CHAPTER 29
"A Cosmo, please." Sam pouts her lips at Alex.
"You've had six shots and now you want a Cosmo, babe what are you going through?"
"Life has been tough, Alex" Sam say lazily. No big deal. Just a lightweight drinking her emotions away. Alex gives her a worrisome look. Her lips force a smile.
"I'm fine" Her voice lacks any trace of strength making it harder to convince him.
"Spill" Alex pours her cocktail into a glass before placing it in front of her. She takes a sip, enjoying the taste.
"Mm. Cointreau?" Sam asks.
"Yes ma'am. Now, spill" Alex glares at her until she caves in.
"Savannah is pregnant and there is a possibility that my boyfriend could be the father" Sam takes another sip of her drink. Waiting for it to hit her any moment now.
"Wait what? Buck slept with Savannah? I thought she was sleeping with Tyler?" Alex replied
"She was" Sam says
"So how did Buck end up being a candidate?" Alex asks
"Apparently Savannah is positive it's Buck." Sam replied
"Did you ask him about this?"
"I did. He told me they didn't sleep together." Sam continues
"I'm lost babe" Alex says
"Victor had the pleasure of telling me about Savannah reminiscing on their night together." Sam shrugs.
"And I didn't believe any of it until Victor mentioned a box full of photos that only two people have seen that sits on Buck's nightstand, on the right side of his bed. Which means Savannah has been to his place..." She stares off to the bottles behind Alex, replaying last night in her head. How everything was fine last night and now, it all went to shit.
"But that doesn't mean she slept with him. So, she went to his place. Maybe she went over but nothing happened" Alex tries to make it better but it doesn't work.
"I doubt that. It was the night of the gala according to Victor. They were very touchy with each other that night now that I think about it... he probably did take her home and slept with her." Sam says
"Why would he lie?" Alex asks
"Because maybe he knew I wouldn't have given him a chance. To be honest, I don't think I would have" Sam replied
"But Samantha... this happened when you two weren't even together... you can't be mad at him for sleeping with whoever before you. That's probably not what you want to hear but think of it this way. What if you had slept with Victor before you and Buck got together. Do you think he wouldn't have given you a chance just because you slept with someone? While you were single?" Alex says
"I wouldn't have got pregnant with Victor. And I would've told Evan the truth, not hide it from him and also... what if it is his baby? Then what? I want to be with Evan but I just don't know how I feel watching the person I love become a father to his first child with a person who I do not get along with. And I don't want that for him, where his baby momma and girlfriend don't get along. I can't do it" She cover her face with her hands.
"That's you being selfish, Samantha."'
'Ouch.' Sam thought
"You don't leave someone you love because it gets a little bumpy. You'd be there for Evan and support him. Yes, he lied and give him hell for that but are you wanting to lose him because of something he did before you two got together?" Alex says
Sam understands what Alex is trying to say but at the same time it isn't easy. She doesn't know how to feel if this is his baby. Maybe she is being selfish but she can't help but feel hurt. Things would've been different if he had just been open with her. But he wasn't and that is what upsets her.
"I get your view Alex; I do and I adore you but you have to understand that it also sucks. This suck. I love him and I might sound selfish with this situation but at the same time you have to see why this would upset me." Sam replied
Alex nods. "I do, babe. Maybe you should go sleep on it. I'll call you an Uber"
SAMS P.O.V.
I fumble across my living room, throwing my coat off and tossing it over to the couch. I grab my phone out of my back pocket. 5 missed calls from Evan. Great. I feel bad for ignoring his calls but I need time to think.
My feet are killing me.
I pull one shoe off, toss it. Next shoe off, toss it. It's still dark in my house but I don't feel like turning any lights on. Darkness is my friend for right now.
My body tenses up when there's a loud knock at the door. Slowly I take small steps towards my door, holding my breath the entire time.
Relief washes over me when I peep through the small hole and see Evan on the other side. I open the door in no hurry.
"Are you okay? You haven't answered any of my calls?" He seems out of breath. Before I can answer him, he strides past me.
"Why is it so dark in here?" He asks me. The thoughts creep back into my head when I turn around and face him. I can't control myself.
"You lied to me" My voice cracks. The alcohol is definitely taking over. Despite the lack of visibility, I can see his features tense up.
"What?" Buck asks confused
"You. Lied. To me" I repeat myself, this time slower
"Sam, what are you talking about?" He inches closer to me, eyes wild. I shake my head and take a few steps back.
"You told me you didn't sleep with Savannah. That was a lie" I says
"Samantha"
"How does she know about the small box you have on your nightstand?"
"Babe please"
"Tell me what really happened, Evan. On the night of the gala" I demand.
"I-I... I don't remember" is all he says.
"You don't remember... how do you not remember?" I ask
"Because I was shit faced! I was mad, it wasn't easy seeing you with that asshole" Buck says
"He might've been an asshole to you but at least he isn't a liar" I snap. I immediately regret talking to him like that but my emotions are all over the place hard to control.
"Baby, I swear I don't remember sleeping with her" his hands are around my arms. I try pushing him away but he doesn't let me go.
"So that makes it better? That you don't remember. That means you could've slept with her and she's probably carrying-" I can't finish my sentence.
"No no, Samantha please. I'm sorry I didn't tell you the whole truth but there's no way this is my baby. The night of the gala was the only night she was at my place"
"And one night is all it takes, Evan. If you would've told me the truth then I wouldn't be this upset but you lied to me. You lied and that hurts me..." A tear falls down my cheek. I hate crying when I'm drunk.
I feel his warm palms cup my cheeks, wiping away the tears. I'm so angry. I don't want to be but one thing I hate is being lied to. Especially if it's someone I thought I could trust.
"I swear I never meant to hurt you Stella but we can get past this. I don't think it's mine, I don't think anything happened that night"
"Evan you're really not making this any better"
"Tell me what I have to do, baby please. I hate seeing you this way and I hate myself for not being honest"
I grab his palms and bring his hands down back to his side. I take a deep breathe in.
"I don't know. I can't think Evan. We won't know who the father is until the baby is born and I don't know. I am so confused right now."
"I can't lose you, Stella. You bring out the best of me and I love who I am when you're around..." his voice is quiet.
The tears won't stop rolling down my cheeks. Dammit.
"Evan, I love you. I came here looking for a new life, I wasn't looking for love but I found you, you are by far the greatest things that has happened to me since I moved to L.A. Because of you I know what it's like to let someone in and be loved. You gave me such a beautiful gift but you also hurt me with a simple lie and right now I. Can't. Think."
"Please. Don't" Evan reaches for me but I turn him away. I love him so much but I can't be with him right now.
"Baby... please, we can make it through this. We don't know anything is for sure. We can take it day by day, and when the day comes-" Buck says
"I can't" my voice is weak.
"I can't do it. Evan, what are we going to do if this is your baby? What do you expect me to do? I want to tell myself we'll be fine and I can still be there even if you have to raise a child with Savannah for the next 18 years. Because I love you Evan, so much but I'm scared. I'm scared of the possible truth. This situation... I don't know how to handle it Evan. I don't know how I'll feel about everything in 7 months from now" I says
"But I do. Seven months from now I'll still be in love with you. And because I love you, I want you to be by my side if this really did happen... If I did. Sam, I need you." Buck says
"And I need you to understand that I need time." I replied
"What do you mean?" Evan reaches out to me again and this time I don't pull away. Instead, I stand still.
"I mean that I need time to myself... I want to be with you but maybe it's best we take time apart until you know..."
"You want to break up?" I don't answer him. Because I don't want too but I need to be alone. Maybe I'm taking this too far. He wants to work through this but none of this is easy for me.
"I thought you would stay by my side... I understand I messed up by lying to you but I'm telling you we can get through this. But I love you and I'll respect your wishes then."
Am I doing the right thing? Everything is so cloudy in my mind.
"I'm sorry Evan. And NO. I'm not breaking up with you. I just need some time to think I am so confused right now . I just want to be alone not around you. I'm sorry " I take his face in my hands. "But just remember one thing..."
"And that is."
Before saying it I give him one last kiss. I know it's not our last kiss, I hope it's not, but the last one for now. Until I know the truth. Because I can't live with the fact that this baby could be his.
"I love you" I tell him.
"I love you."