August 1977

James still couldn't believe Sirius and Hermione had kept her becoming an Animagus from them. Part of him understood why they hadn't told them. Remus would have protested Hermione attempting the transformation even if they all knew he was unlikely to have convinced her not to do it.

It was more that they had kept it a secret. James rarely kept things from his friends, the occasional birthday gift or prank but nothing more serious than that once they had shown Remus their own Animagus forms. And that they hadn't told them stung — even if what Hermione did was exactly what they'd done to Remus a year ago.

Besides, for all James kept little from his friends, he knew they all had secrets of their own. Even Sirius, for all he may like to play at being the extrovert, kept his cards close to his chest.

He'd always let them keep their secrets in the past. Never prying into Grimmauld Place or life in Lupin Cottage because he didn't need to. No matter what his friends were keeping to their own confidence, it didn't affect his relationship with them. And he'd always assured himself he didn't need to know everything about the very private aspects of their lives to be their friends.

Instead, he had always been content to let them use his home as a hideaway, so he was perplexed by why he was preoccupied with the fact Hermione had kept her transformation a secret when they'd done the same thing. And yet, he couldn't stop thinking about it. So much so, he was distracted even when he met Lily.

They had spent the summer exchanging letters. Which had slowly progressed into meeting up as they would with any of their other friends. Meaning James had left a quiet Remus and a cautiously optimistic Sirius back at the Manor to meet with her not long after Hermione had disappeared through the floo. But regardless of the fact they were alone together, what he was on, was most definitely not a date.

He had sworn off trying to form a romantic attachment to her, after all. And despite the fact the stuttering of his heart had only grown more pronounced as they got to know each other, James was determined to honour his agreement with Lily and had all but given up any hope of a romantic relationship. Instead, committing to being her friend, even if he suspected there would always be a tiny torch that burnt for her.

Still, the summer had progressed to the point they were comfortable getting lunch together at Diagon since they were guaranteed to be interrupted by overly nosy friends at his house and Lily's magic-hating sister at hers. So, instead, they had agreed to meet at the Leaky Cauldron in one of the many letters they'd exchanged.

Usually, he was attentive. Enjoying Lily's company and the chance to tease her about her inevitable appointment as Head Girl. Or, more accurately, enjoy her increasingly flustered state as she worried she wouldn't achieve a dream seven years in the making.

Today though, he was distracted. Still thinking about Hermione and Sirius keeping secrets from them, and Lily recognised as much when he hadn't responded to her for the second time in as many minutes.

Breaking through his thoughts, she sounded frustrated if concerned, "James, what's wrong? You've been all over the place since you got here?"

Logically, James knew he should deny everything, but over the past year, Lily had become a friend he knew he could trust not to pry any further than he offered, and she was likely to provide some much-needed perspective.

"Sorry, I'm just distracted."

A single eyebrow raised in question.

"I don't really know how to explain, but Hermione and Sirius have been working together on something for a year now, and they've only just told us anything about it," His frustration was evident in his tone, and Lily nodded as he explained.

"So you're frustrated they only just told you?"

"No," James admitted, he knew why they'd waited. "I guess I just feel like they may be keeping something else from us too."

"Ahh," Lily tried to suppress a smile, " Well, we all thought there may be more going on there." She gave him a knowing look, but he still didn't understand what she was implying, and James knew his confusion was obvious.

Laughing softly, she shook her head before continuing, "Did you notice how stories of Sirius' escapades seemed to disappear this year?"

He nodded. Ever since they'd been allowed on Hogsmeade trips, Sirius had rarely been without a date. Partially among those interested in the Heir to the Black family fortune and partially among those interested because he shunned his family's values. Either way, he'd never been lacking in people to accompany him to the village, and as they got older, the stories that got passed around the castle had grown increasingly scandalous.

Even without those stories, though, James would have known about Sirius' escapades because he'd never had issues sharing the details of who he'd been spending his time within the comfort of their room. Though, based on what Sirius told them, there were rather more stories than actual events.

But, what Lily said was true. Those tales all but disappeared over the past year, and the stories told in the Marauders' dorm had stopped as well.

Regardless of that, though, Sirius had continued to disappear for hours at a time, only to return looking distinctly dishevelled, so James had assumed he was dealing with his parents and Uncle Alphard's death in the same way he'd dealt with the fallout of leaving Grimmauld Place. By finding affection where it was willingly given by any number of their peers, even if those trysts rarely lasted longer than that. He had only assumed the stories stopped as Sirius had learnt to be more discrete.

Lily looked at him, waiting for him to make the connection, but James still didn't understand what she was implying, so she tried again, "I mean, we all saw how weird Sirius was when Shacklebolt and Hermione were together, right? Some of the girls and I thought there may be more to their relationship?"

Sirius had been strange when Hermione first announced she was going to Hogsmeade with Shacklebolt. And though it had toned down a lot over time, there had definitely been an underlying tension in some of the questions Sirius had asked about their relationship. Even having it laid out before him, though, James still couldn't quite process what she was saying.

Hermione and Sirius?

If he thought about it, James supposed they had always had a very different relationship than the rest of them. More teasing and less sibling-esque than his relationship with Hermione and obviously different from Hermione's relationship with Remus, too, so it wasn't entirely out of the question.

Even still — Hermione and Sirius?

But then he thought about how out of sorts Sirius seemed the days leading up to the full moon. Almost withdrawn and unusually absent. They'd all been panicked when Hermione hadn't been there at breakfast one morning, but Sirius seemed even more so than the rest of them. And when she had finally returned, he still seemed unusually stiff, at least until he'd followed her to the floo when Hermione had gone to leave the Manor.

Was it possible? Hermione and Sirius? It was almost too bizarre a thought for it to be real, and yet, it strangely made sense. There had always been more to their bickering than it seemed, and beyond that, James knew Hermione had relied on Sirius to help her with the transformation.

And they sort of matched as well. Sirius' recklessness and Hermione's caution that so often gave way to more impulsive desires, like biting Moony the very first night she spent with them in her Animagus form.

Both crazily smart, even if they showed it in different ways. Both keeping their own secrets. They had more than their fair share of similarities, but there were differences too.

But even those sort of worked, Sirius being one of the only people able to draw Hermione out of her more compulsive moments. Like the morning when they got their OWL results, and Hermione had been nearly awash with nerves, and Sirius had distracted her almost without thinking about it.

Or how Hermione was one of the few people capable of holding Sirius accountable for his actions. James was still sure Hermione had been the one to explain the gravity of the Shrieking Shack Incident, even if they'd never discussed it, and James didn't know if Sirius would have believed the words coming from anyone else.

"James?" Lily's voice broke through his musings again.

"Sorry, I'm just processing. Hermione and Sirius?" he questioned.

"Maybe. We don't like, know, but it would explain a lot. Plus, Black did keep disappearing, and I haven't caught him out on prefect rounds since that time with Marlene, and jokes aside, we both know she'd never do that to Dorcas, so …"

For all he could understand what Lily meant, he still couldn't process it. When would it have even started? James couldn't remember Sirius mentioning anyone since Hestia back in November, but he also knew Hermione wasn't the type of person to do that to Kingsley. And no matter how badly that relationship had ended, he knew that wasn't the reason why. So, some time since March?

None of it made sense to him, so he turned his gaze back towards Lily helplessly, "But why wouldn't they tell us?" he pleaded.

Lily looked at him in disbelief, "Your best friend and your other best friend's sister?" she said as if it should have explained everything, and James supposed it did to an extent.

It wasn't as if he was opposed to the idea necessarily. It would be strange and undeniably awkward, but if they were happy, did he really care? And from their perspective, it was hardly the easiest thing in the world to discuss.

Lily chucked next to him as she watched the multitude of emotions cross his face, "I can see this has been something of a revelation to you."

He nodded absentmindedly while she continued speaking, "I won't have been to hurt you. They probably just wanted to figure things out for themselves and didn't want to make things uncomfortable before they knew. Anyway, I, unfortunately, am expected at dinner tonight since Petunia is introducing Vernon to my parents and need time to mentally prepare myself, so I have to go."

He winced in sympathy, well aware of Lily's thoughts on her sister's boyfriend, and wished her good luck before she departed.

Paying for their lunches, he wandered Diagon meaninglessly. Glancing at the new Cleansweep and thinking ahead to his last Quidditch season but mainly still processing the idea of Sirius and Hermione together.

He made it through dinner, even if Remus and Sirius kept giving him strange looks for his unusually quiet demeanour. It wasn't until they were playing exploding snap over fingers of firewhisky that he broke. Blurting out the question uncontrollably.

"Are you shagging Hermione?"

Not how he had meant to address the subject or even the question he intended to ask, James was terrified what their reactions would be. Sirius immediately started choking on the drink he'd just taken a sip of while Remus froze on his other side.

Controlling his breathing, Sirius managed to get out, "Merlin, Prongs. No, what the fuck?"

"Sorry – it was just something Lily suggested."

"What?" Remus and Sirius cried, confused. Both still baffled by his question, they were looking at him like he'd gone mad.

"When we were having lunch today," his friends exchanged a glance that he didn't feel like examining, "She suggested the two of you may have been together."

"How did that even come up?" Sirius asked incredulously.

"It just did," he replied. Not quite willing to admit he'd been discussing the secrets Sirius and Hermione had been keeping.

Next to them both, Remus shook his head, "Well, it doesn't matter how it came up because it's not true, right Padfoot."

Sirius shifted uncomfortably, and Remus' eyebrows rose, growling slightly under his breath. "Right, Padfoot?"

Sirius' guilty expression did not abate, and instead, there was a light flush of pink spreading across his face.

"Are you shagging my sister?" Remus sounded somewhere between enraged and horrified, while James only felt the latter.

The idea of Hermione shagging anyone was something he never wanted to think about again, and certainly not something he wanted to discuss with the person she may have been engaging with — best friend or not.

"No! No," Sirius rushed to reply before pausing and looking at them both like he was weighing up how bad the response would be to his next comment. Seemingly having come to a conclusion, he drew his shoulders up to his head before continuing, "But we may have snogged a little?"

"I don't … I don't want to hear this," Remus choked out, "Stop. Please, I don't want details; just stop."

He was almost begging, knowing that a younger Sirius would have gladly shared them.

Instead of continuing in the manner, he would have two years ago, Sirius slumped sadly against the sofa. Something James wanted to assume was out of respect for Moony's pleas but looking at his friend, knew it was more than that.

James didn't want details any more than Remus did, but he still found himself asking a sympathetic, "What?"

"There aren't exactly any details to share."

Pained expression returning to Remus' face, he braced himself to ask the question. Seemingly resigning himself to an uncomfortable conversation, "And what, exactly, does that mean."

"We're not together or anything. It was more of a heat of the moment kind of thing."

Moony made a distressed sound as a slow look of realisation crossed his face, but Sirius was on a roll. Relieved to finally be discussing whatever had been bothering him, "She swears she's not mad about it, but she's also only been back for the moon since."

Sirius looked almost defeated, and James suddenly realised why "But you want more."

"Maybe," he reluctantly admitted.

"Is that why you helped Hermione with the transformation?" Remus asked, addressing the elephant that had been in the room since breakfast. None of them quite knowing how to bring up the fact Sirius had apparently been helping her with it all year.

"No," Sirius shook his head. "I'd have done that no matter what. Can you imagine what she'd have done if we'd tried to stop her?"

James shivered slightly at the thought. For all Hermione kept quietly to herself, for the most part, she had a surprisingly vicious streak that she had no problem directing at them if she thought they were overstepping. And he dreaded to think what she would have done if they'd actually tried to stop her.

He swore he could still occasionally feel the donkey's ears she'd cursed them all with at the start of fourth year. Sirius had had a difficult summer at Grimmauld, and they'd tried to convince Hermione to break things off with Malfoy. It had got the point she cursed them with magic that should have been far beyond her years but wasn't entirely out of character for her. Claiming, if they were going to behave like asses, they could look like them too.

She'd got away with it as well. No points loss or detention, and James was still sure she'd been the one to convince Madam Pomfrey it was best to let the curse fade by itself. Forcing the four of them to spend the better part of two days with their newly furry appendages.

And looking at Remus, he was thinking about those uncomfortable few days well. All of them shaking themselves slightly at the memory.

"Yeah," Remus sighed. "Am I thrilled she just showed up at the moon? No. Should I have expected anything less? Also, no — we all know Hermione does what she wants regardless of what I think."

"I didn't actually know about that bit," Sirius confessed. "But we're good?" He asked hesitantly. Apparently wanting to make sure things truly were okay within the Marauders.

"I doubt she gave you much choice," Remus chuckled. "And it's not like you've ever really been able to say no to her Padfoot."

"What does that mean?"

"Only that I'm beginning to understand the phrase ignorance is bliss." Remus sighed

"What?"

"I've always known you liked her, Padfoot."

James whipped his head towards Sirius, expecting him to deny what Remus was saying but instead watching as the earlier light flush deepened into something James didn't think he'd ever seen on his friend.

Grimacing as he spoke, Remus continued, "I could smell it on you. But you never mentioned it, and frankly, I didn't want to think about it. So much so, I apparently overlooked it when I could smell her on you this year. I assumed you'd just been bugging her or something."

Sirius at least had the decency to look embarrassed at the idea Remus had recognised his attraction to Hermione long before either of them had addressed it. And James found himself questioning how much he and Remus overlooked simply because they didn't want to understand what was there, especially since Lily had apparently realised before them.

It did bring up new questions, though, and James interrupted before either of them could speak again, "How long has this been going on?"

Sirius shifted uncomfortably before replying, "Fuck if I know Prongs."

"What?"

"I don't know," Sirius cried. "Mini's just always been different. Off-limits, I guess." He shrugged awkwardly as he spoke and part of James wanted to lay off his friend. Still, curiosity overruled the desire to put Sirius out of his misery.

"What?"

"Look — Mini's always just been Mini, right? And we've always been different than you lot?" Sirius explained. "She was never mine, so I just ignored it."

"Right," Remus sighed, "But when did that change."

"I don't know. The transformation? Mr and Mrs P? Shacklebolt?" The last word was said with an element of distaste that made James question further,

"Shacklebolt?"

"Shacklebolt," Sirius sighed. "Fuck, I hated him. But Mini was happy, so I left it. Went to Hogsmeade with Hestia and everything."

"And after Hestia?" Remus asked.

Sirius shifted uncomfortably again, "No one. Hestia was the last."

"What?" James asked, yet again. Based on what Lily had said, he'd suspected they'd been together since March. The idea that Sirius had apparently been waiting since November had never occurred to him. "You haven't been with anyone since the Hogsmeade Attack?"

"No," he confessed. "We'd already been spending so much time together because of the transformation and then she saves your life, Prongs — and if I wasn't gone already?" Sirius shrugged as if to say he didn't know what would have happened, but James suspected they all knew.

Sirius continued on though, "And then Uncle Alphard happened, and Mr and Mrs P, and there just hadn't been anyone else."

He looked uncomfortable, having admitted as much, staring down at the half drunk glass of firewhisky like it may hold the answer to the fact Hermione had disappeared back to Lupin Cottage while James waited unsure what to say.

Eventually, Remus spoke, "So, Hermione?"

"Hermione," Sirius sighed,

"And you haven't told her any of this?"

"No — said she needed time to process," he grumbled the last word as if he didn't know what it meant while Remus' lips twitched in understanding.

"But she said she's coming back?"

"Yeah," Sirius replied with almost pitiful hope, and James watched Remus sigh as if admitting defeat.

"Then tell her," he said, ignoring Sirius' look of surprise as he continued, "Oh, fuck — is this part where I'm supposed to threaten you?"

Hermione didn't know why she was surprised when Pandora appeared through her floo. She was alone in the cottage as was normal during the summer.

Remus still at the Potters, her father was away for work, and her mother was out at her own job during the day. It had given her plenty of time to think over everything to do with Sirius.

She could still see his face. How guilty he looked at the thought he'd done something to make her uncomfortable, and it haunted her that she'd put him in that position. Because it wasn't one that he had ever deserved to be in.

That didn't mean she'd resolved her concerns about a relationship with Sirius, though. She wasn't lying when she said she needed time to process. Every one of her concerns remained regardless of how bad she felt for leading Sirius to think he'd done something wrong. Or how reassured she had felt after their conversation, that he hadn't pushed her to make a decision and had been so concerned about her reaction.

It had done very little to hamper her desire for there to be something more between them, and without worrying over revealing her animagus form to her brother, Hermione had plenty of time to stress over the potential of a relationship with Sirius.

Because no matter how many times she listed all the reasons it would be a bad idea, there was some traitorous part of her that thought maybe.

Staying true to her word, she'd retreated back to Lupin Cottage to contemplate her options, but the time alone had done little to help her, so as confused as she was to see Pandora appearing out of her fireplace, Hermione was relieved too.

She hadn't expected to see her friend until the train ride back up to Hogwarts, but part of her wasn't surprised to see her here either. Like so many other things, Pandora instinctively knew when Hermione needed her help, and while she was almost scared as to what unsettling truths Pandora would reveal, she was thankful to see her friend as well.

"Pandora?" It was questioning, as while she could see her friend in front of her, Hermione still didn't quite know what she was doing in her kitchen. After last summer, she had never expected to see her overly polished friend in her shabby kitchen again.

"Hello, Hermione," wide blue eyes fixed on her, and Hermione knew Pandora had come to impart uncomfortable wisdom.

"Hey," she settled on replying lamely, "How are you?"

"Probably doing better than you, by the looks of it."

As harsh as Pandora's words were, Hermione couldn't deny they were the truth. Despite it being almost midday, she was still in her pyjamas, her hair almost uncontrollable where it had been secured into place on top of her head. She knew she looked a disaster, but it only matched her emotional state after so many days of thinking over her options.

On the other hand, Pandora looked perfectly put together as she had the entire time Hermione had known her. Even asleep, Pandora was the perfect picture of the pureblood witch. All silk nightgowns covering her from collarbone to shin, so opposite to Hermione's own ratty pyjamas and yet, so exactly her friend Hermione didn't even feel embarrassed about the state of herself. Instead, relieved to see Pandora remained such a constant, even if nothing else about her presence could be relied on for such reassurances.

"Probably," Hermione admitted, "It's been a busy summer."

"Yes. And you've got yourself quite worked up over it as well."

"You know then?"

"I have an idea."

Gesturing towards the kitchen table, Pandora took a seat and Hermione was suddenly taken back to last summer. They were almost exactly as they were a year ago and yet they were no longer discussing the Dark Arts and Tom Riddle. Instead, they were stuck on the somewhat more mundane topic of Hermione's love life.

Still, at least with Voldemort, she knew what to do. Between the two of them, they had some ideas. Rather than with Sirius, where she was still stuck in the unfortunate position of wanting more but knowing it would likely end badly.

Pandora accepted the tea offered, having kept those pale blue eyes trained on her the whole time she was making it. As if by examining Hermione, more would become clear to her.

Something about the way Pandora had kept her gaze on her the entire time broke Hermione's resolve, and she blurted out what had happened, uncontrollably, "I snogged Sirius."

Despite her frantic tone, Pandora didn't look shocked by Hermione's confession. Instead, letting a small smile play about her lips as if she had expected as much. Which Hermione supposed was possible, considering she'd shown up at her house unexpectedly.

"I see. And you didn't want to?"

"No, I did," Hermione grumbled, still not quite willing to admit that much to herself but knowing it was the truth. As much of a surprise as their adrenaline-fuelled kiss had been, not only had she very much enjoyed it, but part of her had wanted to do it for a very long time. "But I shouldn't have."

"Why not?"

"You know why, Pandora. There's so much I can't tell him. Look at what happened with Kingsley."

"But Sirius isn't Kingsley," Pandora replied as if it was obvious that should have made all the difference.

Which it did to an extent. A lot of what she couldn't tell Kingsley had more to do with Remus' secret than her own. The disappearing for the full moon, the Animagus transformation, they'd all gone back to Remus' lycanthropy, and Sirius already knew about that.

"No, he's not. But I still can't tell him anything."

"Maybe not," she agreed, "But has he ever pried into your affairs before?"

"No," Hermione admitted. While she hadn't lied about wanting to learn duelling because of the war, Sirius had never expressly asked why she was concerned about learning to fight. Instead, he'd just accepted her desires and had taken up the role as her partner, "But things could still go so wrong."

"They could. But does the possibility of something ending badly mean we shouldn't try at all. I already told you that things are going to get worse, don't deny yourself happiness because of fear."

Hermione understood what Pandora was saying theoretically. Because she knew better than anyone that things were going to get darker. That there would be more deaths and disappearances, and once they left the safety of Hogwarts, the boys would all be embroiled in the depths of the war, and that just because things had ended badly with one person didn't mean they would with another.

But that didn't mean she wasn't afraid. She was brave enough to admit that much. What happened with Kingsley had hurt because she knew it was her fault. That her secrets had been their downfall, and Hermione's wasn't sure if she'd survive that again, not if it meant potentially ruining her brother's friendships too.

But Pandora was also right. She shouldn't let her fear stop her from living her life. The war was going to be difficult on all of them, and should she really deny herself some small amount of comfort because of her fear over possibilities.

She tried to think about what Harry would have done in her situation. Harry, who had sacrificed so much for the greater good, he'd even ended things with Ginny in an attempt to save her.

She knew Harry would never do it. That he would have continued to deny himself Ginny's love for her own good. But Hermione also knew she'd disagreed with what he was doing. That he had denied himself the hope and happiness that came from a relationship, and why shouldn't she follow her own advice.

Even if she accepted that because things hadn't worked in the past didn't mean they were destined to work out the same way. But, there was still one complication.

Remus.

"But what about my brother?" she pleaded, almost afraid of what Pandora would say. Hoping she may have some unique insight into what he would think.

Instead, she smirked slightly, an unusual expression on her friend but also one that spoke to her seemingly all-knowing state.

"I'm sure you'll know what he thinks soon enough."

Before Hermione could ask what she meant, the floo sounded again, and her brother appeared out of their fireplace.

AN: so ive recently got twitter where im MS976_ so if thats ur thing come say hi! yell at me about cliffhangers, or the slow burn, or gimme ur theories about where this is headed bc the whole fics planned out and im curious as to whether people guess so come talk to me lol