Mai
"If Uesugi deployed his Nokizaru, he's possibly ready to launch a full-on attack under our noses." Hideyoshi insistently pinpoints north of the map everyone's gathered around on, onto the forest patch that'd been affected. "We shouldn't be fooled by merely a group of ninja. If they deem the northern forest as a way into the city, then that's all it takes for them to go on."
It takes some time for Mai to get used to the constant stream of orders and recommendations the commanders in the room throw at each other, but she manages not to get lost in the process. All the men seem to be pretty accustomed to each train of thought, and it's actually quite nice seeing them work as a group, not stepping over each other or dismissing someone else's opinions on the subject.
A tad bit chaotic, that's for sure, but normal nonetheless. She can deal with normalcy. In fact, she's been craving for some of that for a week.
The debate stops abruptly though, as Hideyoshi turns on his back, looking as if he just realized something. "And where's Masamune to give his report? Late again?"
Her heart lurches to her throat, not helping with holding her breath. Oh no. Please don't say it...
It's Mitsunari who replies. "Lord Masamune is tending to his men. Apparently he was there during the attack."
Oh no, no, no…
Mai's hands fly to her mouth, a rush of emotions coursing through her. The meeting has been going for half an hour but, in truth, she'd convinced herself he'd come through the shoji doors anytime, late as usual.
That everything went back to normal in her absence.
A part of her is sure he's as alright as he can be, being a veteran samurai and all, yet another can't help but submerge into the worst case scenarios. What if he's injured and bleeding out in a room right now? What if he's gotten another scar to mar his body?
What if he's not fine at all?
Through the corner of her eye, she notices Mitsuhide arching a brow at her, but a second later his expression is gone. "According to the intel we got from some of our prisoners, Uesugi and Takeda have managed to rally their vassals and have amassed a sizable army by now." He informs the group of men, "This leaves us not only with the looming threats of capturing the Oda Princess here but also with a likely soon strike with a full-on force."
Nobunaga tilts his head in her direction, for the first time acknowledging her presence in the meeting, but looks utterly impassive by the news. "So be it." He says plainly, "I imagine no one here finds these news intimidating."
Well, I do! He just said I'm one of the reasons they've got their eyes on us!
She looks around at the others, yet no one seems to have her same stance. While everyone takes everything quite seriously, there's not an ounce of fear in the room—everyone prepared to fight. The words 'conviction', 'ideals' and 'principles' surface in her mind, appearing to follow her everywhere she goes.
If Masamune got injured because of me, I don't know if I would be able to forgive myself...
"Mitsuhide, gather what information you can about the enemy's military strength. See what allies you can call in." Nobunaga commands, "Mitsunari, take charge of logistics, calculate our provisions, distribution of armaments and deployment."
"Yes, my Lord."
"Hideyoshi, let Masamune's main vassal know his Lord and them are to take charge of Mai's watch and protection, and that I shall provide the resources needed."
"Uh…" She begins, though closes her mouth after that. Not like her opinion would actually change anything.
Keeping her silence, she watches as Nobunaga keeps delivering orders to and fro. Meanwhile, Masamune's advice keeps leaping to the forefront of her mind.
"You need something to believe in, something to kill for, and something to die for."
Mitsuhide turns to her in a good timing to cut off that train of thought. "Mai, I'm sure any help on taking care of the wounded this morning would be appreciated."
She can't help gulping, but nodding all the same, getting a feeling why Mitsuhide is goading her on to get on the move. Still, she's not so sure she's ready to face him on that precise moment, with her emotions in a turmoil.
"I informed them you'd be arriving with fresh bandages, salve and something for pain. Doubles as a disinfectant." He approaches where she sits, lying a heavy hand on her shoulder. "You don't want to keep them waiting."
The rest of the men begin to spread, gathering their parchments and maps, but Mitsuhide's eyes remain on her, expectant, as if waiting for her to collect herself. In truth, all Mai wants is to run back to her room and hide from the world for a little longer, but her rational mind knows it's obvious she can't prolong the inevitable.
Forcing the tight fists on her lap to relax, she takes a deep breath, swallowing down her feelings.
"Okay. I'm going right away."
With her hands full on a tray carrying fresh supplies, she makes a stop before the room where the injured soldiers are being treated, looking like an infirmary. The groans tell me this is the place. How awful.
Something on her insides makes a flip at the fact of Masamune being inside, but she swallows it down again, forcing herself to get a grip of her anxieties.
He could be injured too for all it takes. I need to get a grip on myself. He's not the only one that might need all these bandages.
Sliding open the shoji door, she steps inside. The injured, and several attendants treating them seem to be scattered about the room, making it as miserable as it sounded outside. Once she regains control of her breathing and settles her nerves, she speaks with a clear voice.
"I've come with supplies. Does anyone need any assistance?" She's still no medic, but figures Ieyasu's past lessons should be giving her an advantage right about now. Besides, it's not like she was planning to stay just watching.
For a moment, nobody replies. Until someone notices her.
"Mai…"
At the far corner, his voice drifts to her ears past the groans and moans from the inhabitants, her breath coming to a stop. It's been a week since she last saw his face, though she couldn't have possibly forgotten it even if years go by. He's sitting beside Yojiro, the young and eager scout she'd met in the forest, and once she notices his posture, a huge wave of relief washes over her, untensing her shoulders and arms.
He's fine! He's actually not lying down! Oh, thank goodness…
Almost a minute goes by—or it could be hours—rooted in her place and just staring at him, knowing she should approach and say something and move and at least say hello but there's just something gripping her thighs and pressing her chest. It's his eye, actually; intense, fixed on her, calculating her every move, every hitch of her breath.
"Nng…" At Yojiro's groan of pain, Masamune finally tears his eye away from her, breaking the spell.
Just go, goddammit!
She manages to take one step further. "Here. Let me help you."
"Thanks." Masamune says, somewhat detached, but he seems to release a breath he'd apparently been holding when she approaches the pair.
Controlling her suddenly trembling hands, she sets the tray of supplies down in the middle of the room and sits beside him, facing the wounded scout. His presence nearby nearly overwhelms her, but of all the possible times to start freaking out, now's definitely not the right time, with someone else needing her help.
"Princess, you're here—oww!" The boy looks amazed for her presence but moving to face her proves difficult in the moment.
"It only hurts because you moved it." Masamune scowls.
"Lord Masamune... you could be a little less rough." The scout tries to plead with him.
"Shut it. And hold still this time." He resumes cleaning Yojiro's injury, which seems to be a long gash in his arm up to his shoulder.
Their usual bickering at least puts her conflicted mind a little bit at rest. It's normal, everything's coming back to normal, even if slowly. She holds onto it like a lifeline, her eyes inevitably following Masamune's hands, watching his work. He's tending to his own men. Any other man in his position would pass the job to someone else, maybe someone gentler?
She notices she's staring though, which realizes it's not truly polite, and clears her throat. "Can I help with something?"
"Yeah. Pass me the salve."
"Sure."
Reaching onto the tray of supplies, she grabs the jar and passes it to him. But she notices quite late how shaky his arm is, and pulling away before he has a good grip causes the jar to land on the floor.
"Oops! Let me."
"Nah, I got it." He says quickly to the tatami floor, for some reason not looking at her, bending over to pick the jar before she has the chance.
Something about the way he reacts makes her watch him with an odd feeling, alarms starting to flare on her head once again; and it's right there, when he stretches his arm, an almost imperceptible wince crossing his face. It's not my imagination. He's in pain. At simple view he doesn't look injured, but he gave something away just for a second there.
With the salve in hand and seemingly opting to keep avoiding her suspicious gaze, Masamune returns to Yojiro. Without a word, she assists the pair as well, holding up Yojiro's arm yet intent on glancing at him from the corner of her eye, determined to look for more signs. He doesn't get upset when Mai stretches back and takes it upon herself to bandage the boy, trying her best to be as gentle as she can manage.
"Alright, you're all patched up." Masamune says, satisfied, as she finishes.
"Thank you, my Lord, Princess." Yojiro smiles, looking grateful.
A small snort leaves Masamune, shaking his head. "You're always leaving your left side open. Maybe i'll give you one of my eyepatches, teach you to watch yourself better."
Yojiro makes an effort to sit straighter. "Haha, no thanks. But thank you for protecting me, my Lord. I'd be in much worse shape without you."
"Just my way to pay you back for all your hard work, lad."
Her eyes fall to the tatami floor, quite touched by the situation. He cares so much about his subordinates. It's really hard to imagine a man like this so nonchalant about killing people…
Masamune stands up, pushing himself off the ground with his right arm. It's such an obvious gesture now that she's truly seen him before, it's impossible to ignore it now. He really hurt himself.
There's a chance he's already gotten his arm treated, though, and she's just worried about something already done. Yet her instinct and recollections of Masamune's character are stronger, insistent that he most likely intends to have himself at the very last place for treatment, prioritizing everyone else instead.
In reality, she's not so sure she should do something, not with the very awkward place they are with one another. On the other hand, she wants to chastise herself for, after a whole week isolated in her room, still not feeling ready to fully face him.
However, how and when is she going to change that if not now?
Anxious Mai, begone. I'm done with your crap. I'm going to do things my way now.
Standing up and setting her head straight, she follows after him without hesitation before he has the chance to leave her behind and disappear.
"Masamune, can I have a second?"
He turns slowly, somewhat not expecting to find her facing him, if the brief look of surprise on his face is of any indication. "Sure. What is it?"
"Can I see your ar—MMPH!"
His eye goes wide and in the next second, he closes the tense distance between them, abruptly throwing his arm around her and covering her mouth with his right hand. Her heart lurches to her throat, but she's positive it's not for his unpredictable action.
What!? I was just going to ASK!
A couple of chuckles reach the two of them. "Looks like Lord Masamune and the Princess are back at it again!"
"Those two are so sweet together!"
"Go for it, Princess!"
A deep blush creeps up her face, below Masamune's hand. Is clapping a hand over someone's mouth a sign of affection in this era? At least it's not just Masamune, everyone's got really bizarre ideas on relationships.
Not like she has a say on the matter as he pulls her along to an empty room, ignoring the teasing jabs of his men. "Ssh. Here."
The moment he closes the shoji doors and they're left alone, he lets go of her mouth in an instant, standing at arm's length yet courteous enough not to keep invading her personal space. The action feels wrong and right at the same time.
"Don't do that, please. Next time, a simple 'shh' will work." A tinge of hurt leaves her voice before she can help it, bringing her to cast her eyes anywhere but at him.
"I didn't want them to know."
"About what?"
"About my injury?"
Right. I can't believe I almost forgot. Being really stupid here, Mai.
Her blush and embarrassment goes out the window as Masamune pushes up his sleeve, revealing a nasty gash from his elbow to his left hand, patches of dry blood and bruises covering it. The mere sight is enough to set her scattered mind and emotions on the right track, her eyes widening.
"Why were you hiding that?" Mai can't help but exclaim, nearly shocked. "You shouldn't have been helping, you should have been getting treated yourself…"
Masamune sighs deeply, as if knowing she'd react like that, shaking his head tiredly. "Yojiro doesn't look like it, but he's a worrier. If he knew I got injured protecting him, what do you think he'd do next time we were in a fight?"
She ponders over that for a second, a tad bit lost for being thrown that question just now. "Are you saying he might risk himself to protect you?"
"Exactly. And by looking out for me instead of himself, he'll get killed." His face hardens with a frown. "He'd be wasting his life for nothing..."
She tilts her head back at that statement, blinking in confusion. Wasting his life for nothing. Trying to combine those words with everything he'd said at the inn, it's clear it reads as the complete opposite.
A beat. "Is… that what you really think?" She tries for another way to put it, but fails to do so.
"What?" He tilts his head back, mimicking her confusion, "Of course I do."
Their eyes fix on one another, trying to search past them, and she does her best trying to read his thoughts, but—expectedly—comes out with nothing.
"You think dying is a waste." She deadpans. "Then why is it so natural to kill or die for the sake of your convictions?"
His frown changes and deepens into a worse one. "Those are two separate things!" He points out, growing defensive. "I'd never let my subordinates die for something as pointless as trying to make up for a blunder they once made."
Though his words are rough, his expression shifts to one of concern, apparently noticing his increased tone of voice. At least he's not so cold blooded as he sometimes sounds. But that leaves her pondering; what truly is his ideal? Why does he cherish more than the lives of his subordinates?
He keeps staring intently at her, as if looking for something in her eyes, but a moment later he sighs, shaking his head and walking a step away. "Since no one is around, guess I'll take the opportunity to patch this up." He then adds curtly, "You don't have to look."
A part of her does want to, but in reality, not because of his awful injury, but to get a grip of herself before lashing out something she shouldn't or is in no place to. Yet she can't help it, her gaze drifting away from his face and to his arm as he slips his arm out of his sleeve, revealing part of his chest. His wound looks as deep as Yojiro's, though more painful for some reason, and she can't wrap her head on how he's left it untreated for so long.
Doesn't he have a single care about his wellbeing? Something about that thought makes her very upset.
Without minding her, Masamune reaches for the disinfectant, keeping his arm aloft. Her tongue moves before her brain registers what she's saying. "You're going to have a hard time doing that one handed. Let me help."
"Thanks, but I don't need it. I patch myself up all the time." He dismisses her calmly, not in an offending way, simply stating a fact.
"But I'm here now. Just let me." She insists, taking a step closer and simply ignoring those defensive walls he's put on himself, knowing deep down one of them has to in the end.
He threatens to kill me, and I'm here treating him. Shows what I know, though.
Following her own knowledge of first aid and some of what Ieyasu taught her, she gently grabs his wrist and pours some disinfectant sake on the wound with a rag, grimacing in anticipation of how much it would hurt.
"Is it painful?" She asks, not looking up from his arm. But instead of tensing, his body and face seem to soften, holding up his arm for her.
"No." He replies quietly, "It looks painful for you though."
She arches a brow and looks at his face fleetingly, and Masamune shoots her a roguish smile, the first time he smiles after so long. The tense and awkward air around them seems to dissolve at that, allowing her to relax her shoulders and, for the briefest of moments, just simply enjoy their unspoken impasse.
His smile does lots of things on her insides, her memories bringing forth the feeling of his lips against hers, but she snorts back and—miraculously—manages to succeed in not smiling back like a goof, leaving his arm like that and going back to place salve on the wound.
Forcing her gaze away from his face, his arm looks buff and toned, scars of old mapping it, making her purse her lips. He looks so young to have been in so many battles. Without helping it, she finds herself tracing them delicately with a fingertip, something hot and painful welling up inside her.
"Masamune?" She whispers softly, unable to pry her eyes away from his old marks, from the proof of those past experiences lying before her.
He's younger than her, and while she's aware they're in the 1500s, there's something so hurtful and unfair on those scars.
He shouldn't have gone through all this at his age… no one should.
"Yes?" He replies in the same low voice as her, as if mindful of not breaking the spell that seems to be surrounding them.
"Just… thank you for carrying me back to Azuchi." She swallows. "You know, when I collapsed with a cold."
There's so much more she wants to tell him at that moment, so many doubts that'd been nagging at her for the past week, but that at least seems like the right thing to say right now. "Honestly... you scared me that night. A lot. And the things you said really upset me." With a lot of effort, she returns to face him and meet his eye, boring into her. "I don't understand you… but I want to. I know you've got a reason for fighting, and I want to know what that is."
They're so different in so many aspects, but as she stares back to him she's more than aware that, still, there's something that draws them together, and it's not just a physical and sexual attraction. There's another sort of chemistry that can't possibly resume to just that, and reflecting on it, it's worth enough to struggle to get to know him more and leave her stubbornness aside.
"I actually think Masamune… is good for you."
The small quirk of his lips turns softer, more tender, understanding. "I feel the same..." He admits, his voice turning to that strange, attractive power he's known to have. "I want to know more about you too."
Her lips part and a soft breath leaves her as his other hand lies upon hers, "The things you say… really rattle me. I don't know at all where your ideas come from, or how they make sense to you. We're from an entirely different time after all," He tilts his head at that, "But when I threatened to break them, you started to cry. And I'd rather see you happy than crying."
As if on cue, Masamune's hand drifts from hers to cup her cheek, her heart doing a full flip. The way he looks at her now, soft and open and honest, makes something tug harder inside her. Because that's the real face of Date Masamune—the man, not the samurai. The friend, not the enemy.
And because that's the face of the man she's aware now, after a week of denial, she's falling in love with.
With both their walls fully down for the other to reach through, he then switches, smiling that cheeky, roguish smile that's so him, the palm of his hand more firm and sure against her face, as if noticing she's not going to shun his touch, at least for the time being.
"If you're not smiling, it's hard to kiss you..."
And just with that, they're back at the beginning. A good one, though. Familiar.
Normal.
As much as a huge part of her wants to smile just to see if he'd go through what he said, in the end Mai can't help but dissolve in a fit of snorts and laughter, taking a small step away. Her laugh is a mix of genuine relief, irony and amusement.
Pursing her lips in fake complaint, she says, half joking and half serious, "You'd kiss the same girl you threatened to kill?"
His smirk falters slightly. "... Is that weird?"
"Well, yeah!" After giving it a bit of thought, she adds, "At least I find that weird."
Finally, Masamune grows serious. "It's not for me at all. It's a reality of my life."
Considering his nature of fully living the moment, it doesn't read as a crazy statement and his words carry some sense after all. However, and just like her, looking unwilling to break the nice moment they're having, Masamune is then the one to take a step further now, taking the hand still resting in his injured arm and tenderly bringing it to his lips, kissing the back of it gently.
It's just a kiss on her hand, but the simple action feels like carrying a lot of emotions with it, mostly as if he doesn't want her to shy away from him now that she's here at arms reach. Also, it feels like asking for patience, as well as showing respect for her.
"Guess we really need to understand each other better..." He says in an admitting tone, brushing his lips over the tip of her fingers.
She signs deeply at that, in part unequivocally agreeing, and also not helping with finally and fully deflate, growing tired of arguing about anything else. Their current mood and air between them is much more comfortable and pleasing than to break it again.
In the end they do part though, but don't stay apart for long as Mai resumes her work and goes back to bandage his arm, feeling much more at ease now. Masamune's eye keeps fixed on her face, shameless to show where his full attention is going to, holding still for her, his other hand going to tuck a lock of her hair behind her ear.
Another snort escapes her, noticing he really can't stop trying to touch her. Although she finds not an ounce of will to stop him from doing so—in fact, all her willpower goes to not lean into his touch, and don't touch him back as much as strictly necessary.
"I just had an idea," Masamune says, "Mai, are you free tomorrow night?"
"That depends." She quirks a curious brow.
"Take it as an opportunity to get to know me."
Finishing her work, Mai lets go of his arm and tilts her head to meet his face. "And can't you just tell me now? I just want to know what you're fighting for." Naturally, there are several other questions in her mind, but she can't help pushing a little for at least one answer to them right now.
But Masamune doesn't seem to give much thought into it. "If you want an answer now, I can only tell you it's just so I stay me. But if you want the long answer, come see me tomorrow night."
A smirk returns to his face, slowly leaning closer to hers, and her heart flips in excitement, the pounding in her ears feeling like wanting her to believe he's about to kiss her. Her entire thoughts go out the window and the lids of her eyes grow heavy, no longer caring about fighting her most simple and obvious desires.
Besides, who is she lying to? She wants him to kiss her. To hell with what ifs and any other sense of rationality. She wants it so badly she doesn't dare even breathe. Losing the fight with her eyelids, they close and her lips part, all her senses focusing on the soft breath that fans over her mouth, skin flushing with goosebumps.
The side of her face burns as Masamune brushes it with his lips, not going where she really likes to, but to whisper in her ear, voice husky and hot.
"I'll show you with actions, not with words."
A-N: I know. I KNOW. I'm taking my sweet time here. Though believe me when I say things are going to diverge a lot from canon from now on.
A couple of quite exciting chapters coming ahead, thanks for still staying tuned and for being so patient!