It's the weekend again and we're about to get inundated with farm customers, so I will be offline for a few days. Gotta make the hay…and the money while the sun shines, and with prices increasing everywhere, we sorely need every dollar. Have a great weekend y'alls. Try to enjoy the sunshine if you can!
"Steve, there's a call for you on line three."
At least timing seemed to be in his favor this morning. They'd barely excited Mike office, the Lieutenant putting on his fedora and carrying his black overcoat over his left arm, when Tanner called him to his desk.
After the tumultuous last few days and their latest murder, any further evidence, no matter how gore, or perhaps even a witness statement, would be a welcome change.
Bracing his already queasy stomach for the phone call coming in, Steve nodded at Mike in mutual understanding and watched his partner walk over to Sekulovich to pass the time.
As he leaned forward to answer the phone, Steve reached for his notepad and pen, before lifting the receiver.
"This is Inspector Keller?"
"Stephen, honey, it's me. Please don't hang up the phone."
Steve drew in a deep breath, as the adrenalin shooting through his body nearly made him jump out of his skin. Lowering his head, as if to cower over the receiver, he glared over at Tanner, frustrated at the fact that the Inspector left out the small detail that the caller on the other end was his mother.
When Bill seemed busy making small talk with both Mike and Art, he turned back around and rubbed his forehead in agitation, before clearing his throat.
"Mom, why are you calling me in the office?", he asked as quietly as possible, hoping and praying that nobody would listen in on the conversation.
"Well, I can't call you at home, you're never there. Short of having dispatch get a hold of you, calling you in the office seems to be the only way to hear your voice. We miss you, Stephen. Is that Homicide Department keeping you that busy, that you can't even call your parents every once in a while, to let us know that you're ok? Are you still partnered with this…this Lieutenant Stone? Is he treating you well? Marty said that some of his officers mentioned he can be very stern. "
Steve felt the heat rushing up on either side of his neck, as the rapid pulse in his ears almost drowned out the conversation. Leaning closer toward the phone as if it would help keep the conversation private, he practically hugged his desk, his fingers clenching his nameplate with a death grip.
"I am in the middle of a murder investigation right now. Can't this wait? I…I can call you later when things…clear up."
"And how many times have I heard that?", his mother argued and he could hear his father mumble something in the background. Steve didn't need to hear the exact words to know that not much had changed about Marty Keller's condescending attitude toward his only son, "We just…you know, I hear more about you on the news than I hear from you, Stephen. That's…disappointing. I thought things would have changed by now. You're a grown man. Don't you think it's time to put the past behind you? I know your dad would love to have you back in his life."
Steve felt his mother's judgmental voice peel back every single layer of self-confidence he'd so carefully crafted over the last few years. Suddenly, he was reduced back to the college freshman whose family practically abandoned him over a conflict of interest…ethics…and morals altogether. And yet no matter how hard he tried, that past remained attached to him like a ball and chain, following him wherever he went, and regardless of how successful he became.
"Mom, I really can't talk right now. We have a very, very dangerous killer on the loose and we need to find him before he does any more damage."
Begging that his plea was enough to give him an elegant way out of a phone call that was quickly giving him an anxiety attack, Steve reached up and loosened the tie against his neck when he felt himself break out in a cold sweat.
"Well, you work Homicide, you always chase killers. I am sure you will have a minute to talk to your parents. We just wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday. I figured if I called Wednesday, you might be more cautious to answer your phone, so I thought I'd surprise you today. This way you can't avoid us, like you always seem to do. Thirty years is a milestone. I remember when the doctor handed me that little blue blanket and those big eyes were staring up at me…"
The gasps of air escaping his lips made him sounds like a freight train fighting its way up a steep mountain and Steve briefly considered to completely lose his manners and hang up the phone altogether, when his mother continued.
"Little did I know I would have two cops in the family! My husband, and my son!"
"Yeah, one who gets the job done and one who sits in the office and walks around in fancy suits all day…", his dad mocked laughingly in the background, just like he always did.
Hiding his obvious aversion behind a cheery façade and tough guy antics, only to pretend that the words ridiculing his son were meant as a joke, and that Steve was clearly overreacting when getting upset at the insults.
"You will have to excuse your father, he's had a couple of beers. Did you know, he received a promotion at work? He is now the Staff Sergeant of the Modesto Police Department. I am so proud of him. You should be too, Stephen."
"Yes, mom…", he sighed, his voice nearly breaking as he tried to hold back the emotions threating to bubble to the surface. With his head resting on the crease of his elbow and his back heaving in agitation, Steve never noticed Mike approach, until he felt a warm hand squeeze his shoulder empathetically.
Freezing in his spot, he glanced up to meet the caring blue eyes of his partner and best friend, scanning him worriedly. Both startled and embarrassed, Steve almost missed his mother as she continued to chitchat away on the phone.
"-any great birthday plans? It's not every day you turn thirty. If you're up this way, I can bake some of the oatmeal raisin cookies you like the best. You can bring your partner too! And then you guys could go out target practicing with your father, see who's the better shooter?"
Feeling the warmth of Mike's hand slowly calm him down, Steve dropped his head to his chest again, counting to three, before clearing his throat.
"Mom, I really need to get going."
"Don't you want to talk to your dad for a moment? He wants to wish you a happy birthday too!"
"No, that's alright.", he cut her off before he could get dragged into a conversation that would undoubtedly turn loud and hostile in the fraction of a second, "I will give you a call when this case is over with, promised. Talk to you later."
Hanging up the phone before she even had a chance to respond, Steve buried his head in his elbow as he felt his entire body shake violently. Knowing that by now everybody in the bullpen was more or less aware of the situation, only made things so much worse.
"Just take a deep breath…", Mike said soothingly, his hand never leaving his shoulder, "Remember what I said last night."
Deciding that he'd been tormented with the careless, one-way, self-centered type of conversation his mom liked to have for far too long, Steve slowly nodded before straightening back out and facing his partner with his features frozen in place, hoping to keep his expression unreadable.
Yet, as always, Mike saw right through it.
"Are you sure you're alright, Buddy Boy?", the Lieutenant asked genuinely and put his strong hands on both of his shoulders, as if to try and stop him from shaking.
Swallowing the last of the anger and frustration the phone call had brought on, Steve nodded slowly.
"Oh yes. Just the annual reminder of what a failure I am, that's all."
"Now you listen to me, Steve, and listen well.", leaning forward, Mike poked a finger at his chest, before pointing at the phone on his desk, "Don't you dare to let that sort of garbage talk eat away at your dignity. Somebody else's idea of you and what you stand for should never, ever define who you are. Not right now. Not ten years ago. Never. Only you can do that…So, don't you let bad parenting on their part be a life sentence on yours."