Be Courageous

by alexajaye

Sequel to Be Not Afraid. Changes are coming, and there is a path for everyone. Ragnar returns from battle, but his family has changed. Lilith is growing into a young woman, but nothing seems right. Athelstan watches the world around him change, and he can barely keep up. And the West calls to them all, fulfilling a destiny forged by their own hands. Part 2 of a Series.

35. Homecoming, Part I

It's here! The last chapter! Well, half of it anyway. When I started writing this, I had a feeling it would be long, but I did not anticipate it being THIS long. But so much happens, and we're tying up a few loose ends, sort of, so the lenth is necessary.

We're starting out in Athelstan's perspective, and we're including a few notable scenes from the show that should be recognizable, even if I have tweaked them a little.

And I hope you've enjoyed the story thus far. I know I've enjoyed writing it.

Enjoy!

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Homecoming

The first thing Athelstan noticed about Kattegat when he saw it for the first time after a year, other than the people who had gathered on the beach and the docks to welcome them back, was the third set of docks that lay situated on the eastern end of town. In his absence, Ragnar had expanded in anticipation of the town's growth, and this pleased Athelstan more than he realized it would. His friend was realizing his dreams quickly, and it was only a matter of time before Ragnar had everything he'd wanted several years earlier when they'd still been on the farm.

As they got closer to the main dock, Athelstan rose from where he'd been sitting with Lilith and Gyda, his heart pounding in his chest as he gazed into the crowd for the faces of his extended family. He had missed so much, and he knew it would take at least another year for him to learn it all, if Ragnar gave him the time. Lilith stood up then and moved to his side, wrapping her arm around him as she still held their daughter close to her chest.

"Many people have missed you, husband," she whispered as he turned his lips to her cheek and then lifted them to the side of her face. "Focus on those people. No one else matters."

Athelstan sighed as he lay his cheek against her forehead, his eyes again finding the docks and wondering just how many people wouldn't be expecting him to come back. Dozens? Hundreds?

Lilith was right. It didn't matter now.

Thankfully, as soon as they docked and a group of men that included Torstein carried Rollo off the boat to take him to Elisef, two faces Athelstan had missed seeing every day emerged from the crowd waiting with equally bright smiles that were directed at both him and Lilith.

"You're home!" Edda cried and threw her arms around him.

Athelstan was surprised for only a split second, folding his arms around her and holding her as close as he ever had. "I'm home," he whispered and lifted his gaze to Tait, reaching for his hand and smiling again when it was extended for him to take.

"We've been waiting patiently for your return since the first horn sounded," Tait revealed even as Edda released Athelstan and stepped away from him, blushing. "Lili was certain of your return, and she refused to let anyone believe any differently.

Athelstan glanced at Lilith as she stepped off the boat with Bjorn's help, reaching for her as well and holding her against him. "I gathered that much when I saw her for the first time in a year," he teased and kissed her cheek. Then he kissed her lips. "And I am grateful for her faith in me."

Gyda stepped in then, nudging them all on. "Yes, well, I am thirsty," she half-complained with a smile on her face, "and we can move this reunion into the Great Hall where I'm sure our Step-Mother has everything waiting for us."

Lilith smirked and glared at sister, wrapping her arm around Athelstan again, and he laughed softly, glancing at Edda and Tait and nodding for them to lead the way. Nothing else was said as they left the docks together, the people around them who had greeted them waving and smiling as they passed them.

The street that led them to the Great Hall seemed short and long all at once, still lined with people who greeted them and smoother with more activity from horses and carriages and people running around. Not even the passageways in the villa had been so well-used, but that was a restricted place. In Kattegat, anyone could go anywhere they wanted. Though Athelstan hadn't been a prisoner of Ecbert's after many months, there had still been places where he wasn't allowed to go. Now he could go anywhere he wished.

A man he didn't know smiled at him and shook his hand as he passed him, as did a woman who looked like she wanted to have her way with him. Lilith seemed to notice, leaning up to whisper in his ear.

"Try not to be so surprised, husband," she teased. "Most of the women here know that you got me with child on our honeymoon, and around here, a man who can do that is a valuable commodity. Thank all the gods you're already mine, no?"

He blushed helplessly as he laughed, holding her closer to him and bowing his head as they arrived at the Great Hall.

The activity inside was as loud as it had been outside, with people gathering inside, collecting their ale and food and then disseminating to another room or table where they could eat and drink.

"Welcome home! To all of you, and thank the gods!"

Athelstan knew this voice. He hadn't heard it in a year, but he would know it anywhere, gently pushing through the crowd and discovering Aslaug there with Tova and Asa. She smiled when she saw him, setting down the cup in her hand and hurrying to where he was before he could get far.

"You came back!" she exclaimed, wrapping her arms around him for the first time since they'd met. "My son! We were so worried. Please tell me you are all right, Athelstan."

Somehow, he'd managed to step onto the platform to the side of the main hall and now stood above her with his hands over her arms. "I'm all right," he promised her. "It is good to see you, Princess. And of course, I came back. This is my home, after all, and you and Ragnar and the boys. Gyda and Bjorn. You're all my family. How could I ever have not returned to this place when I belong here with all of you?"

Aslaug blushed for the first time since he'd met her, still holding his arms as she turned her gaze to Lilith and then turned to face her.

"Step-daughter," she whispered and enfolded her in her arms along with their daughter who had only just begun to stir. "I dreamt of this happening. It is always best to have a good omen come to pass, and we are all a family again."

Lilith embraced her step-mother and kissed her cheek, stepping away from her to join Athelstan as he poured her a cup and took one for himself.

Bjorn and Gyda arrived then when Lagertha, and being the hostess she was, Aslaug greeted her husband's former wife with the same grace she had the first time.

"Lagertha," she said and bowed her head, "it is good to see you again. You are most welcome. I hope you will stay."

Aslaug handed her a cup of ale that had already been poured, and with a glanced in Athelstan and Lilith's direction, Lagertha took the cup and then brought her own hand up to claim Aslaug's. Athelstan was visibly surprised, and Lilith noticed, lifting her hand to the side of his face as she stood in front of him.

"Many things to catch up on," she reminded him.

He smirked then and scoffed, bowing his head.

Lagertha moved off to sit down, leaving Bjorn there with Gyda, and just before he could greet Aslaug, Edda came into the main room with Þórunn behind her. That was when Athelstan noticed how differently they were dressed, and Bjorn noticed it as well. Had something happened between them while Athelstan had been gone?

Thankfully, Bjorn remembered his manners, turning to Aslaug and bowing slightly. "Princess," he said with a nod.

Aslaug bowed her head as well and grinned. "Bjorn," she greeted and looked behind her where Edda and Þórunn still stood. Her smiled grew as she turned her gaze to Athelstan and Lilith, stepping aside and then speaking so they could all hear her. "I have made the decision to release both Edda and Þórunn from my service," she revealed, adding, "as free women. They are no longer my slaves."

Athelstan glanced at Lilith, seeing her smile and then looking at Bjorn to see the same expression on his face.

Edda moved first, around Bjorn to be in front of Lilith. "I wanted to say it as soon as I saw you," she gushed and embraced Lilith as completely as she ever had. "It has only been a little while, but I'm adjusting." She leaned away from Lilith and lifted her gaze to Athelstan. "I have only wanted my freedom a short time, but I have both of you to thank for that. I get to choose what to do with my life now, and I have never wanted anything more than that before now."

She reached for his hand then, still holding onto Lilith and making her newest decision as plain as the sea and the sky. Athelstan looked at Lilith again and then at their daughter as she still rested against her mother's chest. Less than six weeks ago, he'd had nothing to hold in his arms or keep in his heart the way Lilith always had been. He'd cared for Margaret and Aethelwyn, and he'd befriended Judith, but they hadn't really been his. Ecbert and Aethelwulf had made sure of that.

But now he had something that was his. He had something that no one could take away from him, in his daughter and in Lilith, and now he had this amazing, compassionate young woman in his life who he'd seen grow into adulthood and who now had this little corner of his heart all to herself. He didn't know how it was possible. His heart was so full he thought it might explode from happiness.

"Edda," he said softly, folding his arm around her with her hand still in his. "Would you please come to live with me and Lili and our daughter? I know you were there when she was born. It only makes sense that you be there to watch her grow up with us."

The laugh that bubbled up from her chest caused him to do the same, and she bowed her head slightly as he held her against him.

"Nothing would make me happier," she answered and then lifted her head. "Yes, Athelstan. And who knows? Perhaps I will watch all of your future children grow up as well."

He blushed as he leaned in and kissed her cheek, lifting his lips to her temple and whispering. "I insist upon it, my dear Edda."

He leaned back to look at her and then at Lilith as she watched them with an amused expression on her face. For a split second, he thought he had overstepped, and he let go of Edda before Lilith spoke again.

"I knew the two of you would work something out," she still teased. "And now that this is out of the way, perhaps it will get back to normal around here." She leaned in and kissed his cheek gently, releasing him as she now cradled Iðunn in both her arms. "I'm going to put our daughter down for her nap. Come, Edda. My husband has many more people to catch up with besides us."

Edda grinned and bowed her head, waiting while Athelstan kissed his wife and his daughter and then following Lilith away to the back of the Great Hall. Athelstan watched them until he couldn't see them anymore, looking around the Hall and noticing a few changes that hadn't been there the last time he had been.

He knew life had gone on without him here, and it saddened him that he had missed it. He knew it was no good to want it back, but that didn't stop him from doing it all the same. Not only had Edda and Tait changed, but Aslaug had also changed. This place had changed, and he had changed. He had so much to learn again.

"Athelstan! You're home!"

Ubbe's little voice broke his gaze from the back of the Great Hall, and he turned to see the boy and his little brother running toward him from the doors. He caught Ubbe just as he jumped into Athelstan's arms, lifting him up to hold him and reaching down for Hvitserk as they both giggled.

"Yes, I'm home," he chuckled. "And I hope you've both been keeping up with your lessons. Surely, your sisters have not let your reading and writing suffer in my absence."

Ubbe scrunched up his little face, pursing his lips as he fidgeted slightly. "Well — "

"I got a new shield for my birthday after you left," Hvitserk exclaimed, "and now that Father's back with you, he can show me how to use it. And I can spar with you just like he does!"

Athelstan laughed softly, taking Hvitserk's hand and pulling him away from where everyone else had congregated. "Well, I must warn you," he said and sat down on a bench close to the hearth. "It has been a year since I held a sword. I might need a bit of practice to get back in the swing of things, so to speak."

Ubbe sighed as he sat on Athelstan's leg, and Hvitserk barely waited, climbing onto Athelstan's free leg and turning his face to him.

"Mother and Lili and Gy-da were lost without you," he proclaimed, to which Athelstan laughed again. "Please do not leave again."

The smile on Athelstan's face faded completely. He looked around, seeing that Ragnar had not come back from the healing hut and Aslaug was still greeting people as they arrived. He glanced behind him, noticing that Lilith had not returned. Then he looked at the boys again, holding them close to him. "I need you both to listen to me very carefully," he whispered. "Please. I did not mean to be away for so long, but it was . . . the will of the gods, and we must never question them. We cannot always know what they have planned for us, and we must be prepared all the same. I have missed you both so much, and we have much catching up to do. And I swear as much as I can that what happened this last year will never happen again. Not by my doing, or by Lili's. Hmm?"

Ubbe pouted, and it was clear that he understood. Athelstan leaned up and kissed his cheek and then his forehead, allowing him to stand on his own and then doing the same to Hvitserk so they both faced him.

"You have both gotten so big," he chuckled. "Soon, you will both be wielding swords and axes of your own, and you will take on the world together. Yes?"

That helped Ubbe's mood improve, and he nodded before his brother did.

"Good," Athelstan nodded, looking up and seeing Þórunn there by herself. He looked at the boys then. "Go find Lili and Edda. You can help them with your little cousin while she's sleeping."

Ubbe took his brother's hand then, pulling him off toward the back, and Athelstan watched them for a minute before he stood to face Þórunn.

"I'm so happy for you," he gushed and moved forward to embrace her. "No one deserves this more than you and Edda. I've missed you, Þórunn," he said as he leaned back to look at her.

The smile on her face widened as she laughed. "I've miss you, dear Athelstan. You are looking well, though it seems you have lost some weight," she said as she looked over his torso and then his waist.

Athelstan smirked slightly. "As everyone keeps observing," he countered. "But I'm well. Despite being no worse for the wear. I'm sure after a few weeks, I'll be back up to normal for you to not worry about me. Lili told me on the way back that you have started training with a sword. You want to be a shieldmaiden?"

She beamed proudly. "I do," she proclaimed. "And I have already learned so much. The swordmaster says I will soon be able to have my own sword. Right now, I am only using a practice sword, in case of mistakes."

"And the more you practice," they both heard and turned to see Lagertha there with an amused expression on her face, "the better you will become, and the more likely you are to make us all proud on the field of battle."

Þórunn blushed even as she stood next to Athelstan, and Lagertha reached behind her, lowering her gaze as she brought forth the one person Athelstan had been waiting to meet since being told about her before they had left England.

"Þórunn, my dear," Lagertha said and held the little girl beside her closer. "Give me a moment alone with Athelstan. Please."

There was no hesitation as she left them by the hearth, and nearly everyone in the Hall disappeared so that Athelstan could only see this little girl and her mother. Lagertha hesitated just a little, easing closer to Athelstan and holding her daughter — their daughter — in front of her.

"Beyla, my love," she said softly and caressed her cheek. "This is your father. I have told you many things about him, yes?"

The little girl lifted her bright blue eyes to Lagertha and nodded before she looked at him again. Athelstan sat down quickly, suddenly nervous the same way he'd been when Lilith had shown their daughter to him. Slowly, Lagertha brought the little girl closer until she was close enough for Athelstan to feel her warmth as she reached out to touch his cheek.

Thick, woody air filled Athelstan's lungs as her little fingers caressed his skin, and every muscle in his body froze.

"Papa," she whispered less than a second before he pulled her into his arms and embraced her as tightly as he could without crushing her.

Her little arms locked around his neck and shoulders, and he brought his hand up to her head, cradling her against him and kissing the side of her head. He remembered Lilith being this small even though he'd been small as well, and he realized that he'd missed so much of this little girl's life.

He leaned back to look at her, easing her golden brown hair from her face and taking in every centimeter of it. "My darling girl," he exhaled and kissed her forehead. "I am so happy to meet you, finally. And I can already see that you are your mother's daughter. I only hope that you will be able to forgive me for missing so much of your life, and I promise I will make it up to you. If it's all right with your mother, whom I care for very much," he said and looked up at Lagertha, adding, "who is also one of my dearest friends."

Lagertha blushed so deeply that she had to look away from him, and when Athelstan reached for her, she wiped a stray tear from her eye before it could fall. He brought her to him gently, waiting until she sat beside him to also kiss her cheek.

"We will make this work, Lagertha," he whispered even as he sighed. "I promise."

She either didn't know what to say or chose not to say anything, bowing her head as her hand came over his that was resting over their daughter's back.

Athelstan lifted his head after a minute, glancing around toward the back of the Hall and spotting Lilith as she watched him with a smile on his face. In that moment, he knew it wasn't only Odin and Thor who smiled on him, as well as Frigg and Freyja for surrounding him with all these women. He knew God had blessed him and made it possible for him to return home where he belonged.

For the rest of the night, and a week after that, Athelstan caught up on everything he'd missed. He held Sigurd and Ivar for the first time and recognized the anguish in Aslaug's eyes over her youngest child's apparent affliction. He stood diligently while Lilith and her step-mother measured him for his new clothes and helped him dress in the newest ones that had been made in his absence. He and Bjorn sparred on the beach early one morning and then later that same day just as the sun was setting, and Lilith and Gyda watched from a distance with the boys and Iðunn. Ragnar took him out of the boat with Tait and Torstein, and he managed to not get knocked over by the rigging.

Lagertha stayed in Kattegat with Beyla while she sent a messenger to Hedeby so they would know she had returned, and a few times, she sat next to Athelstan at supper with their daughter in her lap. He was so curious about this new little life they shared, and he wanted to spend as much time with her as he could, the same way he wanted with Lilith and their daughter. He knew it wouldn't be easy, but that didn't keep him from wanting it.

A few times in their first week home, Lilith took Athelstan to visit Rollo as he recovered in the healing house with Elisef and Siggy watching over him. Two of those times, he was resting, but once, he was awake and apparently not too happy about his current predicament.

"I don't like being useless," he complained as he sat up in the bed with his broken but mending leg hanging off the end of it. "I don't like people waiting on me or looking at me like they pity me. I do not want pity. It is humiliating."

Athelstan sighed as he stood behind Lilith, and she looked up at him from her spot on the bed beside Rollo. She glanced down at his hands, prompting him to speak even if he didn't want to.

"None of us like being at the mercy of others, Rollo," he said, trying to sound sympathetic. "I didn't like it anymore than you do now. But you must recover. Surely you know that."

Rollo huffed, trying to sit up and failing. "When did you ever go through something like this, Priest?" he spat, his face showing more confusion than contempt.

"When they took me down from the cross I had been nailed to by my hands and feet, after I was caught," Athelstan revealed, and the wounded warrior looked at him. With a deep breath, Athelstan nudged Lilith out of the way, replacing her to sit in front of Rollo. He held out his hands, showing the rendered skin over both his palms that had only been truly healed a few months. It was still red like a scar, indented into his skin where the nail had been driven through his flesh.

Rollo was intrigued by the wound, almost cradling Athelstan's hand and looking so closely at it that his nose almost touch his skin. Then he looked up. "They nailed you to a cross," he repeated. Athelstan nodded. Rollo shook his head. "What is a cross?"

Athelstan sighed, looking around the room and finding two stirring spoons that looked the right size. He had to break one of them in half, but when he did, he made the shape of a cross and showed it to Rollo. It took him just a minute to understand, looking at Lilith and trying to sit up again. His leg made it difficult for him to move, and she sat beside him again to help him.

"It's all right, Uncle," she assured him. "We all need help sometimes. Asking for help is a sign of strength."

Rollo huffed again, clenching his teeth as he folded his other ankle under his extended leg. "I can't remember the last time I was hurt this badly," he commented. "How am I to deal with injuries I've never had before if I've never had them?"

"The same way Athelstan did," she said and looked up at him with a smile on her face. "You persevere, as the gods command of us all."

Athelstan smiled with and leaned down to kiss her. "And you allow your family to look after you when you cannot look after yourself," he reiterated.

Rollo seemed to understand, grinning slightly.

A week later, after King Horik had become almost insufferable with spending time with Ragnar and Lagertha about how they would divide up their new land, and after they had celebrated both Gyda's 20th and Hvitserk's 3rd birthdays, the town received two sets of visitors, the first arriving in the form of Helga and her newborn daughter.

Athelstan had missed seeing her as much as he'd missed Gyda and Edda, and he thought she would be happy to see him as well. He quickly learned that she and Floki were already having problems because of the boatbuilder's strange mood swings.

"I know Floki loves me," she said and they sat just outside the Great Hall to stay away from the bustle forming in anticipation of King Horik's family. "I know he loves his daughter. But he is always so troubled. He is always so burdened. I suppose I had foolishly believed that our daughter's birth would bring him round. It seems to have done to exact opposite."

Athelstan sighed as he held Helga's daughter Angrboda in his arms. "I'm sure Floki simply has a lot on his mind right now," he said even as he smiled at the baby girl in his arms. "And I'm sorry I wasn't here to help. I missed so much while I was gone, but I must admit that missing the births of all these children is one of the few things I wished I hadn't missed. Life kept going when I left, and I see no greater proof of that anywhere but here in your daughter's face. She's beautiful, Helga."

Helga smiled and eased closer to lift her hand to the back of her daughter's head. "And she is already so wise," she appraised. "She will be her father's daughter. And she will learn her mother's healing skills." She paused and lifted her gaze to Athelstan. "You should not question your path now, my dear Athelstan. The gods have laid it before you and you alone. There was a reason your journey took you to England, and in that way, there was a reason you experienced those things that happened to you. I am sorry they caused you anguish. I am sorry it caused Lili so much anguish. But now, you are both stronger. Your love is stronger and deeper. And I imagine that love will only grow and deepen as you both grow older together."

Athelstan smiled with her, leaning closer and kissing the side of her face before he kissed her cheek and turned back to her daughter who watched them both carefully. "I suppose in the days and weeks to come, Lili and I will be visiting you both often. If that is what you wish while Floki is so preoccupied."

Helga caressed her daughter's cheek, reaching for her and taking her gently before they both stood up from the small bench. "I think Angrboda would like that very much," she nodded and laughed softly. "As would her mother."

He leaned over the kiss the baby's forehead before he lifted his lips to Helga's to kiss her for the first time in nearly eight years since she had kissed him at Uppsala. He watched her bow her head and then leave, remaining where he stood for long enough for someone else to find him there alone.

"Is everything all right with Helga?"

He turned to see Edda there alone, and he moved into the Great Hall slowly, taking her hand slowly and wrapping his arm around her. "She'll be fine," he said with as much confidence as he could afford. "Floki is being Floki, naturally, so she feels slightly neglected. I'll talk to Lili about going to visit her and the baby soon. There's still so much we have to do in the next few weeks."

Edda sighed as she nodded just once. "Yes," she agreed. "And all of those things have everything to do with a certain King who continues to usurp our Earl's spare time. Even Aslaug is beginning to notice, and she is not happy. Neither is Bjorn, and that means Gyda is out of sorts and so is Lili." She huffed and pursed her lips. "That man destroys everything he touches. I can only hope he leaves soon. Our family cannot handle much more of his presence."

Athelstan sighed loudly, looking around to make sure it was only them talking at the moment. "Well, I know Ragnar," he declared. "And I know how he does things. He's planning something. He hasn't told me of his plans, but he usually doesn't until they're upon us." He paused and turned to face her, wrapping her arms around him and then clasping his hands together at the small of her back. "You and I will simply have to work especially hard to keep Lili happy and unburdened, hmm?"

She laughed then, nodding and lifting her hands to his arms, grasping onto him as he lifted his lips to her temple.

The next day, in the early evening, they received their second guests, in the form of King Horik's entire family. The man's wife had the stature of a warrior, much like Lagertha, even as she dressed in her fine clothes and intricately braided hair. Aside from Erlendur, Horik apparently had three sons who were younger than him and five daughters. They were all happy children who probably had no idea of the carnage their father had caused, and it didn't look like they cared. To them, he was probably the most heroic king they had ever known.

It was so sad.

Beyla found him while they were waiting for Ragnar to come back with Aslaug and King Horik, and Athelstan held her up in his arm as he stood next to Lilith, who held Iðunn in her arms.

"I am hungry," she proclaimed, grasping onto his shoulders.

Athelstan looked over at Lagertha as she stood on the other side of the hearth. "Well, we'll get you something to eat soon, my darling girl," he said and held her closer to him. "Sometimes, we have to fulfill our obligations before we can satisfy our own needs and desires. Even to men we do not believe deserve it."

She sighed as she held onto him, and he sighed with her, lifting his lips to kiss her cheek and under her jaw.

When King Horik finally arrived with his children, he paraded them up in front of everyone gathered in the Great Hall. Ragnar and Aslaug remained on the floor below the platform, and it was clear by his body language that King Horik took pleasure in standing above everyone else. He was King and everyone else was beneath him, even his allies.

Athelstan listened to the king speak only because he had to. He stood among these people he now considered his own people and allowed the king to make his speech and make grand gestures because he knew was improper to not be present. But he couldn't keep from rolling his eyes at every word, glancing at Lilith to see her doing the same thing. He couldn't keep from hearing the double meanings in King Horik's words, and it made him all the more anxious to know what Ragnar was planning to do when he dealt with the king. It was going to be something irreversible. Athelstan knew that much.

The people in the Hall cheered when King Horik finished, and as everyone dispersed, Lilith turned to Athelstan with an indifferent look in her eyes.

"I'm going to go lay her down in the back rooms," she said and leaned up to kiss him gently. "I suddenly don't feel like celebrating."

He wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed her a little longer. "The feeling is mutual, my love," he whispered. "You go on then. I'll get Beyla something to eat, and then we might join you."

She smiled slightly, kissing his cheek and then kissing Beyla's cheek before she turned and left him there, moving through the people gathered to get to the back of the Hall where it was obviously quiet.

Athelstan waited until she was gone to look at Beyla, hoisting her up further and allowing her to wrap her legs around him. "Now, my darling girl, what would you like to eat? You may have anything you wish," he declared, adding, "as long as it is not something we both know will keep you awake all night."

The little girl in his arms laughed a little louder, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and pointing to the tables where all the food was being kept. He didn't hesitate, moving through the crowd to reach their destination. A few people stared at him as he held her, but he paid them little, if any attention. The only person he cared about in that moment was the little one in his arms at that precise moment.

Beyla wanted to eat far more sweet bread than it seemed possible, and though Athelstan was reluctant to let her eat it, he allowed her to take a few more bites than usual while also getting himself a cup of ale to take with him to the back rooms. A few of the smaller children running around without their parents tried to persuade Beyla from his arms a couple of times, but she refused their pleas, remaining close to him even as the noise became almost intolerable.

Athelstan turned from the festivities then, meaning to retire in the back rooms where he knew Lilith was still sitting, when Floki stopped him in the middle of the Hall.

"Why did you come back here, Priest?" he demanded, half-hissing. "Nobody wants you here. You betrayed the gods! You betrayed all of us. It's your fault Rollo's going to die!"

Astonishment filled Athelstan before he could react, and his hold on Beyla tightened so there was no space left between her little body and his. He'd gone almost three weeks without anyone confronting him this way, and of course it would Floki to do it. Of course, Floki wouldn't be able to leave him alone. Of course.

"Papa," Beyla whispered softly, her little hands holding his shoulder protectively.

Her little voice snapped him out of his dumbfounded state, and he looked at her, staring for just a few seconds before he spoke.

"I know you don't want me here, Floki," Athelstan said, watching the amusement in the boatbuilder's eyes change to fury. "But there are more people here who do. My wife, for instance, and our daughter. And this little girl in my arms now. Honestly, I don't know what I did for you to be so confrontational, but it doesn't matter to me. I have everything I need here. Your words mean nothing to me now."

He didn't wait for Floki to respond, holding Beyla a little higher on his arm and leaving the main gathering hall without another word. He made it all the way into the back rooms, behind the first partition before he stopped and took a deep breath. He had expected some kind of reaction from people to him returning, but their reactions were expected. Floki's behavior just didn't make sense anymore.

The back rooms of the Great Hall were, in fact, blessedly quiet and peaceful when Athelstan found his way to where Lilith had put their daughter down in a crib next to the bed where she had slept while he'd been away from her. Before he joined her in the bed, Athelstan lay Beyla in the small bed next to the crib, allowing her to keep the bread in her hand before he climbed into the bed to lay in front of his obviously exasperated wife.

"What would you say," he whispered and held her face between his hands, "if I told you we could all go back to our house and sleep in our bed tonight, without anyone disturbing us at least until morning?"

She laughed softly, wrapping her hands around his forearms. "I would say you are a miracle worker, and your days as a monk were wasted on you," she whispered, and he laughed with her, leaning closer to kiss her. She eased closer to him, aligning her body to his and releasing his arms as he lifted his lips to her forehead.

"Then I am your miracle worker," he promised her, folding his arms around her so she fit against him like she always did. "And I will do everything is my power to make it possible. Right now, rest. Nothing out there matters to us."

Lilith relaxed in his arms, and Athelstan breathed in as deep as he could, wanting nothing more than to forget what Floki had said and what Horik had done and what Ragnar would do in the future. And yet, it lingered for far longer than he wished.

Less than an hour passed as the feasting went on outside, and though they were both tired from the day's activities, they were both awake when Edda found them while she was putting away linens from the laundry room. Athelstan heard her before he saw her, glancing back to see her folding up the linens before she knelt onto the bed behind him. He smiled when she leaned over him to greet Lilith, and then he laughed when she leaned back to look at him.

"You both look comfortable," she said and sighed. "If not both tired as well. Might I guess it was Floki who caused this?"

Athelstan sighed with her, still holding Lilith close to him. "And King Horik. And all those people out there who still look at me like I don't belong here. I would sooner disappear than be forced to mingle with these people. I only do it for Ragnar."

Edda didn't reply to his words, laying down behind him and wrapping her arms around him. "None of those people matter," she whispered against his shoulder. "One day, they won't have anything to say about you or Lili or me, and we'll all be happier. I know the children will be happier, for certain. Perhaps Gyda can come with us, though I'm not so sure about Gunnar."

Athelstan laughed softly, reaching back for her and turning his head to kiss her cheek when she offered it. "I'm fairly certain that Gyda's father would have something to say about that," he countered even as he smiled.

"Oh, and her brother as well," Edda said and giggled softly.

Lilith rose up to prop her head on her hand then, clearing her throat as they both looked at her. "Would the two of you like for me to leave?" she teased. "I don't really need to be here, do I?"

"Lili, no," he said quickly and lifted his hands to her face. "I will always need you here. It is a promise I have never broken. And whenever I am here with you and Edda and our daughter, I am complete. That will never change."

Lilith laughed like he had, holding onto his forearms again and leaning in to kiss him before she sat up over the bed. "Let us all go home," she said, scooting off the bed. "I don't think my father will mind much, since he's now more than likely drunk by now and will not notice."

Athelstan didn't hesitate, nudging Edda away and then waiting for her to stand before he quickly moved to the bed where he'd laid Beyla, surprised to find her asleep as he lifted her in his arms.

Lilith gathered up Iðunn, wrapping her in a thick blanket and waiting for the two of them before she lead the way out of the back room and then the back of the Great Hall that led around to their house on other side of the stream that flowed through town. Athelstan followed his wife without question, pulling Edda behind him and glancing back to see a smile on her face as she did so. He smiled then as well, bringing her up to his side and pressing his lips to her temple as they walked behind Lilith. She wrapped her arms around him, sharing him with Beyla as they walked until they were inside the quiet confines of their house where the hearth burned with embers.

Athelstan quickly added more wood to the hearth, allowing Lilith and Edda to take the children into the back room while he removed the belt around his waist that held his ax. He also removed the overcoat he'd been wearing between his house and the Great Hall. By the time he stepped into the bed room, Edda was helping Beyla out of her dress and into a sleeping gown, and Lilith was wrapping Iðunn in clean dressings for the night. He stopped by the door frame and watched them, wondering how much fuller his life would get before it became too much. Maybe that day would never come. He honestly hoped it never did.

"Do not tell me, dear husband," Lili said and looked back at him, "that you are going to be one of those men who likes to watch, because if I have anything to say about it, you will not simply watch. You will be next to us when that happens."

His furrowed brow must have given away his confusion, because she laughed softly and then crossed the room to his side, taking his hand to pull him into the room.

"Edda says many men in town are this way," she continued, unfastening the belt around his waist and then pulling his tunic up over his head to take it off. "But do not worry, my love. You are tired, and I am tired, and tonight we will sleep. Edda is only here to help ensure that. Anything that happens after that will only occur when none of us is tired. Hmm?"

Athelstan blushed and then laughed, kissing her and trusting her as she sat him on the bed to pull off his boots and then stood up in front of him to untie the back of her own dress. She stripped it off to be in her slip dress that became translucent in the candlelight of the bedroom, and instead of joining him like she usually would have, she nodded for him to get into bed as she moved around to help Edda get ready for bed.

They slipped under than furs on the bed together, with Lilith in the middle as she huddled close to him and brought Edda close to her. It took a minute for them all to get settled, but once it was quiet, one thing pricked the back of Athelstan's thoughts, and he spoke softly.

"Edda, how do you know that many men in town like to watch other people make love?" he asked, not completely understanding even if he wasn't totally innocent anymore.

"How do you think, Athelstan?" she asked pointedly.

It took him another minute to realize her meaning, and instantly, he remembered his first night in the farmhouse with Ragnar and Lagertha. He remembered them propositioning him and teasing him, and he remembered them leaving him alone. The longer he thought about it, the more he recalled that it hadn't only been them. Over the course of the last eight years, every now and then, he'd seem people look at him strangely. He'd been a slave, so their gaze had not been uncommon. But now, he realized why they'd been looking at him that way. They had wanted to do that same thing Ragnar and Lagertha had wanted to do.

And of course Edda had experienced the same.

Athelstan had been able to avoid it all these years, with the exception of Lagertha, but Edda had been given no such consideration.

He didn't know what to say, holding Lilith closer to him and somehow managing to reach under her for Edda and feeling relieved when she allowed it. From that moment on, he swore to only touch her when she wanted him to.

Both Lilith and Edda fell asleep long before he did, but Athelstan stayed awake, thinking about how different it would have been if he'd never left in the first place. He kept thinking about it even if he knew it would do him no good, and he resolved that the next time Ragnar wanted to go anywhere or do anything, either he and Lilith would stay in Kattegat or they would go with Ragnar together. Athelstan would never allow him and Lilith to be separated ever again. God might have been cruel that way, but he wasn't.

By morning, Lilith had turned her back to his chest with his arms around her securely and after having the shortest, deepest sleep he'd had since they returned to Kattegat, Athelstan woke to find her and Edda holding each other like he was sure they had while he'd been away. Only a few minutes passed before Lilith woke to see him there, and she smiled, lifting her hand to his cheek.

"Good morning, husband," she whispered.

He leaned down to kiss her, easing his hand from her waist to her hip, and he began pulling her gown up to uncover her from him just as loud knock reverberated through the small house followed by an equally loud voice.

"You better get your ass out here, Brother," Bjorn shouted. "Or I'm coming in there after you. And I don't care what state of undress you might be in, with those women of yours."

Athelstan sighed loudly, annoyed even if only for a moment as Lilith turned his face to hers and kissed him again.

"Go bond with your brother-in-law," she half-commanded, adding, "at least he's nicer than the last ones you had."

He smirked at her and kissed her as Bjorn knocked on the door again.

"Athelstan! Two minutes, or I'm coming in."

At that moment, Iðunn woke with a soft cry and then a loud whine, and Athelstan hurried from his bed to hers, lifting her in his arms to soothe her. He crossed the room and lay her in her mother's arms, kissing them both before he also kissed Edda's cheek and then proceeded to get dressed.

He still only had the old shirt of Ragnar's and his overcoat, so he pulled those on along with his boots and his belt, glancing at Lilith and Edda and his daughters one last time before he opened the door just as Bjorn was about to knock again.

"There are sleeping children in this house now, Brother," he remarked as he shut the door to his house.

Bjorn sighed and draped his arm around Athelstan's shoulders. "And I will apologize to my sisters later. Come with me," he commanded and pulled him off toward town. "It is time for you to bond with us men now, and I will not take no for an answer."

Of course Athelstan didn't argue. But he thought about Lilith and Edda, Beyla and Iðunn the entire time. They were his life now, after all. He knew nothing else would command his attention so much anymore.

Bonding with the men turned out to be playing games, and one in particular that was apparently supposed to gauge their aim and trajectory skills by tossing a coin into a bucket. Athelstan had never seen anything so silly, but when Ragnar tossed a coin and missed, and then Torstein tossed a coin and missed, and then Erlendur tossed a coin and missed, Athelstan realized it was a game to see who was better. How could he not participate?

Floki, of course, tossed a coin and got it into the bucket, dancing with joy at his victory, and he dared them all to do better with just a look. Bjorn went after him and missed, and finally, it was Athelstan's turn.

Though he'd never done anything like this before, Athelstan knew what everyone else was doing wrong, and he compensated, under-tossing his coin and watching as it sailed through the air to reach its destination, only for Floki to catch it mid-air before it had a chance to land. Athelstan wasn't surprised, but he was confused. Why take away the chance to participate and be like them? Hadn't that been his argument since the year before? Why couldn't he just let this whole thing go?

Torstein was surprised, and he made sure everyone around them heard him when he shouted, "That's cheating!"

Floki was just as happy with himself at preventing Athelstan's coin from going in the bucket as he had been when his own had gone in, and it was obvious why. He didn't want Athelstan to experience any joy around him, and he was doing a very good job of it.

Bjorn sighed as he nudged Athelstan on away from the rest of the men. "Do not worry about Floki," he said and again draped his arm around Athelstan's shoulders. "He is just being Floki."

Athelstan sighed and bowed his head. "I know," he nodded. "I just thought it would get easier after so long. But it only seems to keep getting worse. Was he like this while I was gone?"

"Not like this," he commented. "But he and Ragnar had quite a few arguments where King Horik was concerned, especially right before he married Helga. I don't know what's going on between them, but I know it will not end well. They have been friends a long time. Perhaps it is just time."

"Time for what?" Athelstan asked and looked up at him.

Bjorn shrugged. "For them to go their separate ways. I've seen it happen, but this time, it makes me much more sorrowful than I thought it would."

Athelstan inhaled deeper than before and took another sip of his ale. It was quiet a minute before he spoke again. "Bjorn, what do you know about the women slaves? About their lives here in town?"

Bjorn frowned. "What do you mean?" he asked.

After a pause, Athelstan took another deep breath and spoke. "Last night, Lili said Edda told her that many of the men in town liked to watch her have sex? Is that true? And does it happen to all the slave women?"

For a minute, Bjorn said nothing, walking and drinking until they made it to the Great Hall and sat down at a vacant table. "From what I have heard, it is the way of life for all slaves. Not just the women. They are property until they are freed, and their masters can do with them what they wish. My mother and father did not treat you that way because you did not wish it, and they had to trust you with our care when they left. Not all masters are so generous."

"So it's true," Athelstan affirmed with a heavy sigh. "And before she was freed by Aslaug, Edda had to endure men looking at her and watching her and taking her without her permission. Because she was a slave. And Þórunn — Was it the same for her?"

Bjorn's long face became even longer as he sat there, and he took a long swig of his ale before slamming the cup down on the table. "It continues to shackle her even now that she has been given her freedom and may choose any life she wishes to have," he growled, though his anger wasn't directed at Athelstan. Then he looked up and spoke. "Every time I try to get through to her that I will not be like those men, she refuses to believe me. I am at a loss as to what to say to her."

Athelstan emptied his cup and leaned closer to his brother-in-law. "Then you shouldn't be here talking to me, Brother," he said and grinned. "You should be finding her and talking to her. I saw how you both looked at each other when we returned from England. If you wait too long, you might lose your chance."

It took a minute for Bjorn to understand what he was saying, and he took one last gulp of ale before he stood up and left, clapping Athelstan on the back as he walked away.

"Well, you certainly lit a fire under his ass," he heard and turned to see Gyda coming closer to him. She sat beside him with her own cup, nudging him playfully. "Good morning, Brother. You look like you had a good night's sleep."

She wagged her eyebrows at him, causing him to blush and bow his head. When he didn't say anything back, she leaned in closer.

"How was it?" she whispered. "I have always wanted to know, and Lili is still so secretive about her sex life."

Athelstan laughed softly. "Nothing like that happened," he nearly exclaimed. "Lili and I were exhausted last night, and we all went straight to bed. Edda was only there to ensure it. Does everyone think that now that she's living with us?"

Gyda pouted slightly. "I do not know about everyone," she shrugged. "But I know you have two beautiful young women living with you, and it would not be uncommon for people to think it now. And it should not bother you. The gods smile on you, dear Brother. And I'm sure your God is smiling on you as well. When you were away, my sister and I prayed to Him because you were closer to Him. And it worked. So perhaps we should continue to do so for your happiness and well-being. And for lots more children," she teased next to his ear and caused him to shiver slightly.

The blush in his cheeks let her know that she had sufficiently embarrassed him, and she cupped his cheek gently, leaning forward to kiss the side of his face.

"After all these years living amongst us, you would think you had lost that bit of innocence that you have somehow managed to retain," she marveled. "You are amazing, my dear Brother. Now go find your wife before my father finds you for another one of his talks that will surely last into the night as they always do."

Athelstan didn't need to be told twice, kissing her cheek and rising from the table so he could get away from the Great Hall before anyone else found him.

The people in the streets didn't stare at him as badly now as they had when he'd come back a few weeks earlier, but he still noticed a few of them glaring at him or otherwise appearing indifferent to him. The idea of leaving this place with Lilith and their children grew a little larger in his mind then, even if he knew it wasn't something he wanted to entertain as of yet.

When Athelstan returned to his house, he discovered Lilith there alone, and he actually looked around the front room for Edda and the girls before she spoke with her back to him.

"Edda has taken them to the long house to visit with my sister and my mother and step-mother," she said without waiting for him to say anything to her. "With everything that's happened, I wanted them all to spend some time together."

Athelstan stepped up behind his wife, looking over her shoulder as she cut up a piece of fruit and deposited it into a small bowl. "And when will they be back?" he asked, wrapping his arm around her and kissing the spot behind her ear.

"Tomorrow," she informed him as she finished with her cutting and put the knife away.

He pulled her closer to him until her body was pressed to his. "What about our daughter? You're still nursing her," he whispered against the shell of her ear.

"Edda will know what to do," she assured him. "And I'm certain Asa will also know what to do. I wanted," she said and looked at him finally, "just this once for it to be you and me. Before it is the three of us."

Athelstan leaned in to kiss her, keeping her back to him as he pulled the hem of her dress up and slipped his hand over her hip and then her belly. She wanted it to be just the two of them right now, and he was happy to oblige her.

From the front room where most of his clothes came off to the bedroom where the rest of hers fell to the floor, they made love all day, only leaving the bed to find food and then drink, and Athelstan had never been so content to stay in bed. Lilith showed him this way to touch her that Edda had shown her, and they spent a good few hours perfecting it. When they ended up over the foot of the bed, Athelstan still kept her in his arms, knowing it was the only place she was safe. He knew it was the only place she would ever be safe.

It was late afternoon before she sat up and then over him, holding him to the bed by his arms. She smiled down at him, and he smiled up at her, noticing for the first time in a long time how she glowed even in the low light of their bedroom. The first time he'd noticed it, he hadn't been able to explain it then, and he still couldn't explain it now. But he knew that was when he really began to fall in love with her.

"You really are getting older," she teased, hooking her ankles over his shins to keep him pressed to the bed. "Maybe you should begin your training again soon. We must get your strength and stamina back up where it should be."

Athelstan laughed and blushed again, slipping his hands into hers and pulling her closer to him. "I fear my ax-throwing and sword-wielding days might be behind me," he lamented even as he kissed her.

She pouted, still kissing him. "And why is that, my love?"

He brought his hands between them, allowing her to see the scars that still marred his skin, and she leaned closer, kissing the back of each his hands. "I'm only just healing," he reminded her. "I can still only barely hold a quill, let alone an ax or a sword. And I can feel myself struggling to hold my daughter's hand every now and then. I don't want to injure myself again, especially if it means I wouldn't be able to hold her or you, or even Beyla."

Lilith turned his palms to her lips, kissing each of them and then sliding her fingers between his to lay them above his head. "Then we will just have to practice like you did in Wessex," she decided. "Like when we practiced as children, and when you had me practice in the monastery. And then you will not have to worry about hurting yourself."

He laughed softly, leaning up to kiss her and beginning their dance again as he rolled her onto her back and wrapped her legs around him. She folded her arms around the back of his neck and shoulders, tilting her head back as he eased his lips and tongue down her neck and then her chest before he moved lower to further explore her skin as he'd done in the month of their honeymoon and virtually every other time they'd made love.

It was well after dark before Lilith left bed to make them a proper meal, and it was only because she was hungry. Athelstan watched her from the bed, marveled by her and amazed by her more than he ever had been in his life. Everything about her amazed him, and he knew nothing else would ever feel like this again. If he didn't know any better, he would call it divine.

"I suppose I will simply have to feed you more until you are back to full strength," she still teased as she brought two bowls of food to the bed and sat down in front of him. "Lagertha did the same thing for Ragnar after he was injured by Earl Haraldson and then when we moved into the long house and the Great Hall. It is, after all, my responsibility to take care of you when you are sick."

Athelstan sighed as he ate, drinking a little of his ale and staying quiet as he sat in front of her. Every now and then, she mentioned the vows they'd taken in the woods, the ones that required her to obey him and always be faithful to him. He remembered Judith taking her vows to Aethelwulf, and he knew why Lilith's had been different. They were different because he had not made her swear her obedience and fidelity to him the way Bishop Edmund had done to Judith, and it bothered him that she still believed these things.

"Do you think we should go to breakfast in the long house tomorrow?" she asked after a minute of silence.

Athelstan grinned over his food. "If that is what you want," he replied.

She grinned as well, eating silently as the decision was made.

After the food was gone and they returned to bed, Athelstan held Lilith as close to him as he always had, caressing the scars along her back to her waist and then over her arms to her hand and then taking it in his. She shivered against him, sighing contentedly and laying her forehead against his.

"I want this for the rest of my life," she whispered close to his lips.

Athelstan lifted his lips to the bridge of her nose and then her brow, feeling her fall asleep and relaxing enough to fall asleep with her. As long as he could do this every night, it didn't matter what her reasons were. With time, it would simply become what they did, despite everyone else.

The next morning, after breakfast and after Athelstan left Lilith with her sister and the other women to mend some of the older clothes, he went out into town by himself for the first time since coming back a few weeks earlier. He knew a few people still didn't like that he'd returned, but only a few of them made their opinions known by leaving any of the places where he stopped. He figured it would continue happening until he left with Lilith and their children, and he was sure now that they would leave, one day for good.

He found his way to the market place, thinking he would find materials to make a new journal when he saw Bjorn storming off through the middle of the blacksmith's hut with an angry furrow in his brow. Instead of stopping by the leathersmith, Athelstan followed his brother-in-law until they were walking to the beach and then the first docks of the town. Bjorn glanced back when he heard Athelstan behind him, huffing as he stopped and turned around.

"Nothing is wrong, Athelstan," he shouted, shaking his head and waving him off. "I do not need to talk."

"You don't have the look of someone who doesn't need to talk," Athelstan argued. "We're family, Bjorn. Perhaps I can help."

His brother-in-law huffed and folded his arms petulantly, leaning against one of the dock posts as he faced the fjord. "It is my fault," he growled. "I will deal with it."

Though Bjorn looked much angrier than he had, Athelstan knew this look in his eyes, and he could only guess as to what had happened.

"Lili also told me that you have been having trouble relating to Þórunn," he said, and Bjorn huffed again. "I went through something similar with them both. When Þórunn was just thirteen, she and I nearly got off on the wrong foot because she thought I was trying to get her into trouble by helping me. It took us a few weeks, but we finally got to be friends. And now she is like family."

Bjorn sighed softly, glancing back at him. "And my sister? When were you and she not able to relate to each other?"

"When I realized that I was in love with her," Athelstan said, watching Bjorn turn his head and then face him. Athelstan stepped closer and lowered his voice. "And it took us a few days to realize how we felt for each other."

Bjorn huffed. "I don't know what to say to make her understand," he complained. "I have tried more times than I can count, and I am frustrated by all of Odin!"

Athelstan laughed softly, prompting Bjorn to look at him. "Lili and I were both feeling the same things at the same time, and I didn't handle it well. I almost ruined all of it because I got jealous for some stupid reason. If it hadn't been for Helga, we might not have gotten married, and we wouldn't have our daughter."

Bjorn sighed softly. "And of course you both worked it all out," he deduced. "My niece is evidence enough of that. But I don't think Helga will be able to help me in this case."

"Then let me help you," Athelstan pleaded. "It's what I'm supposed to do. I know it's what my older brothers would have done."

A small smile appeared on Bjorn's face, and he nodded toward his father's boat, moving off the docks and waiting for Athelstan to follow him before he spoke again. "The women in our lives certainly have had us all turned around, no?"

Athelstan laughed and nodded. "They have," he agreed. "And believe me, I asked myself many times over the last year if it was worth it. Lili and I had been separated before, but my return to her had always been assured. In the last year, I despaired so many times that I might not ever see her again. It was painful. More painful than anything else ever had been."

"What helped?" Bjorn asked, stepping up to the bow of the boat that looked out into the fjord.

Athelstan climbed up next to him, grasping onto the rigging rope to keep from falling into the water. "I had a friend who listened to me and didn't judge me when I began to lose hope," he revealed, thinking of Margaret and hoping she was all right. He paused, and after a minute, Bjorn looked at him. "If you care for her, Bjorn, give her the time she needs to know she feels the same way. If she does, then it should be easy to give."

"I love her," Bjorn insisted. "And I know she loves me. But getting her freedom has changed things. She wants choices, and what if one of those choices is not me?"

Athelstan leaned in closer. "And what if she has already chosen you?" he countered. "What if the choices she has to make have nothing to do with you and everything to do with her? She has been a slave all her life, and now, all of a sudden, she can do whatever she wants to do. She's adjusting, and once she settles in, her life will be clearer to her. Give her time, Bjorn. She deserves that much and more."

It took a minute for Bjorn to acknowledge that he was right, and he nodded, still standing at the bow of the ship and watching the midday sun creep its way along a blue sky quickly filling with storm clouds.

The next day, and for the next several days, the rains that swept over the fjord and the mountains kept them all in doors. Thankfully, Athelstan and Lilith had been visiting with Aslaug and the boys when it began raining, so they were able to stay in their old room while they waited for the rain to let up. Most of the time, Lilith stayed with her sister and Edda at the loom, helping to mend and make clothes, and a couple of times, she had him try on a couple of shirts and pants she had made for him. When he wasn't doing that, Athelstan was sitting around the hearth with Ragnar and Torstein and Bjorn, enjoying the fact that King Horik had elected to stay in the house he'd been given for the duration of his stay.

"That man is utterly confusing to me," Torstein commented as he drank his ale. "He talks of alliances and family and pledges, and he stays in his little house instead of here, where people he claims are his friends spend their time. What kind of man does that?"

"A king, my friend," Athelstan offered. "In my experience, they do whatever they want however they want, and it doesn't matter if you're a friend or a foe. I'm simply taking this as an opportunity to get reacquainted with my own friends. We haven't talk a lot since I got back, Torstein. How has life been treating you? Other than you claiming fair maidens and turning drinking into an art."

His happy friend laughed loudly, taking a longer swig of his ale. "Oh, you know me, Priest," he chuckled. "If there's a lady out there who needs a good man, I'm there for her. And my Earl has been keeping me busy with the security in town. Along with Arvid, who he's had patrolling around the perimeter to keep you and Lili safe. With King Horik still in town, he is taking no chances."

Athelstan grinned even as he glanced at Ragnar and then looked behind him to find Arvid there, standing guard by the doors. "Well, we all need to stay vigilant," he concurred, drinking his own ale and turning back to Torstein as the older man looked at his hand. Athelstan sighed softly, knowing he would have to talk about it even if he didn't want to.

"Is it really on both your hands and feet?" he asks about Athelstan's scars.

"Yes," he said and put down his ale, turning his palms over so Torstein could see.

A few minutes passed as Torstein looked over the scars, probably wondering what had done it and how long it had taken Athelstan to heal from it. When he finished, he took one of Athelstan's hands in his and lay his other hand over the back of it.

"I always knew you were strong, Priest," he praised. "This only proves it further. Now I know you are truly blessed by the gods. One day soon, they will give you a son to be proud of, since I can already see how proud you are of your daughter."

Athelstan laughed with him, laying his other hand over Torstein's, and they laughed together as Torstein wagged his eyebrows the same way Gyda had, indicating he knew what she knew. Athelstan tried not to be annoyed, allowing Torstein to let go before he did.

When the rain finally let up and people who had been staying in the Great Hall left to go back to their own homes, King Horik finally showed up, declaring he wished to talk about his plans for the next summer. Ragnar stipulated that he wanted his eldest children present, and he insisted that Athelstan was a part of his family now and had earned a place beside him. The king made no objections, but from the moment they all sat down in the private back rooms of the Hall, he clearly had no intention of listening to anything Athelstan had to say.

"We should not wait too long to return to Wessex," Athelstan said as he sat between Lilith and Bjorn across the table from King Horik and Erlendur. "While I do not believe King Ecbert to be an impatient man, he does not take too lightly on people who do not keep up their end of a bargain. I know we need to resupply and repair the boats. In the Spring or Summer, we should return, but no later."

The indifferent expression on King Horik face did not change as he turned his gaze to Bjorn and then Ragnar.

"And if that is what Earl Ragnar decides, then I will agree — with him. What about you, Bjorn? What do you think?"

He glanced at Athelstan, smirking as he spoke. "Next summer, I say we should return to Wessex and claim the land from King Ecbert. Those who wish to farm should do so and divide the land between them. I agree with my brother. King Ecbert seems to be reasonable. We should not have him wait for us to make a decision. Surely, you agree, King Horik."

"And what should the rest of us do?" King Horik half demanded. "Those of us who do not wish to be farmers?"

Bjorn sat up a little straighter. "Those can join King Ecbert and Princess Kwentrith in the battle for Mercia. I know there will be many of them. I'm sure they will be rewarded well."

He shrugged. "Well, I do agree with you concerning the land. I think we should claim it as soon as possible." Then he looked at Ragnar again. "But I do not like the idea of being Ecbert's handmaiden. I still have a score to settle with him, and unlike you and Ragnar and . . . the Priest, I do not trust him."

Athelstan clenched his fist without meaning to, and Lilith lay her hand over his, reminding him to stay calm. He looked at Bjorn, noticing the slightly annoyed look on his face and feeling relieved that it wasn't just him who felt insulted.

Horik barely noticed this, nibbling on the food in front of him as he continued with his anecdote. "He reminds me of the giantess Hel," he began. "You should remember this story. Her face, her neck, her breast, all pink, but beneath her waist, every inch of her flesh was decayed and rotten and greenish black. She reminds us to duality of people, how on the surface they can seem good and fair, but underneath, they can be jealous and rotten. And they can trick us."

Erlendur, after having not spoken through their entire conversation, chose that moment to speak up. "Yes, that might be true, Father," he agreed. "But wouldn't be best to test him, to see if he is being honest?"

"Ecbert has given us no reason not to trust him," Athelstan interjected, drawing Horik's murderous gaze in his and Lilith's direction. "He released Rollo to us, and he gave us land to settle on. Why do those things if he means to double-cross us? I believe he is telling us the truth, and I believe we should trust him."

"Surely, Athelstan," Lagertha began, "you do not think we should not be cautious. Even under the best circumstances, a new friend can still be untrustworthy. You should know that better than any of us. The experiences you've had while in Wessex and with King Horik have made you more cautious, not less. Surely."

He shook his head once. "I did not say we should not be cautious," he amended. "But if we begin this relationship with him suspicious of everything he does, then he will have no reason to welcome us when we return. I do want to be cautious, Lagertha. But I also don't wish to be blinded by it."

She grinned slightly, raising her cup a little as King Horik spoke again.

"But do you agree with me?" he asked. "Ecbert should not be trusted."

Lagertha shrugged just a little. "We do not know him or his intentions," she said and looked at Bjorn and then Athelstan. "But I do think we should claim the land. It is an immense opportunity, and we should not squander it. Those who wish to farm should do so and also ask for King Ecbert's protection. But for some of us, those who wish to raid, we will go elsewhere. We will explore and discover new places."

In the same manner that he'd been outvoted during the talks with Ecbert, King Horik shook his head, still nibbling on his food and drinking his ale. Athelstan watched him the same way he had in Wessex, sensing something about his demeanor and his words that made it difficult to know what he was thinking even if by then it should have been obvious what he was planning to do.

Edda came and saved Athelstan and Lilith from one more moment with King Horik and his son, informing them that it was time for Iðunn to have her midmorning feeding and guiding them to where Asa was sitting with her and Beyla. Athelstan had never been more glad to sit and watch Lilith nurse their daughter. It was better than watching King Horik suck the life out of him and the rest of his family.

He really did want to destroy everything he touched.

Just as Lilith finished with their daughter, Ragnar stepped into the little alcove they had disappeared to, sitting with Athelstan as he spoke.

"I wanted to make for certain that King Horik did not upset either of you with his words," he told them even as he watched them.

Athelstan sighed softly. "Nothing that man says will ever upset me anymore," he scoffed. "He never thinks of anyone but himself, and I have other people in my life who need my attention. He's planning something, Ragnar. I know it."

Ragnar sighed, sitting back and beckoning Beyla to his lap. "Yes, I know it as well. But he is the king. I can do nothing to move against him. For now, we must live our lives without his interference. I won't have him disrupting our family, and that now includes you, my friend."

The little alcove became quiet outside of Iðunn's garbling, and a small smile spread across Ragnar's face.

"How is my granddaughter today?" he asked as brightly as ever.

Lilith smiled as she rubbed her daughter's back. "She is well, Father. She is happy to have her father in her life. I can tell already. Already, being in Athelstan's arms soothes her, just as it always soothed me as a babe. And she is strong. How is my littlest brother? How is Ivar?"

The smile on his face fell a little. "He is healthy," he said softly. "His mother is very protective of him. She worries for him, as I knew she would when he was born. I hope she will not make his life more difficult."

Lilith frowned, glancing at Athelstan before she spoke again. "And why would she do that? She is his mother. Protecting him and worrying for him comes with the job."

"Yes," Ragnar said and bowed his head. "But this is different. As I knew it would be. And I hope she realizes this soon. She has three other sons who need her as much."

"Father," she said and stood up to move to his side, "you should not worry. My step-mother knows what her responsibility is, and she loves her sons. We simply need to give her time to adjust. We all need time to adjust."

Instead of replying, he wrapped his arm around her to hold her against him as he released Beyla to her own father. Athelstan lifted his eldest to his lap and held her against him, realizing that by doing so, he and Ragnar finally had more in common than anyone else. They now both had two daughters by two different women but whom they loved both very dearly.

After Iðunn finished her own meal, Lilith wanted to visit Rollo again, but he was sleeping, so she decided they should go for a walk before supper. Athelstan thought she might want to talk about what King Horik had said about Ecbert or returned to Wessex, but to his surprise, she only wished for them to spend time together as a family. So that's what they did. He held Beyla up on his shoulders while she carried their daughter, and for a few hours, a few blessedly quiet hours, it was just the four of them. Nothing had ever been so peaceful, and he knew based on every look he'd seen on Ragnar's face since they'd come home that it wouldn't be this way ever again.

Supper was another loud affair with all the tables in the Great Hall lined up and food served at every table while everyone in town who could manage it sat down to eat. Lilith reluctantly relinquished Iðunn to Asa for the night, allowing her to take their daughter and Beyla to the back where it would be quiet while she and Athelstan sat with Ragnar and Aslaug.

"Try not to worry about her too much," Aslaug said as they all sat together. "Asa has been caring for you all since before I was here, and she will come if something happens."

Lilith sighed as she sat between her step-mother and Athelstan, and he took her hand in his so she would look at him. He kissed her forehead gently and whispered close to her ear.

"Ragnar needs us right now," he reminded her. "Our daughter is in safe hands, and we can't let King Horik believe otherwise. Hmm?"

She looked up then, and Athelstan followed her gaze to discover King Horik and his wife Gunhild sitting across from them and staring at them.

"My wife is a new mother, Queen Gunhild," Athelstan said, feigning ignorance to their gaze. "Surely, you remember what that is like."

The older woman smiled warmly and nodded. "I can. And I have heard so much about her. Earl Ragnar's daughter Gyda has told me many wonderful things about you both. It seems the gods have blessed you both."

It took every ounce of strength Athelstan had not to retort in King Horik's face that his wife was obviously nicer than he was.

Lagertha leaned over Athelstan's shoulder then, drawing his attention to her as she spoke softly. "In the morning, after you have spent some quality time with your wife and your companion, I will show you a new way to fight. I believe it could benefit you in the future, having two women in your home and in your bed."

Athelstan didn't blush as deeply as he thought he might, considering that Edda had spent nearly every night of the last few weeks in his house with him and Lilith, even if nothing had happened. Lagertha lifted her hand to his arm, giving him an encouraging squeeze before he acknowledged what she said with a nod. Then she nodded and turned back to her plate. Athelstan glanced in King Horik's direction, noticing that he was still staring and deciding to further antagonize the man as he leaned over to Lilith to whisper to her.

"Lift your hand to cover my face," he instructed, waiting for her to do so before he continued. "King Horik thinks we're hiding something from him, so we're going to let him think that. After supper, I want you to find Edda and take her to the house. Asa can keep the girls here again for the night. Everyone keeps assuming we already have, so why don't we?"

Lilith knew what he meant as soon as he said it, grinning like he wanted her to and then lifting her hand to the back of his neck to lean in and kiss him. She didn't say anything, and he didn't have to, leaning away and returning to his plate. He barely glanced up at King Horik, satisfied that he'd aroused enough suspicion for the time being.

Supper began to wind down, and Lilith got up to leave before Athelstan did, stepping away just as the doors burst open with Arvid and Halldor rushing to Ragnar's side.

"You must come, Lord," Halldor commanded. "It is Torstein. He has collapsed."

Ragnar glanced back at Lilith as she stood away from the table, and then he looked at Athelstan, rising from the table and following his guards out of the Great Hall. Athelstan hurried to Lilith's side, pulling her with him as he and Lagertha followed Ragnar. Aslaug got up then, and Bjorn and Gyda followed, leaving the Great Hall to the street and then the square.

By the time they arrived to find Torstein's lifeless body in the street, nearly the entire town was there to witness it. Ragnar was calm, and he only stood there long enough to confirm that it was Torstein who was dead. Then he left, only glancing at Bjorn and then Athelstan as he returned to the Great Hall.

Lilith held Athelstan's hand tighter than she had in days, crying against his shoulder, but she wasn't sad. She was angry. Athelstan felt the same anger. He looked around at the people in the square, wondering who could have done this. There was no way it was an accident. Torstein wasn't so reckless that he would eat or drink anything if he thought it was poisoned, but he was dead. And someone would pay.

"My friend Torstein has been murdered," Bjorn exclaimed as he seethed over Torstein's body. "I swear by all the gods whoever did this will pay a heavy price!"

Floki stepped in then, turning Bjorn from the body and claiming his shoulders. "We will find the guilty one," he swore, raising his voice so everyone would hear. "And we will flay the skin from his body, and use horses to tear him apart!"

He held Bjorn in his arms, displaying so much fervor that it seemed almost rehearsed. He led Bjorn away from the square without saying anything to anyone else, and Athelstan watched, now more curious than he was angry. Floki was known to be dramatic at times, but this was completely over the top. Yes, he and Torstein had been friends, but not enough to warrant that kind of punishment for the assailant.

"Lili," Athelstan whispered. "Something isn't right."

Because King Horik was watching them, she didn't change her posture or her expression, squeezing his hand tighter and allowing him to pull her away from the crowd as Halldor and Arvid moved in to pick up Torstein's body and take it back to the Great Hall. Athelstan didn't intend to follow them back, but when they arrived at the same time, he moved around them to the back of the front entry hall where Ragnar was currently sitting with an even longer face than his son had worn in the days previous.

"Ragnar," Athelstan called, "what's happening? I know something isn't right about all of this."

Ragnar didn't speak until Halldor came to the hearth in front of them and bowed, speaking softly.

"It is done, Lord," he said.

"And the king?" Ragnar asked.

"He walked away from the square toward the beach," Halldor reported. "Roald is watching him, but not too closely."

Ragnar nodded, and Halldor left before he looked at Athelstan. "King Horik has betrayed me for the last time," he huffed, leaning forward and rubbing his hand over his face. "And this was just the first step to taking him down."

Athelstan glanced at Lilith, furrowing his brow. "Taking him down?" he repeated. "How? And how did you get your proof? I thought he was being too careful."

"Oh, he was," Ragnar acknowledged. "And if Floki had not been playing his games, then perhaps we would not be at an advantage, but alas we are."

"Floki's games?" Athelstan said. "What game is he playing now?"

Ragnar looked up from the hearth. "The one where he convinces King Horik that he no longer trusts me and wishes to overthrow me. And now, I have had my suspicions confirmed. King Horik asked Floki to kill someone to prove his loyalty, and together, we agreed that Torstein would be the best candidate. Bjorn is my son, and now, so are you. Ironically," he grinned. "And choosing either of you would have caused King Horik to be even more suspicious than he already was."

Athelstan listened carefully, realizing that at least some of Floki's behavior had been because of this game he'd been playing. At first, he was relieved, but there was still a lot of Floki's antagonism that couldn't be explained away because he'd been playing for King Horik. Then he really was jealous of Athelstan and was using this plot against the king to be an even worse ass than usual.

But that wasn't important. Right now, only one thing mattered.

"What are you planning to do?" Athelstan demanded.

Ragnar didn't say anything for half a minute, lifting his gaze to the doors of the Great Hall and then turning it to Lilith as she sat beside Athelstan. "We are moving against him," Ragnar declared. "As soon as it is time."

"And when will that be?" Athelstan pleaded.

"Soon," Ragnar assured him. "He believes Floki is loyal to him, and he has brought his entire family here for a reason. If my reasoning is correct, it will be in the next day or two. Floki is coming here later to confirm it. Tomorrow, everything will be clear. So I suggest you get your affairs in order, Athelstan. Tonight, the gods wander our streets. Odin and Freyja are choosing the slain as we speak."

Athelstan sat up straight then, taking Lilith's hand in his and squeezing harder than he intended. She lay her hand over his, bringing his attention to her before she spoke to Ragnar.

"Father," she said, "if you really doing this, then I want to help. I need to help. I cannot stand by while that man attacks us and manipulates us and thinks he will get away with it."

Ragnar began to shake his head. "My child — "

"Father, please," she almost exclaimed and then clenched her jaw. "After what he did to Athelstan, and what he did to me. I will not stand back and let him continue to use us this way. Please."

Without saying anything to her, Ragnar looked at Athelstan, scoffing softly. "Do you feel this way as well?" he pleaded. "I cannot have the two of you out there where anything might happen to you. King Horik's men will surely kill you if he finds you. And I cannot protect her out there anymore than you can."

"I can protect myself," Lilith shouted at them before either of them could speak. "And I know where my responsibilities lie. But wherever this ends, I want a part of it. I want to look in that man's eyes and show him that I am stronger than he is. And Athelstan deserves that chance as well. You cannot deny us this, Father. Please," she said again.

For another minute, Ragnar said nothing, lowering his gaze to the hearth and staring into the flames. Athelstan glanced around the Great Hall, realizing that it was almost completely empty except for Aslaug and Lagertha now both coming into the Hall together. In the time it took them to arrive at the small sitting area, Ragnar made up his mind.

"Fine," he exhaled. "But first, you will agree, Athelstan. She is your wife, and she is your responsibility."

Athelstan turned to Lilith, still holding her hand and seeing in her eyes that she was serious. Throughout her life, she'd been stubborn and independent, and though he'd tried to help her grow out of it, he saw none of that now. She wasn't being stubborn. He could see that she had decided this a long time before they'd come back, and it would be wrong to deny her this.

"Lili is right," he said, looking at Ragnar and seeing him take a deep breath. "If King Horik is responsible for all of this, then he should pay. And I want him to pay."

Lagertha and Aslaug arrived just as he spoke his last word, and Ragnar huffed again, rising and ending the conversation without saying anything.

"It is late," Aslaug said, reaching for Lilith to bid her good night. "We all need to get some rest."

She stepped in front of Athelstan, kissing his cheek and cupping his face gently before she moved to the back rooms of the Hall. Lagertha did the same, saying good night to Lilith and then embracing Athelstan tightly.

"Sleep well tonight, my friend," she whispered to him. "Tomorrow, our whole world might change."

Athelstan returned her embrace even if only briefly, leaning back to look in her eyes and seeing the same thing he'd seen in Lilith's eyes. It seemed King Horik had elicited this same look in everyone now.

Lilith didn't say anything as she pulled him out of the Great Hall, and he didn't stop her, accepting what Lagertha said and realizing it had been inevitable all along.

---

When we move into Lilith's perspective, because we know the fighting and everything that happens outside the Great Hall, I added a few things in her chapter to give her a little more life, if that hasn't happened already.

I'm going to post the second half of this tomorrow afternoon, but until then, I hope you enjoyed and I hope you come back.

Catch you on the flip side!