Chapter 30: Neil's Birthday

I snapped my head up when I thought I heard a knock at the door. I sighed in disappointment when I realised I had imagined the sound. I looked up at the wall clock impatiently, the seconds were ticking closer to 1900. I was barely containing the excitement that was bubbling up. The kitchen table was simply set, with a plain black and silver trimmed tablecloth. Two tall silver candelabras stood in the middle and I'd laid out the fancy silverware that rarely saw the light of day, inherited from my Grandmother. My Mother's Mother, a woman I vaguely remembered from the swirling distant memories of childhood.

I'd wanted to do something more extravagant, being the first special event me and Neil would be sharing as a couple. However, being Neil's birthday celebration I'd opted for plain yet elegant. A three course meal was neatly arranged around a vanilla birthday cake ringed with strawberries. All his favourites: Stew for the starter, shrimp chilli for the main & egg custard for dessert. The layout looked intimate, I felt a thrill go through me as I imagined what was to come. A romantic scene was set with the farmhouse filled with candles and fairy lights.

At ten past seven I was starting to worry, wondering if I could childe the birthday boy for being late. I was beginning to fret about the food getting cold when I heard Hero howling and barking outside. I smiled in anticipation, knowing who it would be. Neil opened the front door and quickly shut it behind him, he stomped snow from his boots and shook flakes from his damp hair. Hero whined and scratched at the door. I hesitated for a second before hardening my resolve, tonight I wasn't going to indulge him by letting him inside.

Neil took off his boots and hung up his coat, he wore black jeans and a grey knitted jumper. "Sorry I'm late." He mumbled as he turned to face me. His face dropped and a blush instantly bloomed across his face and neck. Neil scratched the back of his head and diverted his gaze. I smiled knowingly. I was wearing the red cheongsam dress with my hair piled on top of my head.

Neil tucked my chair in before walking around the table to take his own. His eyes widened and lit up. "Hey, what's the deal here? Did you make all this? Isn't that something."

"It was nothing." I muttered. My face flushed with heat, feeling self-conscious I looked down at the table cloth and began to pick at the silken fabric. The complement had been said easily, casually. We'd been dating less than a week and I still wasn't used to Neil's sweet side, only shown when we were alone and it always caught me off guard. Feeling flustered I tried to regain my composure. I looked up to catch Neil watching me, smiling. Any composure I'd mustered fell away, my cheeks grew warmer and I smiled tentatively back. His open smile caught my heart out, it's rhythm stuttering. Since we'd confessed he smiled more & scowled less, he was more relaxed and let his armour down. It made me happy that he shared that part of himself with me, only me. It made me feel special.

If Neil noticed my embarrassment he kept it to himself. "Everything looks great. Let's hurry up and dig in."

A loud rumble filled the room, we laughed when we realised the sound was coming from my stomach. At the invitation I greedily made a start on the stew, trying not to slurp from the large spoonfuls I was taking. I could feel Neil watching me but I was too famished to be overly bothered. He chuckled at my eagerness and when I looked up he was dunking a piece of bread into his bowl. I shrugged, etiquette was overrated.

Neil approached me from behind and placed his hands delicately on my hips. I felt Neil's lips brush against the top of my head, I relaxed under his touch. I took off my rubber gloves and pulled the plug with a pop, the water swirled and drained away. I eyed the cutlery and crockery stacked precariously on the drainer, I decided that the drying up could wait until later as I grabbed a kitchen tea towel to wipe my hands. Something much more interesting was waiting to catch my attention. I turned around and wrapped my arms around Neil's waist, he wrapped his around mine and squeezed me gently. Neil looked thoughtful and I pouted, guessing his line of thinking. "No chores on your birthday." I said sternly.

Neil raised his eyebrows but decided to keep the peace. "If you insist." He agreed easily. The candlelight had been extinguished and the main lights turned on. I could see Neil bright and clear, through the meal his face had only been illuminated by a soft glow but now it was free of shadows. I smiled, content. He looked happy and comfortable, there was no sign of his walls anywhere. Neil kissed my forehead. "Today's food was outstanding. Thanks a lot for remembering my birthday."

I blinked in surprise. Did he really think that I wouldn't remember? I felt a pang of sadness and tried not to let it show, not wanting Neil to mistake the empathy I felt for sympathy and getting rattled. I knew he despised anyone feeling sorry for him. But his attitude made me worry. Did he think it was that unusual for someone to remember, to celebrate his birthday? I frowned but realised this was normal for Neil. He wasn't used to being loved, to having a significant other. Just as his intimacy was a surprise to me mine must also be to him. I ran a hand through Neil's thick unruly hair. "You don't have to thank me, Honey. I love you."

I repressed a sigh. It was only natural to want to commemorate the birthday of a person that you loved but I knew that it was a big deal for Neil. It didn't come easy to him and it was hard to take things slowly when all I wanted to do was shower him with affection. Neil jerked his head away from my hand and his arms stiffened. He looked sullen and leaned away from me. "Why do you have to keep making me uncomfortable with those lines? Is this also part of the celebration."

Neil was withdrawing away from me but I wasn't going to let him. He stepped back out of my embrace, my arms fell away limply. It was only a step but I felt the sudden distance like a splash of cold water. I took Neil's hand and squeezed it firmly, I was determined not to let him run away from me. "You have people who love you Neil, who want to celebrate your birthday with you. If you'd let them." I explained gently. I thought of Rod and Dunhill. Neil had barely accepted a card from them, a whisper of 'Happy Birthday'. Neil kept the date of his birth a secret from as many people as possible but the Village was too small for most people not to know. That and Rod. I smiled as I remembered him practically singing Happy Birthday from the plaza this morning before Neil had quite bluntly told him to put a sock in it.

"I only want to celebrate with you." Neil mumbled, refusing to look me in the eye. My heart constricted, how sweet. A smile instantly broke out across my face, so wide it made my cheeks hurt. I let go of Neil's hand and wrapped my arms instead around his neck, I buried my face in his chest and squeezed him fiercely. Neil gasped and I felt him hesitate, his hands hovering above my waist. I refused to let go and after a few moments Neil returned my embrace, he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me tightly against him. Neil placed his cheek on the top of my head. I closed my eyes and sighed in contentment, not wishing to be anywhere else. "Well, what can I do?" Neil said into my hair, I felt that he was smiling. "I love you too."

I laughed into Neil's chest, feeling so happy I felt like I could float away. I cherished the four little words, knowing how hard they were for him to say. "Even after I made you eat your birthday cake?" I asked playfully. I leaned back to catch him grimacing.

Neil pulled me back towards him with one arm firmly held around me, with the other he stroked the shape of my lips with the pad of his thumb. I saw the spark of desire in his eyes, the hunger. Heat spread through my stomach in response and I pulled myself tighter against him eagerly. "Even then." Neil whispered, his warm breath blowing across my face.

His nose skimmed against mine. I placed a hand on the back of his neck and pulled him down towards me. I captured his lips with my own, the taste of him stirred a familiar longing. Reluctantly I broke away gasping for air, I felt light-headed. Neil looked at me with dark eyes, his hair was even more dishevelled. I placed a hand on his check. "Happy Birthday."

Neil didn't reply, he only leaned down to kiss me once more. I smiled against his lips. I'm so glad we could celebrate like this. May we celebrate many more to come.