Satine's eyes flickered open and, for a drowsy moment, she could not remember where she was. As her eyes slowly began to adjust to the dim light she began to recognise the slightly shifting shadows characteristic of torchlight, the veins and rings of the wood that made up the room she was lying in. The scent of wet leaves and soil filled her nostrils and she felt an unfamiliar softness caress her skin.
It was then that Satine sat up with a jolt, every muscle in her body screaming in protest at her sudden movement. The materials that wrapped her body fell to the ground, revealing its bare form. She quickly brought one around herself, a blanket of chestnut coloured fur. Her heart pounded in panic, unable to remember what events had led her to lie swaddled in furs in the nude. Her racing heart jumbled her thoughts further, memories of the torments she'd had to endure under the Donari come back to her in flashes of pain, causing her to hyperventilate as she rubbed her palms against her arms.
Had she been drugged?
Was that the reason why she couldn't remember anything?
Could that explain the fog that refused to dissipate from her mind?
"Calm yourself." A soft voice whispered out of the darkness to Satine, causing her to jump as she looked up, finally noticing she was not the only one in the room. "Remember, you are safe here." Satine took a moment for her eyes to adjust enough to make out a pale, silver haired woman with a sash across her eyes.
Satine's eyes widened in recognition, this was the woman who had drugged her… no, not drugged her... she'd given her something made of berries to drink. As the woman cautiously moved closer, the event's that followed her torture began to return to Satine as well… they had escaped! They were no longer with the Donari, but had been led to the captive's- Lie Ren's village. This woman must have been one of them, a Miraluka she believed they called themselves?
"Right." Satine murmured to herself, as she tried to calm her breathing and heart rate, still wrapping the fur tighter around her body. She cringed in sudden pain as she felt a thickened, dried concoction across her back, causing a persistent dull pain to throb across her body, reminding her of the several injuries she'd received. Still trying to hold the material to her chest, she reached towards her back, feeling the crumbling sensation of dried leaves against her fingertips. "You… you helped heal me?"
It was more of a statement then a question as more of the events prior to her losing consciousness came back to Satine. The lashing she'd received at Balik's hand, she could still feel the scabs and wounds as she moved but, miraculously, they seemed much smaller, nothing but scabs and healing tissue remained.
"Thank you." She continued, looking at the woman with renewed gratitude.
"I wouldn't be a very good healer if I couldn't do my job when needed." The woman smiled, moving to sit at Satine's side. "But I wasn't the only one who helped."
Satine tilted her head in confusion as the woman pointed with her chin to a corner of the room that had not been in her line of vision. Sitting in the corner, a pelt of grey fur haphazardly draped across his chest and legs was Obi-Wan, fast asleep. His head was tilted slightly to the side, his back leaning against the wall in a position that most definitely wasn't comfortable to sleep in.
"He's very dedicated." The woman continued to explain. "Wouldn't leave your side and has been using the Force to try heal you until it knocks him out cold after."
"He has? I didn't even know that was possible!" Satine murmured, unable to look away from the sleeping man, even in sleep the weariness of the exertion could be seen in the shadows that deepened his features.
"He's a novice, but he's trying." The Miraluka continued to explain. "He has a long way to go before he's healing any serious wounds but he had the right motivation to start."
"I always cause him such trouble." Satine sighed, causing Jem'ah to shake her head in response.
"You two make make quite the pair."
"What is that supposed to mean?" Satine countered, silently wondering if there were any clothes around, feeling even more self conscious at the fact Obi-Wan was there and she still had no clothes on.
"Well, you think you've caused him trouble and he thinks he's failed as your protector." Jem'ah said, scooting closer to Satine's back with a small bowl containing a darkly coloured paste. With gentler hands than Satine had anticipated, she moved the furs slightly to the side and began to peel off the dired medication from her back, the suddenly revealed skin tingling against the cold air. "I have never seen two people more made for each other."
"It's not like th-" But Satine almost bit her tongue as a fresh layer of even colder paste was carefully spread upon her bare back.
"Men are oblivious to things of the heart." The woman countered, ignoring Satine's discomfort. "That is why we spell it out for them, but if you yourself need help figuring it out…" But she paused, as if realising something obvious. "Unless it's not reciprocated? Then I'm very sorry for overstepping but you really need to let that boy down gently!"
"It's not that." Satine blurted out, her eyes quickly looking at Obi-Wan where the steady rise and fall of his chest told her he was still sound asleep, oblivious to the conversation the two women were having. "It's complicated."
"All the best stories are." The woman admitted, continuing with her work on Satine's back, silently pleased at how well the overall injury had healed. There would be scarring, but that was to be expected from the depth and severity of the injuries she'd had to work with. "Two young people, clearly interested in each other, traveling alone?"
"I don't know what you are trying to imply the two of us have done, erm." Satine faltered, realising she didn't know the healer's name.
"Jem'ah." The woman quickly answered. "And I'm not implying anything, just that things seem pretty simple to me."
"Well that's because you don't know the whole situation." Satine tried to explain, pulling the furs up to her chin, unsure how she had found herself in such a situation, healing from torture felt far more comfortable than this conversation.
"That you're the Duchess of Mandalore and he's a Jedi? Yeah the boy talks a lot when he gets bored. I think he likes to listen to his own voice, it calms his nerves."
"First off, that's rather rude." Satine began, as she felt fresh leaves being pressed over her now ointment coated back. "Secondly, I shouldn't have to explain why it's complicated if you already know so much."
"He fancies you, you fancy him. The math is very simple."
"Why are we even discussing this in the first place?" Satine hissed. "I don't know you."
"Because I saved your life and credits are useless here in the forest so I'll take my payment in gossip." Jem'ah bluntly explained. "Also, you didn't deny it."
Satine puffed out her cheeks, for this woman to be a healer, she was rather difficult but, she had to admit, it felt nice to speak to someone about this, whatever this was. Under normal circumstances she would have spoken of such things with her sisters but now they had seemed childish, even trivial, definitely not things to be discussed during a war. However, Satine also wondered if this was the healer's way of trying to help her forget her past torment for a few moments. Still keeping a careful eye on the sleeping Padawan in the corner, Satine obliged to the woman's whims, but she'd be damned if the man in question heard any of what was said.
"Even if I didn't deny it, it doesn't change the fact that he is Padawan, a Jedi in training. It is in their teachings to shun physical attachments, especially those between others."
"And you are a duchess, fated to be with a man of higher class?"
But Jem'ah was surprised when Satine shook her head at her words. "I was meant to, before this war began. I was promised to a man I didn't care for to stop this war. However, he's now dead and war rages across my planet. Status and titles are simply words, I know that now. Has Obi-Wan told you I even renounced my title at some point? They returned it to me just as quickly."
"So it's all him?" Jem'ah wondered, attaching the last leaves across her patient's back, studying their waxy sheen in the torchlight with satisfaction.
"Well, for one thing, I'm not sure that my feelings are reciprocated."
"Honey, I can't see and I know the answer to that question." Jem'ah laughed at Satine's attempts to make up excuses.
"Well that doesn't change anything. He is still training to be a Jedi, I refuse to get in the way of that."
"So you won't even give him the choice?"
"I refuse to get in his way. He will make a great Jedi some day."
"I must admit, I don't think I'd have been so reasonable at your age." Jem'ah admitted with a chuckle, adjusting her position so she was now looking at Satine rather than her back. However the latter still would not allow her attention to deviate away from the sleeping Padawan.
"It would be selfish of me to do otherwise." Satine admitted, her heart aching as she finally voiced the thoughts that had plagued her heart for so long.
"Everyone has the right to be selfish at times."
"I am the Duchess of Mandalore, people may argue I've been selfish all my life." Satine admitted, remembering the comfortable life she and her family had been living before the war. It had only been a couple of months but it felt like almost a lifetime ago now. "I have no right to get in the way of his dreams."
"Dreams can change." Jem'ah admitted, all scrutiny lost from her voice. "And there's nothing wrong with that."
But Satine shook her head. "I've taken too much from him."
"So if something had to happen, he'd have to take the first step." Jem'ah finished, as if reading Satine's thoughts.
Satine looked at the older woman, confused as to why she was being so open with this stranger. Yes, she had saved her life, but that did not make her privy to her feelings like that. However, looking at the Miraluka, Satine came to realise why she felt so comfortable speaking of such things with her… it was because she reminded of her mother. This realisation caused an old pain to ache again, as it sometimes did when she remembered a more distant time. Her mother had passed away when she was young, and never had she had the opportunity to speak to her of such things, to pass on the advice a mother would to her daughter. Not for the first time Satine wondered what she'd say if she knew. Would she tease her? Give her words of wisdom or warn her of the pain a broken heart could bring? Would she even like Obi-Wan? Deep down Satine thought her mother would have, much more than Till Tat for sure. Maybe, deep down, she wished she'd had the chance to speak to her as she did now with this woman. But she had been deprived of such possibilities too long ago to complain of its unfairness now.
"Yes." Was Satine's reply, pushing back the tears her mother's memory had conjured.
"Then you may lead a very lonely life." Jem'ah said, matter-of-factly.
"I won't mind as long as he is happy." Satine concluded, a sad smile spreading across her face as she watched the first inkling of sleep begin to disappear from Obi-Wan's face, his previously still body shifting as the discomfort of his position most likely began to become more obvious.
He grunted in annoyance, flexing his shoulders as he tried to adjust his posture, even in the torchlight Satine could see his eyelids began to move. He'd wake soon enough and this conversation would vanish into the sands of time.
"But I feel, he may not truly be." Jem'ah whispered wisely, in a voice so low Satine almost missed her final words. The woman then continued, in a louder, more teasing voice. "Didn't your fancy temple never teach you to not look at a woman's naked body without her permission?"
And to emphasise her words, she tossed one of the smaller pelts at the man, hitting him in the face with ease.
Obi-Wan woke with a start at Jem'ah's crude actions. Every joint in his body groaned in pain, arguing against his choice of sleeping position.
"W-what?" He muttered, blinking away the last remnants of sleep that obscured his vision. It had been several days since he'd arrived at the village and the healer had taken a peculiar liking to the Padawan, namely in turning him into the butt of her teasing. But, as the flecks of sleep slowly disappeared and his mind continued to slowly clear, Obi-Wan soon began to realise that it wasn't just Jem'ah that was watching him.
"Satine!" He blurted out, jumping to his feet and almost falling over the blanket as it tangled itself around his ankles.
Considering the conversation Jem'ah and Satine had just been having, the fact that the Padawan had been bested by a blanket, the duchess couldn't help imagine Bo's disapproving face as, with arms firmly crossed she'd say.
So this is the idiot?
But then Luna would see the little smile Satine was trying so hard to hide and would whisper back.
Yeah, he is.
"You're awake!?" Obi-Wan continued, having freed himself from the blanket and took a step closer to Satine, his face flushing as he finally realised what Jem'ah had said. His eyes averted as he continued to ask."How are you feeling?"
"I feel a lot better." Satine confirmed, wrapping the furs tighter around her body to ease the awkwardness Jem'ah's words had created between the two. "And I've been told you had a lot to do with it."
"It was nothing, Duchess." The Padawan sheepishly answered, looking at a small, maroon shelled insect as it made its slow journey across the room. "I was only doing m-"
"Obi, please look at me."
Obi-Wan was taken by surprise, it was rare that Satine used the pet name he'd given her permission to use during his disease induced fever. The Padawan tentatively raised his eyes, directing his attention back to the woman swaddled in furs. Hey pale eyes met his intently, capturing them and forbidding them to look anywhere other than at her.
"Thank you." She said, trying to put as much meaning in those two words as she could. "You may say otherwise, but you've gone beyond what was expected for your mission… I am eternally grateful."
The intense air between the two lasted a few moments longer, Satine had not intended to sound so formal but, in the moment, she could not think of any better way to express her sincere thanks for all her friend had done for her.
Obi-Wan smiled, and just like that the tension and awkwardness vanished as if it had never existed. It was a small yet dashing smile, that softened his eyes and caused Satine's heart to miss a beat.
"You don't need to thank me, Satine, for doing something I chose to do." He answered, gently.
Out of sight of the two youths, Jem'ah shook her head, a small knowing smile playing on her lips.
Thank you so much for reading! I hope you all enjoyed the update and feel free to drop a comment 😉 I'll see you next week 😁