Warning: Harper experiences a panic attack in this chapter. Please don't read if it will trigger you.
I'll have that part in a different font, so you can skip it but read the rest of the chapter.
And for those who do read it, please don't hate if it's not 100 percent accurate. I've personally never experienced a panic attack but have been around someone who does. I did research and tried my best to make it as believable as possible.
I hope everyone likes the chapter!
I'd hoped I had been wrong when I thought living with the Davenports would be hard. But I seem to have a gift for knowing how things will turn out. Maybe it's a secret bionic ability I unlocked.
The Davenports had a different way of doing things that I wasn't accustomed to. Up until recently, I didn't have a curfew. Donald made sure to give me the same one his kids had. I've already broken it once on the second day and I got an earful from Donald because of it. I took it with a grain of salt because it's not like he could ground me or anything.
And, they do their homework right after they get home from school. I usually do it before bed or in the morning, or sometimes not at all.
Needless to say, there have been a few arguments between Donny and myself. And I don't think it's going to get better.
He asked me to come straight home after school today, but I got there about two hours late. He wasn't happy.
"Harper, I asked you to come home right after school ended. Where were you?" I plopped down on one of the stools before replying.
"I got detention for breaking my locker door again. Perry thinks I'm doing it on purpose." I didn't mind sitting around for a couple of hours. It's been a long time since I've been able to just do nothing.
"Which is what I want to talk to you about. You've been having some close calls with your bionics. So I've decided that until I can find a way to get your chip out, you're going to start training, so you can learn how to control your bionics."
"Training? I think I'll pass." I already did enough training with Douglas and Marcus.
"You can't."
"Come on. I know I've had a few close calls but for the most part, I'm able to control my bionics." I made the mistake of putting my hands close together which caused lightning to shoot from them, and it hit one of the computer monitors, essentially frying the circuits and the screen went black. Donald pointed to the broken computer and I smiled sheepishly.
"Yeah, sure you are."
"Can't you just put a block on my chip like Douglas did?" I asked. Honestly, I've been wondering why he hadn't done it yet. When I had to go to school he'd do it so I wouldn't glitch and accidentally reveal my bionics.
"Blocking the chip for long periods could have dangerous side effects. Douglas must have not known that, or he didn't care." I'm guessing it was the second one. I could tell Donald thought the same thing even if he didn't say it out loud. "Anyway, I'm having Adam, Bree, and Chase start teaching you. They'll be like your mentors." My eyes bulged out of their sockets.
"What? No no, that's not going to work." I protested and Donny crossed his arms.
"Why not?"
"Because two of them hate me." I said in a duh tone, referring to Adam and Chase.
"I'm hoping this will help erase any problems you guys have. They should be down any second. Here are some training clothes for you." A bundle of clothing is dropped in my arms and I looked at him, annoyed.
"So I don't get a say in this?" Donny sighed but didn't get angry.
"Harper, I'm trying to help you. Please, can you just cooperate?" Sighing, I nod and give in. Maybe this will be good. It'll be a distraction at least.
I went to go change. The training clothes consisted of a thick strap black tank top with the Davenport Industries logo in the top right corner and a pair of black leggings to match. I put my hair into a high ponytail as I walked back into the lab just as Adam, Bree, and Chase exited their capsules dressed in their own training clothes. They must have come in while I was changing. Leo was sitting on a stool off to the side, ready to watch me train. Donald was nowhere to be seen. Great.
"This is kind of weird, getting to train another bionic. I never thought we'd do something like that." Bree admitted.
"Let's hope it's not for long." I said cynically. Leo seemed confused with how unenthusiastic I was.
"How come you hate being bionic so much. If I had them, I'd be thrilled. They're awesome." I rubbed my chin and hummed.
"Let me think. Who wouldn't want to be kidnapped and have a computer chip planted into their neck without considering whether they actually want these abilities or that they live a completely normal life? But yeah, let's just focus on the 'awesome' factor. I can electrocute someone or turn them into a human crisp with laser eyes. The opportunities are endless!" Leo held his palms out and chuckled nervously while I did my best to calm down.
"Ok, you made your point." I smile thinly at him and hope he stays quiet for the remainder of the training session.
"Where do we start?" I asked turning to the other three. Bree looked between her brothers who acted like they couldn't hear me and rolled her eyes before stepping forward.
"How about super speed? You already have the running part down, so we can practice doing other things with it. Maybe some hand-to-hand combat?" I shrugged boredly.
"Sure."
We spent about one hour doing this. It was hard I'll admit because my reflexes were a lot faster than I'm used to and if I dodged a punch or kick I ended up losing balance because of how fast I was. Turns out having quicker reflexes had its downside if you didn't know how to control them. And if you overcorrected you might end up spinning out of control, which happened about ten times for me.
I finally called it quits. I think I got a little motion sickness from moving so fast and was on the verge of throwing up.
"You'll get better. It takes practice." Bree assured me when she saw how frustrated I was. I wanted to punch the wall.
"Are we done?" I asked impatiently, but I didn't get the reply I wanted.
"With super speed. Still got super strength and whatever Chase can teach you. Adam." Adam silently made his way over, and it was obvious he didn't want to do this. Bree went over by Chase and Leo, looking a little nervous. I was too. Adam and I haven't said a word to each other since I turned him down.
"Catch." Without warning, he threw a heavy ball I somehow didn't see he was holding at me and I barely caught it before it hit me square in the gut. I probably would have thrown up since I was already nauseous. I tossed it to the side and glared at Adam.
"Dude! A little warning would be nice!" I said while throwing my hands up.
"You shouldn't need one with your quick reflexes." Chase informed me just as Adam threw a larger ball at me. It was almost as big as I was. This one I had a harder time catching and I stumbled back a bit while grunting. It was way heavier and my legs ended up buckling from the weight and I fell along with the ball.
"Oh come on, it's not that heavy." Adam said, smirking as I got back up and blew a piece of hair that had come loose from my pony tail out of my face while glaring at Adam.
"How am I supposed to hold something that big and stay standing?" I demanded, getting the sickening feeling he was just messing with me. He wouldn't be that mean, would he?
"Figure it out yourself." I glanced between him and Chase who gave each other amused smiles that made my nauseousness come back. They were doing this on purpose, making a fool of me. Bree caught on to this and smacked Chase in the shoulder while yelling at her other brother.
"Adam!" She scolded and she came over to me. "You're supposed to have a strong center of gravity. You don't just lift with your arms, use your whole body instead of one part. And make sure you have a strong footing. Got it?" I swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat when my last meal threatened to make an appearance. Memories of past bullies were creeping out of the back of my mind where I'd hidden them when I decided to change myself and start fresh at Mission Creek High.
Bree put a hand on my shoulder and that snapped me out of my thoughts and I nodded after processing what she'd told me.
"Yeah, that makes kind of sense." Giving Bree a small smile, I focused my attention on the large ball. I won't let Adam and Chase get to me.
After taking a deep breath, I use both hands to lift it, making sure I keep my feet firmly planted on the ground, so I don't fall over again. Center of gravity. With great effort, I'm able to lift the ball over my head and toss it back to Adam who caught it. I let out a breathless laugh, amazed at what I did.
"Harper, that was amazing!" Bree exclaimed, and she ran over to give me a tight hug. Adam and Chase don't look so happy though, but I ignored them and hugged Bree back getting caught up in the moment. "Harper-can't breathe." Gasping, I let Bree go and apologized. I don't know my own strength.
"Super strength is a lot easier than I thought." I said, and I ran over towards the front and picked up one of the large yellow barrels with little effort. I tossed it across the room and pumped my fist in the air.
"Oh please, I was able to lift those when I was five." Adam said and my smile quickly left my face.
"Adam's right. Don't get too cocky, like you always do." Chase added and for a second my mask fell and Bree saw my hurt expression even though it showed for less than a second.
"Hey, Harper has a right to be excited if she wants. We should be encouraging her not tearing her down."
"Oh so do you want us to do a little happy dance every time she does something right?" Chase asked with mock excitement. This sparked my temper.
"Watch it, before I-"
"Before you what? Knock me out like you did in Antarctica?" Seriously, he still hasn't let that go?
"I already told you why I did it-" Chase interrupted me again which only stirred my anger more.
"You've told us a lot of things, most of which I don't believe. And I know there's more you're not telling us." I clenched my fists.
"I did tell you everything. You just can't accept that I'm a different person now. You think just because you're the smartest person in the world you know everything about me? Well, guess what, you don't, and I don't have to explain myself to you."
"You do if you're putting our family in danger. Admit it, you're hiding something and I will find out what it is." I suppressed the thought that said he was right and remained defensive.
"You'll end up sadly disappointed because you do know everything. And I think it's low to make me look like a fool just because you don't like me."
"You made us look like fools by pretending to be someone we could trust. But that doesn't seem to bother you, right?" I opened and closed my mouth, not able to respond. What could I say? I almost wanted to spill everything then and there, but one glance at Chase and Adam who looked pleased with my speechlessness stopped me.
I let out a combination of a sigh and laugh, still not able to form words. Staying silent, I walk around Chase and out of the lab, my way of saying training is over. I don't stop until I'm in the privacy of my room.
Shutting the door behind me, I slid down to the floor and put my head in my hands, unable to ignore that heaviness in my chest as it came back. I can't be mad at Chase and Adam for paying me back after what I did, especially when I'm still lying to them. I tell myself I deserve it.
I put a hand on my chest when a slight pain came from it. Must be from stress. It happened before, more often lately.
Even though it's only 7 o'clock, I decided to go to bed. I don't want to think about the secrets and lies anymore. I just want to escape the sad and miserable life that I created. It's all my fault.
I take a few steps towards the chair with my duffel bag but pause when I notice something weird happening. Glancing around, it felt like… it's hard to describe. Like everything was far away? I try to shrug off the uneasiness that came with it because I had no idea what was happening.
I went ahead and changed clothes, and by the time I finished the weird feeling was gone. Huh. Maybe it was a weird bionic glitch or something.
I lock the door before climbing into the bed, err, chair. Before I fall asleep I send Bree a quick text saying I went to bed early and didn't want to be bothered. Once that's done I pull the covers tight around me and try to escape into sleep.
The next morning I left before everyone else did, and used my super-speed to leave the house before Donald could try and talk to me.
I spent the whole day on autopilot. I couldn't stop the war going on inside my head, and it was driving me insane.
A couple of times I got that weird feeling where I detached from the world around me. That's the way I could describe it now that it's happened again. As if I didn't have enough to worry about, the feeling that something bad was going to happen kept plaguing the back of my mind, and it was really hard to shake off. I couldn't concentrate in my classes because of it.
At the end of the day Bree and Leo, who had been giving me space, came over to where I was at my locker.
"Hey." Bree greeted gently. I wave tiredly at them.
"Hey, guys."
"I'm sorry that training got out of hand yesterday. Mr. Davenport talked with Adam and Chase, so they're not off the hook." I at first didn't process what she said because the detachment feeling came back.
"Oh...well that's good I guess." I replied, and I looked away, so I could blink a few times and try to make the feeling go away.
"Are you ok?" I turned back to them and did my best to appear ok.
"Huh? Oh, yeah I'm fine. It's no big deal." They glanced at each other and Leo spoke next
"You sure. You've looked out of it all day. In Chemistry, you didn't answer when Ms. Unger called on you and I had to get your attention." I smirked at him.
"I think everyone knows I don't pay attention in class Leo."
"Yeah but-"
"Guys. I'm fine. Seriously." I assured and Bree got the message that I didn't want to talk about it anymore and changed the subject.
"Ok. Are you coming with us to the carnival that's in town for one night? Mr. Davenport said we could all go." I wrinkled my nose at this.
"Nah, carnivals aren't really my thing. I'll just hang at your place." Both of them nodded and left me alone after this. Maybe having some alone time will do me good.
PANIC ATTACK SCENE! DO NOT READ IF EASILY TRIGGERED!
I waited until everyone left before venturing out of the sewing room and going downstairs. I figured a little TV would get my mind off of everything.
First I had to go down to the lab to get my phone that I had left there yesterday. I hadn't been able to get back since I was avoiding everyone.
I was humming a tune as I exited the elevator, hoping it would help me relax from that feeling of dread that wouldn't go away. I stopped when I saw that Chase was sitting at the cyber desk.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, not hiding my annoyance at seeing him. "I thought everyone went to the carnival."
"Didn't feel like going." Was his simple reply. I nod slowly and focus on finding my phone. I spot it on the table by the capsules and go get it. I turn it on and walk while checking the notifications.
"Wait." Chase said when I almost reached the doors. "Can we talk for a sec?" I swiveled around and smiled thinly.
"Depends, is a refrigerator that I'm supposed to catch going to fall on me?" I asked and Chase sighed.
"You really don't make apologizing easy." he said and I pointed at him with a raised brow.
"Apologize, you?" He nodded, "And what exactly are you apologizing for?"
"For yesterday. It was out of line and…." I held up a hand.
"Just — just don't. Don't." I didn't deserve an apology. It was just making the guilt worse.
"Harper, I'm trying to say I'm sorry-"
"And I'm saying don't. It won't fix things." Chase threw his hands up and I expected an argument to ensue. I really didn't need this right now.
"I don't get it! You're mad at me when I'm mean to you and when I try to apologize you still aren't happy! What is it with you?"
"I don't have to explain myself to you!" I said getting worked up like he was.
"No, I think you do! I can't take this confusion anymore, it's driving me insane!" I laughed dryly.
"You think I like being this complicated? Cause let me tell you, it's no walk in the park being me."
"It wouldn't if you just admitted that you're hiding something and tell me what it is!"
"I can't!"
"Why not!"
"I just can't ok?!"
"Harper-"
I saw Chase saying something, but it sounded like it was far away, and I blinked a few times and tried to focus on his voice. I could see his lips moving, but the words weren't registering in my mind. The detachment feeling was back.
My hands went to grip whatever was in front of me, the cyber desk and I closed my eyes thinking it would help.
The heaviness in my chest got worse, and I tried to take a deep breath, but it didn't seem to help. In fact, I found that breathing was suddenly hard to do. I pulled against the collar of my shirt that felt too small, but it didn't help. Then I grew hot and rolled up my sleeves.
I heard a voice, and I'm not sure if it's still Chase as my eyes are now darting around the lab that now seems too small. The beeping coming from the computer monitors sound distorted and the walls seemed to be closing in. It caused a sudden wave of panic to go through me.
I needed to get out, my fight or flight instinct taking over. So I tried to super speed out of the lab, but I ended up running into the lab doors that I didn't know were closed.
Getting to my feet, my legs were noticeably shaking as I walked backward until my back hit something, causing me to jump and let out a shaky gasp. Chase appeared in front of me and I backed away, not wanting him near me.
My back hit the cyber desk and I slide down to the ground and wrap my arms that also shake uncontrollably around my legs. My heart is pounding and the pain is back. I don't think my heart has ever beat this violently before and it scared me.
When my vision went blurry, I realize tears are running down my face. I don't want them to leave my eyes, but they don't stop and then become tears of frustration. Why am I crying?
Thoughts start spiraling like the blizzard in my head and I can't make it stop.
I'm a liar.
I'm a manipulator.
I'm self-centered.
Those words and others keep repeating over and over.
I'm a terrible person.
I want them to stop, but they don't and keep coming. Everything that's happened for the last two months floods my mind. Being kidnapped. Made bionic. Running. Hiding. All the lying and manipulating. It's like a tornado of bad memories that I've tried to push away for so long.
Through the blurry vision, I saw a figure crouch in front of me. I jumped when a hand reached out and touched my shoulder, like it had burned me. I shoved it away blindly.
"Go-away." I said to Chase in between gasps. I don't want him to see me like this. Now I'm clutching my head as the thoughts get louder, and it's too much for me. I rock back and forth, wanting it all to stop.
Liar. Manipulator. Liar. Self-centered. Selfish. Liar.
My heart is racing, pounding against my rib cage like I'd just ran a marathon. The air I'm gasping in isn't enough to satisfy my lungs. I can't breathe. I can't breathe.
What's happening?
Am I dying? I think I'm dying. But I don't want to die.
I try to hold back the sobs but when one manages to escape my mouth I couldn't stop more from coming. I can't control anything I'm doing. I'm scared. My chest hurts. What do I do?
Somewhere through all the fear and turmoil, a voice reaches me, and when I try to respond all that comes out is a strangled noise.
The voice talks again, and I reach out with one of my shaking hands, terrified and needing to know someone is there. Something warm envelopes my hand and I find it comforting. Eventually, I can hear instructions being given.
"Breathe Harper. Breathe." I try to do as he says, but after a few tries, I begin to start crying and hyperventilating harder when I can't. "Hey hey. Focus on my voice. You're going to be ok. Try again. Breathe in." I do. "Good. Hold….Breathe out." I'm asked to repeat it and I do.
I don't know how long this goes on, but gradually I start calming down. My heart's still pounding, and I'm still shaking but not as bad as it had been. The thoughts haven't lightened up either.
At some point, I start to feel faint. Darkness threatens to consume me and I try to fight it off as long as possible. I'm starting to panic again, but the voice assures me I'll be ok, and somehow I know he's right. Keeping a death grip on his hand, I let the darkness take over.
My eyes open, and I'm confused when I see that I'm in the living room. If I'm sleeping, shouldn't I be in my room? Looking down I see I'm covered in a blanket and my shoes are on the floor.
I throw the blanket off me and sit up; my movements are sluggish and my head is killing me. I was exhausted.
When I hear footsteps I look up and see Chase coming over with a glass of water in his hands.
"Hey." He said softly, and I looked at him with confusion.
"What happened?" I asked, my throat dry and my voice is hoarse.
"You don't remember?" I shook my head as he sat down next to me. "Try and think." He coaxed, and I rubbed my forehead as I thought.
"I-we were in the lab, weren't we? Arguing." Chase nodded and gestured his hand to tell me to continue, "Then-Then… I'm drawing a blank." I massaged my temples and groaned quietly from the pain.
"Here, this should help with the headache." I'm handed a glass of water and a pill.
"Thanks." I down the pill and the entire glass of water. After finishing, I set it on the coffee table. "So what happened?" Chase grew nervous and didn't respond. "Chase?" I asked when he hesitated. He glanced at me briefly but didn't look fully at me when he sighed before answering.
"You had a….panic attack." Chase glanced at me when saying the last part, wondering what my reaction would be. It took a couple of seconds for me to find my voice.
"What? No. No that's not possible. I don't have panic attacks." I stated firmly, and Chase put a hand on my shoulder which I immediately shoved off. He sighed but remained calm.
"Harper-"
"Maybe it was something with my bionics," I suggested, thinking back to the other times today where I was feeling weird. I refuse to believe I had a panic attack. "They could have glitched or something."
"You had all the symptoms of a panic attack." He started listing them off, "Heart racing. Shaking. Hyperventilation. Shortness of breath. You could barely talk." Bits and pieces start coming back. I also thought I was dying, which is another symptom.
I bit my lip as the hard truth slapped me across the face. I had a panic attack. In front of Chase. That last thought made my face turn scarlet which Chase noticed.
"Don't feel embarrassed." He said trying to assure me, but it only made me feel worse, that he knew what I was feeling when I've been trying to keep myself from being an open book.
"I'm way past embarrassed and onto mortified." I drop my head in my hands and shake my head. " I can't believe it." I said, and it was muffled, but he understood, and again he tried to make me feel better.
"Harper, it's ok." My head shot up, and he shrunk back from the wild look I know I had in my eyes.
"No, it's not ok! I'm Harper McCallister, and I shouldn't have panic attacks." I said, on the verge of yelling.
"But you did!" I refused to listen to him and got up.
"No!" Chase grabbed me by my shoulders and turned me around, so I was facing him, but I kept my head down. I knew if I looked into his eyes I'd crack. And I couldn't. I wouldn't!
"Harper! You had a panic attack, and it's OK." He put a finger under my chin and made me look at him. His gaze was intense but also gentle somehow and I couldn't look away. "You're ok." He repeated firmly, and I opened my mouth to argue further, but instead, nothing came out. Stepping back, I put a hand over my mouth and tears pooled in my eyes. I didn't want them to fall, but Chase being so gentle while I was freaking out made it hard. Usually, he'd give it back to me but not this time. He was being strong... for me. No one has been this way for me.
Pulling me into a hug was my breaking point.
I cried. I cried so hard, pouring my emotions out with every tear. Every sob. I don't even know why I'm crying. I don't know if it's because I had a panic attack after trying to appear careless and strong for so long. Or because of why the attack happened, the guilt over everything I did finally breaking me. One thing I know, it was something horrible to go through, and I felt so fragile and embarrassed now.
I had fistfuls of Chase's shirt while I cried into his shoulder, but Chase didn't seem to mind. He cradled the back of my head with one hand while the other rubbed soothing circles on my back.
Like with the panic attack, I'm not sure how much time went by. Eventually, the tears stopped falling and my breathing slowly calmed down.
We sat back down on the couch and Chase brought me a wet towel to wipe away my smeared makeup as best I could. I probably already looked like a train wreck before the crying, now it's worse.
There was an awkward silence now, neither of us sure what to say. Eventually, I formulated a question to ask.
"Why did you help me?" I asked, wanting to know desperately.
"I couldn't just leave you alone while it happened."
"But after everything I did… you said it yourself. I was a liar and a manipulator and selfish. And… it's true. Everything you said was true." I thought I'd cried everything out but somehow more appeared in my eyes.
"Don't say that just to make me feel better-"
"I'm not. I-I didn't tell the whole truth to you guys." I blurted out, and now that the floodgates were open I couldn't stop the words as they spilled from my mouth. The rock on my chest got lighter as I revealed everything. "I was under the Triton App when Douglas captured you guys, but only for that short time. Everything that happened before that was my own doing, I spied on you and lied. In fact, I'm the reason Douglas found the lab in the first place. This was before I knew about the bionic stuff, he paid me to install cameras. I needed money and so I did it. Then, after I disappeared when I saw Bree use her super speed, Marcus kidnapped me, and I was turned bionic. After that, everything I did was because I couldn't go to the authorities without exposing the bionic secret. I was protecting myself. I only thought of myself, it's what I always have done. I was selfish, and we all paid the price for it."
I let out a long sigh after finishing and was too afraid to see what Chase's expression was. Despite that, I felt relief. Finally, everything was off my chest and there was no longer a heavyweight on it.
But the silence was unbearable, and I couldn't take it. "I should probably go." I got up, but my wrist was grabbed to prevent me from going.
"No, you can't run from this any longer."
"What else can I do?" I asked hopelessly and Chase thought for a moment and then finally spoke.
"We-you need to tell Mr. Davenport about this." He decided. I grew scared at the thought of telling the man who gave me a second chance the truth.
"What will he do to me? He gave me a second chance and I didn't deserve it." Chase sighed and shrugged.
"I… don't know what he'll do. But it's the right thing to do."
"Why are you not yelling at me? You should be furious." I expected him to snap at any moment.
"Because I think deep down you do care about other people. The fact that you feel guilty proves it."
"I could be faking." I suggested, testing him. But he wasn't swayed by the comment.
"No one can fake a panic attack. At least, no one can fool me. I am the smartest person in the world." My eyes widened when I remembered another secret. "What?" Chase asked, and I gave him a sheepish look.
"Well, I just remembered…. There's something else I did. I went behind Donny's back and…. Gave myself superintelligence."
"You did what?!" He shouted, and I flinched but was quick to back up my statement with a reason, though as I said it I know it wasn't a good one.
"I had a lot of catching up to do in school and knew I wouldn't get it done by myself!"
"You could have asked me for help!"
"You were mad at me!"
"How do I know you're not just messing with me? Recite the first fifty numbers of pi." I rolled my eyes but did.
"3.1415926535 8979323846 2643383279 50288419716939937510." After finishing, I clutched my head as it started hurting. "Ow."
"Wow, this is-this is- I don't know what to think." He began pacing and bit his nails as he processed this, "On one hand, I'm mad you did this behind Mr. Davenport's back, but the other is ecstatic at having someone with equal intelligence and can understand everything I say!"
"I don't think I've ever seen you like this." He looked at me and had this weird grin. I chuckled at how cute it looked, and maybe a little scary. It's hard to tell what goes on in that head sometimes. But it did cheer me up.
"This is so awesome!" He finally said, barely containing his excitement and bouncing on his feet. Now I was a little scared because I imagined the gears turning in his head, thinking about... I don't think I want to know.
The happy moment came to an end when we heard a car door close. Oh no, they're home.
I used my super speed to get me and Chase down to the lab before anyone came in. I needed to talk to Chase about something.
"What are you doing?" I put a finger to his lips, and spoke quickly.
"If I promise to tell Davenport about the lies, will you keep the panic attack thing a secret? Please?" He removed my finger.
"Harper-" I gripped his shoulders.
"Please. I don't need any of the others to feel bad for me or make fun of me."
"They won't make fun of you." I gave him a pleading look, and he sighed, "Ok. I'll keep it a secret."
"Thanks. I'll owe you big time. Oh- your shirt!" I exclaimed pointing to the dark blotch of black eyeshadow and mascara that's a stark contrast from the blue of the plaid shirt. Chase took it off, leaving him in his regular lighter blue t-shirt, and I took it and super sped across the lab to toss it in a random box by the capsules.
We heard the elevator coming down, so I shoved Chase down in a chair and I sat on another with a random magazine that was left laying around.
I was pretending to read it when the elevator opened and in came the whole family minus Tasha.
"There you guys are. Everything ok?" Chase and I glanced at each other, wondering if they knew. My hands grew sweaty.
"Yeah, why?" I asked nervously. Davenport pointed at the both of us with a concerned expression.
"You're in the same room and not trying to kill each other." Both of us visibly relaxed.
"We uh, patched things up." Chase answered and I looked at him surprised. He motioned for me to go along with it and I remembered we had an audience witnessing this exchange.
"Yep." I said, and Donald looked at us both with relief.
"Good! I'm glad, now we can all move forward and start anew." Chase glanced at me and even though I wanted to run, I knew I had to tell Donald the truth.
"Yeah um, about that… there's something I have to tell you guys." I go on and repeat everything I said to Chase not ten minutes ago. When I finished there was an awkward silence like it happened with Chase, and it took everything in me to not super speed to some unknown place in the middle of nowhere where I could crawl in a hole and live out the rest of my days. When I glanced at Chase he gave me a reassuring nod and that helped calm my nerves a little.
"Well, I have to say I'm very disappointed in you Harper. You should have been completely honest from the beginning."
"I know, I just was afraid you'd keep me locked up forever if you knew the whole truth." I admitted.
"You did the right thing by telling us. What made you do it?"
"The guilt was eating me alive, and I couldn't take it anymore. I'm sorry. I'm really really really sorry. If I could go back and change everything I would."
"Don't beat yourself up about it too much. I get the feeling you're used to doing things on your own. But you don't have to anymore, you have us. Right guys?" Everyone nodded, including Adam. But I looked down.
"I don't know. I'm not worthy of help. It's too late for me."
"No, you're not. You have the potential to be someone great, and we can help you achieve that." I became hopeful for a brief moment, but doubt crept back into my mind.
"You don't have to do this." I told him. Davenport put a hand on my shoulder and smiled.
"I want to. You just need to believe in yourself." I bit my lip and nodded.
"I guess... I can try. Just, don't get your hopes up." I warned but Davenport didn't look too worried.
"One day you'll look back and know that I was right. Trust me." Despite the doubt, I smiled. It was a small one, barely noticeable, but it was genuine.
But deep down, a voice told me to not get my hopes up. These people could just as easily give up on me as others have in the past. I still need to keep my guard up. Just in case.
Man, this was a super long chapter! Hope you enjoyed it!