Loki awoke with a single ray of sunlight streaming in through the curtains, and hitting him directly between his eyes. Sigyn was still asleep, but she was clinging to his arm as if letting go would mean his certain demise. Gently, he extracted his arm from her grip, and started to sit up, when a searing pain shot through his chest, causing an undignified squeak to escape his throat, and him to flop back onto the pillows, panting through his nose. What in the nine… Carefully, he lifted his head to glance down at his bare chest. It was wrapped in white bandages, from a few inches above his navel, to his armpits. Suddenly the memories that had been fogged by sleep all came rushing back into his head.
"Oh, look at that." He murmured. "I've been impaled."
It hurt to breathe, after he'd tried to sit up, but it was no more than an inconvenient ache that he could most certainly live through. The blankets felt heavier than normal, and he pushed them back, and gently, oh, so carefully, slipped off the bed, and stood beside it. His teeth locked together to keep any embarrassing noises firmly within him. He stood there for a few minutes, on trembling legs, wondering what his next course of action should be. He probably shouldn't wash himself until he knew the exact condition of his wound. Norns, the room was spinning so much… he put a hand on the bedpost to steady himself. Sigyn was still sleeping, so Loki thought it would possibly make her happy for him to bring her morning meal to her while she was still sleeping. It was something he enjoyed doing on the rare occasion that he got up before her.
Experimentally, he released his grip on the bedpost, only for the whole room to spin sideways, and he found himself in a heap on the floor. That. Had hurt. Extremely badly. He bit his lip hard enough to taste blood so that he wouldn't cry out, and wake Sigyn. Maybe breakfast in bed was not such a good idea, after all. Sigyn's face suddenly appeared in his line of vision, and her soft hand cupped his cheek comfortingly.
"You always were a stubborn one, weren't you?" She asked, her voice torn between gentle concern and fondness. "What were you doing?" She gently lifted him back into bed, propping him up with pillows, and pulling the blankets over his legs.
"I don't know." Loki answered truthfully. His voice sounded surprisingly weak.
"You just didn't want to be in bed?" Sigyn guessed, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "That's fair, I suppose. Are you feeling strong enough to eat something?"
Loki gave her a look. "Well, I'm obviously not a very good judge of my own strength. I think I'm strong enough to walk around."
"Yeah, well, you're obviously not." Sigyn smirked. "Stay put, I'll be right back."
She jumped up, and danced out the door, leaving him alone. In the silence. Loki did not want to stay put. He fidgeted with his fingers impatiently. Where had Sigyn gone? What was taking her so long? He squirmed lightly, careful not to aggravate his injury. "Sigyn?" He called softly, in hopes that perhaps she'd only pretended to leave. Obviously, there was no answer.
"Sigyn!" He called again, a bit louder, but not enough for her to actually hear him. "Sigyn…" He repeated to himself, loving the way her name sounded. "Sigyn, Sigyn, Sigyn…"
He tapped his fingers against his leg in growing agitation. What was so important to her that she'd rushed off so suddenly? What had they even been talking about? It all seemed so long ago.
"Sigyn!" He called, this time for real. No answer. What if she'd abandoned him? What if she didn't love him, anymore? "Sigyn!" He repeated in a somewhat desperate tone, enjoying his small panic.
"Siiiiiigyyyyyyn!" He shouted, just as his wife opened the door, the picture of concern. "What is it, Melleth?" She cried, rushing over to his side. "Are you hurt?"
He smiled up at her, his eyes dancing with mischief. "I'm bored." He replied simply. Sigyn face-palmed, shaking her head in exasperation. "You're hopeless, is what you are." She groaned.
"I don't like to stay put." Loki pouted, crossing his arms lightly over the bandages. "It's highly tedious."
"I can't even fix your breakfast without you hollering, in here." Sigyn sighed, sitting on the bed, next to him. "What am I going to do with you?"
"Pet me nicely, and feed me carrots?" Loki guessed.
"Not if I can't go get them!" Sigyn made a helpless gesture. Then she reached over to the nightstand, and handed him his phone. "Here, amuse yourself."
"Ooh, goody!" Loki grinned. "Technology!"
She rolled her eyes fondly, and trotted to the door. "I'll be back, soon." She assured him. As soon as she closed the door, he turned on the phone, and quickly sent her a text.
Loki- What are you doing?
He could practically hear her groan from the kitchen, and giggled softly to himself in triumph, typing in another text.
Loki- O.O
She almost immediately responded.
Sigyn- I'M GETTING YOU YOUR BREAKFAST, YOU IMPATIENT BUMPONALOG!
Loki smirked. Tony was right. There is no faster texter than a frustrated woman.
Loki- Do you miss me?
Sigyn- I'VE BARELY EVEN LEFT OUR ROOM! IT HASN'T BEEN FIVE MINUTES! YOU'RE LITERALLY THIRTY FEET AWAY FROM ME!
Loki- I see…
Loki- Well, I miss you.
Sigyn- -_-
Loki- A great deal.
Sigyn- Well, miss me quieter!
Sigyn- I'm wasting time I could be using to get you food by texting you.
Loki- My apologies, Beloved. I'll leave you to it, now.
Sigyn- Thank you.
Loki- Any time.
Sigyn- Fake news.
Loki- I am the god of fake news.
Sigyn- Hush.
Loki- Very well. As you wish.
Loki- I'm going to be so quiet, you won't even know I'm here.
Loki- See how quiet I'm being?
Loki- No noise, coming from here.
Loki- All is silent.
Loki- …
Loki- Silent Loki, holey Loki….
Loki- (See, because I'm full of holes)
Sigyn- BE QUIET!
Loki- :D
Loki shook with laughter, trying to contain himself so he wouldn't hurt his wound, to no avail. He watched the clock carefully, until it had been exactly one minute, then sent his next text.
Loki- Are you thinking about me?
Sigyn- LOKI, I SWEAR, I'M PUTTING MY PHONE IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP!
Loki raised his eyebrows at the extremely drastic threat. Better not to risk it, he supposed.
Loki- I'm sorry, but I must know… would you turn the garbage disposal on?
Sigyn- AAAAAAAAAAAARGH!
Loki snorted with mirth, clutching his injury, as silent tears streamed from his eyes. Sigyn opened the door, and came in, balancing a tray on her hip. She looked a cross between amused, and very not amused. "'Holey Loki'? Seriously?" She smirked, setting the tray down beside him. Loki held his breath so that he wouldn't explode in laughter again.
"You need help." He shook her head. "Eat up."
Loki cheerfully dug into the oatmeal. Typically, it wasn't one of his favorite foods, but this morning it tasted pretty good. "You said you had a surprise for me?" He mentioned. "I'm back. What's the surprise?"
"Oh, yeah." She grinned. "I'm pregnant."
Loki choked on his oatmeal. Sigyn smiled smugly as Loki coughed and sputtered. "Y-Y-You're WHAT?!" He gasped in shock. Sure, he'd had a hunch, but he hadn't expected it to be the surprise.
"With child." Sigyn repeated. "Again."
Loki stared at her with wide eyes. "Well. That… changes things."
"I'd hoped so." Sigyn admitted. "I know, you'll still have to go, but at least this postpones it, right?"
Loki closed his eyes in defeat. "You're merely postponing the inevitable, Love. I have to go. No matter the… suffering it causes you. Because, in the end, it will be less than what you will get if the Master finds you."
Sigyn sighed in disappointment. "So… you're still leaving?"
"As soon as I'm healed." Loki nodded. "Unless… you can think of a better idea?"
Sigyn chewed on her lip for a while. "What if… you don't leave, just pretend to be someone else? I mean, your dying would be the perfect cover. You died, and, maybe, I get a job? And I meet a particular man at my job, and fall in love, and eventually we get married, but, in truth, it's you all along?"
Loki furrowed his brow. "It's a good idea… but… what about when Sleepy gets bigger? She'll have some little friend she thinks she can trust, and spill the whole story. And there's not enough margin for error. If you slip up in public, and call me Loki, the Master will be on our tail faster than you can say rubber baby buggy bumpers."
"Rubby baby…" Sigyn attempted. "I mean, rubber bagy… rubber baby bubby bumbers? Okay, I get your point."
Loki grinned sadistically, before getting serious, again. "It won't be extremely fast, but fast enough. Fast enough that I won't have time to run. Fast enough that the Master will be able to use you as leverage. But I think you might be on to something. Disguising myself as someone… that's actually somewhat brilliant."
"Somewhat?" Sigyn raised an eyebrow.
"Alright, it's downright brilliant." Loki amended.
Sigyn flipped her hair happily. "Yes, yes, I know, I'm so brilliant."
Loki grinned, and fondly rolled his eyes. "Let me think, though. Who could I impersonate...? That the Master would never suspect? Or, possibly… be intimidated by…"
"Who is Than-I mean, the Master, afraid of?" Sigyn wondered. "Is there anyone?"
A slow smile crept across Loki's face. "The one thing he wanted to know, the whole time I was in the Sanctuary… was how to defeat Asgard. Its' weakness, its' numbers, its' strong points. He may not be afraid of it, persay, but he definitely sees Asgard as a threat."
"You can't mean…" Sigyn gasped. "You wouldn't!"
"Odin it is!" Loki clapped his hands briskly.
Sigyn face-palmed. "What are you going to do with the real Allfather? Stick him in a nursing home?"
"Why not?" Loki shrugged, before wincing from the movement to his torso.
"I literally just spit out the stupidest idea I could possibly think of," Sigyn groaned. "And you decided to swallow it."
"Hook, line, and sinker." Loki stroked her cheek affectionately. "That's my Sigyn. So smart she can't even be stupid when she's trying."
Sigyn narrowed her eyes at him. "I have to make up for all the stupid coming from you, I guess. I can see it, now. You knock Odin out, stick him in a nursing home, and as soon as he wakes up, and figures out where he is, there's one glorious blast of Odinforce, and he's the only thing standing in twelve square miles."
"Naturally, I'd wipe his memory. Temporarily, of course." Loki tapped his chin thoughtfully. "Although the Odinforce thing would be pretty amusing, too."
"I think this is a bad idea." Sigyn understated.
Loki nodded. "Yes, it is, Minion. It's a terribly bad idea for the greater good of bad."
Sigyn dropped her face onto his knees. "Not this, again."
Loki carded his fingers through her red hair. "Oh, you don't know what's good for bad."
She turned to look up at his pale face. "Once this goes horribly wrong, and the nine realms burn to the ground, and you somehow create a time rift, and I never exist, and someone steals my bike, fully expect me to blame you."
Loki nodded somberly. "I'd be disappointed if you didn't. Especially if you didn't exist."
There was a moment of silence, before Loki spoke up, again. "How's Va?"
"As far as I know, still conked out." Sigyn sighed. "He really tired himself out, last night. Of course, I don't know if he's actually awake yet, because somebody wouldn't stop pestering me to return to their room."
Loki giggled mischievously. "I hope you realize how entirely un-sorry I am."
Sigyn smirked up at him. "You need help."
"Correction." Loki blinked sleepily, smiling gently down at her. "I need you."
Sigyn smiled, watching his face as he slowly nodded off, his eyelids getting heavier and heavier, until he laid his dark head onto the clean white pillowcase, and knew no more.
Well, no more than strange dreams of Odin levelling Manhattan with an army of light-saber-wielding pickles.
AaAaAaAa Lokigyn's relationship is so cute!
Kudos to the Human who catches the Frozen reference!
TheOnlyHuman.