Scene XIV

Fire Brigade Guardhouse, Residence of the Asakusa Hikeshi

First District of the Commercial Wards, Fifth Block

As Konro tucked Hinata and Hikage into their futons and Beni ensured they had their cup of tea before bed, the girls' continued to insist on hearing the tale of the hikeshi and the flower maiden. The sideways, shit-eating grin Beni kept shooting him wasn't helping matters. Finally, after a valiant effort on his part, knowing he was out-numbered, out-gunned, and out-matched, Konro slowly admitted defeat. Clearly, any other story wouldn't be satisfactory.

"Alright," he relented with a sigh at their subsequent cries of victory. "Since, the two of you obviously don't understand the meaning of no."

"Jus' shut it and get on with it." Snarked Beni from his place on the floor beside Hikage. He lay, propped up on his side, with his head in one hand and appearing half-bored with the whole thing already. "Yer wastin' time."

"Yeah!" agreed the twins, their eyes bright with eagerness and their grins almost feral. "Get on with it, Konro!"

And so, Konro got on with it.

"Long ago," he began steadily. "In the days of Old Japan, long before The Great Cataclysm, there were the iroha 48 gumi. They were the first forty-eight alphabet groups who were charged with the protection of Edo by Tokugawa Yoshimune to fight the growing threat of fire raging across the city. Of these groups, the first was -"

"A!" Hinata answered excitedly, who was the stronger of the two at learning her letters.

"That's right." Konro nodded proudly, ruffling her hair. "And what's special about "A"?"

"A is for Asakusa!" Pipped up Hikage, very much the visual observer. "It's the hiragana letter on our matoi!"

"Right again." He said encouraging, offering Beni a secret smile over their heads.

"Smart kids." The young man signed, careful to keep his hands from being noticed by the twins.

"Very." Returned Konro with equal acuteness before continuing, "Many of the hikeshi here are suspected to be descended from the original group A, so it's a very important letter to us. Which is why we keep it, not just for Asakusa's sake, but for the ones who fought before us and whose fighting spirits protects us."

"Uh-huh!" Both girls nodded seriously, pulling the covers up more snuggly around their shoulders. "But, we don't need protectin', Konro. We're big now, ain't we Beni?"

The two girls looked over to Beni, each seeking approval and validation. It took far more self-control than should be warranted for Konro not to laugh at how desperate they were for his acceptance.

"Ah?" Beni blinked rapidly, taken aback by the sudden inquest. Then, a crooked grin tugged at the corner of his lip. "Yer kiddin', right? Ya two are still pretty tiny, ya know."

"Aww, Beni!" The two pouted, miffed by his dismissal. "C'mon! We're plenty big!"

"Not yet, ya ain't." Beni rebuffed without pause. He reached over and tapped each of their noses, causing Hinata and Hikage to squeak in surprise and rub at their faces. "Ya both still gotta ways ta go."

"Not fair, Beni!"

"Yeah, not fair!"

The young man rolled his eyes with a huff. "But, yer getting there. Jus' takes time, is all."

After a bit of back and forth between the three of them over whether or not Hinata and Hikage were "big enough", Konro finally rounded them up and settled the air between the tiny group. He continued with the basic setup of the history of the first 48 groups. How their jurisdiction mostly covered the territory of Edo west of the Sumida River and the basic hierarchy of the groups were made up. Certainly, most children would grow bored with the sheer amount of history used as a backdrop for a simple story about a hikeshi and a flower maiden's romance, but Hinata and Hikage weren't ordinary children. Any sort of history that had to do with the hikeshi was a subject worth listening to in their minds. Even if it was merely used as window dressing. By the time Konro had gotten through the more heavier aspect of the worldbuilding for the sake of the story's setup, Hinata and Hikage's bright, yellow eyes were growing heavier and heavier by the word. When, finally, the young hikeshi of the story caught his first glimpse of the lovely flower maiden from afar, both little girls were fast asleep with their tiny heads close together.

"Smooth." Benimaru deadpanned softly, rising quietly to his knees. Before he fully got to his feet however, he gently brushed aside a lock of hair which had fallen over Hikage's face and meticulously ensured all her covers were tucked in around her.

Konro was repeating the same routine with Hinata and, once both of them were satisfied their charges were deep in slumber and comfortable as could be, nodded towards the door. "C'mon."

Tiptoeing around the futon, they carefully made their way to the door, turning around at the last minute to offer the girls one last silent "good-night" before leaving them to their dreams.

"Sooo," drawled Beni, leaning with one arm propped up against the doorframe as Konro slid the door shut with a muffled thump!.

"So?" He asked casually, raising a long brow at the young man as he turned towards his own room.

Beni, however, had other plans apparently.

"So," The young man cut him off, sliding into Konro's path on the balls of his tabi-clad feet. A wicked, one-side grin was beginning to spread up his, usually, neutral face. "How's that story really end, huh?"

Konro paused, confused for half a second; then, realization took hold and he suddenly found the set of stairs to his left far more interesting. He shrugged a shoulder absently, "Who knows, Beni. Nothing's set in stone, after all."

"Riiight." Now it was Beni's turn to raise a brow in skepticism, obviously not buying Konro's poor attempt to sidestep the conversation. "It was jus' the fire that kept ya out so late? Not a certain flower maiden?"

He groaned, dragging a hand down his face in mild frustration. "I really don't see how this is any of your business, Beni. There are some things in my life which I would prefer to remain private."

"Tough shit." Beni's voice changed from brotherly snark to near biting anger and his expression, once again, morphed into something painfully unreadable. Yet, the new tension around his eyes and mouth gave away the building uncertainty of his mood. "This ain't one o' 'em."

Instantly, Konro sensed he was standing on the edge of a precipitous he had no prior knowledge of.

"And why is that?" He asked slowly, treading warily and with no small amount of concern.

"'Cause Kaede ain't jus' yer concern." Countered Beni, lips set in a firm line and his crimson, mismatched eyes narrowed in slight suspicion. "The way things've been, she could do with somethin' good right 'bout now. And if yer not livin' up ta that, then I wanna know 'bout it."

Konro frowned, concern melting into bewilderment. "Beni, I don't think I follow you-"

"Don't play dumb, Konro." Beni bit back, jaw tightening. "Did ya tell her or did ya run away? Which one, huh? 'Cause if ya ran, I swear I'm gonna-"

"I didn't run." He answered honestly and with firm directness, meeting the young man's gaze unflinchingly. "I spoke to her. Not about everything, but . . . It was difficult enough simply to . . . express how I felt."

Beni opened his mouth, as if in preparation to protest, before pausing for a moment. Then, he nodded sharply in approval. "Good. That's . . . good. Damn, I'd a whole speech an' everythin' in case ya decided ta be an idiot. Again."

"That right?" Konro inquired wryly, lips twitching in the effort to hide a growing smile. "Well, sorry to steal your thunder."

"Watch it," Beni snapped, but there wasn't much heat in it. "I can still give it ta ya. She's the closest I got ta a real sister, ya know. Ya hurt her an' I'll break yer face."

Ah. So, that was it.

Konro smiled freely now; expression softening in growing understanding. "I'll hold you to that. Man to man, yeah?"

He reached out, extending a backward fist of brotherhood, eyes shining with the sort of seriousness that comes with deep promises made from the heart. Beni glanced at it with a quiet thoughtfulness before his eyes flickered warily up to meet Konro's gaze directly. The young man seemed to pause, considering the offer, and it was the first time in a long while Konro could recall the young man giving something such a heavy form of consideration. Beni wasn't prone to hesitation often and, when he was, it rarely involved him at the core of things. Tsu-chan, mostly, or the twins. Perhaps, even Konro himself. It was what made Beni so well-suited to being a potential leader. While he didn't have much regard for himself, for the people around him, he would do near anything to ensure their happiness and well-being.

No matter what.

"Yeah, man ta man." Agreed Beni at long last, hardened knuckles smacking Konro's with a resounding air of finality. "Don't ya dare break her heart. I won't forgive ya if ya do."

"I expect nothing less," Konro admitted wholeheartedly. "In fact, I expect every bit and more. She's . . ."

He paused, a familiar warmth spreading through his veins as he pictured a pair of lovely, blue-bolt eyes, bright as day, within his mind.

"Yeah," murmured Beni and he glanced away, appearing sheepish and minorly uncomfortable. He rubbed at the back of his neck, but tried to mask the nervousness by making a small show out of executing a particularly exaggerated stretch. "Yeah, I know."

Konro smirked at the display. While, on the outside, it seemed the young man had no qualms at all about confrontation, he knew there were exceptions to the rule. Himself, was one of them. Likewise, he felt the same. Being at odds with one another was . . . discomforting. Yet, even Beni had his limits of what he was willing to put up with and he certainly made it clear that Konro's recent foray in handling his feelings for Kaede was something not to be tolerated. In all honesty, Konro couldn't be more proud to see this side of Beni coming into fruition. He was growing. As a man, as a potential leader, and as a deeply trusted friend.

"Thank you," Konro whispered lowly and he clapped the young man gently on the shoulder, forcing Beni to meet his eyes. "I mean that. Really. I need someone who's going to kick me in the ass when I'm making a fool of myself. Someone who's not going to lie to my face and tell me what I want to hear when I'm clearly in the wrong. Someone who's going to look after the people around me when I'm not there. I need that, Beni. More than you know."

Beni's eyes widened in mild surprise, then he shook his head in disbelief. "The hell? 'Course I know. Yer the one who made me Second, right? Ya think I'm gonna let ya do it alone?"

"No," he agreed. "But, I wanted to say it anyway. Hearing it . . . hearing it helps."

"Yeah, I guess so." Beni's tone shifted solemnly and he raised a hand to rub tiredly at his face.

"I'm glad you love her," Konro said gently and he didn't miss how the young man's face went slightly pink at the suggestion. "The fact you're willing to go so far for her makes me glad she has you. Especially, now."

"I'm not Tsu." There was no hiding the bitterness behind the words and Konro's heart fell at the sight of such conflict tugging on Beni's features. "I'm not really her-"

"That's bullshit." He cut across sharply, tone not broking any argument. "Do you honestly think she sees it that way? She loves you, Beni. She wants you just as safe and happy as she does Tsu. So, don't give me that. In her eyes, you're her brother. That's enough, isn't it?"

"I'm still a brat," Beni spat and the frustration building in his voice was undeniable. "She deserves better than a brat who-"

"I think we both need to get it through our thick skulls," began Konro with careful warning. "That Kaede doesn't have the patience for that kind of talk. I've got my fair share of lectures tonight about that very thing. We don't get to make that choice. If she wants us around, then that's that. She's stubborn and once she's made up her mind about a person, there's very little chance of changing it. Somehow, she's found the will and patience to put up with the two of us. I think we better cut our losses and be grateful for it, yeah?"

Beni huffed, clearly exasperated. "I still don't get how she can-"

"It's Kaede, Beni." Konro insisted lightly, a small smile pulling at his mouth. "True kindness isn't something that's easy to come by in this world. So, when you find it, it's important to recognize it for what it is. A gift. You already know it. That's why you want to protect her, right? Even from me."

The young man feel silent for a moment, his crimson gaze averted in deep thought. Finally, after a time, he spoke again. "I don't remember much anymore . . . 'bout my mother. Jus' a few things. But, Kaede . . . there's somethin' there, I think. I don't know. I jus' . . . I want her ta be happy. I want ta be . . . someone she can-"

He trailed off and the look of utter helplessness which crossed his face nearly had Konro on the verge of reveling all that their Master had previously hidden from the young man. Yet, he managed to force it down and swallow the words.

"I know," Konro offered instead as he squeezed Beni's shoulder comfortingly. "But, she already is. You'll never be a disappointment to her. I don't think that's possible. You think I'd have made you my Second if that was the case?"

Beni sighed heavily, running his hands down the length of his face. He looked flat out exhausted.

"I'spose not," He admitted with some begrudgement.

"There," said Konro, patting him solidly on the back. "You see?"

"Not really," Beni groused irritably, though it was half-hearted at best. "Not like I've got a choice, right?"

"Now, you're getting it."

"Gettin' what?"

"How a woman's mind works."

"Riiight. Who died and made ya the expert?"

"Well, I suppose that would have been my mother."

"Konro!"

"I jest, I jest."

"Geez," Beni growled, turning about and stalking down the hall to his room. "Yer lucky Kaede's not here. Don't think she'd like it if ya started claimin' ta be an expert on women's minds."

"Probably not," conceded Konro with a laugh as he watched him go. "Try and get some sleep, yeah? You still have to show me those training spots tomorrow after we make the collection rounds."

"Yeah, yeah." The young man waved him off with a backwards turn of his hand. "Don't stay up too late, yerself."

"Fair enough," he called back as Beni slid open the door to his room and slipped inside.

With that, Konro quietly crossed the floor to his own room, pulled back the shoji, and disappeared into the waiting darkness.

. . . . .

Once he readied himself for bed and laid out his futon, the events of the evening began to take hold within Konro's psyche. Chief of those being the rising concern for his men. The lack of funds and resources had always been an issue, even long before he was made Master. They had always managed just well enough and by the grace and love by the people of Asakusa. The cycle of co-dependence had, for decades, been the core of the hikeshi's ability to both serve and protect the town. Yet, now, that co-dependence was now, finally, beginning to crack. Fissures were opening at rates faster than Konro could close them and there was only so much he could do to hold back the flood before the dam would burst. They were on a collision course for disaster and it was now only a matter of time before Gozu's prediction came true. A firestorm was on the horizon.

The question now was when.

When would their strength finally fail?

When would their small numbers cease to be enough to hold up against the rage of fire and flames and the certainty of death itself?

When would everything they fought to protect crumbled to ashes at their feet while they watched on, unable to do nothing?

Konro wasn't a fool.

Not in this, anyway.

Their rag-tag group had limits to what they could accomplish. They needed funds. They needed equipment. They needed food and payment and lumber. They needed security for themselves and their families. They needed Asakusa to remain standing, even at the cost of their own lives. However, when those lives were paid, who next would rise up to replace them? Men with courage in their hearts and strength in their arms were also required . . . and there was so few of them to begin with. A hikeshi was a special breed of man. It was a calling, not merely a profession. At least, not to the hikeshi of Asakusa.

Perhaps, the Empire saw it differently. Well, to hell with them. Konro wasn't commanding Imperial lapdogs; he was leading men born and raised deep within the Proto-Nationalist traditions. What standards and rules and laws the Empire chose to lead their Special Fire Force was of no concern to him. However, he couldn't deny the one, sole advantage they had that Asakusa herself lacked: They had everything they could ever want to combat not only fires, but Infernals as well.

Unlike in Asakusa, the Empire had separated out their Fire Departments from their Special Fire Force. Two units handling two very different sets of issues yet, could be used jointly in combination should the need arise. Konro couldn't deny that it operated as a well oiled machine and with very little room for failure. They had Matchboxes, the latest advancements in fire fighting machinery, fireproof uniforms, money, and so on and so on. However, Asakusa was the smallest District within the Empire. Too small by their standards to warrant separate units (not that the hikeshi would approve of such a thing in the first place) and whose population prided itself on being self-efficient. Still, there was an old agreement made between the two long ago: Should Asakusa call out for aid, the Empire would be required to send it.

Because despite all the conflict between the Old Ways and the New, they were still apart of the Empire.

The time, Konro feared, was nearing that soon they may have no choice. The next fire could prove too much, the danger too great, and the potential for loss of civilian life and the lives of his men far too risky for him to take that chance. For all his pride as Master of the hikeshi and as a man of Asakusa, that pride was not so great that he would allow a possible tragedy to burn Asakusa down to nothing. He loved his town, his men, and his people enough to lay down that pride and allow the Empire to walk all over him if only so they could live. Whatever sacrifice he had to make, he'd commit to it. If it came down to it, he'd make that call. In the meantime, he needed to gather all the funds the hikeshi were owed in the last month. Then, he'd check his connections and call in a few I.O.U's for whatever he could get. If he could order new building material on what little credit they had, it might tide them over . . . at least, for now. In the end, he knew he was merely buying time and, before long, he wouldn't be able to even buy that.

He had to get this sorted out. Now.

Konro groaned, a long and drawn out sound of hopelessness which had him throwing an arm across his face as he rolled over. The futon gave under his weight and he buried his face within the depths of his pillow in the false hope of drowning out his compulsive thoughts. Yet, all he saw behind his eyes were flashes of color which mirrored the bright hues of flames and, suddenly, the smell of burning wood and flesh and hair filled his nostrils, forcing the clean air from his lungs and suffocating him. A brief panic overtook him, then; the fear of death and pain. The sight of charred bodies and burned out homes and the sounds of grief and despair. Wailing mothers, sobbing husbands, crying children, and the weeping of his men who bore witness to it day, after day, after day.

A shuttering breath, then a second, and a third. Within seconds, the moment passed and he was once again himself. It was fairly common for him to have these moments of panic when alone to himself in the quiet of the night. He knew the others had them. Even Beni. They were hikeshi, not gods. Humans. Strong ones, but human nonetheless. One couldn't do what they did without times of weakness and passing moments of panic and pain. Konro especially felt it. The warm breath of the lives he saved. . . . and the hard, cold weight of the lives of the ones he took. The numbness they felt in the moment of their deaths and the pain they experienced when realizing they would live. It was enough to make a man go mad.

"Your hands aren't as dirty as you think they are."

A pair of thin, delicate hands twisted elegantly in his mind's eye; hands whose fingernails were stained with soil and whose warm palms were scarred by rose thorns. The ghost of a memory echoed with the gentle press of fingertips against his jawline and the soothing touch of a pair of soft lips which skimmed against his own. The sound of a breathless hitch of air pulled at his recollection and, again, the sight of kind, blue-bolt eyes which gazed at him with unfathomable depths of both adoration and affection brought him further out from under the soul crushing weight of the duties he'd been charged with. The scent of flowers over took the ones of ash and flame, washing away the smell of death and replacing it with the reminder of living things. Green things. Beautiful things. The sort of things she nurtured into being by diligent hands which could, so very easily, be switched from caring and compassionate to unwieldy and unforgiving.

Strong hands. Firm hands. Hands which held him when he could no longer bare his own weight and who didn't hesitate at the presence of his weakness. How fearless those hands were, how gentle and kind, and yet strong enough to bare the weight of a hikeshi's heart like no other had before. Even when uncertain and unsure, they still offered him compassion and understanding. Even with the unanswered questions she undoubtedly had, still she gave him trust and loyalty. Even though he was most certainly unworthy of the kind of woman she was, still she allowed him access to parts of her heart she reserved for only herself. A beautiful gift. A sort of treasure no one could simply place in a bolted chest or a locked drawer.

"I don't want someone else. Ever."

No one else.

Just him.

Only him.

As faulty as a man he was, as misguided as he'd been in his youth, and as much pain and strife he'd once caused so many people, still it was him she wanted by her side. Sagamiya Konro, a man whose strength put him above most and whose size, at first glance, had others sweating bullets before getting to know him. He was no stranger to how those not familiar with him or who still held a poor opinion on his character saw him. The type of women he previously attracted certainly didn't help at the time, either. Not until he changed, and, even then, it wasn't truly him they found appealing. It was his size, his strength, and the dark features. His physical self, full of striking characteristics that even he couldn't deny, was what drew many towards him in the beginning. Afterwards, when he managed to get himself together and stop finding affection and acceptance in places where there truly wasn't any to be had, he swore himself off from romantic interests.

He needed time.

Time to heal and time to find himself again. He wouldn't be able to offer another person anything of substance if he didn't, first, find substance within himself. Even now, though he may reflect on his past self with shame and humiliation, he also knew how far he'd come on the path to change. He wouldn't ever be able to make that past disappear, but he could improve in the moment. For thirteen years he distanced himself from the life he'd once led and focused on becoming better, of improving his outlook on life, and pouring his heart into the work of the hikeshi. The arrival of Benimaru not long after he started his path to change, helped immensely. Seeing a physical visage of the path Benimaru would take if not guided differently encouraged Konro to be the sort of person a young man could grow to depend on.

He wouldn't allow the boy to fall down the path he had. Not on his life.

Over the years, he grew to be the sort of man he wanted for himself. After so much time and effort, he was starting to see improvements within himself and, when faced with a mirror, could now look upon his own face once more with a newfound pride. Not the arrogant sort but, the kind every person needs in order to hold themselves high and be satisfied with knowing who they are. Then, at twenty-eight, when he was just finding his feet, he met a pretty young woman with bright, blue-bolt eyes and a gentle smile. A year later, her friendship had become nigh irreplaceable. Now, eight years after the fact, he found a simple friendship was no longer something he could find contentment in. She had become so much more than that. As such, he worked even harder. Because he wanted to be the kind of man she could be proud of being with. Even with his faults and past, he still wanted to be better. To change. To be someone she could rely on and find trust in.

"Even if you were a bastard, that doesn't change how I feel."

She had no idea how true the comment on his linage was and yet, she simply hadn't cared. She threw it away, as if it was meaningless to her. Because, in her eyes, it didn't change a damn thing. He'd nearly wept when she said it, instead he simply kissed her. What else could he have done to show her how much her words meant to him? More words simply wouldn't have been enough. Not for something as profound as that.

Recalling that particular kiss, reawakened the memory another. Their intense kiss in the alleyway and everything which followed after. It came flooding back to him in a torrent of physical and emotional recollection. How she wouldn't let him go, even as he gently tried to pull away. She had sought him out, her hands holding him in place as she poured everything she had desperately into the act. How sheepish she looked afterwards, face dark with a deep blush, as if she had something to feel ashamed or guilty of. A concept that was simply absurd. He hadn't been bothered by the intensity of the kiss or her forwardness, simply that he was taken aback by it initially and that breathing quickly had become an issue. In fact, he rather liked that side of her; that bold and forward nature which made her even more endearing.

Amongst . . . other things.

Konro groaned, turning over on his back once more and running his hands down his face in frustration. It wouldn't do to go down that line of thought. Especially right now, in the middle of the night, while he was trying to sleep. When he needed actual rest and a good, deep sleep so he could deal with the growing concerns he would have to face in the morning. Thinking on the more physical aspects of their budding relationship was rather . . . soon.

Undeniable, yes. Yet, incredibly distracting.

A surge of guilt came along with it. He still needed to give her the opportunity to make a full and completely informed choice. He may have her affection for tonight, but there was still the chance that, once being made fully aware of his past choices, she would feel uneasy and perhaps, betrayed. He needed to wait until then, as it was only fair to her. No matter what his own wants amounted to, it would only be worth it if he could share them with her without the need of holding anything back. His past wasn't a simple notion, either. Even if she didn't immediately reject him, it would undoubtedly take time to come to terms with those truths (he dared not think about acceptance). He wasn't fool enough to think it would be a simple and painless process, on her part.

His physical needs was also a subject he hadn't dared to think of before now. Being a hikeshi didn't allow for much free time but what little he had, he spent guiding and aiding Benimaru in his younger years and learning from the Master on how to take over the position upon his death. Currently, being the Master didn't afford him much time for himself at all. Especially, outside his role of guardian for Hinata and Hikage. Even if, years ago, he'd been ready to throw himself back into the foray of romance, he highly doubted he would have proved to be an attentive or involved partner. Not because he remained the same idiot, but because of the nature of his profession. He would have also preferred a relationship of substance, after all, and not merely someone to spend lonely nights with. He'd had more than enough of that when he was younger and, ever since, it wasn't a habit he wished to ever take up again.

Several of the men, of course, had wives and long running partners. However, it took a particular level of sacrifice to love a hikeshi and Konro wasn't blind to that fact. There was the risk of death and injury along with a fair bit of loneliness. It was a lot to ask of another person and not everyone could cope with that amount giving, both emotional and physical. As such, whatever physical needs he'd encountered he simply took care of himself and left it at that. He hadn't given it much thought until now, as he lay awake in his futon with the not so distant memory of searching hands and desperate kisses.

Heat spread like wildfire throughout his veins and he tugged at the collar of his yukata, hoping the cooler air would kill off any lingering feeling of physical attraction. It wasn't fair to her. He wanted to be able to share that sort of physical vulnerability with her but only because she truly wanted to stay with him, despite all else. He didn't want to act on it before then. He wasn't even sure if she could look at him the same after knowing the sort of man he'd once been. He couldn't blame her if she chose to reject him, as much as it would wound his heart. As much as he'd have to live with the knowledge of knowing what it felt like to hold her, kiss her, and feel that potential intimacy, only for it to be torn away from him forever.

However, it would be no less than what he deserved if it came to it. He would have to accept it, no matter how painful, because he cared for her. So very much.

Konro sighed heavily, rolling over so as to bury his face within the pillow once more; the memory of gentle hands and delicate lips pressing against his skin in slow, intricate patterns almost taking on a life of its own.

It was a long time before true sleep finally claimed him.