Chapter 35 – Duality
A/N: No beta – please excuse my writing chaos. Song: Destroyer - Of Monsters and Men
Samhain loomed before them and although, Hermione would never admit it, she was terrified. They had spent the past weeks under a muted energy. Their conversations were subdued and sparse. She had enjoyed conversing with him over Muggle science. Unsurprisingly, he had shown an immediate interest in chemistry. However, she hadn't expected him to show such intense fascination with the Muggle version of Astronomy and by extension, cosmology. Trying to explain the timespan of the universe and had rather difficult with her ultimately using the metaphor of Malfoy generations as a usable comparison. She still giggled from time to time recalling the incredulous and suspicious look he had given her, scoffing at the impossibility of it all.
Now, here they were, on All Hallow's Eve, eating a simple vegetarian meal. It would be their last meal til after the Samhain ritual, allowing only water. Hermione pushed the food around her plate, resting her cheek on her fist. She was in an odd in-between space, stuck between famished from their restricted eating habits and a stomach full of nervous butterflies. Looking up at her blond companion, whose appetite was apparently completely unbothered while immersed in a book of ancient lore, she felt compelled to voice her concerns.
"Draco?" she spoke, setting down her fork with a clatter.
"Hmm." He murmured, not lifting his eyes from the yellowed pages.
"Do you think this is the best way to do this?" she started, "Its dangerous and we don't know what the outcome will be."
He glanced up from the text, then marked his place and set the book to the side before fixing her with a level look.
"What concerns you the most?" he questioned, the sincerity of his tone surprising her. It held no malice, only genuine interest and concern.
"For starters, we don't know if it will actually work!" she declared, "What are the questions we would ask? Would she even answer them? Will there be side effects? How do we know she won't hurt you?" she huffed, tugging on a curl in flustered irritation. If there was one thing Hermione greatly detested, it was lack of knowledge.
His brows lifted slightly at her final question as if he hadn't expected her to factor in his safety as part of her concerns. Pushing his plate to the side, he folded his arms and leaned forward. She shifted to match his posture, a perfect mirror.
"To answer your first question," he began, "There's no way we'll know if it will work for sure. Its just a theory, but I wouldn't suggest it if I didn't believe there was some legitimate magical basis in the first place."
She sputtered, vexed by his seemingly subtle barb at her skepticism. Of course, there was some applicable magical theory but it was a long road between theory and the actual act of casting the magic. A hypothesis remained only that til supported by irrefutable facts. She scowled at him.
"And what would you suggest we put to Cerridwen should she deign to answer us?" she challenged.
"Well, I should think that was obvious." He shot back, giving her his signature smirk.
She growled at him, peeved at the little game he was playing and very clearly enjoying at her expense.
"Oh tuck the lion back in its den, Granger." He sighed, "It's a simple question."
"I suppose we'd ask how to complete the bond, what your role is in all this, just exactly what Cerridwen is capable of, and", she sighed back, "What is the point of it all? Cerridwen is such an ancient being and she's a literal fount of knowledge, both regular and magical."
"Then you've answered your own question." He offered, uncrossing his arms to tuck a hand under his chin.
"But that doesn't mean she'll answer them." She pouted dejectedly.
"You are worrying about something we have no control over. What else?" he pushed, tilting his head at her.
"Well, I am worried about the side effects, but that's another unknown." She huffed then looked at him, "And what about you?" she finished in a whisper, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth
"What about me?" he prompted, his face softening slightly.
"What if she hurts you like before?" she answered, alarmed at the strain in her voice.
He regarded her a long moment and Hermione squirmed under his intense gaze. Slowly, he removed his hand from his chin and placed it lightly on top of her tightly clasped hands. She let out a small puff of surprise and glanced down at the comforting gesture.
"Don't worry. There isn't anything she can do that she hasn't done before. We both know the only times she 'hurt' me was when either of you felt threatened or experienced extremely intense emotions. I plan to enter this as a neutral figure and negotiate if need be. It's what we Slytherins do best." He continued, "We are taking every precaution from the ritual cleansing to added protection spells. If anyone could travel to a magical spirit realm to speak to a rather volatile and powerful magical being with little to no guidance, it would be you."
"You are the one traveling, not me." She pointed out hotly.
"True," he agreed, "However, I don't think you'd let anything purposefully happen to me along the way. Also, if I need another argument to strength my point: Horcruxes."
Hermione dropped her head and focused on his long fingers wrapped around hers. He was right. If anyone could follow a magical breadcrumb with a level head and proper approach, it was her. For Godric's sake, Dumbledore had given her a children's book with a single symbol that had led to the destruction of one of the darkest pieces of magic in existence. They might have discovered the purpose of Ron's willed gift, the Deluminator, but it hadn't provided any actual assistance towards the hunt itself. Harry's Golden Snitch was still a mystery. She exhaled sharply, a deep exhaustion settling into her soul. The Horcruxes, Voldemort, Cerridwen, and everything weighed heavy on her. She missed her friends, her family, and she wondered when it would all, if ever, be over.
The soft stroke of his thumb across her knuckle pulled her away from the melancholy thoughts. Lifting her head, she gave him a sad smile. He knew how to push her buttons, but he also soothed the ache of loneliness she felt. Unclasping her hands, she threaded her fingers in his. His eyes widened slightly at the action and he gave her a curious look.
"No, I would never let anything happen to you." She promised softly, "You are important to me."
His grip tightened as his tugged her hand forward to brush the lightest of kisses along her knuckles. The movement set off a flurry of butterflies in her stomach.
"You are important to me as well," he offered in return, his gray eyes locked on her, "Hermione."
He gently released her hand and pulled the remainder of his dinner back in front of him.
"Let's not have this meal go to waste," he suggested, "This is our last one before we step before Cerridwen again and I suspect we'll need every ounce of strength to face her."
When Draco awoke the on Samhain, the sun had not yet risen. He had spent all night in a nearly awake state, stuck somewhere between semi-lucid dreams and a heightened sense of awareness. He knew, come evening, he would be exhausted but there was nothing that could be done about it now. He looked out the window, into the inky darkness and let out a quiet sigh. Sleep would not return. He crept out of bed and out of the room, hoping not to disturb Hermione. If anyone would be thoroughly drained after today, it would be her. He stepped into the kitchen and made for the kettle when he remembered their fasting schedule. No liquids beyond water til after the ceremony. He grimaced and changed course for the door. If he couldn't have a hot, morning tea to rouse him then a morning walk in the crisp, autumn air would certainly awaken his senses. Throwing on his cloak, he eased the door open and headed to the misty forest.
He decided to the take the path to all their set traps. Might as well take care of that chore because he wasn't sure what their energy levels would be afterwards and he didn't want any animal to potentially suffer from his thoughtlessness. The first two traps came up empty, the third was sprung but empty as well. Resetting the trap, he headed towards the fourth trap and was surprised to find a wild hare in its clutches. He was removing the line when he heard the snap of a branch nearby. Slipping his wand from it's holster, he remained crouched low to the ground using the early morning fog to camouflage himself. He hadn't received any alarms that their wards were broken but it did no harm to remain vigilant. His eyes darted to the source of the sound and upon seeing the giant form, his heart begin to beat frantically.
Before him, framed by thick and twisted ancient oaks and cloaked in swirling gray mist, was a massive beast. Thick and sharp prongs sprouted wide and formidable, draped in a mess of foliage. Its sleek alabaster flanks quivered and darkened into enormous onyx hooves. The stag stood tall and imposing, its dark eyes trained on Draco's crouched form. It gave a deep snort and Draco creeped forward slowly, mouth agape in awe. He had never seen such a magnificent creature in all his years. This specimen had to be an at least twice the normal size of regular deer with a gaze that bordered on human-like. It stamped its hooves impatiently, dipping its many branched head in the direction of Draco's wand hand. Nodding in understanding, he slipped the length of hawthorn back into its holster and placed both hands in view. Seemingly placated by the gesture, the horned creature snorted softly and moved silently towards Draco.
Draco held still, barely breathing. He knew immediately this was no normal animal, especially not on such a magically charged day. The horned creature glided forward, leaves crunching softly under its hooves, til it was mere inches from Draco. It looked down upon him and gave a slight shake, its crown of green dancing around. Draco stood, coming face to face with the creature. Inhaling sharply, he reached up and laid a tentative hand on it's silvery coat.
Upon contact, Draco was forcefully pushed out of his mind and transported to a barren landscape. Looking around in bewilderment, he stood barefoot and ankle deep in black sand as water gently rippled around him. There was no sky, no wind, no source of light. He called out but the sound was quickly lost in the void. The water continued to flow around him, but felt of nothing. He stared, perplexed, at the shimmering water. It had no temperature, no weight, nothing. Yet, he knew it existed. Crouching down, he cautiously dipped his hand beneath the water surface. He jerked his hand back and stood rather violently, his breath quickening as his hand remained dry.
Quickly wiping his hand on his trousers, he scanned the stark horizon. It was endless and vast, a distinct line between the dark water and blinding sky. Unsure of what to do he began walking forward, quickly becoming dizzy by the lack of space or rather, the entirety of it. He stopped abruptly and growled in frustration.
"Where the bloody hell am I!?", he screamed aloud.
The Underworld, came a disembodied response.
Draco whirled around and gasped when he found himself once again face to face with the horned creature. Had he heard the voice in his head of was it just floating like an echo through this cursed space?
"The Underworld? How is that possible? Who are you? WHAT are you?", He questioned audibly, his voice dense with panic.
Who or what I am is of little consequence. I know what you seek. When I learned that my mortal counterpart was seeking out my celestial consort in her purest form, I made myself known. We have very little time here. The voice began as the stag's ears flicked impatiently.
Draco felt his alarm increase tenfold. The voice was most definitely in his head and it's words were frightening. A sliver of irritation shot through him as he remembered this entire encounter was his fault. How could he have done something so foolish?
You seek her. The dark goddess. More importantly, you seek answers from her. She will not give them easily. She will test you, force you to prove your worth. Her trials are difficult, meant to foil even the most cunning of seekers. I do not speak of riddles or quests. She will reach to your very core, the depths of your mind, to divine your true nature. Do you understand mortal?
Draco nodded, his heart thumping violently against his chest. After everything he had done. Cerridwen would take a single look into his soul and find him wanting. She would laugh fiercely and turn him away empty-handed. He felt the blood drain from his face as his hands hung limply at his side.
Don't give up so easily mortal. Cerridwen knows her own mind and not even you can guess her intentions. I brought you here to remind you who you are. To guide you against her shrewd traps and wicked mind games. Cerridwen is but part of a larger magic.
Draco gaped at the creature.
What could be more powerful than Cerridwen? He wondered.
The creature bowed its head and pressed its velvety snout gently against Draco's stomach.
Your core, it spoke simply, is a balance to hers.
Draco shook his head. It wasn't possible and besides, how would this creature even know?
Do you truly not recognize who stands before you? It asked, more curious sounding than irritated at Draco's evident lack of understanding.
Draco shook his head once again. The creature withdrew with a soft sigh.
Just as Cerridwen has a mortal vessel, I share one as well. Who could be Cerridwen's equal and balance, her strength and lover? It inquired, drawing itself up to it's full height.
Draco trembled as realization dawned. His knees buckled and he fell to the black sand beneath him, the water tranquil despite his harsh movements. No…
I am Tegid Foel. Beloved of the Queen of the Dark Lake. Consort of the White Lady of Inspiration and Death. Partner of the Three-Fold Goddess of Shadow and Prophetic Powers. And you, Draco Lucius Malfoy, he thundered with a mighty shake of his daunting horns…are my vessel. Take my wisdom and set yourself to task. Find the knowledge that you seek and reunite us once again.
Draco peered up at Tegid's dominant form, his entire being shaking as the damning weight of his words sunk in. He gasped in shock and fear when the previously unfeeling water turned frigid and swirled dangerously around him. His hands begin sinking beneath the shimmering sand, its quiet beauty instantly shifting into something far more nefarious. Draco fought fiercely against the drag and pull of the quicksand.
Help me! He cried out, trying fruitlessly to reach the Tegid's stoic form.
I canhelp you here no longer. Time has run its course. Remember my words and seal the bond.
Draco tried to scream one last time as the dark sand swallowed him up and he plummeted through an endless abyss. He tried to cast spells but the suffocating sand filled his throat and his last thought was dying in this nothingness before his last gasp of air left his lungs.
Without warning, his body slammed onto hard earth, forcing the grainy sand from his mouth. Draco's lungs expanded instantly and he inhaled deeply, coughing and expelling the foreign material. He lay for a long moment, panting and gasping, when he remembered the stag. Launching upwards, he scanned the forest and found himself alone. Tegid Foel was gone. Draco scrambled to his feet and sprinted towards the cottage, leaving the swirling mist and memory of Tegid behind him.
Post A/N: What do we think? Also, I sort of did some twisting of pagan lore here. For those not knowledgeable, Cerridwen is construed as the Triple Goddess (all forms) and Tegid Foel is illustrated as the Horned God (the male counterpart). Their intertwined symbology created the pentagram (three points of the sacred feminine and two point for the divine male). More lore/symbology will be explained in the following chapter(s), but I thought that might assist everyone :)