And this is it, my friends. The last chapter is here.

I couldn't dream of so many awesome reviews and PMs. Thank you a lot for staying with me on this ride until the end.

Special thanks to SteveFan81 for medical input, support, and encouragement during writing this monster.

20th December
1 year later

It´d been two years since the heavy fire cascaded on their team of ten. Two years since he´d watched his brothers-in-arms die. Two years since he and his two comrades had been captured, not knowing what they would be forced to go through for what had felt like an eternity, not knowing if they would ever get back home. Two years since everything went sideways and changed the lives of many people.

Two years since he´d broken a promise to the people he loved.

Sitting in the recliner, staring into space, he went through the names and faces of each of the fallen soldiers. Dan Riley, Liam Jackson, Ethan Lewis, Tom Jamison, Chris Quinn. The five men he´d lost in the ambush. David Lynch, who had died right after the rescue. And all those who he´d lost in the battles before Five-0. Too many to count, yet he remembered them all.

A loud knock on the door dragged him from the darkness of his memories back to the present. Reluctantly, he stood up and shuffled over to the door, psyching himself up to get himself together and put on a happy mask before opening the door.

But the faked smile changed into a real one as soon as the door opened, and a tiny figure crashed into his body, wrapping the tiny hands around his waist.

"Hi, uncle Steve!" Charlie snuggled closer and the love sparkling in his eyes nearly melted Steve´s heart.

"Hey, buddy." Steve hugged Charlie too and lifted his gaze to Danny and Grace walking over to him.

Charlie let go, and Grace came for her turn. "Hi, uncle Steve," she said, giving him a light hug.

"Hey." His smile turned into a confused grimace when he let his visitors in and got a better look at the kids. "What´re the backpacks for?"

"Danno said we could stay over for the night," Charlie explained.

"Oh, did he?" Steve looked up, meeting Danny´s eyes.

Danny shrugged. "If you don´t mind," he said. "I got tired of listening to the same question over and over again, so I said yes."

"If I don´t mind?" Steve said, his heart fluttering. "Are you kidding me? I´d love that."

"See? I told you." Grace´s lips curled into a smile as her look shifted from Steve to Danny.

"Uncle Steve?" Charlie tugged at Steve´s t-shirt. "You won´t miss this Christmas, will you?"

Steve stiffened with the question. He´d missed two in a row. First one he´d spent in captivity, the second one he simply wasn´t able to function properly after coming to the point he´d nearly taken his life. So when Rachel wanted the kids to be with her for the holidays, Danny didn´t argue and used it as an opportunity to stay with Steve and make sure his friend wasn´t going to do anything stupid. Which, obviously, wasn´t a reason to celebrate.

If he was honest with himself, he didn´t even think Danny would let the kids anywhere near him after lashing out at Charlie and Steve´s psychotic breakdown. But he did, and Steve would be forever grateful for that. Realizing they were one of the main reasons he wanted to get better, Steve had tried his best to be the uncle they both deserved ever since. It didn´t always work, and some days he just couldn´t tame the monster inside his mind, but Danny learned to sense when it was and wasn´t a good idea to bring the kids to lighten up Steve´s day.

"Charlie, go get unpacked with your sister, okay?" Danny suggested, noticing Steve´s discomfort.

"No, it´s okay, Danny," Steve said and smiled at Charlie, who waited for Steve´s answer patiently. "Look, buddy, I´m really sorry I´ve missed the last two Christmas with you guys. But I´ll make up for it this year, okay?"

"Does that mean that you will help us bake the Christmas cookies?"

"It means we´ll bake the best cookies on the island. How about that?" A warm feeling spread through Steve´s chest when sparkle returned into Charlie´s eyes.

"That would be great," Charlie said, a smile stretched over his face.

"Oh, and don´t forget you´re gonna decorate the Christmas tree with us too," Grace said.

Steve bit his lip. "Uh, I don´t have a tree, though." If he knew the kids would want to be around, he would get one for sure. But considering this time of year meant painful memories coming to the surface, he wasn´t in a jolly mood. "And I don´t think I would get a nice one this late."

"Nice try," Danny joined in. "I knew you weren´t ready. We´ve got a tree on the car. And you´re not getting away with excuses this year."

Steve shifted his gaze to Danny. Today was the day memories came flooding, threatening to suck him in, but the look in Danny´s eyes told him his best friend knew. That it was the reason he was here today. The reason the kids were here. To take his mind off the painful past and make him focus on the good things in his life. To let him see that his ohana loved him no matter what.

"How about you guys go unpack," Danny suggested. "And me and uncle Steve will bring the tree inside meanwhile."

Steve watched Grace and Charlie leave, thinking about how grateful he was for having them in his life. Danny and his kids were his anchor, his light in the darkness, and maybe they didn´t know that, but they were his reason to keep fighting to get his life back even if it wasn´t easy.

"You´re doing it again, Steve," Danny said. "You´ve got your brooding face on. Don´t you dare to zone out on me. We´ve got work to do."

"A brooding face?" Steve scrunched his brows. "I don´t have a brooding face."

"Yeah, you do," Danny retorted. "When I see it I just know the wheels are spinning in that dopey head of yours and your mind is likely to go wherever it usually goes."

Steve shook his head. He knew what Danny was talking about. It was a defense mechanism of his brain, as he was told, to shut down and zone out even in the middle of a conversation. He´d learned a few grounding techniques to help him stay in reality, but it was still an everyday struggle to remain focused. That wasn´t the case right now, though.

"I´m not zoning out. I was just thinking about… about how much you guys have done for me," Steve said, surprised by how easy it was to get it out. Maybe a year of therapy did help in a way.

"We just bought a tree, that´s all," Danny said.

"Not what I´m talking about." That seemed to get Danny´s attention.

Steve sucked in a breath, looking for the right words. The last two years took their toll on Danny too. But no matter how horrible Steve was, Danny still pushed his wheelchair when he couldn´t walk. He still went with him to his follow-up appointments. He still either stayed around or stopped by after work. He still listened every time Steve wanted to get something out.

Not once during that time did Danny act like he´d had enough, or that he thought Steve was demented or weak. He assured him that anyone who had been through what Steve had seen, and done, would have also responded as he did. That it was completely normal to push back when hurting like that.

The wear and tear of PTSD, anger, and depression had etched lines in Steve´s face that refused to smooth out even when he was relaxing. His body ached constantly, his shoulder was perpetually stiff, and his legs were still a mess. But above all, the psychological issues should have sent up the "Warning! Do not approach!" red flags to everyone including Danny. His best friend had already seen the temper flare-ups and drastic mood swings, but he kept talking to Steve. More than that. He kept doing everything in his power to keep his promise and help Steve get his life back.

When Steve had given up, and decided it would be better for everyone if he just died, an innocent text from Danny had saved him. And he had kept saving him, sticking with him when he had every reason to leave.

"You know, I wouldn´t be here without you, Danny," Steve said eventually. "You saved my life. In more ways than one." He cleared his throat. "Thank you, buddy. For everything."

Danny´s eyes softened. "You don´t have to thank me, Steve," he said, "I´m just here for my family, that´s all. You´d do the same if the roles were reversed."

"Yeah, I do," Steve argued, even knowing Danny was right and he would do the same.

"Come here you big, soft, goof." Danny spread his arms in an inviting gesture and waited for Steve to sink into his embrace. "Thank me by not getting into trouble again, okay?"

Steve´s lips curled upwards. "I´ll try," he said, taking in the comfort Danny´s hug provided.

They stayed like that for a few seconds. "So, will you help me get that thing inside or what?" Danny said eventually, gesturing toward the doorway.

Steve was about to step forward when a phone buzzed in his pocket. He checked the caller ID and froze. With his eyes on the screen, he could feel his chest tighten as he read Richardson´s name.

"You should answer that," Danny said, peeking at Steve´s phone. "The tree can wait a few more minutes."

"I don´t know if it´s a good idea," Steve hesitated, staring at the screen.

"He thinks it is."

Steve stabbed his eyes into Danny. "You´ve been in contact with him?"

Danny shrugged. "He called me when he couldn´t reach you. Asked how you were doing."

"You didn´t tell him…"

"No," Danny interrupted him. "I didn´t say anything, okay? But maybe you should talk to him. Could be good for both of you."

That´s what his therapist had suggested in the hope they could help each other heal. But Richardson had stopped trying to contact Steve months ago and Steve didn´t find the courage to face him just yet anyway. He wasn´t angry at him. Not anymore. But the guilt was still gnawing on him for what had happened in that damn desert and facing the rest of the survivors meant facing it. And he wasn´t sure he was ready.

"You know, today´s hard on him too," Danny added. "He could use a friend. And I doubt there´s anyone who understands what he´s going through better than you do."

Danny´s words tugged at Steve´s feelings. Unlike Richardson, he had Danny, his kids, the team, Joe, Gutch, and the rest of his ohana to lean on. But Lynch was gone and with him probably the only person that could save Richardson from himself. He had no family as far as Steve knew and the only people checking up on him occasionally were Davis and Martinez.

"Okay," Steve agreed eventually. The phone stopped ringing meanwhile. "I´ll call him back."

A victorious smile spread over Danny´s face. "Take your time," he said. "I´ll go check on the kids."

Taking a deep breath, Steve tapped the call button.

It was yet another little thing Danny had done in order to help him - pushing him in the right direction, forcing him to face his fear and guilt and try to move on, but also help someone who might need him to do the same.

The call stretched out to nearly half an hour, and it swirled the emotions Steve didn´t know about, or didn´t want to admit. But in the end, he was glad he listened to Danny´s advice. It took the crushing weight off his chest and allowed him to take another step on the long road of recovery.

And as the day progressed, Steve realized how far he´d come already.

A year ago, he would probably get agitated and lash out at Danny for his unplanned overnight stay, Grace´s constant giggles, and Charlie´s running around. But not today. Today the sound of their laughter felt like music to his ears. Today their presence pushed the darkness on his mind aside, and let him see the light.

Every ounce of progress, every step in the right direction added up to something significant. Spilling his heart out to Danny after hitting the rock bottom exactly a year ago wasn´t a cure to his PTSD. It was like lancing a wound and draining an evil black fluid from his soul. But the infection was still there and would continue to fester.

He realized how close he came to death that day. How close he was to being lifeless and gone, with family and friends left to deal with the aftermath. He knew something had to be done. He didn´t really want to put in the work to get better. But with everything on the line, he had called a therapist the first thing in the morning after that incident. It was a small step, and alone it would have meant nothing. This wasn´t something that could be cured by a few sessions on a couch with a shrink. It wasn´t a puppy you smack with a rolled-up newspaper and it behaves. A ravening monster that was consuming everything it got near was living inside him and he knew it wouldn´t be easily or quickly defeated.

But he had to try.

On a personal level, he was far from "cured" of his PTSD issues. Sometimes the whole process felt like two steps forward and one, or more, back.

There were good days, when PTSD left him alone. During those times, he was happy, relaxed, and calm. He felt better physically and healthier physiologically. In spirit, he was a little closer to the man he had used to be and a bit farther from the monster who punched his best friend in a frenzy of rage and yelled at the five-year-old who just wanted to spend time with him.

There were bad days, when he didn´t want to get out of the bed. Those were the days most of the people didn´t want to be around him, though Danny and the rest of Steve´s supportive ohana were there.

He still dealt with depression, anxiety, rapid mood swings, and fits of anger. Sleep could be elusive. Ghosts, those of his friends and those of his enemies, still haunted him in his nightmares.
He knew he would never be free of some of what he´d seen and done. But he understood it better now and realized it would be a constant struggle.

He had to face his demons. Hat to try to expel them even though he knew not all of them would want to go. He didn´t always feel like going to battle with the stuff buried deep down. It was hard work. Dark work. It was freaking miserable at times. But staying where he was wasn´t an option if he wanted any kind of life.

As his therapist said at the beginning of their sessions - the pain of his past wouldn´t go away in the future unless he dealt with what was making him miserable today. And the stuff he was carrying around was a heavy load on others who loved him, too.

So he was willing to try whatever worked. He just knew that if he did nothing, nothing would change.

It wasn´t a comfortable process. Steve was fighting the biggest battle of his life and on the bad days, he wondered if he was up to the task. The odds were against him and all he could do was keep putting one foot in front of the other and, hopefully with his family and friends by his side, get to the other side of a mountain.

His soul and heart, as well as his body, had blisters and scars on them, he was wounded in many ways, exhausted from the constant battle taking place in his mind, sometimes even beyond human endurance.

But he could do this.

Armed with knowledge, love, and persistence, he knew he would defeat the demon that is PTSD.

He just had to keep moving forward, always forward, until the end.

*THE END*

I have to admit that I'm a bit sad this story is over, but it had to come to an end at some point.

I really hope you enjoyed reading it despite some of the chapters being hard to read.

Some of you have already told me I managed to connect with you through the difficult topic of this story - which is the best compliment I've ever got. I think that every writer, whether a professional or amateur, aims exactly for that. So I'm really glad I managed that.

Once again, HUGE THANKS to all of you!