my phone?" Grace chugging the water and swallowing the pills. Bella produced Grace's phone from her back pocket and set it on the counter.
"I'd wait until you rehydrate before checking those texts." Bella warned.
"What?" Grace grabbed her phone, weak memories coming back to her from last night. She pulled her phone toward her desperately and pulled it open quickly navigating to her inbox.
SMS Text—1:23 a.m.: Jacob
Grace, call me back. I need to talk to you.
I know you're drunk but I thought you said...
Just call me back,
SMS Text—1:43 a.m.: Jacob
I'm sorry I've been staring at you, I like you.
Sue me.
Or don't. Just call me back so we can talk.
SMS Text—1:47 a.m.: Jacob
You're unbelievable you know?
You get drunk 2,000 miles away where I can't get to you to drop this?
Not. Cool.
SMS Text—2:03 a.m.: Jacob
Text me or call me when you wake up.
We need to talk about this.
Grace threw her head back and groaned: "Fuuuuu—morning mom!" Her mother came around from behind her.
"Good morning my only daughter." She planted a kiss on her cheek.
"You say only daughter like you have another daughter hidden away in a basement somewhere." Grace grumbled.
"Are you two ready to go kayaking in the Everglades? Renee's quite the thrill seeker." Cherie ignored her and looked to Bella.
"Yeah, should be fun!" Grace said, perking up. She pocketed her phone and resolved to bury her head so deep in the swamp that an alligator would surely come and tear her to pieces so she'd never have to face Jacob again.
Floating in the kayak was peaceful. Grace let herself drift down the thread of water choked by duckweed and low hanging spanish moss, the morning sun glittering on the water. Ahead, Renee and Cherie were chuckling about something and Bella was gliding quietly next to her.
Lost in her reverie, she didn't realize Bella was next to her until their kayaks bonked together.
"Ooh, sorry," Bella apologized, trying to steer herself straight. "Kayaks aren't meant for the uncoordinated." Grace laughed and gave the back of her kayak a nudge forward. "Thanks."
"Yeah," Grace said simply letting the sound of the water against her paddle lull her into another reverie. But it was short lived.
"So, do you want to talk about what happened last night?" Bella said, giving her a knowing look. Grace internally groaned.
"Not much to say that you didn't already hear," Grace said while she weaved her kayak around a particularly dense patch.
"Mmm I think there's more to say. You're in love with Jacob...but you don't want to be with him because?" Bella prompted. Grace was silent, her eyes on the water, "He's crazy about you you know. Even when you thought there was something going on between us..which to be fair he did have a crush on me for awhile...but even back then, you'd always come up in our conversations. In everything. He'd always ask about you."
Grace had tried to block those early days out. The ones where she was so furiously drawn to Jacob and her stomach would flare angrily when she overhead him and Bella talking.
"It's not as easy as just saying I'm in love with you." Grace finally said.
"You had no trouble saying it last night when you were wasted," Bella joked, ducking her head just in time to not get slapped in the face by moss. Grace shook her head.
"You don't get it," Grace said, "I've already done the heartbreak thing once. You were there, remember?" Bella gave her a pained look as she continued, "For whatever fucked up reason, my ancestors think it's pretty funny to have no one imprint on me or me imprint on anyone, but I still get to fall in love with them. Do you know how excruciatingly awful it is knowing you love someone who can and would leave you if someone they were meant to be with came along? That you could never measure up to? Because of some impossibly, supernatural standard?" Grace was desperate now.
"Yes," Bella said softly, casting her eyes down. Grace stopped at this. That made sense.
"Of course," she said, "Bella, I didn't mean it like that but, you can see why I'm hesitating to jump into anything with Jake. Not to mention, Paul and I just broke up like 3 seconds ago and I'm still trying to figure all of this," she gestured to her whole body, "out." Grace let out an exasperated breath. "It's exhausting. And the worst part is…." she paused here not sure if she wanted to go there. But why shouldn't she? Bella drifted in front of her, looking at her calmly, openly. Bella wouldn't begrudge her her feelings, nor was she in danger of unwillingly sharing them with Jake since her mind was protected from Edwards.
She could tell her this here, in this calm swamp away from everyone, "The worst part is, I so so so want to be with him. Everything in my body, absolutely every part of me wants him. It's terrifying thinking you're staring at your stupid soul mate but knowing that they'll be snatched away from you any second. I can't live through that. Not with Jake. If we were happy and he-," she choked here and took a minute to stop and compose herself, moving forward, her voice hard, "and he left, willingly or unwillingly, I don't think I could come back from that. So I can't risk it Bella, I can't. And it hurts so much every single day to hold that resolve. It feels like it's going against everything to hold myself back. But I just...can't."
After a few minutes paddling forward together, Bella looked at her sadly and nodded, "Okay." Grace gave her nod, "I understand."
"Good, now let's talk about something else." Grace bumped her boat into Bella's.
"Well, since we're sharing secrets…" Bella looked down shyly and Grace's eyes shot toward her, "Edward asked me to marry him."
"WHAT?!" Grace shouted as she rocked her kayak dangerously. Their mother's who were further down the way looked over their shoulders and called out: "Are you okay?"
"Yeah! I think she saw a snake!" Bella called back. "Chill!" she said to Grace laughing. In a hushed voice Grace said:
"Marry?! As in til death do us part, rings and bells?" Bella nodded enthusiastically. "Woah."
"Tell me about it." Bella replied.
"So what did you say!? Did you say yes?! You're 18!"
"I know I'm 18." Bella replied, a tinge of annoyance not targeted at Grace layered in her voice. "And it's not the first time he's asked me. This is like a regular thing with him."
"ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?" Grace said splashing her paddles around her dramatically.
"Grace!" Bella said, darting her eyes toward their mothers again who were laughing and paddling a ways up.
"This isn't the first time?! What is he a glutton for matrimony?" Grace pulled a face and Bella laughed.
"I don't know, maybe."
"SO?! What did you say this time?" Grace begged now.
"I said….I said yes." Bella said barely over the sound of splashing water with a shy smile on her face.
"Oh my GOD! BELLA!" Grace smacked her boat with her paddle.
"Girls!" Cherie called back to them.
"Yeah! Coming!" Bella called back as she tried her best to paddle away. Grace was after her in a second yelling "We're not done talking about this!"
It was their last night and Grace was cuddled up on an outdoor sofa under a soft blanket with her mom. Grace was thumbing through her Shakespeare collection and her mom was finishing a crossword.
After a serene silence that Grace recognized as a common occurrence between the two of them, she heard her mom set down her pencil and look over at her.
"How have you been? Really, I mean." Grace looked over at her slowly. This was a weird turn. Could her mom sense something was up? Grace squirmed a little and her heartbeat picked up.
"Fine, really. Forks is great and like I said, the council gifted me that run down house that I'm fixing up so it's going well." Grace repeated the same status update she had given her mother on their first day.
"But...I know it was hard for you to return to all of that...without your dad, I mean," Cherie spoke quietly now.
"Mom." Grace said softly coming closer to give her a hug, "It really has been okay. I've found a great family out there and it's been good being back on the rez."
Cherie clasped her hands around Grace's shoulder and pulled her tight to her.
"I just worry about you Little Bird," she whispered and kissed the top of her head. That had to be a coincidence. Grace sucked in a deep breath and looked up at her mother.
"I'm okay….really," she said this gently but meant it. Tears were in her mom's eyes and she nodded. "Get a grip mom," Grace laughed and Cherie echoed her.
"I just miss you." Cherie said.
"You're always welcome to come and stay. And I'll visit more," Grace promised. Cherie was satisfied with this and pulled her back into a hug, rocking her gently as the waves crashed off the shore. Grace was almost whole.