Daisy reappeared in a puff of smoke, coughing, dizzy, and confused. She waved away the dark vapor to find herself in a backstage dressing room. Racks of costumes and robes lined the walls alongside stacks of audio equipment. An assortment of pastries were laid out on a catering table next to a couple corked bottles of chuckola chilling in a bucket of ice.
"Help yourself to anything you like."
Daisy's blood ran cold as she turned to spot Mouser, Tryclyde, Clawgrip, and Fryguy sitting on sofas on either side of her. They looked battered, peppered with bruises and bandaged, with the exception of Fry Guy who appeared to be burning on a low heat. The four of them scowled, sour and silent, and avoided eye contact with her.
In-between was Wart. He sat away from them, facing a star shaped vanity mirror lined with lights. The bloated frog was dabbing his rubbery face with a delicate make up brush. He looked at Daisy's reflection and smiled.
"Have a seat, princess. We have a little time before the show starts." Wart turned his head to admire his handiwork. "I want to congratulate you for getting past the first round of auditions."
Daisy kept still and tried to scan for an exit without being too obvious. "What's going on?" she said. "Where's Waluigi?"
"Oh. The purple guy?" Wart said. "I suppose we can check in on him."
He snapped his fingers and a rectangular silhouette appeared in midair. It crackled to life and displayed security footage of outside the palace. The screen tracked the Skypop as it entered a nosedive. Waluigi had climbed into the pilot's seat and was trying to pull up. Daisy stiffened as she watched, unable to help. It was no good. Waluigi steered away from the castle and aimed for a long stretch of cloud to land. The Sky Pop lurched, threatening to tip sideways. It touched down and the right wing clipped into solid cloud. Bits of metal snapped off as the wing was torn up by friction and ground down to the nub. Waluigi bailed out as the plane reached the edge of the cloud and the Sky Pop toppled right over the edge. Her mom's favorite plane exploded against the peak of a mountaintop below.
But Waluigi survived. He stood up to dust the cloud from his overalls. Daisy exhaled in relief.
"There, see?" Wart said. "He's fine. Now you don't have to be distracted."
He flicked his wrist and the screen blipped out of existence. Wart swiveled his chair to face her.
"You've caused me a lot of trouble, you know that? I figured Mario would be the biggest thing to stand in my way, but instead my biggest problem is a meddling couple of rogue athletes!"
"I'll take that as a compliment," Daisy said.
"See, I like that," Wart said. "You've got moxie, princess. Character. I dare say even Star Potential. That's why I'd like to offer you an opportunity."
Mouser looked up with clenched teeth. "She's not worth it, boss. This lady is bad news."
"Hey! Who's the producer here, you or me?" Wart said. "I call the shots here! You let me handle this."
"Yar," Clawgrip mumbled. "Ye be better off pitching her into Subspace to be rid of her."
"I might've considered that if a certain pack of clowns hadn't let her get ahold of ALL the dream gems," he said. "Listen, I'm not mad: just disappointed. She and the other guy are protected against my best spells now. Which means I need to get creative. But that's fine. You gotta be flexible if you want to work in Show Business. What I'm thinking is that if this lady is trouble, then I want her working for US."
"You think I'm going to JOIN you?!" Daisy said. "After you wrecked my whole kingdom!?"
"Listen, I know things got a bit heated earlier. It was very unprofessional. A bad look. Sleepnapping—sorry, dreamnapping everyone in Sarasaland does NOT help my pitch here, I admit that. But hey! You look like you needed a vacation anyway, so you're welcome. And, here's the thing… I've been chatting with my pal Subspace, and from what I hear I don't think you mind THAT much."
Daisy stared, feeling thrown off. "What're you talking about?"
"Well, the way I hear it, politics aren't the part of the job you like. All that pomp and ceremony and schmoozing with double-talking foreign backstabbers? Oh, and balancing a national budget is a drag too I'm sure." Wart sighed, exhausted just thinking about it. "None of that is why you do what you do, is it? You're there because you want to be something. You want to feel like you matter."
Anger welled up in her. "EXCUSE me!? You wanna die?! I'll fight you right here, you swamp sucking hack!"
"Whoa, hey now!" Wart held up his hands for mercy, playing it all off with a chuckle. "No need to get so worked up! I'm not the one saying all this about you. I went to check in with the Heart of Subspace earlier and before I could even get in a 'how are you' they were telling me ALL the grizzly details of your past. They're a nice primordial deity, don't get me wrong, but they are such a gossip, and they have a real problem with boundaries. But I don't need to tell you that! Sorry about it rooting around in your brain like that. I keep telling them to knock that off, but they can't seem to help themselves!"
Daisy got the sensation that, unless a fight broke out, there was a real possibility Wart might talk her to death. She held back the urge to punch him. She was outnumbered five to one and surrounded. Those were bad odds even for her.
"Is there a point you want to make or do you just like wasting time?" she said.
"Straight to business! I like that," Wart said as he got out of his seat. "Here's the deal. I heard your backstory, good stuff by the way, it brought me to tears, maybe there's a movie or book deal in there somewhere but let's not get ahead of ourselves. My takeaway is that this whole princess… thing is something you do for attention. Don't look at me like that! There's nothing wrong with wanting attention. I love attention," he looked at his minions and spread his arms wide. "WE love attention. That's why we're working so hard to put this show on, to feel wanted and worthy and special. It's a basic essential need, ask any scientist and they'll agree. The problem is the rest of the world. Only so many people get to be special and you gotta bust your hump to even get noticed. The whole system is rigged if you ask me. Why should you have to keep winning tournaments when it's obvious to anyone with more than a handful of brain cells that you're awesome?"
Daisy was put on edge by how much sense Wart was talking. Her whole life was a race to win all the trophies she could, but no matter how far she ran she had to keep running. She thought about all the stress and running around it was taking to keep Hiyohoi from stealing her crown. It was hard work. A treadmill she had been stuck on her whole adult life. But, that was not all it was.
"I like competing," she said. Winning a tournament was a rush. It made her feel alive. "I don't need to cheat like you to get what I want."
Wart scoffed. "You think what I'm doing is cheating? Please. The Stars decided a long time ago that none of my dreams would come true. They judged the wishes in my heart and decided I was worth less than other people. Do you think that's fair? All I ever wanted was to be an entertainer! To bring joy to people all over the world! What's so wrong about that?"
"Maybe the part where you dreamnap a whole nation of people to do it," Daisy said.
"What if I told you that if you help me, I can let everyone go?"
Daisy balked. "What?"
Wart waved an arm and the whole room rippled with shadow. The two of them reappeared on the stage of the concert hall. A thousand chained captives stared back at Daisy from the audience. Her subjects squirmed, their eyes pleading for rescue. Wart regarded them all with pity.
"See, the only reason I abducted these people is 'cause the Sundream Stone played so hard to get. I need A LOT of dream power to make my plan work. Borrowing it all from these poor souls is plan B. But... suppose I had all the dream gems? I could skip harvesting the dreams off these good people. That's where you come in."
A spotlight clacked open, revealing the Sundream Stone's empty tablet. Five empty petal shaped slots and an indentation for Sunny's face.
"If we stop fighting and just help each other, I'll not only let everyone go but I'll cut you in on the plan."
Daisy stared at Sunny's tablet. "And just what are you planning?"
"Simple," Wart said. "The whole world gets a front row seat to our special concert. I got a magical song cooked up. Anyone who hears it becomes an instant fan. It's downright hypnotic, if you catch my drift."
Daisy remembered Mouser's dancing spell, and how the dreamnapped victims could not wake up.
"You're going to brainwash people into liking you?"
"Oh, nothing that extreme," he said, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. "I'm just going to use the power of dreams and a pinch of subspace to tweak a few things. Tip the scales in our favor, y'know? That's all."
Daisy slapped his hand away. "THIS is your plan? You're going to mind control the whole planet so people pay attention to you? You're pathetic."
Wart fell into an uncharacteristic silence. His lips twisted in hurt, and he turned away.
"Not all of us were born with the charm, or the talent, or the luck to make our dreams come true," he said. "Some of us have spent our whole lives trying and failing because the whole system is rigged. If the only way I can win is by rewriting a few million brains, then so be it. I'll take over Subcon and wrest control of all dreams from the Stars if that's what it takes to make mine come true!"
She shook her head. "What gives you the right to control dreams? You think you're better than the stars?"
He faced her again, his face grit with determination. "I know I'm better and I can prove it by winning," he said. "Could anyone but the best actually pull this off? Why should anyone less rule over all dreams? I won't settle for less! If the Stars don't care, then neither do I! I'll be my own star!"
Daisy stared at this goofy, angry frog man and was unsettled by how much of herself she saw in him. She remembered a sleepless night in the orphanage years and years ago when her anger at the tragedy of her life took hold of her. She raged without the words to explain it and carried that anger with her even after mother took her from that place. On the field, that feeling drove her to win. She had to. She could not settle for less. But looking at Wart, Daisy realized that emotion she carried was not anger. It was fear. The fear of being a tiny worthless speck beneath the notice of anyone.
Her clenched fists went slack. She wanted to hang onto her anger, but it was evaporating. She felt a sick respect for what Wart was doing. What was she even doing here? She was no hero. It was only a few hours ago that she helped shove Mario into quicksand to get what she wanted. The difference between her and Wart was a matter of scale.
"I…" Daisy hated herself for actually considering this. "You want me to join you?"
Wart's face softened. He was taken off-guard. Perhaps he was so worked up he had not expected to sway her at all.
"…The offer is on the table," he said.
"You attacked my kingdom," she reminded herself. "Why would I side with you?"
"Think of it as a growing pain." His voice lowered to a soothing caress. "Would you really miss your little kingdom and all its problems if you could have something bigger? Something better? If you got the attention you wanted on YOUR terms, not THEIRS?"
Daisy looked out into the audience. Her people were bound and gagged. Docile. The people of Sarasaland were fickle. They followed their greatest champion and if that champion ever faltered they would be forgotten. There was never any time to rest. In this moment her people had no choice but to watch her, and she let herself wonder what it would be like if things were always like this.
"It would be nice to have another band member again," Wart said. "…We used to have another person. Birdo of the birdo tribe. I think you've met her? She might be going by Birdetta or Cathy or Ostro now? Not sure what she settled on. She was still figuring herself out at the time. You'd know better than I would."
"It's um… fluid." Daisy knew Birdo from tennis, golf and kart racing. She was a big personality but not a regular.
"That sounds like her!" Wart said, growing cordial again. "Yeah, she did the female vocals for us during the first couple Subcon invasions but bailed on us to focus on acting. I hear she does musicals too now, which leaves me a little salty. …It's fine, I'll be happy for her. Especially when I think I'm looking at a better candidate anyway."
"I'm not a singer," Daisy said.
"You think talent matters in this industry?!" Wart said. "It's all about IMAGE, baby. We can fix the actual music in post with dream magic, who cares. What matters to me is I look at you and I see TENACITY. A woman who will stop at nothing to get what she wants. The 8-bits could use someone like you. What'd ya say?"
The proposal lingered in the air. Daisy could not argue with what Wart was doing without feeling like a hypocrite. What stopped her was the sense that agreeing was a sort of losing. The difference between them was the same as a team uniform. Daisy had her team, and he had his. And she played to win. Was that enough? What did winning even mean anymore?
"I'll let them all go," Wart said. "The Sarasalanders, the New Donkers, the yoshis, everyone. That purple guy can tag along with us too, if he wants."
Did Wart know Waluigi was the one holding the dream gems? If she went through with this, would she have to sell HIM on the idea? What would he even think about any of this? It troubled Daisy that she had no idea what would happen if their roles were reversed.
"Oh and uh…" Wart said. "That sprixie. What's-her-face. Wendy? Yeah. Obviously she gets to go free too."
"Wanda," Daisy said.
Wanda would never say yes to this. Wanda was simple and pure and dumb and all she cared about was doing the right thing. She wouldn't worry about her own interest. She would refuse this stupid deal outright because of what would happen to other people. She was the only person on Team Daisy who would act like a hero in this situation. And being heroes is what they set out to do.
"No," Daisy said.
Wart raised an eyebrow. "Pardon?"
"You can take this deal and choke on it, Wart. I'm not helping you!"
"Okay, not sure what just happened here, maybe you should slow down."
Daisy put up her dukes. "Maybe YOU should slow down and I should PUNCH you to death. Let's go!"
She gave him her best right hook. Her fist bounced off his personal force field and she was knocked off her feet.
"Alright," Wart said. "I can tell you're having trouble deciding and emotions are running a little hot. Maybe take a breather. How about you go talk it over with your boyfriend and get back with me?"
"Waluigi is not my boyfriend!"
"Oh yeah?" he said. "My mistake. Anyway toots, this gravy train is about to pull out of the station. If you don't want on, that's fine. I still got plan B. You want to talk sense, you see me on-stage before the show starts, yeah? Cool. Good talk. Ciao."
Wart snapped his fingers and Daisy was engulfed in a whirlwind of darkness.