Disclaimer:- See Chapter One
Rating:- T
Chapter 29
"Hellooooo!" Buffy shouted waving her arms in Willow's face, "I'm right here, I haven't gone anywhere!"
She sighed in frustration when Willow didn't react to her presence and stomped out of the house, watching as Xander climbed into the car with Lucas and Spike. She ran forward and slipped through the car to sit behind them on the back seat.
"Woah, kinda cool but sorta creepy too" she said looking over Xander's shoulder at her baby boy, "Hey piglet, you're ok now, Uncle Xander has you". She grinned at him then frowned when Spike started the car and pulled away from the curb with Lucas cradled in Xander's arms instead of in a car seat. They were only a few streets away from their house but still, not all drivers drove safely. Lucas stared straight at her and gurgled happily. Blinking in surprise she moved a little and laughed when his eyes followed her. At least someone could see her.
Suddenly she felt herself flying backwards, being pulled through houses and buildings in a completely different direction. Before she knew it she had stumbled to a stop next to Giles who was standing in front of a window staring desperately at the room beyond it.
She turned and saw Jameson barking orders as he rolled her onto her side, slapping gauze pads onto the wounds on her back at the same time he manoeuvred her onto her front, staring at her x-ray hanging on the light box as he pulled at some of the smaller bits of wood sticking out of her back making her look like a demented hedgehog.
"Buffy please, don't leave me" she heard Giles whimper and felt the tears well up in her eyes.
"I'm right here love, I haven't left you, I promised I wouldn't remember" she said reaching for him. She groaned in frustration when her hand fell through his arm, throwing her arms in the air when he didn't seem to notice her, "What's the point of having a bond when he doesn't see my spirit when I'm standing right here next to him" she grumbled.
"Because you aren't a spirit my dear"
She whirled around, staring at Giles' Grandmother in shock. She was standing a few feet from her with a smirk on her face, humour dancing in her eyes and looking so much like Giles at that moment that Buffys heart lurched in pain.
"Oh yeah? Then what am I if I'm not a spirit?" Buffy asked her defensively.
"You are a shade" she told her, laughing at her confused expression. "If Annabelle had successfully hit you with her whole spell then yes, you would indeed be a spirit but you would also be dead"
"But I threw the scythe and it cut the spell in two" Buffy said closing her eyes when everything finally clicked into place, looking back at Giles sadly.
"Exactly as you were meant to" Edna told her pulling her away from her Grandson, "The dream was never about your death Buffy but about how to survive"
"You've been giving me the dreams" she said understanding at last where they had come from.
"We have been giving you the dreams" a familiar voice said behind her.
"Mom!" she gasped out before running at her, wrapping her arms around her with a sob.
"Ssh Buffy it's ok" Joyce said softly, holding her tightly, "We visited Bash occasionally as well" she told her, smiling when Buffy pulled back in shock.
She looked between the two women and scowled, "Which one told him to keep it a secret?" she asked.
"That would be me" Joyce said with an unrepentant grin, "You were already under a lot of stress and I didn't want to add to it"
"So making my son feel guilty for keeping a secret after I told him that secrets were bad is ok then" she said, lifting her hands to her hips as she glared at her mother, "not cool Mom"
Joyce laughed, unconcerned by her daughters scolding, "He is an amazing little boy Buffy, you've done a wonderful job with him"
"I agree," Edna said stepping up next to Joyce, "he wouldn't be who he is if you hadn't raised him as you have"
"It wasn't just me" she said sadly, wrapping her arms around herself to hold back the pain she didn't want to feel yet, "Ethan helped in the beginning"
"I'm sorry he's gone Buffy" Joyce said stroking a hand over her hair, "He knew he was under a spell, he tried to get help to fight it off"
Buffy lifted her tear filled eyes to her mother, "He knew? How?"
"An old mystic like Ethan is well versed in recognising when they are under a spells sway," Edna told her gently, "he had a feeling he was supposed to be remembering something and slowly realised he was missing time as well so he went to his old friend Raven for help"
"And Raven helped him weaken the spell," Joyce continued, "she adjusted it enough that Ethan's emotions played a huge part in stopping that dagger from hurting Lucas"
Buffy nodded with a breathless laugh, "I knew he would never hurt Lucas"
"He loved you like a daughter Buffy, he would never willingly hurt you" Edna told her, tucking her hair behind her ear and pressing her lips to her forehead.
Buffy started to shake as the reality of what had happened to Ethan sunk in. She blinked and found herself standing next to Ethan's body. She dropped to the floor, scooting back until she was pressed against the wall, gulping back the panicked gasps and whimpering in shock at suddenly being confronted by his body. The dagger had been removed leaving a hole in his chest where it had been, the edges pale and puckered and the skin around it white compared to the dark red blood that had dried in an angry looking slash across his chest.
Memories of Ethan crashed into her like a tidal wave; him making her laugh, awkwardly holding her while she cried in the early stages of their friendship, watching him play with Bash. Every single memory she had of him played out in her minds eye as she let the tears flow, sobs tearing from her throat as she bent her head to her knees, the pain ripping its way out of her.
Eventually her sobs and tears calmed enough that she could stand again but when she looked up she saw her Mom and Edna standing with Giles and blinked in surprise at the way she was able to just move through space like that. She lifted the bottom of her t-shirt and dried her face, sniffing as she pushed herself to her feet. When she got close to them they turned, their sympathy plain on their faces and she shrugged, not wanting to talk about it.
"How long am I meant to be like this? Can I just climb back into my body?" she asked them, her voice wavering as she tried to hold back her grief.
"We don't know how long it will take to restore you to your body" Edna said turning back to the window after giving her a quick examination, "and as for your second question; unfortunately not, your body is not in the best shape" she told her gently.
Buffy looked over their shoulders and frowned. She was lying on her back with a tube in her mouth now. Her left arm had a cast on it, her right was wrapped tightly in bandages from her wrist to her shoulder and there was a small pile of wooden shards and splinters in a metal bowl next to her bed. "Then I guess I just have to wait until Willow figures it out then" she said with a sigh. She looked up at Giles and felt her heart breaking for him, "Can you do something for him? Give him a dream so he knows I'm not going anywhere?"
"No," Edna said sadly, looking at her Grandson with regret. "Although I would dearly love to be able to talk to him again, I do not have the ability to enter his dreams as I have with a Slayer and I can only do that at the bidding of The Powers That Be"
Buffy's brow furrowed in frustration, no point asking her to talk to Faith or one of the girls then she thought. "But I know Giles ok, he will not leave me here alone even though he knows he has to take care of the boys, this is his worst nightmare" she said instead, waving her arm at herself in the room beside them, "he's already had to live through my death once and that nearly killed him, I'm still not sure his liver will ever completely recover from that"
"Why do you call him Giles?" Edna asked with a smile.
Buffy stared at her in surprise, "What? What has that got to do with anything?"
"I'm curious why you call him Giles, his name is Rupert" Edna said, still smiling at her.
Buffy sighed and shook her head, "Because he isn't Rupert anymore, hasn't been him for a long time, but he isn't Ripper either. Rupert was just as much a mask as Ripper was. He's both of them, he's Giles" she said looking up at Edna with a smile, "He's my Giles"
"That he is my dear" Edna said taking her hand, "and nothing I, or anyone else, will say to him will change that. He will do what he feels he must".
All three of them watched in silence as Jameson bent over her to tie off the stitches holding her chest tube in place as the nurses finished wiping away the blood and grime. Giles didn't move, didn't even look away when Jameson came out to talk to him.
Buffy listened with interest as he told Giles about her injuries, flinching as he rattled them off in his doctor voice even though his eyes were betraying his real feelings at having to keep her alive.
"Rupert, I've done all I can here but the balls in her court now. She has a badly bruised spine, but thankfully no spinal cord damage that we can see, four broken ribs which caused her lung to collapse, her right collarbone is fractured and her shoulder is dislocated as well along with the fractured humerus which tells me she was hit with something solid and she will need surgery to repair that". He paused giving Giles a chance to respond, frowning when he remained silent, then continued, "Her right knee was dislocated and her left hip is fractured. Her left arm is broken and there are several deep puncture wounds to her back one of which was deep enough to almost puncture her lung, thankfully it didn't but it scratched it every time she took a breath. The puncture wound to her arm was deep enough to hit the bone but didn't really damage it. The fractured skull and bleeding on the brain is the most worrying but all of the bruises and cuts she has are mostly just superficial"
"Why does she have a tube?" Giles asked in a toneless whisper.
Jameson blinked at him in confusion, his gaze becoming worried before he cleared his throat, "Her right lung collapsed because of the broken ribs and her left lung was damaged by the wood, she can breathe on her own but we want to give her ribs a chance to heal before taking her off the vent. We'll be taking her down to the operating room soon" he told him gently.
Buffy blinked in surprise when Giles just nodded at him blankly before walking into the room. She watched him sit at her side, his hand fluttering over her, unsure where to touch that wouldn't cause her pain until, he just collapsed forward in the chair and broke down with his head in his hands. The sympathy on Jameson's face as he stood in the doorway before walking away down the hall was too much for her.
"I can't see this" she whispered, her heart breaking at the sight of him sitting there alone in his misery, backing away from the window, "I need to leave, can I leave?"
"You can, but you will be pulled back to your body eventually, you are still connected to it" Edna said, her own face showing the pain of seeing him this way.
"Just think about where you want to go and you'll be there" Joyce said softly.
Buffy nodded and closed her eyes thinking of home and her boys.
XXXXXXXXXXX
Xander walked softly up the stairs towards Bash's room. He had ignored his previous attempts to get him to come down so he decided to go get him, not willing to let him hide away again. The house had begun to feel like a morgue, the silence and shadows seemed to have grown since Buffy had left and smiling made him and everyone else feel guilty. He knew Buffy would be pissed at them for moping so he made the effort for her sake but it felt forced.
He heard a soft giggle and stopped with his hand raised at the door. He listened with confusion as Bash spoke to someone answering questions he couldn't hear and frowned when he heard him ask when his Mom was going to come home.
"Bash?" he pushed open the door and saw him standing in the middle of the room with a guilty blush on his face, "Who are you talking to?"
"No one" he said then ran past him and down the stairs.
Xander looked warily around the room and shivered. Knowing that Bash was a powerful little dude he refused to think about what he had just heard until he could talk to Willow about it when she got home from the hospital. By the time he reached the dining room Bash was sitting at the table talking to Dawn and Spike without a care in the world.
It had been three months since Buffy had been injured fighting Annabelle and it was getting harder and harder to maintain the belief she would wake up any time soon. Giles spent most of his time with her when he wasn't dealing with Council business, only coming home to spend time with the boys, shower and change, then put the boys to bed before going back to her side. Everyone was living here until she woke up, mostly because of the boys but they'd all unconsciously decided that being together right now was better for everyone, so for now this place was home.
They all took turns sitting beside her, even Spike. The Slayers had all adjusted their patrols to include the Council hospital where she was and Faith was constantly in contact asking for updates and offering Willow any help she could. She started by passing on information anytime a demon or vamp bragged about the comatose Slayer and then by putting her in contact with her local coven after one of the Witches said she might know what the spell was. But the demons and vamps were just rubbing salt in the wound and the spell wasn't the right one because the counter spell did nothing.
Willow was becoming increasingly frustrated and desperate as the days turned into weeks with no progress on the research into the spell Annabelle had used on Buffy. She was reading everything she could get her hands on when she wasn't on Buffy watch, buried in the recesses of the Council archives after exhausting the covens resources. Giles' tomes had been equally unhelpful and so far Spike had been unable to help either after failing to shake any information loose about Annabelle or Ethan, he'd even rummaged through their stuff hoping to find a lead but found nothing.
None of them knew about Ethan's final days or about the details of Buffy's dream and they all knew that without that information they were going to have to get used to hitting dead ends. Giles had refused to have Ethan's funeral without Buffy so he was still in the morgue. Just one more black cloud that hung over them these days.
Xander walked quietly towards Giles' study, where he retreated to when he was home, and listened to him talking to Lucas, a lump forming in his throat when he realised he was talking about Buffy.
"I know you want her little one, I want her home too, but she's not well" Giles said softly, his voice cracking slightly as his emotion leaked through the cheerful facade, "maybe I'll take you to see her soon, would you like that?"
Xander grinned when Lucas gurgled happily then turned away back towards the dining room, not missing the soft sigh from Giles. He sat at the table and watched Bash picking at his food with more enthusiasm than he had showed at lunch and wondered what he knew that they didn't.
Dawn sipped on a coffee, still showing no signs of a real appetite, and Spike sipped whatever it was that was in his mug, both of them staring at nothing in particular as the ticking of the clock echoed through the silent house.
Xander sighed and stabbed at a sausage. If she didn't wake up soon he knew life in this house would forever be on pause.
XXXXXXXXXXX
She'd been watching them for months, unseen and unheard by everyone except her baby boy, and she'd had enough of it.
She only got to spend half an hour at most in the house before she was pulled back to her body, screaming in frustration every time she was yanked back to depression central. She'd seen the constant flow of visitors that either walked passed her window looking in with sad eyes or sat beside her bed talking to her about what was going on, but she only really paid attention to Giles.
She was watching him now through the blur of tears as he fed Lucas, telling him that he would bring him to see her. She sniffed and huffed a frustrated sigh, walking behind him to smile down at Lucas as her thoughts chided Giles for lying to him.
She'd heard him telling her a week into her coma that he wouldn't bring the boys to visit, that he didn't want to upset them seeing her like that. She agreed, at first, when she looked like she'd gone ten rounds with a crazy witch and was bruised and swollen and held together with bandages and hope, but now…
She gasped as she was yanked back and screamed in frustration, stamping her foot as she flopped down on the foot of her bed. Willow was doing her nightly moisturising routine, the massage helping her muscles from going stiff, as she babbled about the failure of their research and updating her about the boys. Giles didn't have that information because he was with her most of the time, something she was itching to shout at him for despite his presence making her feel better.
She sighed and stood up, walking through the wall and out into the hallway to begin her usual patrol around the hospital, checking to see if any of the girls had been admitted and making sure the ones that were already here were healing ok.
She saw the same people working that she did every night. Jameson had taken to sleeping in his office so he could be at her side in seconds if her condition changed and he looked constantly stressed these days. The nurses were unfailingly cheerful as always, bustling around giving meds and taking specimens and vitals, making sure the patients who were awake were happy. The Slayers that were injured badly enough to need a bed asked about her at least once a day, joining together to make a pilgrimage to her room every night once everyone else was asleep.
She had also noticed a presence following her lately. It wasn't her Mom or Edna, they didn't follow her around they just waited for her at the house or in her room. She'd caught glimpses of different girls behind her in the reflections of the windows she passed but when she turned around they were gone. She thought she knew who, or what, they were but she wanted to talk to them to be sure.
Her heart skipped at a familiar peace that settled around her and she smiled; Giles was back. She turned and ran back to her room, her focus entirely on the pull she felt from him, ignoring that small voice in her head that was asking why he couldn't feel the same thing from her. So focused on seeing him she didn't see the figure running at her from the next hallway. Didn't register the movement at all until she was slammed into and pushed through the wall into an empty room.
She rolled and leapt to her feet, shock that she had been touched overwhelming the instinct to defend.
"Just wanted to test your reflexes" Kendra said with a smile.
Buffy's mouth dropped open in shock, "Am I dead then?" she asked as reality caught up with her.
Kendra frowned and shook her head, "No, but you being like this for so long means I can visit" she told her, her eyes following Buffy with amusement. She sighed and her expression hardened, "Your fight is not over yet Buffy"
"Huh? What do you mean my fights not over?" she asked, her eyes widening in surprise as the air shimmered around her and more girls she had once fought with materialised in the room behind Kendra along with ones pulled straight from a history book.
"Annabelle is not done" Amanda said with a small smile and a wave.
"Although she is in fact dead her connection to Eyghon has strengthened her spirit and she is working towards gaining enough strength to attack you in this form" a Slayer dressed in Victorian clothes told her.
"You noticed your magic fail you at the house, there was a reason for that" a dark haired Slayer dressed like a cowboy said from the back of the room.
"Those of us that had connected to the magic that flowed through us while we lived were able to direct it in battle, when it failed it was because we had depleted the well but in this form, it doesn't run out" the Victorian Slayer said.
Buffy looked around at the faces of the Slayers that came before her and smiled, "Seneya isn't here is she? Really not in the mood to deal with cave Slayer issues right now"
A giggle spread through the girls and Buffy felt better that some of her predecessors hadn't all been uptight Watcher drones.
"We will be back when you need us Buffy," Kendra said stepping forward and taking her hand, "you were never alone, we were always with you"
"Yeah that's not really comforting" she said with a smile, laughing when Kendra rolled her eyes at her.
"Be on your guard" she warned, the others beginning to fade away, "You need to watch your boys too"
And with that bit of stomach twisting news she vanished, leaving Buffy in an empty room staring at the spot Kendra had been standing in shock.
In her room Giles was frantically pacing as Jameson checked her over. Her monitors exploding with noise as her heart rate increased and her body twitched on the bed. She frowned in confusion when she felt her heart racing and focused on her monitors as she took deep calming breaths.
"Huh" she said, dropping down on her bed when the beeps from her machine calmed down right along with her heartbeat, "that's new" she muttered, watching Giles as he watched Jameson like a hawk.
"Ok, that was weird" Jameson said with a confused frown as he straightened and swung his stethoscope over his head, "She's still in the same condition and there is nothing to indicate why her heart rate shot up like that"
"Was she having a fit?" Giles asked as he sank into the chair at her side.
"No, her numbers suggest it was a panic attack but...but that isn't possible unless…"
"Unless she is actually awake" Giles said, his eyes lighting up with hope.
"Oh Giles, no, don't do that to yourself" she whispered in his ear as she lay her hands on his shoulders and rested her head against his.
She could tell Jameson was trying to sort his thoughts into words that wouldn't slap Giles in the face and she sighed and walked away from them, leaning against the wall on the other side of the room and crossing her arms, watching them talk.
"No Rupert, she isn't awake, her brainwaves haven't changed" he said pointing to the monitor on the other side of her bed, "she still has brain function which is a very good thing but her activity suggests she is still in an extremely deep sleep"
"Then why?" Giles asked, the hope dying in his eyes causing her heart to squeeze painfully in her chest, all three of them staring at the monitor when it beeped.
"What were you talking to Willow about when you arrived?" Jameson asked him as he watched the monitor.
"Oh, just the usual and I told her that Lucas is missing her, that he is becoming quite demanding about seeing her" Giles said sadly as he leant forward and took her hand in his, his eyes travelling over her face when her monitor started to beep again.
Across the room Buffy was watching him with tears in her eyes as she thought of her boys and barked a laugh when the monitor responded to her feelings.
"Well there you go then," Jameson said with a grin, "She must still be able to hear you and she agrees with the boys. She must miss them too"
Giles smiled at her and brought her hand to his lips, "Ok love, you win, as always, I'll bring them by at the weekend" he huffed a chuckle when the monitor sounded with the increase of activity, "What about the little one?" Giles asked Jameson.
"Oh you mean the surprise addition thanks to your night out?" Jameson laughed at his blush and lifted her chart from the end of her bed, "Doing fine according to this, growing nicely and not in any way affected by what is currently happening to Mum"
"What?!" Buffy screeched in shock, pushing away from the wall and staring at them both in surprise. "Where the hell was I when you found that out?!"
All three of their heads spun to the monitor when it gave a steady squeal as her heart rate shot through the roof.
XXXXXXXXXXX
"Fantastic, another addition to the Giles name" Edna said with a proud grin when Buffy relayed her news.
"Yeah coz a baby grown in a coma makes me feel less like an incubator" Buffy said sarcastically, rolling her eyes at Edna's chuckle before flopping back on her bed at home.
"You'll be awake soon honey. It'll be ok, you'll see" Joyce said patting her arm with a grin, "I wonder if it's a girl this time" she said looking over at Edna with a thoughtful expression on her face.
"Oh god I hope not" Buffy said, sitting up with a terrified expression on her face. "It could be a double of me or worse; Dawn" her eyes widened in fear and she dropped back down and covered her face with her hands, "Why can't anything normal happen to me? Am I just doomed to weirdness or something?" she asked, her voice muffled.
"Uh, is that a rhetorical question?" her Mom asked, her voice dancing with laughter.
"Ha ha very funny" she said, dropping her hands and rolling her eyes at her mother, "I can not deal with this right now"
"What exactly did Kendra say?" Edna asked, stepping forward and sitting next to her on the bed.
Buffy sighed and sat up, crossing her legs and picking at the cover, "Just that Annabelle is working on gathering enough power to attack me like this and that I need to watch the boys too and a Slayer dressed like she got fashion advice from a history book said that her spirit is connected to Eyghon" she said sullenly, "which is why I'm here for however long I can be"
"Bash seems to be feeling better since we told him that you will be ok" Joyce said, "we can always tell him to be careful, maybe you can even teach him something helpful Edna" she said looking over at the older woman hopefully.
"Hmm possibly," Edna said distractedly as her thoughts turned to what magic she knew that would be helpful, "whether I can or not doesn't change the fact that we never leave their side, we are always here"
"Yeah, why is that? Did you know this might happen?" Buffy asked watching her carefully.
"Yes and no," Edna told her, "I knew there was a possibility that Annabelle would find a way to come back and with her connection to Eyghon and what Magdalene discovered with her examination, well let's just say that my fears were proved correct and I find I am unwilling to leave my family unprotected"
"What did Magdalene discover? You never told me" Buffy said sitting up straighter and staring at her.
"Annabelle was covered in runes that she seems to have carved into her own skin," Edna said pausing at Buffys grimace. "The runes were used to connect her spirit to Eyghon but the scythe cut through the one that would have kept her strength intact in her afterlife"
"Good, still would have been great to get the heads up about this three months a go" Buffy said with a shake of her head. She sighed and leant back on her arms, "So she's been trying to regain her strength since then and when she thinks she's ready she's coming for me again?"
"Yes, or the boys believing that they'll be more vulnerable with you out of the way" Joyce said covering Buffys hand and giving it a comforting squeeze.
"Well, I'm not worried, much" Buffy said sliding to the edge of the bed and standing so she could pace out her nervous energy, "Willow can handle anything and Giles isn't exactly a slouch in the magic department and Bash is scarily powerful too plus he can see ghosts so that's an advantage she won't be expecting."
"All true my dear but," Edna started, standing and stopping her mid pace, "she wants you and Rupert to suffer for your imagined slights against her and she will stop at nothing to accomplish that. Only you can stop her"
"Let me guess; Powers that Be have put down their huge stompy foot and said so" Buffy said with a scowl, "maybe this time I tell them to go screw themselves"
Joyce chuckled and stood as well, "It doesn't work that way sweetie, you know this by now" she said pulling her in for a hug, "besides, we all know you can do this, nothing keeps you down for long"
"Destiny can bite me" Buffy pouted, smirking at their chuckle, "Ok so what can I do then? Kendra said she'd help, that they all would, but what can they do?"
"I think you'll find that Slayers, dead or alive, are capable of so much more than anyone knows"
Edna said with a secretive smirk.
Buffy narrowed her eyes at her and was about to ask her what that meant when she groaned and gripped her stomach. She looked up at the two women, her eyes wide with fear, then was pulled away from the house and back to her body.
She collapsed to the floor at the foot of her bed, gasping in pain as a cramp tore through her abdomen. She looked up and saw the wispy form of Annabelle standing over her body with the most evil but satisfied expression on her face that Buffy had ever seen.
"I warned you that I wanted you to suffer" Annabelle said, looking over at her as she slowly withdrew her hand from her stomach. "If I had known I would achieve more being dead I would have killed myself long ago"
Buffy grunted with the effort it took her to stand, "Wouldn't be so sure if I were you" she gasped out, leaning heavily on the end of the bed.
Annabelle giggled and whooshed behind her, gripping her throat and forcing her to stand upright, "You ruined my spell but I find that this is much more fun, look at him panic it's so delicious" she whispered in her ear, forcing Buffy to watch as Giles jerked awake and cried out for Jameson when he saw the blood soaking into her blanket from between her thighs.
Buffy bucked Annabelle off and swung around, her fist already raised to connect as hard as she could with her head, but Annabelle had vanished leaving the echo of a sadistic laugh hanging in the air. Buffy dropped back to the floor, gasping as the pain of losing her baby reached across the spiritual divide.
XXXXXXXXXXX
Giles watched Jameson perform the scan that confirmed she had miscarried, gripping her limp hand tightly with both of his as he fought back the urge to let his tears fall.
"I'm sorry Rupert, I don't know why but she has lost the baby" Jameson told him sadly, putting the wand back into its cradle against the ultrasound machine. He wiped away the jelly as a nurse removed the machine from the room then sat beside him after covering her with a fresh blanket, "We'll need to perform a D&C to prevent any chance of infection and I think it's best if you're not here to witness it"
"I'm not leaving her" Giles said, clearing his throat and shaking his head, "She shouldn't have to go through that alone"
"It wasn't a suggestion Rupert," Jameson said sternly. "Go to the cafeteria and get something to eat, or at least have a cup of tea" he said when Giles opened his mouth to argue.
Giles looked at Buffys face and blinked in surprise at the tear that was slowly making its way down the side of her face, "Why is she crying?" he asked softly, reaching over and brushing it away with his thumb.
Jameson cleared his throat and looked away, "I don't know" he whispered then stood and waited expectantly for Giles to do the same.
Buffy followed Giles from the room, not really wanting to stay and see what was about to happen, wiping a hand over her face to remove the tears that had fallen.
"Giles it's ok, I'll make her pay for that I promise" she said in a whisper, her heart breaking at the sight of him, his glazed eyes staring into space as he stood in front of the machine that made hot drinks.
He lifted the small plastic cup from the slot and turned mechanically towards the visitors room, sitting stiffly in an armchair and placing his tea on the coffee table in front of him. He sat there quietly for a full minute before he slumped and began to sob, one hand covering his face and the other clenched tightly into a fist over his stomach.
Buffy watched from the doorway feeling utterly helpless, her own tears flowing freely and unnoticed. She turned and ran through the hospital, not paying attention to where she was going until she arrived on the roof.
The stars above her blinking happily and the full moon bathing her in its glow unconcerned by the raw pain she released. The sound tearing from her throat was barely human as she shouted and screamed into the night unaware she wasn't alone.
Slayers surrounded her, filling the rooftop as they protected her in her grief, watching silently as she dropped to her knees and cried.