Thank you to everyone who has reviewed this story, I love your feedback! Please continue to enjoy and review! I love hearing your thoughts and theories.

I do not own Inuyasha, the characters are the property of Rumiko Takahashi. Similarly, I do not receive any financial benefit from this story, just the pleasure of knowing people enjoy it.

Thank you to Fawn Eyed Girl aND Neutronstarchild for your help in writing this scene, I appreciate it so so so much.

Apologies AGAIN for the delay in posting, there has been a lot going on with school, health and other stories that were being published. If you would like to be kept up to date with spoilers and other works in progress, come find me on tumblr, same user name!

Chapter 36

Toga's hands were clasped in front of his mouth; his brows furrowed as he leaned against the window of the medical lab, his unfocused gaze looking beyond the glass. No matter how he looked at it, he was facing one of his biggest fears, and he didn't know if he could protect Inuyasha from any of it.

Toga tried to remember all the times he had seen Midoriko and Hoshiyomi together: how they acted, how they had interacted. They were strong, one of the strongest mated couples Toga had met, and yet Ryukotsusei had found a way to turn their greatest strength, their bond, into their biggest weakness.

Even with Midoriko's power and with Hoshiyomi sharing his yoki with her, Midoriko had ultimately still been human.

Yes, she shared Hoshiyomi's lifespan and could draw from his yoki to help fuel her own strength, but she was still vulnerable, a target for his enemies because she was easier to hurt…

Easier to kill.

All Ryukotsusei had to do was eliminate Midoriko, and he took out both. A mated yokai did not survive long without their other half, either following them into death or descending into madness, ultimately to be killed by another yokai.

Toga had been called for one too many of those executions.

Yet there was no denying the bond that Inuyasha and Kagome already had. Their souls remembered each other, straining for the link. They grew stronger the longer they were together, but both were still unstable. Kagura had told Toga that Inuyasha's yokai had emerged during the fight against the Thunder Brothers, before Kagome had exploded. They were driven to protect, to defend each other, pushing themselves to the limits—no. Beyond their limits.

They may not have fully mated yet, but Toga could tell… Inuyasha would never recover if anything happened to Kagome, and he would lose his son. He was already starting to see Kagome as a daughter, and while she could likely go on, she would be hollow, empty…

Like him.

He lowered his forehead to his hands.

No matter what, he could lose one or both.

As they stood right then they were dangerous, unstable, and the risk only grew as they became closer. If they mated… there was a chance, a chance, that they could stabilize, that mating was the missing piece...but, there were no guarantees. If Inuyasha had been a full yokai, he wouldn't have been so worried but…

Inuyasha wasn't. And Toga didn't know how that would impact anything. Hell, he didn't know if hanyos could have a mate, or if the mating would be incomplete, unbalanced. Hoshiyomi and Midoriko were equal partners, a seamless union. But while Hoshiyomi could draw from Midoriko's reiki… he couldn't control it.

Yet Kagome's reiki tried to help Inuyasha's yoki, even without the full bond, something that should have been impossible… but it… it wasn't.

And Toga wasn't… he didn't want to risk his youngest son, Izayoi's son, to chance.

The doors behind him burst open and Toga lifted his head to see Inuyasha's reflection in the glass.

It bothered him, but Toga knew… it wasn't his choice to make.

"How is she?" Toga's hands lowered as he pushed himself up and turned towards his son.

"She's gonna be ok; she just needs to rest." Relief was clear on Inuyasha's face as he drew closer, but there was something else… something that made Toga's heart hurt.

The innocence that had always been in Inuyasha's eyes, despite everything that had happened when he was younger, had faded, leaving a grim determination in its place. The war with Ryukotsusei was beginning to take its toll. Sure, Inuyasha had fought alongside Toga and the others them in the past, but only around their village; he hadn't seen any of the high stake's fights, the mates torn apart. And now, in one day, two coordinated attacks had shown his son, thankfully only for an instant, how painful it was to be left behind, to be helpless.

"How… how long will she be here?" Toga's voice caught as he spoke, forcing him to clear his throat.

"Rin doesn't know." Inuyasha's shoulders hunched. "They are running a few tests, seeing how her reiki is recovering, but hopefully it's soon."

"You know you can't go back to campus."

"Feh, no shit," Inuyasha sighed. "And not just us; Sango and Miroku too. None of us can stay there, not now, not until this is done."

Toga was silent. Yeah, his son had changed; he was thinking more strategically, looking at all the possible contingencies; he was now a man facing war instead of a fresh-faced boy.

He would never see Izayoi's baby boy again.

He had known that this day had been coming but still… he wasn't quite ready for it.

"Ok," Toga finally responded, nodding slowly. "I'll talk to Koga about getting rooms set up. You going to be ok here waiting?"

"Yeah," Inuyasha put his hands in his pockets, "I'll be going back in as soon as her tests are done."

"Ok. If you do need anything, either of you, just let me know."

"Thanks…" Inuyasha's voice trailed off as his father crossed to the exit. "Actually… dad?"

Toga turned quickly, concerned by the note of hesitation in his son's voice.

"You… uh… you keep asking if Kagome and I are well… you know..."

"Mated?"

"Yeah." Inuyasha's cheeks flushed pink, and Toga had to grin.

"Yeah," he echoed, earning a small glare from his son.

"Well, I was… that is… dammit." Inuyasha ran a hand though his bangs in frustration.

"Son, if you are coming to me asking about the birds and the bees, I think every yokai in the area knows that you figured that part out already." Toga's lips twitched as he watched his son's cheeks go from pink to red.

"Fucking hell, dad," Inuyasha snarled. "I'm trying to be serious here."

"I'm sorry," Toga chuckled. "You seemed nervous, and I couldn't help it."

"Yeah well, try…" Inuyasha grumbled.

"What's going on, Pup?" Toga's voice was soft as he moved next to his son.

"I just… hell…" Inuyasha let out a huff of breath before rushing his next words... "youtoldmehowrecognizemymatebutnothowtoactuallymakehermymate."

Toga's eyebrow just lifted.

"Is this in response to what happened today?"

"No, that's not it… well, not entirely it."

"Son, you can't just enter the bond because you are afraid of los…"

"You said it was her choice." Inuyasha's eyes were fierce. "You said if we share the same feelings and if she agrees, it's her choice."

"It's not something to try and enter into lightly." Toga's voice was low. "It… it doesn't always work, and when it doesn't it can be… disastrous."

"That's not going to happen with us."

"You don't know that." A hint of desperation had made its way into Toga's tone. "We don't know if hanyos can take a mate, and if they, if the bond would be incomplete. I've seen it kill the human and make the yokai go mad. I only saw it work, really work, only once."

"Yet you wanted it with my mother."

"YES," Toga hissed.

"Why was it different with you and not with us?"

"Because I don't want to lose you, Inuyasha. I don't want to risk my son."

"It's not your choice…" Inuyasha turned his gaze from his father as his jaw set. "It's ours. You told me we are the reincarnation of a mated pair, so our souls already know and accept each other, right? I love Kagome because she's Kagome; she was born for me and I was born to meet her. This is our choice." Inuyasha's eyes darted briefly to his father before turning away again. "Dammit... I wanted advice, to know what the hell we are supposed to do, not get into a fight about it."

"You're right." Inuyasha's ears twitched, flicking to focus on Toga at his words. "I'm sorry."

"Keh."

"I'm your father, pup. I'm going to worry about you, no matter how old you get," Toga said, wearily. "You'll understand one day. I almost lost you today, I'm going to be overprotective, so you just get to deal with it."

"Dad…"

"So…" Toga took a deep breath as he pinched the bridge of his nose, "mating…"

"Yeah, how do you… you know? You said something about a bite?"

Toga nodded sagely as his eyes closed, pulling up memories of what he had been told. "If you share the same feelings, and she agrees, then that bite is the start of binding your lives together. If you share your blood with her through the bite, your souls will be bound together, joining you going forward."

"If you are a bat demon like Shiori."

The amused feminine voice made Inuyasha and Toga jump, and Inuyasha spun to see Rin standing behind him with an exasperated expression.

"What do you mean?" Inuyasha looked between his father and the small woman walking towards them.

"Different yokai have different rituals, if you will, not all of them use a bite." Rin's eyebrow lifted as she shot a look at Toga. "Wasn't Inuyasha's mother your mate? Surely you knew the ritual when you asked?"

Toga's eyes were sad as they met hers. "She was, but we never got that far. She… She made her choice."

"Oh… I'm sorry," Rin said quietly, regret on her face. "But didn't you know how the process worked when you approached her?"

"Ahhh…" Toga's face heated as he rubbed the back of his neck. "It was kinda… fast. The bite was the only thing I knew of, so I just… thought it was that?"

"Let me guess, you got that from a dragon or bat yokai?"

Toga's flush deepened as he mumbled "dragon." Inuyasha turned to look at him and Toga just shrugged and mouthed "Hoshiyomi."

"So, you were going to tell Inuyasha something without knowing if it was right?" Rin's lips twitched even as she tried to keep her face stern. "The wrong ritual can be dangerous; each yoki type transfers differently. In the 500 years you were sealed, there was a LOT of research into yokai/human pairings. Come on, Inuyasha, I will show you the research. I'm guessing that you and Kagome made your decision?"

Inuyasha nodded and moved towards Rin, following her back into the depths of the medical ward.

Toga watched them, but one lingering fear made him call out.

"Will it be safe for him as a hanyo?"

Rin twisted to look at the worried man behind her, a soft smile on her face.

"It's perfectly safe." She hurried across the room to place a hand on Toga's arm, her brown eyes meeting his directly. "I know you are worried, and in your time, it may have been rare, but in this era Inuyasha isn't the first hanyo to find his mate, and there are no accounts of the couple dying during the process." She squeezed his arm and saw Toga nod slightly. The man needed some way to help, something to make him feel useful after what they had faced earlier that morning. "I'll tell him what he needs to know; why don't you talk to Koga and get some rooms ready for them? Kagome should be released soon, and they need somewhere to go."

Toga shot her a grateful look as she stepped away and turned back to Inuyasha, motioning for him to follow her to her office. She saw his ears flick down the hall towards Kagome's room and smiled.

"She was sleeping when I left." Inuyasha's face tightened as his ears lowered, and Rin stopped, waiting for him to turn to her before continuing. "She's going to be fine, Inuyasha. She's just tired from everything. Her test results after you were in to see her were drastically improved, so my recommendation is that you stay close to her for a few days." She grinned, tongue in cheek. "Think you could handle that?"

"Rin…"

"In all seriousness, Inuyasha, it really did help her." Rin moved towards her office, knowing Inuyasha was following closely. "I haven't seen anything like this in any of my research or studies, but it did. Her reiki levels were higher after 15 minutes with you there, and they slowed when you left." She took out a file, flipping it open as she turned back to Inuyasha.

"If… so if we were to…"

"Go through the mating process?" Rin grinned as Inuyasha's cheeks flushed. "Look, your relationship is no secret; it's a natural progression for a pairing as close as you."

"Doesn't mean I want everyone knowing our business," Inuyasha grumbled.

"You are surrounded by yokai with heightened senses of smell; I think that ship sailed." Rin giggled as Inuyasha's ears flattened. "Oh, come on, no one is going to tease you about it…"

"You are."

"Yes, but I'm not a yokai. Most of the yokai are envious of you, finding your mate. It's something serious, something treasured, rare. Many wind up in relationships or alliances for the sake of having children, like your father and Sesshomaru's mother. Finding your other half is a one in a million chance, even after relationships between humans and yokai became more common."

"How do you know so much about this?" Inuyasha asked, his head tilting to the side. "Are you mated?"

Rin laughed. "No. I haven't met my mate, if I would even be mated to a yokai. It's different with humans, but we would still feel the pull, the connection; it's not as instantaneous, but we know." She nodded to a picture in the corner: a dark-haired woman was standing with a tall handsome man who had light green hair. "My sister is mated to a moth yokai, which is why I first became interested in human/yokai psychology, and then later, when I was brought here to work with Jinenji, I started researching the healing properties of reiki."

"And that just… included mating rituals of different yokai?"

"Yeah… it did." Rin held the file out to him. "We like to be prepared, and once I started working with the Council, we needed the data on hand, just in case. Ryukotsusei had a pattern of going after mates, specifically targeting the humans. We needed to know how the yoki transfer worked, what abilities the human partner got, and most importantly, how to protect them. Almost a third of our yokai members have human mates: some have gone through the ritual, and some haven't because of the risk."

"What risk?"

"If one mate dies, the other soon follows." Rin's eyes were somber. "That's why Ryukotsusei's followers targeted the humans: they were seen as easier to kill. If you guys go through this, that risk is there for you, too. And since you are both on the front lines, you will be in even more danger because of it."

"You think we don't know that?" Inuyasha's eyes glowed as he looked up from the file. "That was part of why we wanted to go through this: to make the most of whatever time we have together."

"I just want to make sure you have thought through everything, that you are aware of…"

"Rin…" Inuyasha interrupted, "you've said we are different, that you haven't seen anything like this… like us… before. We want to do this, for us, and for no other reason. Yes, we know it's permanent; yes, we know it's stronger, deeper than marriage. But Rin…" Inuyasha lowered the file to the desk to rest his hands beside it. "The connections already there; there are times I can feel her with me, supporting me, taking strength from me when she needs it. Everyone says the mating lasts even in death, that you find each other again and again, but what does that look like when you do?"

"We don't know…" Rin admitted. "I've done research into it; we've talked to some of the older council members, but no one has ever seen this before. I just want to make sure you are aware of the risks on both sides."

"We are. I just need to know how."

"Ok." Rin turned the file so she could look at it with him. "The ritual is only needed with humans, which is why it wasn't so widely known in your era. It's essentially a yoki exchange; you would be infusing her with some of your yoki, connecting you further. You need to know where your yoki originates; it's different for every yokai and hanyo."

"What do you mean?"

"Yoki and reiki share similar principles, so it can originate from seven places of the body, but it's different with each individual. It's…" Rin's lips pursed as she thought, "how to describe it… when you use your abilities, when you feel your yoki surging, it's almost like a pulse, a surge, from one location."

Inuyasha's mind turned back to what he had seen while trying to control Kagome's reiki. The ribbons that had wrapped around them, connecting them, desperately reaching to be whole. As he thought back, it was as if he was seeing it from the outside, looking at it like a snapshot. What he had thought was a storm of reiki were threads broken off from the ribbons, only easing when they met the strands coming off of him. He followed the lines of the ribbons, and saw where they seemed to flow into his body…

"My chest."

"Good." Rin smiled, as she turned the file back to him. "Then this is what you are going to need to do."