A/N Well, here is another chapter finally. I am sorry about the horrible delay. I have no excuse. I can only assure you I will finish every story I have. I want to thank you that have reviewed. I also want to express my appreciation for all those that are still reading. I still own nothing.
Zack sat quietly in his apartment, nursing a beer. He was tempted to go out and get drunk again but knew he couldn't do that.
He had been happy when Alex called him and said she wanted to talk. But at the same time, he wondered what she was going to say that would change the situation.
When she presented her suggestion about the science classes and setting aside time to discuss scientific things, he had first been hopeful but the more he looked at it, he realized it didn't address the basic problem; that she was not comfortable with him not being able to understand. He perhaps wasn't being fair with her, but he just couldn't help but feel she was throwing him a bone, trying to satisfy him by having him take a class, then allowing him a limited time to discuss science.
Maybe he was the one in the wrong. She seemed to feel that the main reason he wanted to be with her was because she would be able to talk with him about science, to have someone to try to help him to understand. She seemed to think that was a bad thing.
The problem was, she was right about that being part of why he was attracted to her. He loved that she was smart, that she knew about science. He was in awe about how she worked with Leonard. He had been so proud and amazed when Leonard had talked to them about the Nobel Prize.
He also loved her because of her smile, because she was a good person. He enjoyed being with her, but apparently she was also bothered by spending too much time together as well.
He sighed, remembering how she had looked expectantly at him after she had finished telling him what she perceived to be a solution. He felt himself tearing up as he remembered the look on her face when he tried to explain that although he appreciated what she was doing, her efforts to make it work, it just made him realize it wasn't going to work between them. He tried to explain how he could not help feeling that she was bothered by his inability to understand. That no matter what she said, it was apparent she could not accept who he was.
He had not been surprised when she got upset and told him he was wrong, that they did belong together.
She had then shocked him when she told him about his sister stopping by. That she understood why science was so important to him. Then she had said something the made him know for sure he was right about them. She had said he needed to put that behind him, that he needed to quit dwelling on it; that Adam was dead and he needed to give up on his obsession with science.
He knew she was upset, angry, and hurt, but her words had stunned him. She would never understand how much Adam's death had affected him. Oh, he had learned to cope, but he still felt the pain, the guilt. He knew he would never be a scientist, but that wasn't what it was about. It was that by being interested in science, he was honoring Adam's memory. Each time, he understood even a little bit, he felt a deep burst of satisfaction, of pride.
He knew that was why he felt so grateful to Leonard. He seemed to understand in a way that Alex never would. He didn't love science because he wanted to fulfill Adam's dream, he loved it because Adam had loved it.
He realized he needed to talk to his sister as well. He knew she was trying to help, but she needed to understand how personal Adam's death was to him.
Leaving Alex had been the hardest thing he had ever done. He would never forget the memory of her crying on the couch. He wanted to hold her, to ease her pain, to tell her it would be okay, that they could be together, but he knew he needed to leave. They both needed to move on.
He suddenly needed to get out of his apartment. He thought of going to his sister, but wasn't ready to face her yet. He finally decided to go to the dance club. To try to have some fun, to forget for a while.
Alex stared at the door, thinking it couldn't end like this, that he would come back. When it was apparent that wasn't going to happen, she took a deep breath. She found herself getting angry. What the Hell did he want from her? She had tried to work with him, to find a way for them to be together. How could he just throw away what they had? She was tired of being the one who was hurt. She was lucky she had found out how he felt. She had been right; he just saw her as someone who could help with his obsession. He had given no thought to how she felt, of her needs.
Well, she was done crying over him. To Hell with him. She smirked, to Hell with all men. She was not going to be hurt again. The next time she would be the one who was in control. She was not going to put her heart out there again.
She sighed, what was wrong with her? First Leonard and now Zack.
She went and got a bottle of wine. As she poured herself a glass, she decided she needed to take a long look at her life.
Leonard had taken a day off from work without telling Penny. He picked up Amy and Bernadette and they started a tour of several Jewelry stores they had identified. They had decided they would not make any decision until they had visited all of them. If they couldn't agree on anything, they would go to some others.
But all their careful plans went out the window when the visited the fourth store on their list. They were stunned when they saw it. Each of them knew that was the one. They were even more astonished when they started to talk and found they all felt the same.
They were still feeling a little giddy when Leonard purchased it and they were back outside. Since they now had time to spare, they all went out to lunch. When they asked Leonard how he planned to propose, he looked surprised and said he just was going to do it at the apartment.
Amy and Bernadette quickly told him he needed to be more original. After hearing all sorts of ideas of hiding the ring in various substances, Leonard suggested he could do it at a romantic location.
After some more discussion, Amy suggested they go away for the weekend and he could ask her there.
Leonard was shocked when Alex called him and told she was no longer going to work with him on the project. She told him she had arranged to take a leave of absence. She told him she needed to get away for a while. He tried to find out what was wrong but she just said she was sorry about abandoning him, but it was something she had to do.
She told him she would understand if he changed his mind about her and the Nobel ceremony.
He quickly assured her he still felt she deserved to be recognized. Realizing she was adamant, he wished her the best and that if she changed her mind, the job was open.
After she hung up, he immediately called Penny, who was as shocked as he was. After he hung up, Penny knew she should stay out of it, but Alex was her friend. She also felt a little guilty because she had a feeling this was about Zack.
Alex had finished crying after she hung up from Leonard. She was finishing up and getting ready to head for the airport when there was a knock on her door.
Her suspicions of who it was were confirmed when Penny answered.
Her first inclination was to tell her to go away, but she realized she did want to talk to someone.
Penny came in and saw the luggage in the living room. She also could see that Alex had been crying.
Alex sat on the couch, "So, Leonard called you, huh?"
Penny sat down across from her in a chair, "Yeah."
They sat in silence for a few moments and then Alex said, "I appreciate what you are trying to do, but my mind is made up." She sighed, "I have to leave for the airport."
Penny took a deep breath, "Does this have something to do with Zack?"
Alex sat quietly for a long time, then said quietly, "He broke up with me. He told me it was over."
"I am so sorry. I can't help but feel guilty. I was the one that got you together."
Alex managed a smile, "Don't be. We had a lot of good times." She sighed, "I didn't realize how important this whole science things was to him." She took a deep breath, "He felt I couldn't accept who he was." After a long pause, "Maybe he was right."
"Where are you going? How long will you be gone?"
"I am going to go home. It's been a while since I have seen my folks. As for how long, I am not sure. At least a couple weeks. Then I will have to make a decision. Before I settled on Caltech, I had other offers."
Penny was stunned, "It is your decision, but I hope you decide to come back. You have friends here. I know that Leonard and I will miss you very much. You know how important you are to him."
Alex felt a burst of anger, "It is easy for you to say that. You are with him."
She sat back, "I am sorry, I know you two belong together." She sighed, "I am just tired of being the one that is pushed aside. Maybe I need a fresh start."
Penny didn't know what to say. She finally moved over and sat next to her, putting her arm around Alex's shoulder, "I understand. But don't decide anything right away. I hope you can come back and give it another chance. I would really hate to lose you."
"I would miss you guys too. I don't know what will happen but whatever I decide, I will try to keep in contact."
Penny hugged her, tearing up a little, "I'm glad."
Alex hugged her back, also fighting back tears.
They stayed that way for a time, but then Alex said, "I need to fix myself up and head for the airport."
Penny nodded, "Do you want me to give you a ride?"
Alex considered that, "No, I think I will take a cab, if that's okay."
"Of, course." She hesitated, "Let us know how you're doing."
"I will." She paused, "Thank you for coming, Penny."
"You're welcome." She managed a small smile, "That what friends are for."
They exchanged goodbyes and with one last hug, Penny left.