A/N: [bleep bleep bleep etc. you get the point] i forgot to post yesterday. Oh my goodness. Ok. There is a good side, my chapters and days posted may catch up with each other. So here you go, a long segment to make up for yesterday. Oh, and immm not posting tomorrow since my chaters were 2 ahead of my days. But I will do my best to have full length chapter of either Plan Omega, Dark Marauders, or Morrigan Returns 2

Ron Weasley: You've got to start standing up to people, Neville.

*Neville chops off Nagini's head with Gryffindor's sword.*

Neville's classification of people is a bit off. He classifies Nagini and Voldemort as people. Well, go big or go home (in this case or go to school).

A Harry Potter AU in which potions is taught by Gordon Ramsay

"YOU DRAUGHT OF LIVING DEATH COULDN'T KILL A FRUIT FLY!"

"YOU PUT SO MUCH GINGER IN THAT POTION IT TASTES LIKE A WEASLEY!"

Plot twist, that was amortentia.

Headcanon where Harry and Ginny have triplets and name them James Fred Potter, Sirius George Potter, and Remus Colin. (Colin because the camera thing… also because he deserved to have Harry Potter's kid named after him. Not Snape. Colin. I have no regrets.)

And McGonagall's like. No. Not again.

Tumblr user wolfstarforever (credit where it's due):: James faced Voldemort without a wand, right? What if he got one punch in before he died? What is James punched Voldemort''s nose off?

Brief description of the Hogwarts Houses ptx

Objective: Playing the floor is lava

Gryffindors: *gets a cardboard hat, and blanket cape and a mop sword* *jumps on chair* FIGHT ME LAVA!

Ravenclaws: *just stands there* well, wouldn't the floor burn if the floor was lava? So jumping on furniture would be very inefficient.

Slytherins: *lays on the floor* *does snow angels* *has a smug face. They are doing this out of sheer spite for the gryffindor's actions.*

Hufflepuffs: *giggles while jumping onto a trash an (if hogwarts has those)* you can't get me *slips and falls onto the floor* IT BURRRRNNNNSSSSSS.. HISSSS… *gets mistaken for a parselmouth, or a lavamouth in this case. not.*

This has been yet another brief description of the Hogwarts houses.

Totally canon headcanon. According to ttublr user fuckrealityihaveablog :What if Charlie Weasley is asexual? Like what is when his brothers were going through puberty and getting crushes on girls and just obsessing over them, Charlie was like, "'Guys, DRAGONS."

Tumblr user little-bit-fancy : Today I came across a wifi connection called Hogwarts. I decided I would hack my first wifi. I put in alohomora. It worked.

Two best Harry PotterSassTM lines. number 1:

[[Snape] "Do you remember me telling you were are practicing nonverbal spells, Potter?"

"Yes," said Harry stiffly."

"Yes, sir"]

"There's no need to call me sir, Professor."

Number 2:

[[Vernon Dursley] "Listening to the news? Again?"]

"Well, it changes every day, you see."

Hermione: Please say words of encouragement so I don't murder Malfoy right now.

Harry: There are no books in Azkaban.

Hermione: *nods* Thank you.

I don't have a source for this, sorry. But according to tumblr user 1:

"The microwave is like the resurrection stone cause it brings your food back to life but it's never the same as it was before."

They just did.

ANd the best one yet:

Tumblr user queer-remus Sirius Black making no less than 37 deer-related jokes in his best man speech.

Tumblr user glorious-stardust : deerly beloved, family, and friends, it behooves me to deliver this speech to two of the purest harts I know, two individuals so fawned over each other that it completely bucks the notion of superficial love.

Doe they surely go through many trials and tribulations,

In the years ahead - many high and low points; stag-nant periods, where their love seems fallow - I know, as someone who knows them best, that they will not allow themselves to fall into a nut.

When it's all over, and people are sitting around telling tails of these two, they'll be telling each other of the purest love story anyone has ever herd.