Delphine

Summer 2028

Delphine looks around the crowded house. It's as busy as she anticipated, but at least it's not hosted at her own home. Seven or eight different couples in their 30s and 40s, too much food and a pack of children running around and playing. This, Delphine decides, is absolute chaos. She's never really liked parties, especially not without Cosima in close proximity. She has no idea where her wife ended up. And maybe it doesn't matter for the moment. Somehow in the chaos of arriving at this clearly very gay BBQ she had managed to lose her wife. And she was not happy about it.

"So Delphine what do you do for a living?" Kate asks. Delphine looks over to the host, she wonders, not for the first time, how Cosima managed to meet these people and get invited. But she supposed it didn't matter. They're on this ridiculous deck at this house that was far more expensive than theirs. And the noise levels are nearly overwhelming.

"I do medical research, immunology and microbiomes for the government. Public health stuff." Delphine has long since learned to avoid specifics in large groups of parents. No sense offending near strangers she's just met. The fact her work is well-paid and increasingly in demand is always a plus. MD, PhD is nothing to scoff at.

Kate looks amused. "Wow you and Cosima are both so academic. I met my wife playing softball. Total lesbian cliché. Most of us met either lesbian softball or the Queer parents group."

"You?" Delphine asks politely, giving up on trying to find Cosima for the moment.

"I'm a teacher." Kate shrugs. "My wife Jen is a civil servant with the Ministry of Agriculture. Government work is like golden handcuffs, you know with the benefits." Kate looks around the group to a series of nods. That much, Delphine has realized, is true. Her work keeps them tethered here now. Leaving a job with that much security is foolish, and Delphine's tethered herself to it for their benefit, for now.

"You don't live far from us. I'm surprised we haven't met before." Erin pokes in. "Like Christie and I are sure our kids are in the same school district, but Elodie is in French school I guess? It's a shame she didn't meet Mila sooner, they're hitting it off. Hudson is close in age to your kids too..."

Delphne sighs. "Élodie is at Lycée Claudel. Lucien will start in September." That sets her apart from these women. More than not being Canadian or having a bit of an accent. Her privilege is what they'll see first now. She suspects a playdate is in their future, but she'll let Cosima handle it. Or at least that's her first plan. Having to get their house presentable for strangers is not her first priority.

Erin blinks at her, eyes widening. "Wow… isn't that the French international school? Like… I have a friend with her kids there but their dad works in international affairs and could get posted."

"Yes. Yes it is." Delphine answers, hoping to change the subject from how much her children's education is costing. It had been a hard sell for Cosima, but it was the decision they'd agreed to. To keep their family mobile, in case work they wanted opened up elsewhere. And maybe in a few years, they would. She'd always wanted them to spend a few years in France. If that was even possible.

"You met at the university of Toronto, right?" Amy asks. "You and Cosima? She mentioned that you were there for a while."

"Actually." Delphine lets out a small laugh. "When I first met Cosima, I was 18 years old. She was… 19. We were...teenagers." She smiles at the memory now, it no longer stung. She isn't sure exactly when that happened. Somewhere in the first few years together she thinks.

"Wow…" Liz pokes into the conversation, while balancing her toddler son on her hip. "I got to change this one. But I so want to hear this story. Cosima didn't tell me that!"

How much Cosima had already told these women was unknown, but Delphine figures controlling the narrative herself has some advantages. Especially with a couple details she'd rather keep quiet.

Delphine looks around. "We… hit it off, but it was years later before anything serious came of it. And I heard nothing from Cosima between 2007 and 2018."

"OK. I want to hear this story too." Kate laughs, running a hand through her short hair.

"There's not much to say. We had a very… intense and romantic summer. I went back to France heartbroken. And then years later I sign on to do a post-doc at University of Toronto… a few days into it, I walk in and there's Cosima." Delphine shakes her head slightly, there's no need to get into all the details. "Anyways… Cosima was… very intent on us getting reacquainted, within six months we were living together and here we are. Modern love story." Delphine waves a hand around. It had been inevitable, Delphine had decided after the fact. She always would have loved Cosima, have chosen Cosima. And she still does.

"And then you came to Ottawa?" Amy prompts. "Like you guys have been here a while… right?"

"Yes, I came first to do research in 2019, and split my time, and then 2020 hit." Delphine doesn't need to get into that mess. "Cosima quickly decided to come here to quarantine with me outside of the GTA… and this is… well, this is where we've stayed ultimately. We rented out our condo and then eventually sold it to buy here. And I managed a public health job in research…" Delphine shrugs. It was hard to deny that that job hadn't been extremely appealing or part of the decision. They'd stayed, and stability had come. More stability than she'd really been expecting so soon.

"Was Cosima the first woman you were with?" Kate looks her over curiously. "You said you were 18 when you met her."

"Cosima is the only woman I have been with. She... she is the love of my life." Delphine answers without shame. There's no point lying about that, especially not to a group of women Cosima is intently trying to befriend, maybe partially for the normalizing effect for their children. She didn't seek out queer spaces like Cosima had. She'd… figured they were more or less normal. And if being around other children with two mothers was important for her kids they'd work that out as they went. Cosima wanted this, she just wanted Cosima. Or so she'd thought. Normalizing, that was the truth of being at this event. They weren't the only two. It wasn't the two of them surrounded by men and women who didn't quite get it, not like this.

The group quiets in response but only for a moment, and Cosima reappears from inside the house as if cued, with Madeleine in the rainbow striped sling looking surprisingly alert for a Sunday around noon. A dusting of brown hair on her tiny head. Still too short to tell if it's curly, Delphine muses, observing her increasingly chubby youngest. She wasn't even three months old yet, Delphine wonders where the time has gone. Somehow it's raced through the newborn period yet again. Maybe because she'd been gone more? Had it dragged for Cosima? Should she have taken more leave herself?

"Hey Cosima. We were just talking about you." Erin waves to Cosima quickly and then notices her own child hitting another toddler with a stick. The woman jumps up and jogs halfway across the lawn to put a stop to it.

Delphine wonders then what Cosima would add to her rather truncated version of events but maybe it doesn't matter.

"Sorry. Had to do a diaper change." Cosima smiles. "What did I miss?" Cosima settles herself back comfortably into the nearest chair and adjusts her clothing to nurse Madeleine. Luckily, everyone seems fairly chill about it.

"Man after three kids, you just don't care anymore I guess." Amy looks over to Cosima who doesn't react. Cosima never was shy after all.

"Well… yeah. I guess babies were more addictive than we planned." Cosima laughs a little. "Delphine can you check on the kids…?"

"So Cosima, Delphine was telling us how you met… and met again I guess." Kate invites Cosima into the conversation.

And Delphine tunes out momentarily, she trusts Cosima won't purposefully embarrass her. Or spill their entire life story. And she needs to locate the other kids. "They are still fine, I have been glancing over. Even Lucien is playing well. He was almost three now, and intent on the sandbox for the moment. Élodie too is playing with a small group of kids, and seems happy enough. They are big enough to cry or wander over if they need mommy or maman now, Delphine tells herself. It's good for their independence. It is good for them to be here.

"I actually only birthed Madeleine." Cosima shrugs, her dreads streaked with greys now. It makes Delphine smile to witness this, another transformation. "It was wild, my first pregnancy, I already had two kids… but after watching Delphine have Lucien at home, I wanted to do it. Like the experience was part of why I wanted to try. But babies too… I mean I studied dev psych… so… yeah. Delphine was pretty surprised but we had two embryos leftover so why not. And here she is. And we are definitely done now. No more babies." Cosima points at her baby who has started humming into the breast as she nurses. Her sleepy noises, Cosima calls them.

"You birthed the first two?!" Lauren, Amy's wife pipes up. "They all kind of look… the same."

"They do." Delphine agrees, not seeing how that is any of their business how their children resemble both of them. Élodie appears, and leans over Delphine's arm for her attention. She has no intention of breaking out that story.

"Oui ma grande?" Delphine looks at her eldest. She sees Cosima, and herself, in the child's face. That is what she wanted. And what she got, after some convincing of both her brother and Cosima.

"Maman, j'ai faim." Her five-year-old states plainly.

"OK… On va manger." Delphine assures her, she looks to one of their hosts for help.

"There's some food already one the table." Jen offers. "Help yourself, Elodie."

Delphine gets up and helps Élodie get a plate of food, and then Lucien comes over, his hands filthy with sand. She grabs a wipe to clean her son's hands, and then looks around to see the BBQ is done, and guesses she is now the on parent. She manages the two of them, and gets them settled with food at a small plastic picnic table. A few other parents do the same. Chaos. Her life is controlled chaos, outside of her research, and for now - that is fine.

When she returns Cosima is laughing madly, engaged in animated conversation. With Madeleine peacefully asleep on her lap seemingly unbothered by either Cosima's voice or her emphatic gesturing.

"Do you want me to take her so you can eat?" Delphine offers, and scoops up the baby when Cosima nods. She doesn't bother with the sling, at least not now but she walks around, humming to her child under her breath. It's comforting, her baby's steady breaths, the way she snuggles in in sleep. It reminded her of the many hours spent holding the other two, of her own long maternity leaves and the joy and exhaustion of it all.

"You're Delphine, Cosima's wife, right? I recognize Madeleine." Another new friend approaches, a similarly sized baby strapped into a carrier on her front. "I'm Anna and this is Sage. I introduced Cosima to Jen. We met at a mom's group. We bonded over not having husbands." Anna jokes pleasantly and Delphine nods at her. The names are familiar, Cosima has mentioned these two a few times. Maybe Cosima was right about community, it had certainly felt awkward to be the only woman at the baby group with a wife. Maybe this was better for all of them.

"Yes. I am Cosima's wife. And this is Madeleine. Élodie and Lucien are ours too." Delphine subs in helpfully. She points at her children, all with brown curly hair and dark eyes. Of course, this stranger knows her children already, and it's her that was missing from her picture of the Niehaus-Cormier family.

And it's true, Delphine finds herself smiling. She is Cosima's. And she is glad of it.