XXXVI.
"These people didn't even know Alec.." Cora whispers and glances at Scott who is sat on the chair beside her, noticing that her words make him nod lightly and she feels him place his hand over hers on her lap.
"I know.." Scott sighs quietly as he wraps his fingers around hers and she knows it is to comfort her more than him, noticing that he looks at her and gives her a sympathetic smile. "I know it doesn't feel right." He whispers, making her smile lightly when he leans closer to kiss her cheek.
Cora feels him squeezing her hand again when he sits back into his seat, she notices he gives her another sympathetic smile before he turns his attention back to the Andromeda Initiative representative that has obviously been instructed to make a eulogy about their former Pathfinder, Alec Ryder, who's funeral her and Scott were currently attending. Cora knew that this young recruit had never met Alec, he had no idea of his history with The Alliance, he did not know how Alec liked his coffee, or that his favourite colour was green. Watching him reading off of a datapad that has been forced in front of his eyes is making her feel both hurt and offended that she hadn't been consulted, and hurt for Scott and his twin that hadn't even been mentioned. They'd so far skimmed over his forty-plus years of service, and the cold and impersonal service was leaving her feeling incredibly upset for Alec. He deserved better, and he would have never wanted all these people dressed in black that didn't even know him condensing everything he'd achieved into a few insignificant words. Luckily, the whole awful thing was quickly coming to an end and soon they'd be able to leave.
She lowers her eyes to her feet, trying to blink back the tears that she doesn't know are because she is feeling so angry that this is not the funeral Alec would have ever wanted, or the sadness that this is really the end. Cora leans over in her seat, lowering her head for a moment to take a breath to keep it steady and try to ignore the closing of the speech that makes her want to scream the more she listens to it. She feels Scott placing his hand on her back between her shoulder blades, his light and comforting touch reminding her that he's there for her. Cora knows her love is there for her benefit, and not for his own and would have most likely kept away if it hadn't been for her. When they'd first arrived they'd spotted Sara sat with her boyfriend Liam Kosta at the front of the rows of chairs, she'd watched Scott waving to her only to receive the same response he'd had when she'd first woken up. A cool glare and then looking like she was pretending he didn't even exist.
"I can't listen to this anymore," Cora whispers as she feels the warmth of him close again as he wraps his arms around her, drawing her into an embrace. "After everything he did.." She sighs and closes her eyes tightly, feeling Scott rest his head against hers and she knows he's trying to comfort her when he kisses her temple.
"It's alright.." He whispers as he lifts his hand to stroke his thumbs against her cheek. "I know this isn't what you wanted for him." Scott whispers making her nod and wrap her arms around his middle as he gathers her in his arms again. "I think we could do something ourselves.." She hears Scott continue so sits up to fix her eyes on him.
"What do you mean?" Cora whispers, her attention drawn away from the service at his words. Part of her felt guilty for getting so upset in front of him when she knows she should be comforting Scott, this was his father after all. "We aren't having another party, Scott. I hate parties." She huffs quietly and sees him smile.
"Come with me," Scott whispers as she watches him stand from his chair. "I've got a better idea than this." He smiles lightly at her when she climbs to her feet too and takes hold of his hand, letting him lead her around the chairs until they are clear of them.
"Do you want to let Sara know we are leaving?" Cora begins, lowering her voice enough to not disturb anyone as they move further away from those attending Alec's funeral. "I don't want her to be angry with you." She whispers and notices he glances at her and their eyes meet.
"I think she's already angry with me." Scott sighs lightly and lowers his eyes. "She doesn't want to talk to me for whatever reason.." He adds and she notices that he glances across to the other side of the room where Sara is sat in a wheelchair with the rest of the Pathfinder Team before his eyes return to her. "I've just got to wait for the stasis thing to wear off." Scott nods lightly but she can see he isn't convinced.
"If you're sure.." She sighs quietly and sees him give her a positive nod, she didn't want to push the issue anymore with him. Cora knew how much Sara's silence and cold shoulder was hurting Scott, but she couldn't help but think it was her that his twin was really angry with. They hadn't exactly left the Milky Way on the best terms and had been trying to be civil for Scott's sake.
"I'm sure." He smiles and kisses her forehead.
"So, what is your idea?" Cora asks as she feels him hold her hand tighter as they continue to walk together and she notices that they are almost back at her room. "Anything is better than that disrespectful, joke of a service." She huffs quietly but then pauses, she couldn't let it upset her because there was nothing she could do to change it now.
"I think we should go to EOS." Scott begins, making her glance in his direction and look at him questioningly, not sure how a trip to EOS could have anything to do with Alec's funeral. "Dad never got to see EOS." He continues making her nod lightly as they continue to walk. "I think he would have liked it there." She hears him add and when she glances at him his eyes are on hers.
"He would." Cora smiles lightly, it wasn't Habitat 7 and the world that they'd planned for so long together to be the first to be settled, but it was the first real success of the Andromeda Initiative and Alec hadn't had the chance to visit it. "I think he would have probably ended up living there." She laughs quietly and notices Scott nods in agreement.
"I think you're right. A great place for him to retire." He nods as they come to a stop outside her door. "EOS would have been the first place that he knew his dream was a reality," Scott adds and she notices he clears his throat and lift his hand to rub the back of his neck, making her realise that maybe he is struggling more than he's letting on. "So, I think we should find the highest point in Ryder tradition and remember him.." He smiles lightly at her.
"Let's do that." She returns his smile and lifts her hand to rest on his chest, offering him some of her own silent comfort that draws his eyes back to her and he places his hand over hers. "That's a really nice idea, Scott." Cora adds, smiling gratefully at him for even thinking of it. "We can't just borrow The Tempest, though." Cora laughs and notices his smile widens.
"Of course we can. I am the Pathfinder, and I definitely have to see that guy on EOS.." Scott nods positively.
"What guy?" She smiles and notices he shrugs lightly and smiles.
"You know, that guy.." Scott continues as he lifts his hands to her cheeks and keeps his eyes on hers. "That guy, about that thing." He adds making her laugh quietly before he leans closer and kisses her softly. "You wrote a report about it, remember?" Scott grins making her sigh lightly.
"Oh yes, the thing." Cora sighs again as she smiles at him.
"Bring something that reminds you of Alec, and meet me on The Tempest." Scott smiles at her making her nod as she feels him let go of her so she draws him into another kiss, feeling him smile beneath her lips. "Don't be long." He whispers.
"I won't." Cora smiles, knowing exactly what she was going to be taking with her to EOS that reminded her of time with Alec. "I'll meet you there." She nods as she watches him turn and begin walking away and towards the docking bay. Cora notices he glances over his shoulder at her and smiles, giving her a small wave before he is out of sight.
—/—
"God, this thing weighs a tonne.." Scott puffs as she watches him struggling to move Alec's lucky rock from its place on the floor of the Nomad that they've just driven from the landing zone of EOS, and where they've left The Tempest. "Mooove." He pants and pushes his shoulder against it.
"I think it's actually two tonnes." Cora smiles lightly as she folds her arms over her chest and watches Scott strain again as he continues to try and move it, the rock not moving an inch which only makes him let out a frustrated huff.
"Baby.." Scott huffs when she notices he gives up and removes his palms from the surface of the rock and lifts his hand to wipe the light layer of sweat from his forehead from his effort. "Are you just going to stand and watch?" He grins at her when she sees him stand up straight and bring his hands to rest on his hips.
"You're doing so well." Cora begins seeing him sigh and shake his head. "I didn't want to take over.." She adds with a quiet giggle that makes him smile at her. "Where would you like it?" Cora asks as she focuses her attention on the rock and begins trickling her biotics to her fingertips.
"Where do you think it should go?" Scott asks as she watches him glance over to the edge of the sandy cliff that they've decided must be the highest point on EOS and that overlooks the first AI settlement that they'd founded Prodromos. "How about there?" He adds when his eyes move back to hers and he motions with his head.
"Perfect." She smiles and notices he does too.
Cora focuses the energy that she's been slowly building on the rock, the blue tendrils of her biotics leaving her fingers in a much more controlled way than that awful night when she'd had to save Scott from his father. She tries to force away that memory and keep her thoughts on the task of moving the rock carefully, and not splitting it in two if she uses too much force. Cora smiles to herself when she notices that Scott is watching her as she easily lifts it from the floor of the Nomad and guides it to the spot overlooking everything below them. She always saw the pride on his face when he watched her, and she loved him for never being afraid or letting the others be either.
They'd decided that EOS was a good place to say goodbye to Alec, it was somewhere they both knew he would have loved. They'd also decided that leaving Alec's lucky rock behind as a memorial felt right, it had saved his life and it was only right that it marked his death. Cora wondered if it would be a place she and Scott could visit, to have a few quiet moments to think about things that were bothering them or their hopes for the future. A quiet place to remember Alec.
"You are so awesome." She hears him mumble as Cora carefully lowers the rock to the ground, watching the sand and dust clouds rise as she does. "Do some things feel heavier than others?" Scott asks when she watches him step towards the rock and begin scuffing the toe of his shoe around the bottom.
"Not heavy in the usual way." Cora nods as she moves to stand beside him and places her hand on the surface of it when his eyes move to her. "It uses more energy, but it doesn't feel heavier." She adds and notices he nods, making her smile that he is always interested in her and wants to know more. "It just takes practice." Cora smiles.
"Well, I think it and you are awesome." Scott says again and she sees a smile tug at the corner for his mouth and his blue eyes meet hers. "So, what did you bring with you?" He asks as she watches him stepping towards the open door of the Nomad and picking up both of their bags that they've stashed just inside and holding hers out to her.
"Just a couple of things." She begins as she takes her white AI bag from him, noticing that the items she'd brought with her weigh almost nothing at all and that Scott's bag looks heavier than hers. "How about you?" Cora asks and notices he shrugs lightly.
"Well.." He begins as she watches him begin opening his bag.
Cora didn't imagine that Scott had many things that reminded him of Alec or that many happy memories, but she knew he was trying and that he was wanting to help her feel better and get the closure she needed. She watches him smile at her when he lowers his hand into it, noticing he rummages for a moment before lifting his hand and she spots that he is holding Alec's N7 helmet. The helmet that Alec treasured and was proud to have earned, the helmet that had saved Scott's life on Habitat 7 when his had broken and left him gasping for air. Cora had given the N7 armour to Scott after Alec's death, knowing he would want it and that maybe it would be a good reminder of his father. She'd been right and was happy to see he'd picked it, but surprised he was ready to leave it behind.
"I think this belongs here." Scott sighs as she watches him lift the helmet up and his eyes start moving over it. "This shows that he was an N7, and that might not mean much outside of the Milky Way.." He nods and carefully places the helmet down on top of the lucky rock. "But, it meant something to him." Scott adds and she notices he rests his palm on top of it for a moment.
"It meant everything to him." Cora nods, remembering how proud Alec had been to be an N7 and how hard he'd trained. Scott was right, it might not mean much now but they knew. "I have his favourite jumper." Cora adds and notices her words draw his eyes back to her as she rummages in her own bag until her fingers come into contact with it.
"He had a favourite jumper?" Scott says, a light smile at his mouth when he waits for her to find it in her bag. Cora nods and notices this makes Scott chuckle to himself, clearly not believing Alec could have such a thing.
"I gave him this as a gift." She continues with a light smile and sees that Scott is watching her again. "He wore it so much it started to get holes in it." Cora adds, wondering if she should be talking about this with Scott but when she sees that he gives her a reassuring smile she knows he doesn't mind and is being his usual supportive self.
"I think I saw him in that," Scott says with another smile, making her remember why she loved Scott so much and how lucky she is to have him supporting her despite his feelings about Alec. "Here, sit the helmet on it." He adds as she watches him lift the helmet so she can place the jumper on the surface of the rock. "Are you sure you want to leave it here?" Scott asks as his eyes reach her face.
"Yes." Cora nods and sees he does too. "It belongs here, too." She adds when she feels Scott lift his hand to place it on her back, giving her a brief moment of comfort when she looks into his face and she knows he can probably see the hint of sadness in her eyes. "What else do you have?" She asks as he reaches into his bag again.
"I have a watch." She hears him mumble and can tell he's struggling to find it, noticing his face changes when he finally does and lifts it out of his bag. "My dad gave me a watch the day I joined the Alliance," Scott adds as he opens his palm and shows her an old fashioned wristwatch. "This isn't the actual one." He smiles at her. "I traded it for beer." Scott grins making her laugh.
"Are you joking?" Cora asks, narrowing her eyes at him and trying to decide if he was or not. It did sound like something Scott would do but she notices he laughs at her question.
"I'm joking.." Scott grins at her making her sigh. "I think the batteries ran out about six hundred years ago." He adds as she watches him turning it around in his hands and then lifting it closer to his face when he presses his ear against it. Cora notices he lifts his eyes to hers and shakes his head. "Definitely looks to be broken." He smiles lightly before lowering the watch to sit with the helmet and jumper. "But, it was a nice gift."
"I also have his favourite book.." Cora begins as his attention returns to her and she lifts it up to show him, her fingers opening the pages as she retrieves the photograph from inside it. "But, I thought maybe Sara would like to have this." She adds and sees Scott nods at her words. "Maybe you should give this to her. It might smooth things over?" Cora asks and sees him sigh.
"Sara would like to have that." Scott nods and she feels his eyes meet hers again. "She likes things like that, she's always been more materialistic than me." He continues and she remembers how few possessions Scott had in his room on Theia despite how much he enjoyed giving gifts. "Thank you for thinking of me, and of Sara." Scott smiles as she returns the book to her bag to give to him later for Sara.
"Alec had this picture among his belongings." She says as she holds up the photograph of Alec, Ellen, Scott, and Sara on the Citadel when the twins were children. Cora watches his eyes move the photo and a smile stretch onto his face. "Look how cute you are, Ryder." Cora adds and sees his eyes lift to her and he grins.
"Wow, I don't think I've ever seen this." Scott laughs lightly as she watches his eyes moving over it, noticing he smiles when he looks at his mother and then he looks back to his own sulking face. "I don't look very happy, do I? I'm not sure about cute." He adds with another chuckle. "Can I keep this?" He asks when his attention returns to her.
"Of course." She nods as he hands it back to her so she can tuck it back into the book. "That's everything I have.." Cora adds and sees Scott nod and realises he is out of belongings too. "Why don't we sit and enjoy the view?" She notices her words make him smile and he glances past her and towards Prodromos.
"That sounds good." She hears his reply and watches him lower himself to the ground, his back resting against the lucky rock as he wraps his arms around his knees "It's nice to just take a breath." Scott adds and she notices he glances up at her and that his eyes are on her when she lowers herself to the space beside him.
"Sometimes we forget to do that." Cora sighs as she settles back against the rock too, feeling how cool it is compared to how warm Scott is beside her. "Just stop, and breath." She adds and looks into his face when she notices he is watching her and that he smiles. "Thank you for thinking of this, Scott." Cora adds as she leans against his side. "I know this can't be easy for you.." She whispers and notices that he nods lightly.
"It's not easy.." Scott nods again as she watches him brushing some sand off of his legs until his eyes return to her. "You know my feelings about Alec." He adds and she notices he smiles lightly. "But, my dad did deserve better than today and I wanted you to get the chance to say goodbye." Scott nods as she notices he lowers his hand from his knee and holds it out to her.
"I appreciate you being here with me." Cora begins as she places her hand over his and slides her fingers through his, lifting her eyes to his. "It really means a lot to me." She adds as she feels him leaning against her and wrap his arm around her shoulders.
"You're welcome." Scott smiles as she relaxes into his hold and feels him placing his hand on her back. "I think I needed to say goodbye, too." He adds as she rests her head on his shoulder. "Get some closure." Scott nods before she feels him kiss her forehead.
"How does it feel to see your first achievement as Pathfinder?" Cora asks when she watches him look out over EOS, his eyes lowering to the settlement below that she knows will be busy and a hive of activity from its new inhabitants. But from up here, it was quiet and peaceful and they could hear themselves think.
"Pretty incredible." She sees Scott smile before his eyes are back on her. "It gives me hope." He adds as his smile widens when he looks at her and she lifts her hand to his cheek, stroking his skin beneath her fingers. "Maybe I can do this." He whispers making her return his smile.
"Not only can you do this.." Cora whispers. "You are doing this, Scott." She adds and sees that it makes him smile more. "EOS was the start but you've done so much since this. I'm so proud of you." She feels him wrapping both of his arms around her and hugging her tightly at her words. "Your dad would be proud of you, too." Cora whispers and hears him sighing quietly.
"I hope so." Scott whispers so she squeezes him tightly, knowing she's never heard him admit that he wanted Alec to be proud of him and that he'd always said that his father's opinion meant nothing to him. "Thank you, Cora." He adds as she feels him stroking her back. "We should have brought something to toast to him." Scott chuckles as he loosens his hold on her.
"You mean you didn't bring a beer?" Cora says, giving him a cheeky smile when his eyes meet hers. "I have some water.." She adds and notices his words make him laugh and he smiles when she strokes her palm against his forearm.
"I do actually have something else." She hears Scott mumble as she watches him drag his bag closer so he can find it. "It's not a beer." He smiles as she notices he lowers his hands into the backpack again.
"What is it?" She asks as she watches him retrieve a silver vacuum-sealed packet that she knows must contain coffee, shower gel, or something tasty. "Is that strawberry pudding?" Cora giggles as he holds it up and a smile stretches onto his face.
"You bet it is." Scott grins at her.
"Where did you get that from?" She adds when she sees him settle back next to her again, and that he doesn't look like he's going to tell her. "I hope you didn't trade any vital organs for it." Cora giggles and sees him grin and pinch the corner of the packet with his fingertips and tear it open. "How old is that packet?" Cora laughs, wondering if it's as ancient as she thinks it is.
"Does that mean you don't want any?" Scott whispers, the edge of his lips lifting as his eyes meet hers. Cora watches him lift it to his mouth and squeeze some of the bright pink pudding onto his tongue. "Wow, that is good." He mumbles and his eyes lift to hers again and as she watches him take another mouthful.
"Hand it over, Ryder." Cora huffs quietly and leans closer to him, holding her hand out and noticing her words make him laugh. "I haven't had it for such a long time." She smiles, trying to remember when they'd last been handing it out to recruits on Theia and that it was one of the first things to run out.
"Patience." Scott smiles at her before he hands the packet to her and she does as he has done and squeezes some into her mouth. "Why does it taste so much better in Andromeda?" He adds making her smile and nod in agreement, it had tasted amazing back home but now it tasted incredible. "Have some more.." He adds when she offers it back to him.
"I will eat it all." Cora giggles as she pushes it into his hands and watches him scrape his teeth against the foil to get some from the bottom, making her smile when she notices he's got a blob of pink at the edge of his mouth. "Come here.." She smiles as she leans closer and wipes it from his lips with her fingertip before taking it into her own mouth, noticing he is watching her.
"Thanks." Scott smiles as she feels him lean closer so she does too and presses her lips against his. "Mmm strawberry pudding." He grins with another kiss. "I actually saved that from Theia." Scott adds as he leans back and fixes his eyes on her, making her lift her hand and place it on the back of his neck when their eyes meet. "So yes, it's kind of old.." He nods as she strokes her fingers through the hair at the back of his head. "We can toast with pudding, right?" He smiles.
"Alec hated strawberry pudding." Cora laughs and notices he does too.
"Really?" Scott asks and she sees his eyes widen in surprise. "I guess there is no accounting for taste." He chuckles making her shake her head at him. "To Alec Ryder. " Scott says with a light smile. "For giving me this opportunity to meet you." She hears him continue and notices he smiles at her as he lifts the almost empty packet before handing it to her.
"To Alec Ryder." Cora smiles and lifts it too, her eyes fixing on him. "For changing my life, for believing in me." She adds with a sigh. "For showing me who was missing from my life." She adds and sees him smile when she leans closer and presses her lips to his. "It was you." Cora whispers against his mouth and feels him grin.
"It was you for me, too." Scott says with another soft kiss. "I'm glad we did this." Scott smiles when she nods in agreement and rests her forehead against his and continues to trail her fingers through his hair.
"Thank you for bringing me here." Cora whispers as she leans back to look at him and sees him smile. "Are you ready to head back?" She asks and watches him nod lightly and unwrap his arms from around her and climb to his feet.
"Did you want a minute?" Scott asks as she watches him brushing the dirt from his body where they've been sat on the ground before he glances at her. "I can get the Nomad ready." He adds and gives her a reassuring nod.
"Would that be okay?" Cora asks as she gets to her feet and sees him nod again as he picks up both of their bags. "Thanks, Scott." She adds and watches him lower his eyes to Alec's lucky rock and the items that they've left there.
"Goodbye, old man." Scott whispers as she notices he lifts his hand and places his palm on the helmet. "I'll make you proud, dad." He adds and she watches him glance at her and give her a small nod before he turns and walks back towards the Nomad and leaves her on her own.
"Alec.." Cora sighs as she steps closer and lowers her own palm to the top of the helmet, letting her eyes rest on it for a moment. "I just wanted to say.." She whispers when she wonders what else there is to say.
She glances up and towards the Nomad and lets her eyes settle on Scott as she watches him getting the Nomad ready to leave, packing their bags back on board and doing the checks she knows is to give her some space on her own with her thoughts. Cora notices that Scott glances over his shoulder at her, always checking to make sure she is okay and she knows she is always at the front of his thoughts. She sees him smile at her which she returns before she lowers her eyes to the helmet again.
"I promise that this is me letting go, and moving on. This is my closure." Cora whispers as she moves her fingertips to brush against the surface of the rock. "Thank you for saving him for me." She adds when her fingers come into contact with the soft fabric of his jumper. "I promise I will love and look after Scott, for the rest of my life." Cora smiles before she removes her hand from it.
"Are you ready?" Scott smiles at her when she's moved away from their memorial to Alec and has approached the Nomad, watching him step off of it to meet her when he's seen her walking back towards him.
"Ready." Cora smiles as she steps onto her toes and draws him closer so she can kiss his cheek, feeling it move beneath her mouth when her actions make his smile widen.
"What was that for?" Scott asks when his blue eyes find hers.
"I love you, Scott Ryder." Cora whispers and strokes his cheek briefly and notices how happy her words have made him. "I will love you for the rest of my life." She adds and sees him grin.
"I love you, too." Scott smiles, his eyes searching hers. "Is this because you want to drive the Nomad?" He chuckles making her laugh and shakes her head at him. "I'll love you for the rest of my life, too." Scott nods. "Come on, let's get back to The Tempest." He smiles when his eyes meet hers.
Cora lowers her hand from his face and watches him jump back into the Nomad so she follows him, noticing he climbs over the divide to lower himself into the driver's seat before he glances back as he waits for her. She sees him pat the seat beside him making her smile. Alec had saved Scott, not only because he was his son, but because he knew they'd take care of each other and she knew they always would.