"We often need to lose sight of our priorities in order to see them."
― John Irving

Shay and Kim abandoned the soccer game toward the middle when they realized that wolves could play faster, better, and dirtier than them. It didn't help that Jacob was sending Shay imploring looks the whole time, or that Kim had tried and failed on five different occasions to catch her eye with meaning.

If Shay had known the consequences of her actions would catch up to her so quickly, maybe she wouldn't have kissed him.

But she did. And she liked it. And she had a feeling she would do it again.

Stupid heart.

Stupid brain.

Kim knew there was no hiding their conversations when they were just a few feet from everyone, so she settled for watching Shay out of the corner of her eye.

The sun sunk lower and lower and the air turned chilly as they watched Quil dive to kick the ball from Jake, who spun to keep himself from falling. He caught Shay's eye as he jerked forward and smiled lopsidedly at her.

Shay could feel the side of her face burning and turned to Kim.

"We will talk later," Shay whispered, giving her a wide-eyed plea to keep quiet for now.

"Yes we will," Kim agreed, smiling and bumping Shay's leg.

Shay rolled her eyes and watched Jared's team score another goal, Quil leaping on Embry's shoulders as they celebrated, their feet almost wiping out the lines they'd dug in the sand to mark the boundaries.

"Can we eat now?" Jared whined, after high-fiving Quil. "I'm starving."

"Hey, you just want to eat because you're winning!" Seth called, his hands swinging at his sides. "Not fair!"

"It's getting dark anyway," Jared argued. "I have to get Kim home soon."

"We'll beat them next time," Leah said, hitting Seth on the shoulder. Shay noticed the tension had finally drained from her shoulders, and she looked more relaxed among the pack than she had in a while. "Right?"

Seth nodded, his face morphing back to a usual grin as everyone wandered toward Kim and Shay.

Shay's insides froze a little. Now would be the time for a quick getaway, where she didn't have to make eye contact with Jacob, and she could just—

"Shay, can we talk?" Jake's voice met her ears, "We can walk a little," He added, shuffling his feet as she turned to face him.

"Um, sure," Shay said, trying to sound more breezy than she currently felt. She rose to her feet and toed back on the flip flops she'd kicked off before the game.

Shooting a panicked look at Kim, who gave her a thumbs up in a very non-discreet manner, Shay followed Jacob as he walked in the opposite direction of the guys and Leah's car.

They walked for a few moments in silence, just the sounds of the water lapping next to them.

Shay wasn't sure if it was awkward or not. Okay, it was definitely awkward, because she had launched herself at him not one hour ago, and god, was she so—

Breaking her inner panic, Shay felt a warm hand slide into her own, their fingers interlacing before her brain had the good sense to pull away.

She turned to Jacob with a suspicious look and he just smiled his infuriating smile at her.

"What?" he asked casually, swinging their arms. "Friends hold hands sometimes."

"Oh yeah?" Shay laughed, hoping it didn't sound hysterical. "When's the last time you held hands with Quil?"

"Yesterday." Jake paused for a second. "When's the last time you kissed Kim on the lips?"

Shay thought her heart might stop in her chest.

"Last week," Shay answered quickly, before her blush gave her away. "I didn't—I'm sorry I did that—"

"You never have to apologize for kissing me," Jake said, his fingers slightly squeezing hers as she thought she might very well burst into flame. "But please don't ask me to forget it again."

Shay felt hot and cold all at once and defensiveness clawed at her throat as she looked toward the ocean, where the moon was starting to rise over the waves.

"Well you confuse me, Jacob—"

"I confuse you?" She felt his hand drop from hers as his voice rose. He stopped walking now, facing her with a wild look sparking in his eyes.

"Yes!" She threw her hands in the air. "You act like you hate me for weeks, then suddenly it's Mr. Nice Guy with the sneaky compliments and overall gorgeousness who kisses me in the kitchen and then runs off to hang out with his soon to be married ex-girlfriend or whatever the hell she was—"

"I did not run off with her!"

"Ok. Well Seth told me he can't go to the prom because that's the day of her wedding. Tell me, what are you doing that day?" Shay couldn't keep the bitterness from her tone and watched as Jake's angry gaze turned to a frown.

His silence was answer enough to make her shoulders slump back down and she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Well you're the one who kissed me back, then told me it was a mistake, then kissed Simon Hote, then broke up with him, then kissed me again. You think that's not confusing?" Jake shot back, running a hand through his hair.

"Of course it's confusing!" Shay exclaimed. "I'm confused!"

With the sun gone, the ocean looked like dark glass, the sand a ghostly gray as Jacob sunk down on the sand next to her before he tugged her arm to sit down.

His face was all angles and smooth skin in this light and Shay hoped the darkness hid the red that likely invaded every inch of her face.

She pulled her knees to her chest, keeping her body as close together as possible as she heard Jacob audibly sigh next to her.

"Why do you just want to be friends?" Jacob finally asked, his eyes cutting across to her. "I'm fine if that's what you want. I'd respect it. But is that what you really want?"

Most of their conversations danced around the subject, so to be so direct was jarring. She was having trouble remembering to be coherent as his gaze stayed on her.

"I don't know," Shay waved her hand in the air, hoping that meant something. "I'm not interested in being with someone who still loves someone else."

Shay was trying to be careful and not reveal how much she actually liked him. But she knew she had as good as told him today. She swallowed and watched Jacob's face pinch together, before he shook his head.

"I'm not."

"Not in love with her?"

He nodded, analyzing her expression.

"Since when?" Her voice was embarrassingly soft.

"I thought recently," Jake admitted, bowing his head. "But I think actually longer than that."

This revelation sent Shay's mind whirling but she was still too afraid to be totally relieved. Still, her chest felt lighter, and her spine relaxed a little before she voiced the rest of her fears.

"So I'm a rebound choice?"

"No." He was vehement. "You're my first choice."

"Jake—"

"I know you think I need more time. But it's really, really hard to be around you and not be with you."

He was looking at her again, with that look that made her forget her doubts and turned her bones into liquid.

"You just said you'd respect if I wanted to friends," she pointed out, trying to look away from him.

"I would, if that's what you wanted. But I think you could want more. And I'd much rather go out with you." He was suddenly twisting to his side to face her, his fingers touching hers in the sand. "At night, I don't think of Bella. I think of you – so much that sometimes I can't fall asleep. We kissed eight days ago, and I've wanted to kiss you again every minute since. And not like you did today. Like really kiss you."

Shay's resolve crumpled to nothing as Jake leveled her with a look that she was sure would make her knees wobble if she was standing up. She closed the gap between them in a second.

Jake didn't even let out a noise of surprise as her lips found his, and he met her with ferocity.

He was still twisted to the side, trying to angle her face better when she had an idea. In a moment, she was straddling his lap, his hands on her waist and hers wrapped around his neck. His body was a welcome warmth after sitting on the cold sand, his mouth leaving fire trails everywhere he touched.

This might be a very bad idea but hell if she didn't remember why when he bit down lightly on her bottom lip and she moaned, causing him to stiffen slightly before his tongue met hers, his hands sliding up her back.

Shay usually had apprehension about most situations, but kissing him made her mind completely clear and her body turned to liquid heat.

Detaching from her lips, Jake suddenly flipped their position. Careful of not crushing her, he hovered above her body, hands in the sand on either side of her head.

She didn't even catch the expression on his face before he was rubbing his nose up the side of her neck, right to her wildly beating pulse. His mouth followed in the opposite direction, kissing downward until he reached her collarbone.

She had never known a feeling like this.

Not friends. Not friends. Her heart pounded.

Clutching at his body, she pulled him back to her for more, unable to stand another second of their mouths not touching.

She could feel his smirk fade as she kissed him again, this time her tongue tracing his bottom lip as he opened his mouth and lowered himself to his elbows.

She let herself lose every thought in her head as they kept kissing. Her hands fell down his back, her fingers clutching loosely at the hem of his shirt before diving inside, finding the warm skin of his back.

He breathed in sharply, using the moment to find her neck again, not kissing now but just holding his head there as they both struggled for breath.

"There's...something else I wanted to tell you."

She felt a deep satisfaction that his breathing was labored, and his voice sounded deep and raspy.

"Mermaids are real, too?" she asked dumbly, unsure if she wanted to talk or keep kissing him until she ran out of breath forever.

"No."

He chuckled and then moved like it pained him, sliding away from her and grabbing her hand to pull her back to a sitting position. She probably had half a beach worth of sand in her hair but she didn't care as he sat in front of her, knees touching her own.

"There's this thing that can happen to the pack." His face was serious again, his eyes tracing across every inch of her skin. "It's called...imprinting."

Shay had to pretend she didn't know what he meant because she didn't want Kim to get in trouble. So she tilted her head to the side and bit her lip. She'd sort of forgotten about that weird phenomenon, but to be fair, she almost forgot her own name when he kissed her.

"What?" she finally settled on asking, her voice low.

"It's when one of us instantly bonds to someone. They sort of become...the most important person to them. It can be any type of relationship, but usually the feelings are so strong that it's," he shrugged. "romantic."

Shay felt a sweat start on her forehead even though the night was cold. Why was he telling her this now? Why did he look so intensely focused on her? Why why why.

"So if we go out, you're warning me you could imprint?" she finally asked. The thought of him suddenly feeling love for someone else if they were in a relationship made her body feel tingly with dread.

"No." Jake suddenly gave her a confusingly large grin that was very much at odds with her rising nerves. "That won't happen."

"Why not?" Her brow furrowed. "You can't imprint?"

"No," Jake looked at her now, so intense she could feel it from her heart to her toes. He gave her a meaningful look, tilting his head forward in her direction. "I already have."

"What?" she asked, her voice somewhat breathless.

Kim said he hadn't imprinted on Bella. Was she lying? No-Kim wouldn't lie about that. But Kim had given her a strange look, a look she'd written off as awkwardness but now she was wondering if it was something more...

Jacob stared at her and she stared back stupidly. Her body had ceased to function. There was only air between her ears.

"On who?"

His eyes darkened, the moonlight making them almost black.

"On you."

Shay's brain caught up very slowly. She was pretty sure she gaped at Jacob for a full minute as her thoughts passed by in a tangled blur. The only thing she was acutely aware of was her heartbeat banging a rhythm in her chest.

"Me? When?"

"The night I came back to town."

He watched her again but she didn't even notice now. Her memory whirled back to that day, in Emily's house, when Jacob had appeared. She'd stumbled over to him and rambled like a loser, and he had stared at her before glaring, before running out—

Her stomach felt like a weight, pushing her body into the ground.

"But you can't—I mean, you didn't—"

Like me – her inner voice echoed. You didn't even like me then.

The situation suddenly ceased being confusing and landed with a thump between them with a clarity that made her legs weak.

"That's why you hated me," she whispered, puzzle pieces falling together. "Because you didn't want me."

"No!" Jake tried to reach for her hand but she pulled it away, inching backward in the sand to put some distance between her body and his stupid, warm one. "It was a shock, yes—"

"Because you didn't want to imprint on me," Shay shook her head, pressing her fingertips into her temple to stem some of the rising pain. "I'm so stupid. You don't like me, you just feel like you have to."

"No I don't! Imprinting isn't like that—"

"Yes it is! You loved someone else and now you're settling for me because some weird supernatural force is what? Telling you you should!"

"I am not settling for you. I want you." Jacob's voice was a growl at this point and he reached out to grab her hands before she pulled back like he stung her.

"I don't think you do," Shay said, her chin getting dangerously close to a wobble. But no, she would not cry, not in front of him, not now. "It all makes sense now."

"Please stop that train of thought, that is not what is going on!" Jake looked ready to pounce on her or jump into the ocean, but she couldn't place why.

"Oh yeah? So in the normal world, you would be asking me out right now?"

He paused for a second, biting his lip.

"Maybe not this second, but eventually."

Shay felt shame fall about her in waves. She was just kissing him, losing her mind to it, and he was probably just being pulled along by a bond that he didn't even want.

"Well un-do it then!" she said, rising to her feet.

He watched her for a second, eyes wide before slowly standing in front of her.

"You can't un-do it," he said, voice full of a low rage she hadn't heard from him...ever. "Is that really what you want?"

Was it? No. But she couldn't handle being a second choice, either.

"I want you to leave me alone," she bit out, turning on her heel and practically running away.

And when she was far enough that she was sure he could no longer hear, she let herself start to cry.

Womp, womp. Let me know your thoughts.