I don't own Stardew Valley, just my OCs and plot.
The following morning Sebastian joined his family crammed into his mother's truck with her display for the fair in the back. The fair was not an event Sebastian enjoyed, partially because it attracted people from out of town, and he was not into the crowds. He usually hung out off to the side, and Sam would join him when he was done playing games. Sebastian also hated being crammed into the truck with his whole family, but it was easiest for Robin to set up if everyone helped. Many of the townsfolk were already there, having to set up their own stands. They had just finished getting everything out of the truck when Sebastian spied Mariah with a wheelbarrow at her empty display. As she unloaded, Mariah was chatting with Marnie, whose display was already set up.
Once Sebastian was done helping his mother, he'd intended to go over to see Mariah. He looked over and her display was set up, but his girlfriend was nowhere near it. He scanned the area, but didn't see her. Knowing her, she was making the rounds to make sure to talk to the whole town. He sighed, supposing he would just go to his usual spot, away from the displays, games, but most importantly crowds. She's catch up with him eventually. Sebastian had an urge for a cigarette, but he knew that was out of habit rather than actual need. It was early still, so there weren't too many people here yet, better off saving the smoke break for when the crowds rolled in and he would feel like he was suffocating. He sat down on the grass, and closed his eyes. He caught the smell of coffee wafting around him. Why hadn't he thought to bring some? It was far too early and some more coffee would be divine. Gus only ever had burgers available, which would be fine later in the day, but most definitely not now.
"Hey," he heard Mariah's soft voice.
Sebastian opened his eyes, and watched as she sat down next to him, "Hey."
She stretched her legs out in front of her, crossing them. And then Sebastian noticed the thermos. Of course she was the one to bring coffee. He stared as she took a sip.
She saw him looking, and laughed, "You want some Bash?"
"Uh, yes please," he said a bit sheepishly, "Little early for me. One cup isn't cutting it."
She took another sip before passing the thermos to him, "Crazy morning for me. Skipped breakfast to get my farm work done. Really glad I prepped the stuff for my grange display last night. You brought your rabbits foot for me?"
"Err no," he admitted, "I forgot. But don't worry, I'm sure you'll do great."
"Sebastian have you even looked at my display?"
"Well, no, not up close, only from back this way. But I know you work hard, so it's got to be good," he sounded guilty, "Please keep sharing your coffee with me."
Mariah laughed, "It's not a big deal, don't worry about it. I just hope someone beats Pierre. I was warned about what a prick he is about it, but I was an idiot and assumed people were exaggerating. They were not."
"Not like he's some great guy the rest of the time," Sebastian said.
"You know, that is an excellent point. I should have thought about that and realized when I was warned how true it would be. Not that it would have changed what I put in my display," She took a bag of blackberries out of her pocket and popped one into her mouth, holding the bag out to him.
Sebastian shook his head, "No thanks."
Mariah ate the berries in between sips from the thermos that was getting passed between them, "So have you thought about what you're going to do with that pumpkin? I mean after you make your video. Which you definitely need to send me a link to when you've uploaded it."
"What does one really do with a pumpkin after they've fucked it?" Sebastian asked with a snort, "Or any produce I suppose. Eating it is off the table. But I won't be sending you the video, since you can just take care of that yourself as my director/videographer and all."
"Hmmm," Mariah thought, "I suppose that depends on how wrecked it is. Maybe you should look it up."
"Oh you're hilarious. That's just what I want in my search history. 'Pumpkin fucking' followed by 'What to do with a pumpkin after fucking it?' Riah I'm concerned for your mental health. I think you need a support group or rehab or something."
Mariah laughed again, "Only if you come with me."
"Never," Sebastian shook his head with a smile, "I haven't decided what to do with it yet. I thought about saving it to carve it or something, but I might give it to the junimos. It's just tricky because it's so hideous that it's beautiful and I'm not sure I can bear to part with it yet."
"It was my favorite," Mariah nodded, "I get it. It's a tough choice."
"Thank you by the way," Sebastian said, looking intently at her.
"It's just a pumpkin Bash," Mariah said, "But you're welcome."
"Not for that. I mean, yes, thanks for that too, it was a nice surprise, especially the soup. What I meant was thank you for not being judgmental or prying or anything about the therapy stuff. I was ashamed about it for a long time. It's still something I keep pretty close to my chest because I have gotten comments. And then there's like Sam, who is supportive, but then asks me a bunch of questions after my appointment, like I can't get any privacy. I don't think he realizes how intrusive it is."
"Of course," Mariah said, squeezing his hand, "Therapy is important shit."
"I sort of wish I'd valued it more when I was younger. Maybe I'd be better than I am now. I mean I did it, but it was always sort of a 'uggg let's get this over with' kind of thing and I didn't get as much from it as I could have," Sebastian said with a sigh, "Not that it's my favorite thing now, but it's just easier."
"You weren't ready," she shrugged, "Trust me I've been there. With the right therapist it can make a difference no matter what, but much less so when you're not ready. When I wanted the help things progressed so much more quickly."
"I think I also thought that I was doing better than I really was," Sebastian said, "Because I wasn't doing as terribly as I had been."
"That makes sense," Mariah said, "Like I told you yesterday, I know I'm not at 100%. I'm probably at like 80-90% most of the time, and that's good with me. But if you went from like 20% to 50% that's a pretty big difference so it makes sense that you'd feel like you were doing great when you could still be doing better. Not that I know where you were vs. where you are, that's just an example."
"Yeah, I get it," he nodded, "I'm also realizing that my doing really great is not going to make me look like everybody else, and that's okay."
"You being happy with where you are is what's important," Mariah agreed, "And no offense to everybody else, but I'd totally dump you if you were just like them."
Sebastian blushed and mumbled, "Thanks."
"So the weather's looking good for Thursday," Mariah's eyes twinkled, "When am I getting a ride?"
"That depends, what time are you normally done with your farm stuff?"
"That varies day to day. Unless it's the first day of the season, usually before noon. Sometimes as early as 10, unless it's rainy then even earlier. Which it's not supposed to be, so that's sort of irrelevant. Yoba I need to make some sprinklers."
"And do you have other non-farm stuff you have to do?"
She shook her head, "I have tons of stuff I could do, but nothing that needs to get done that day."
"Okay, so then follow up question, do you want to eat lunch before we leave or when we get there?"
"Oh, um, I don't know. Either is fine with me," Mariah thought out loud.
"Then how about like 11/ 11:30? Would that work?" Sebastian asked, "We've got some flexibility."
"And I don't have to dress up right?" she asked.
"Right," he nodded.
"Anything in particular I should or shouldn't wear?"
"I mean I'd advise against wearing like dress or skirt just because of the bike ride. I've never worn one before so I can't confirm, but I feel like that would be uncomfortable. But other than that it doesn't matter," Sebastian explained.
"Got it," Mariah nodded, "And this isn't some ploy to get me away from the rest of the people in this tiny town to murder me and dump my body somewhere right?"
"If it were, do you think I would admit to it?" Sebastian smirked, "Besides, now that you're the one who brought it up, how do I know that's not your plan for me?"
"You're the one who invited me out," Mariah said, "Besides I don't even know where we're going so I can't even begin to plan something like that."
"Oh so I should make sure all future dates are surprises planned by me so I don't get murdered. Got it," Sebastian nodded, "I'm onto you."
"Darn, I did say too much didn't I?" Mariah let out an exaggerated sigh, "Guess I'll have to try to be more discrete next time."
"Or maybe what we've learned is that we need to join forces. We can think through plots better that way," Sebastian suggested.
"You are just living up to that 'It's always the quiet ones' stereotype now aren't you?" Mariah shook her head, "But you are quite diabolical. Trying to get me focused onto a different victim to ensure your safety. Smart thinking Bash."
"Not anywhere near as diabolical as you are. Being so sweet, giving everyone gifts, revitalizing the community, even if they don't know it yet, lulling everyone into a false sense of security. The whole town would defend anyone who would try to suggest that you did anything even remotely mean. 'No that couldn't have been Mariah, you must be mistaken. She's so sweet and kind and thoughtful.' Pure evil," Sebastian said, poking her side.
"I appreciate that me asking a question about my safety has turned into fleshing out my life as a serial killer. What have you gotten yourself into?" She smiled at Sebastian, and he was positive that if they'd been alone she would have kissed him in that moment.
"Pretty sure I've gotten myself in the safe zone now that I've covered all my bases with my detective skills," he teased, "Beyond that, I'm thinking it's something pretty good."
"You are the sneaky bad cop," she laughed.
"Hey guys!" Sam said, coming over to them.
"Hey Sam!" Mariah responded with his same level of enthusiasm.
"What are you talking about?" Sam asked.
"Who's more diabolical," Mariah answered.
"Hmmm tricky one. If it were someone else I'd say Seb, but you're definitely this like crazy planning skill and attention to detail that could lead to madness," Sam said, sitting down across from them.
"Sam, you're my witness. We're going out on Thursday, if I don't come back, it was her. She's going to ditch my body on the side of the road or something," Sebastian said.
"You are one terrible friend," Mariah shook her head at Sebastian, "Now after I ditch your body I'll have to come for Sam. I'm so sorry Sam, I had no idea he was going to drag you into this."
"Eh I've lived a good life," Sam shrugged, "Short but no regrets. I'd rather go out this way then end up joining a cult or something. Take good care of Vincent for me Mariah."
"Of course I will," she nodded solemnly.
"So where are you guys going Thursday?" Sam asked.
"It's a surprise," Sebastian said noncommittally.
Sam rolled his eyes, "Okay fine do whatever weird murder thing you're apparently into now and don't tell me."
"No Sam, it's literally a surprise. For me. He's not just being an asshole," Mariah explained.
"That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said about me," Sebastian said, "You're too sweet."
Mariah snorted and rolled her eyes.
"Oh okay," Sam said with an improved mood, before rounding on Sebastian, "You could have told me about it!"
"Sam, you're my best friend, but you're shit at keeping secrets. It's not intentional, you just let things slip. You'll have to wait until after our date to find out about it," Sebastian said.
"Can't you like text me or something right before you leave?" Sam asked.
"Alright, I'd say that this is like an unhealthy amount of interest in our relationship," Mariah began, "But I know if the tables were reversed I have some friends that I'd be having this same conversation with. So I'm going to give you this advice. Number one, just wait until we get back so then not only can you ask him what the date is, but you can also ask him how it went."
"Oh Yoba stop giving him ideas," Sebastian groaned.
"And number two," Mariah continued, ignoring Sebastian, "You guys need to play another show without your mom and Vincent, and half the town present, so you can hook up with a groupie or something. Then maybe you'll be less concerned with what we're doing."
Sebastian did smirk at that.
"Oh man, that is a good idea," Sam said with big eyes, "The waiting until after the date thing. Not that the other thing sounds awful either."
"What happened to privacy?" Sebastian grumbled at Mariah.
"Hey I only suggested that he ask, I didn't say you had to tell him anything," Mariah teased, "Besides you know he would have anyway. Now he's just bothering you once instead of twice."
"Hey have you guys played any of the games yet?" Sam asked.
"You know I haven't," Sebastian said, sounding slightly annoyed.
"Not yet," Mariah shook her head, "Set up my grange display, said hello to some people, and came over here."
"Wanna come with me?" Sam offered, "I want to see if I can beat my slingshot record from last year."
"You go, I'll catch up soon," Mariah declined. Sam nodded his head and went off in the direction of the sling shot game.
"You can go have fun," Sebastian said softly, "I'm fine here."
"I am having fun," Mariah said, "I'll go in a bit. I know you're fine being on your own. I'm not trying to keep you company because I feel guilty about leaving you alone. I just want some more time with you first."
"I promise someday you won't have to keep telling me that you like spending time with me," Sebastian sighed, "I do know it's true, I just don't think I'm used to it yet. The whole pushing people away all the time thing you know?"
"You did largely communicate through grunts when I first met you," Mariah teased.
Sebastian blushed, "Yes, I needed a reminder of that. Thanks."
"Bash, we got through that just fine didn't we?" She laughed, "But I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make your feel bad."
"Just makes me wonder why you bothered to keep trying, that's all," he said.
"Hmm," Mariah thought, "I guess I just saw something in you, even then. I didn't take your anxiety personally."
"Well thank fuck for that," Sebastian said, "Because if it were left on me, we'd probably be on one or two word interactions still. And I'd be pining away for you under all my self loathing."
"And now you talk more to me than you talk to the rest of the town combined."
Sebastian laughed, "I don't know how I feel about how painfully accurate that is."
"Don't worry, you're still plenty stoic. You haven't lost your edge," Mariah assured him, "I just value communication so much so you're subconsciously pressuring yourself into talking more to impress me."
"You know that wouldn't surprise me," he laughed again, "Glad my brain is doing something on it's own."
"I touched a brain once," Mariah said with nonchalance.
"What?" Sebastian said slowly looking at her with wide eyes.
"In my brief college stint, one of my girls in my math class was an anatomy major. We got super high together once and broke into one of the anatomy labs after hours so she could prove a point. Don't ask me what the point was now because I don't remember, but it had something to do with brains. We wore gloves, so at least we were smart enough to do that."
"What kind of brain was it?"
Mariah shrugged, "No clue. I'm not sure if I used to know and forgot or if I never knew."
"What'd it feel like?"
"It was less squishy and slimy than I was expecting it to be. It was pretty similar to poking raw meat."
"Hmm," Sebastian said.
"You're the only person I've ever told that story. We didn't get caught either. So you might be one of three people to know about that. No clue if she ever told anyone either. And now I don't even remember her name," Mariah mused, "Funny how stuff like that works."
"You have some interesting stories," Sebastian said, stroking her arm, "I love it when you share stuff like that."
Mariah blushed, "Thanks, I guess. I love you stories too. Like that one about the creamsicle."
"That was barely a story," Sebastian said.
"Oh it was definitely a story. Someday you'll tell me more stories without being high. I mean don't get me wrong, it makes it so much easier that way, I get it, but I just feel like you open up more when you are high," Mariah noted.
"That's true," Sebastian agreed, "I think of things when I'm high that I don't normally. Plus, I'm a lot more relaxed."
"You weren't high when you told me about how you got your motorcycle," Mariah pointed out.
"Yeah that's true. Not that is such a happy story. I've got much more entertaining stories than that," Sebastian said.
"Oh good. You can think of which one you're going to tell me when you come over later," Mariah said with a grin.
"Oh I'm coming over later?" he raised an eyebrow
"I'm real smooth right?" Mariah smiled.
"So smooth," Sebastian snorted, "Way easier than just asking me to come or telling me you wanted to hang out."
"You don't have to if you don't want to, you know that," Mariah said.
"Right now I do, but I'll let you know. Might need a break after this," he said in earnest.
"That's totally fair," Mariah said.
"Welcome, welcome!" Lewis' voice came over a loudspeaker, Mariah and Sebastian turning their heads at the sound, "Thank you all for coming to the Stardew Valley Fair! We are so glad to have you join us in our hamlet. I hope that everyone is enjoying themselves this fine day. I am happy to announce the winners of the grange display competition. In fourth place, Willy Evanston," there was some light applause, "In third place, Marnie Gifford," more applause, "In second place, Mariah Washington," and instead of applause there were groans, "And in first place for the sixth consecutive year, Pierre Sullivan," there were unenthusiastic claps, "If you have not yet seen the beautiful displays for our own Pelican Town artisans, I strongly encourage for you to do so before leaving! Our winners can see me to receive their prizes."
"Sorry," Sebastian said.
"Eh, I don't really care about winning, I'm just sad that Pierre won again. Smug asshole. No offense to Abby," Mariah said, "Although second place isn't bad for my first display."
"I should probably look at it at some point huh?" Sebastian said.
"Pfft, who wants to look at my second rate shit," Mariah laughed.
"I dunno I just feel like that's like the boyfriend thing to do," Sebastian shrugged, "I really probably should have done it earlier before the judging happened."
"But if you look at it now, you can get all indignant and tell me I should have won, and that I was robbed," Mariah teased, "Bash I really don't care. Don't get all tied up on what 'boyfriend things' are or aren't."
"I do want to look at it though. I'm curious what else you put in there besides pumpkins," Sebastian said.
"Well," Mariah said standing up and brushing off her pants, "I guess I'm going to go talk to Lewis and then find Sam. So feel free whenever you want to check it out, but no pressure from me."
Sebastian reached up and squeezed her hand.
"Darling you were robbed. Your display was simply dashing," Elliot said, sweeping in from nowhere, and then glancing at their hand holding, "Oh, I'm sorry, am I interrupting?"
Mariah laughed, dropping Sebastian's hand to cover her mouth. Sebastian smirked.
"Am I missing something?" Elliot asked looking between them.
"Thank you Elliot, I truly appreciate it," Mariah said once she had stopped laughing, "I don't mean to laugh, but if I didn't know any better, I'd swear you had been ease dropping. I had just suggested that Sebastian get indignant on my behalf and say that I was robbed."
"Boyfriend duties," Sebastian added in a low tone.
"Oh I did not realize you were paramours, how marvelous!" Elliot said, "My sincerest felicitations for your relationship. Ah to be young and in love. I hope you both are finding joy in your pairing."
"Thank you," Mariah said, looking over at Sebastian, "I guess we've avoided the gossip mill fairly well then."
"Guess so," Sebastian agreed, standing up himself, "And thank you Elliot." Although it's fucking weird that you call my girlfriend darling. Sebastian also had a thought of frustration that it wasn't common knowledge that they were together. He didn't like being talked about, but he also wanted everyone to know that Mariah wasn't available. Am I feeling jealous? He groaned internally at the realization, decidedly against going down that rabbit hole. Talk about anxiety spikes. He trusted Mariah, but the idea of other people trying to attract her attention made him a bit sick to his stomach. No, no, no, no, no. Just focus on the trust you have in her. She chose you, she wants to spend time with you. When it comes to your relationship no one else matters besides the two of you.
Sebastian realized he'd been so internally preoccupied that he hadn't noticed Elliot and Mariah having a conversation. They were just saying goodbye when he tuned back in.
"Good to see you as well Sebastian," Elliot said, giving him a nod.
"Uh, thanks. You too," he responded awkwardly before Elliot walked away.
"You good?" Mariah asked, looking at him and taking his hand again, "Looked like you were zoning pretty hard there for a second."
"Yeah, I'm alright. Think I'm just going to have a smoke before I do anything else," he said.
"Okay," she squeezed his hand, "I'll be around."
"Have fun," he said, squeezing back before their hands dropped apart again.
Mariah walked off and he got out his pack of cigarettes, taking a long, slow drag as he lit up. The familiar warmth of the smoke was calming. As he relaxed, he looked around, making a plan for himself. After he finished his cigarette he made his way over to the grange displays, after ensuring there weren't too many people around. Mariah's display had six of the best looking pumpkins he'd ever seen in rows of three. One at the top of the box and one at the bottom. She had two chunks of cheese capping the ends of the middle row. Sebastian assumed that it was likely good quality cheese, but he had no idea what he was looking at in terms of cheese. Displayed in the center of the box was a shining diamond. It looked like a great display to him. Of course none of the displays looked particularly bad, though Willy's fish were rather smelly. Knowing how poorly Mayor Lewis tolerated the smell of fish, it was no wonder that Willy's display never won. Sebastian wondered if the fact that Marnie was sleeping with him was preventing her from winning as well. Lewis seemed determined enough, for whatever bizarre reason, to hide their relationship, so he wouldn't want to favor her display over the others so that people wouldn't talk. Pathetic. Or so Sebastian assumed.
Sebastian took a look around, and noticed Abby waving at him. She was standing off to the side, against the Saloon opposite of where he had been earlier. He wandered over to her to say hello.
"Look at you Sebby, actually participating in the fair instead of hiding and chain smoking," Abby teased with a smile.
"Don't get too used to it. I was just looking at Mariah's display and I'm about to go get food before being antisocial again," Sebastian said.
"Was she upset she didn't win?" Abby asked.
"No, I don't think she cares too much. She was more upset that no one beat your dad," he said, "She called him a smug asshole, with an added 'no offense to Abby'"
"Ah, well she's not wrong. He's insufferable, both leading up to today and most likely for the rest of the week, gloating about how he won. Although it might be worse if he didn't win," Abby shrugged.
"Maybe," Sebastian agreed. He eyed the crowd cautiously, more people were milling around the square, "I think I'm going to go."
Abby looked around too, "See you Sebastian."
He made his way up the steps to the clearing in front of the playground where the food was. There were very few people up here, but just the same Sebastian planned on getting his burger and going back to his isolated spot. None of the tourists ever ventured over there and rarely did he see townspeople there, well except for Sam. When he finished his burger, he tossed his empty plate into the trash can by the Saloon. He sat back down where he had been before, trying to rack his brain for a good story to tell Mariah.
Yoba why did I have to say I have so many entertaining stories. I don't do anything so how can I have entertaining stories? He could tell her the story about Abigail trying to keep a stray cat as a pet without her parents finding out. But that was really more of an Abigail story than a story about him. Why is this so hard? Why can't I think of anything? Mariah told stories so easily. Somehow they just came up in conversation, and it probably didn't hurt that she grew up in the city and did things. Sebastian sighed, and stopped that train of thought, knowing that it was only going to more anxiety. He was itching to leave, realizing how the stress of the day was weighing on him more than he would like.
"See, I told you he'd be over here," he heard Sam say from behind him.
Sebastian glanced behind him and saw Sam, Abby, and Mariah coming up. Sam was carrying a rarecrow dressed in a tatter suit.
"All I said is that the last I saw him he was going to get some food," Abby said.
"Seb, Mariah is a con artist!" Sam said sounding excited.
"I got lucky," Mariah said with insistence.
"You did something, I swear," Sam disagreed, "I don't know what but something."
"Or maybe it's a really dumb and easy game," Mariah rolled her eyes, "Penny told me she won ten times in a row and the guy wouldn't let her play any more. I sucked at the rest of the games. It was luck."
"You beat the smashing stone," Sam pointed out, "Which I guess no one is surprised by. And you beat me at the fishing game."
"Yeah I bet Vincent would beat you at the fishing game," Mariah said, "You suck at fishing."
"She's not wrong," Abby said, "You do suck at fishing."
"Anyway!" Sam said, "Mariah started out with 500 star tokens from coming in second for the grange display and ended up with over 3,000 in like 10 minutes."
"She also won't tell me what the fortune teller said," grumbled Abby.
"You are such a liar," Mariah said, "I told you what she said. It was really boring. And weirdly wrong. Unless Sam really did think that everyone forgot his birthday."
"Maybe that's next year's birthday," Abby said, "She's a fortune teller, not a past teller. And she must have said something more than the field thing."
"I'm telling you it was boring. She told me that Sam thought everyone forgot his birthday until I gave him a present, and it made him happy. She told me I was standing in a field with Sebastian and I looked happy. And she told me something dark was coming at me, but I was ready to handle it."
"Considering I knew about the planned birthday party, never crossed my mind that everyone would have forgotten about it," Sam said, "It sounds like a crock of shit to me."
"Definitely not worth the 100g I paid for it," Mariah agreed, "Especially since she gave me the 'Oh but the future isn't set in stone' blah blah blah spiel afterwards."
"She didn't even mention Carver to me," Abby said.
"Yeah because he doesn't live here," Sebastian said, "I'm positive she just gets fed names of townspeople and who is friends with who to make the predictions with."
"But what if she doesn't?" Abby said.
"Then I have a very boring future. And apparently people are going to forget Sam's birthday next year," Mariah said.
"Bummer," Sam frowned, but quickly shook out of it, "Anyway, the point is Sebastian you need to come with us. Mariah has enough to get a stardrop and the shop lady won't let her take it without eating it in front of her."
"And why do I need to go with you for that?" Sebastian asked.
"Apparently it's going to make me trip for a minute and you need to watch," Mariah shrugged, "And then I'm getting out of here. If Sam gives me my damn rarecrow back. Seeing as I actually have a use for it and he doesn't."
"They are pretty trippy," Sebastian nodded, standing up and brushing off his pants.
"Okay until today I assumed that stardrops were just myths and apparently they make you hallucinate? What happens in this damn town? And why will no one tell me what it tastes like?"
"Because we can't," Sebastian said, "They taste different to everyone who eats them. And don't worry about the hallucinating it's just like purple and really only lasts for a minute."
"Well that's way better then 'Oh it's just really hard to explain' from these idiots," Mariah said gesturing to Abby and Sam.
"Hey!" they both said.
"Can we go already?" Sebastian asked, "The sooner I can leave this stupid fair the better."
"Okay princess," Abby said, "Let's go."
No one else was at the booth when Mariah turned in her star tokens to get her fruit.
"Well here goes," she said popping the fruit into her mouth. Her eyes widened and her whole body tensed up, arms sticking out in front of her. It was very brief and then she relaxed, "Was I just shaking? It felt like I was shaking?"
They shook their heads.
"Hmmm, oh well. Definitely purple. And a really short trip," Mariah said.
"What did it taste like?" Abby asked smugly.
"Coffee and new book smell, with like a hint of freedom? And it was somehow also fruity? But don't ask me what freedom tastes like. It was strange, but I liked it. I also feel really good right now, maybe I'm still high," Mariah mused.
"Damn it you weren't supposed to be able to describe it!" Abby said, frazzled, "I mean I guess I'm glad you can't describe what freedom tastes like."
"Okay Sam, give me the rarecrow, and I'll give you my extra tokens and you can try and get your own if you want it so bad," Mariah said.
"Ugg, fine," Sam handed it over. Mariah took her remaining star tokens out of her pocket and passed them to him.
"Okay, I'm going to go pack up my grange display," Mariah said.
"Abs you want to come with me and see if I can get the rest of the tokens I need?" Sam asked.
"Sure," Abby shrugged, "Although I still don't understand why you want that rarecrow so badly."
Sebastian followed Mariah over to her display, and helped her maneuver the wheelbarrow out from behind it.
"Thanks," she said as she started to load it, starting with the rarecrow, "You can head home if you want, I can manage."
"But how could I pass up that smooth request to come over to your place?" Sebastian asked, though he internally started to question whether or not she still even wanted him to come.
"You still want to come?" she asked, mood perking up, "You seemed a little stressed so I just assumed you'd want some space."
"I don't mind being alone together for a while," Sebastian said, "Besides I need to grab volume three. Although I don't have either of the first two for you. Didn't think that through."
"Oh I see, you're just using me for my graphic novels," Mariah teased, "But don't worry about it, I don't need them any time soon."
Sebastian helped her load the pumpkins into the wheelbarrow. Mariah tucked the cheese and diamond safely between the stems of the pumpkins.
Once they got out of the town square, Mariah breathed a sigh of relief, which reflected how Sebastian felt on the inside.
"Not a fan of the fair?" Sebastian asked.
"It was fine," Mariah shrugged, "Just want to be home is all. Today was just kind of a whirlwind, and I'm ready to relax."
"Oh I am familiar with that feeling well," Sebastian said.
"Which is why I was pleasantly surprised that you still wanted to come over," Mariah said.
"It's all about Arctic Rush," Sebastian teased, "And you know spending time with you without Elliot interrupting. Does he always call you darling?"
"Frequently," Mariah said, "Slightly more eloquent and decidedly more Elliot than the amount of 'dude's in our conversations, but the same meaning is there. Were you jealous?"
Sebastian flushed, but decided to be honest, "A bit, yeah. That's why I was zoning out. Talking myself out of that degree of craziness."
"Well I assure you, you don't need to be jealous of Elliot, or anyone else for that matter," Mariah said.
"I know that logically," Sebastian said, "Just not great control over my abandonment issues and self doubt."
"Well if I can do anything to help, even if it's just listening, let me know," Mariah said, squeezing his hand after putting down the wheelbarrow in front a bin by her house.
"It's not you, you know? It's really all just me," Sebastian said, "I get in my own way too much. But thanks."
"Bash why don't you go relax and I'll be right in? Just gotta put this stuff away," Mariah suggested.
"I can help," he protested as she started unloading the wheelbarrow.
"I've got it, really," she said, as he started picking things out of the wheelbarrow to hand to her.
"You don't have to be so independent all of the time," he insisted, "Please let me help. I want to feel useful."
"Okay," she agreed, "Do you want pumpkin soup for dinner or have you had enough for now?"
"I could eat some more," Sebastian grinned.
"Oh so this is like Sam with pizza for you?" Mariah laughed.
"Pumpkin soup and sashimi," Sebastian closed his eyes and rubbed his stomach, "I could eat them anytime."
"Noted," Mariah giggled, "I've got a salmon I could make sashimi too."
"Oh Yoba that would be too much food," Sebastian shook his head.
"Okay," she agreed, "Just the pumpkin soup then."
After getting everything into the bin, Mariah brought the wheelbarrow into her shed. Shutting the door, she took hold of Sebastian's hand. She pressed a soft kiss to his knuckles, before starting the walk to the house hand in hand. Sebastian found himself elated by the affection, realizing how much he had really missed her touch over the last couple of days. Mariah dropped his hand, actually unlocking the door to her house.
Sebastian snorted, "Really Riah? You almost never lock your door."
"Hey there's not usually tourists around," Mariah said, "You never know."
Charlie came bounding over to them, tail wagging rapidly. Mariah and Sebastian each pet him, and he ran around in circles with excitement.
"I know buddy, you're not used to being stuck in the house for this long. You go ahead," she gestured to the open door and he ran off, disappearing between the rows of wheat.
Mariah pulled the door shut and refocused her attention onto Sebastian, who stood to the right of the entrance. She smiled at him, taking a step closer, clearly intending to go further into the living room. As she got close, Sebastian stopped her in her tracks by caressing her cheek. Mariah leaned into the movement, blushing slightly. He leaned in, kissing her gently. She kissed him back, closing the gap between them, pressing her body against his.
"I've wanted to kiss you all day," He muttered when they pulled away.
"Well you can kiss me all you want now," She said, looking up at him, lazily playing with his fringe between her fingers.
So he kissed her again, with greater force than the first kiss. She parted her lips wider, deepening the kiss, which Sebastian was more than willing to do. She gave him a nudge as they kissed, directing him towards the couch. He awkwardly stumbled backwards, not looking where he was going, allowing her to guide him so they didn't have to stop kissing, until he fell back onto the couch. He grabbed at her waist, pulling her down to him. She let out a throaty moan as he kissed her again, hungrily. Sebastian snaked his hands lower, cupping her ass, giving her a squeeze. She angled her hips, pressing into him while wrapping her arms around his neck. Sebastian could feel the heat of her arousal as she started kissing his jawline. He let out a pleasured hiss. One of Mariah's hand remained behind him, the other trailing down his clothed chest. He squeezed once again, not worrying about his own growing arousal as he allowed his hands to further wander her body. Mariah's mouth had made it's way to Sebastian's neck, nipping lightly at him. Sebastian slipped his hands underneath her shirt. His fingertips explored the smooth flesh.
"Bash," she said, pulling away, face flushed, "Is this, are you…are you good?" she studied his face.
He captured his mouth with hers once again in response, before pulling away himself, "Are you?"
"So good," she mumbled, "Too good."
"Can I?" he asked, his fingers tracing along the edges of her bra.
"Please," she breathed.
Sebastian ran his fingers over the fabric, finding her nipples easily teasing them, which elicited a moan, before massaging both breasts. Mariah began to grind against his erection. The extra stimulation, though it admittedly felt amazing, reminded Sebastian of the road they were headed down and how utterly unprepared for it he was.
"Maybe not as good as I thought," Sebastian said, withdrawing his hands from Mariah, who immediately stopped what she was doing. He felt his breathing pick up, and a too familiar tightness in his chest appeared. No, no, no, no. Yoba please not now.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Mariah said pulling away from him.
Sebastian looked down, closing his eyes, desperately trying to calm his breathing, but it was fast. Too fast, as his heart began to jackhammer instead of his chest.
"Bash?" Mariah was concerned, starting to realize what was going on.
Sebastian couldn't answer, clenching his hands into tight fists.
"Sebastian look at me," she said, a firm but calming voice. She grabbed hold of one of his hands, and tilted his head up to face her with her other hand, "Please look at me."
She took the fist she was holding, and forced her fingers in between his. He eventually relaxed his hand, which she placed sideways on her chest.
"Look at me, okay," She said again, softer, "Just focus on my face." She placed one of her hands on his chest in the same position she had placed his hand.
Sebastian forced his eyes open, knowing he was tearing up. No, no, no, no. Not like this. She can't see me like this.
"Just focus on my face," she repeated, "You feel my breathing? Just try to match your breaths to mine."
Sebastian heard her, but was struggling to keep himself focused. He wanted to curl up into a ball.
"Hey it's okay," she whispered, "It's going to be okay. This will pass okay?"
Sebastian took a ragged, but deep breath, trying to keep his focus on Mariah's face.
"You've got it," she encouraged, "Just breath and keep focusing on me."
He couldn't bring himself to make eye contact, instead focusing on the freckles spread across her cheeks. His breathing began to slow, but wasn't fully to where it should be. He was out of sync with Mariah's breathing, but getting close.
"You're doing great," she said again, "It's going to go away. I promise. You're going to be okay."
A tear snuck out the corner of his eye, he immediately wiped it away with his free hand. He was mad, so unbelievably mad at himself that Mariah was witnessing this moment of weakness. That it happened in the first place. That he was so unprepared for it.
Mariah kept murmuring praises and encouragements as he was able to gain more control over his breathing and behaviors. He closed his eyes again, focusing his attention on getting his breathing fully under control. His heart was still beating fast, but it was much more manageable. The gentle pressure of Mariah's hand on his chest was grounding him well. He leaned forward, resting his forehead against hers.
"Is it getting better?" she asked.
He nodded his head, but then the tears began to spill out. He removed his hand from her chest to wipe them away. Her hand slowly dropped from his chest, and he immediately began to ache for the touch back. She kissed his forehead gingerly, and embraced him.
"Is this okay?" she asked.
"Yeah," he croaked out. He hated everything about what had happened. He couldn't believe that he'd had a fucking panic attack like that, and that he was now crying on her.
"I'm sorry," he whimpered.
"Nothing to be sorry about," she said.
"No I fucked up," he insisted, glad that she was unable to see the increased tears now streaming down his face.
"No you didn't," she said, holding him tighter against him, "You didn't fuck up. You didn't do anything wrong."
"I had a fucking panic attack Mariah," he said with bitterness, "And now I'm crying like a fucking baby."
"So what?" she said, "It's not like we have control over panic attacks. They just kind of happen."
"But it shouldn't have," he said pulling away from her. He angled his body, sitting on her couch so that she could only see his side, "I was fine. Or at least I thought I was."
"And then I went too far," Mariah said, "Not your fault."
"Not your fault either," Sebastian sniffed, wiping away what he hoped were his last tears, "Yoba I fucking hate myself. I was really enjoying myself. Why? Why do I have to be like this? I hate that you saw this."
"Sebastian if the roles were reversed.." Mariah began.
"Yeah but they fucking weren't. You're just your amazing self and I'm this mess," Sebastian said.
"But if they were. And maybe someday they will be. You would feel the same way I do now. I know you're embarrassed, but none of this changes the way I feel about you."
"You deserve better." He was quiet, "You don't deserve this."
"Bash it will get better. It will get easier. I'm sure it will," Mariah said, "We're still just figuring stuff out. We just got so wrapped up in how good everything felt."
"And it should be that simple," He said, he paused for a moment, "Look I don't think there's anything you can say right now that's going to make me feel any better. I'm glad I haven't scared you away, but I'm still embarrassed, and this whole thing sucks. I don't want to have these moments. And they just catch me off guard like this, but I guess I should have known better."
"Sebastian I…" Mariah started again but Sebastian cut her off.
"Stop trying to fix it right now," He said, turning to look at her, "Just let me be miserable this time. Thank you for getting me through that, and thank you for trying, but it's too much. Feeling upset isn't going to kill me."
"Okay," she said in a small voice.
"I'm going to go have a cigarette," he said, standing up, "Actually, I think I might just go home."
"If that's what you want," Mariah nodded her head she stood up, following him to the door.
He looked at her, and she looked sad. Or was it disappointed? Maybe a bit of both. Sebastian absolutely loathed that he was the source of that emotion. He wrapped his arms around her, hugging her close. She buried her head in his chest, and hugged him tightly, until he pulled away. Better. I want to be better for you. But I'm just not there yet.