AN: Thanks as always for reading and reviewing!

"Dyad's Blessing, Dyad's Curse"

By EsmeAmelia

Chapter 28

Step, step, step.

Ben still gripped the parallel bars during walking practice like they were a lifeline, even though his legs were getting stronger. Almost normal – but in his case, that wasn't a desirable thing. Recovering meant he'd go straight from the hospital to prison, after all.

"Ben, I think you might be ready to try to walk on your own."

"I don't think so," Ben said a little too hastily, which Doctor Renda seemed to notice.

"Ben," she said, "are you saying that because you really don't feel ready to walk or because you're afraid of leaving here?"

"Does it matter?" asked Ben, looking down at his bare feet with the blue veins snaking along the skin. "You can't legally force me to do anything I don't want to do."

"True," said Renda, "but we also can't legally keep a healthy patient in a room that could go to a sick patient."

Ben sighed. "Well I am sick. Healthy people don't murder their parents. Healthy people don't torture prisoners for information. Healthy people don't violate people's minds. Healthy people don't order entire villages destroyed – should I go on?" His mind's eye saw his father's face, causing him to grip the bars tightly enough to whiten his knuckles.

"Ben, I understand . . ."

"No, you don't!" Ben's head snapped up to glare at her. "You're in the same room as someone who murdered his father! Doesn't that bother you? Don't you wish you could just get out that concealed stunray and shut me up?"

"Ben, I'm here to help you."

"Then the least you could do is be honest and stop acting like you're perfectly fine with having Kylo Ren as a patient!"

Now she actually looked angry. Were doctors even allowed to get angry at their patients? He couldn't say he knew for sure, but now her lips were quivering and her eyes were narrowing, which was almost a relief. It meant the Twi'lek doctor might actually have a side beyond wanting to help him no matter what.

"You want me to be honest?" she said in a low voice. "All right, I'll be honest. When you first came here, yes, I was scared. I was ready to stun you at a moment's notice, but the more I got to know you, the less I feared you." She swallowed, glancing at her datapad as if unable to look him in the eye. "And you remind me of my daughter."

"Wait, what?"

She looked back up at him. "Strictly speaking, I'm not supposed to share personal stories with my patients, but maybe this will help you. My daughter – she's sixteen and she's in jail. Well, technically juvenile hall, but it's as good as jail. She's been part of a . . . a gang for the last two years or so."

Ben felt like he had been punched in the stomach. "Why?"

Renda inhaled as if trying to keep herself from crying. "I don't know. Maybe because her father left before she was born and wants nothing to do with her – we've both tried contacting him and he never responds. Maybe because I have to work such long hours, or maybe it's a combination, but when I visit her I keep telling her that it's not too late to turn her life around when she gets out. I have to believe that she still has a future." She wiped a hand over her eyes. "We can't change what we did – I can't, you can't, she can't, but there's always a tomorrow. I want to help both you and her to realize that."

Ben couldn't speak. The cheek where Han had touched him suddenly felt numb. A dying father, felled by his own son's hand . . . yet he still used his last moments to show that he believed in tomorrow. His eyes squeezed shut in a vain attempt to keep tears in. Both his dead parents in his subconscious's wilderness, still believing in tomorrow even after everything he'd done . . .

"Ben? Are you all right?"

Ben opened his eyes, the doctor's face little more than a large green blur through his tears. "I'm sorry," he said, unable to think of anything else. He sniffled, wiping his eyes on his hospital gown's sleeve, though the tears kept coming. "I hope she can find her tomorrow even if I can't."

"You can. In fact, you can start by learning to walk again."

Again he gazed down at his feet. "I'm still walking to prison."

. . .

Rey sat at the edge of the indoor hotel pool, savoring the smell of chlorine, her pants pulled up to her knees, her bare feet soaking in the cool water. She gazed out at the various children and their parents playing in the water, splashing each other, older children showing off how they could swim and parents holding younger children up. So normal.

"Rey?"

Rey looked up and there was Finn towering over her, barefoot but otherwise dressed, a swimsuit and towel dangling over his shoulder. "Rey, are you all right?"

"I'm fine."

"You wanna go swimming together?"

"I don't know how to swim." She went back to gazing out at the pool. "Maybe my parents taught me before they left me on Jakku, but I don't remember if they did."

Now Finn was rolling up his own pants. After placing his swimsuit and towel on the floor, he eased himself into a sitting position next to Rey, sticking his own feet into the water. "I could teach you to swim if you wanted."

"I don't know," said Rey, glancing at her hand. What if lightning shot out of her hand here, killing all the innocent souls in the pool? Maybe she should stay away from water . . . but that wouldn't stop her from losing control on land.

"Rey?" Finn repeated. "Are you sure you're all right?"

Rey took a deep breath. "Have I been all right at all lately? I found out I'm Palpatine's granddaughter, I almost killed Chewie and I could lose control again, I'm trapped in a dyad I can't control, Ben and I are dreaming of each other's memories – no, I'm not all right, but you can't fix it!"

Finn's eyes bulged as he gave an audible gulp. "You're right," he said in a low voice, "I can't fix it, but I wish I could fix it." His eyes shifted a bit. "Uh . . . is he here, you know, right now?"

"No, but that doesn't mean he couldn't appear at any moment."

"Damn," said Finn, "you . . . really don't have any privacy at all, do you? That must be hell."

Rey slowly kicked her feet back and forth in the water, her toes peeking through the surface before going back under. "Sometimes it is hell, but sometimes . . . it's not."

"How is it not?"

How could Rey explain it when she couldn't understand it herself? "You're not alone" – Ben's words from so long ago echoed in her mind. That night when they'd touched hands, when she'd felt light within him . . .

"There are times . . ." She fumbled for words. ". . . times when it feels right."